Lusting
Lusting

Lusting

rankings
 rankings

rankings

koh
 koh

koh

quality
quality

quality

rvc
rvc

rvc

weekender
weekender

weekender

ons
ons

ons

overly
overly

overly

comming
comming

comming

overeating
overeating

overeating

🔥 | Latest

Victorious: PS Products A 10 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster ea List Price: $69.99 Price: $62.54 Victory! By tdoog- May 5, 2013 I purchased this after I was confronted by punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon. some I cooly asked "Remember me?" One of them looked up and said, "Have you com back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi Scout Troop needs to raise more money!" I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said. I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri scouts ran away screaming. As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym. As the others began to circle around me,I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my stomach. I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!" I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious. 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful worth the read
Victorious: PS Products
 A 10
 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun
 with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster
 ea
 List Price: $69.99
 Price: $62.54
 Victory!
 By tdoog- May 5, 2013
 I purchased this after I was confronted by
 punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm
 a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them.
 That is when I realized that I need to protect
 myself. The day after I bought this product I went
 to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was
 first mugged. I approached the group of
 hooligans standing outside the entrance,
 concealing my secret weapon.
 some
 I cooly asked "Remember me?"
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you com
 back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi
 Scout Troop needs to raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this
 time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said.
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand
 and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri
 scouts ran away screaming.
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally
 activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts
 to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the
 sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had
 brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at
 the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE
 FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit
 the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym.
 As the others began to circle around me,I
 changed techniques. Holding both of my hands
 in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and
 initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off,
 fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I
 started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers
 decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood
 there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real
 slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at
 Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back
 up my stomach.
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream
 of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the
 ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit
 the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies
 hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and
 shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my
 foes, electrocuting them with my teeth.
 Eventually they were all unconscious, and I
 walked home victorious.
 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful
worth the read

worth the read

Victorious: I almost died today. Here is the true story So Iwas derping in my backyard today, picking up dog crap. The whole time, my dog was just sitting there watching me, enjoying the sight. So I go to the small section in between my trampoline and my fence. Now if any of you haven't seen my trampoline, it is really old and there are these black foam things on the bars that used to hold up a net, but they are mostly destroyed now. So I walk in the narrow space, and I get completely covered by the hugest web I've ever felt. All over my face, all over my chest and shoulders. I freak out, but I realize that there is no worries. I see no spider, and it would have to be a big ass spider to concoct such a glorious web. Well, sure enough, in the middle of my struggle to break free, I look up, and slowly, ever so slowly, I see the huge, black-brown mass of a spider about the size of my fist crawl out of some old, decaying foam protectors. I stare at it; it stares back. I look closely for any threads connecting us, and there, glinting back at me with sunlight, is one strand of spider web, connecting the hulk spider to my face. It realizes the fact at the same time as me, and thinks, "Yes! This boy's eye sockets will make excellent breeding holes for my eggs!! and starts a full on crawling sprint towards me. I freak out, and begin to struggle even more and more to release myself from this web. It reaches the halfway mark and sees me begin to escape, so it goes for gold. The Hail Mary play. A daring leap straight for the head. Time slows down. This thing has all legs extended, blocking out the sun. A sure death for me. My left arm breaks free from the web. This could be my chance! A quick and decisive left cross reaches the spider JUST in time knocking the behemoth against the fence. It looks dazed; begins to squirm around on the ground, preparing for a counteroffensive. I don't give it a chance. I take the poop shovel in both my hands, shout a battle cry of pure victorious slaughter and smash my enemy into a crumpled pile, each strike emanating a loud crunch of the monster's body.I emerge the survivor in this battle. Thank you video games, for my improved reaction time, lest I fall victim to fate Unlike Comment Share 3 hours ago you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com epicjohndoe: This Man Should Write A Novel
Victorious: I almost died today. Here is the true story
 So Iwas derping in my backyard today, picking up dog crap. The whole
 time, my dog was just sitting there watching me, enjoying the sight. So I
 go to the small section in between my trampoline and my fence. Now if
 any of you haven't seen my trampoline, it is really old and there are
 these black foam things on the bars that used to hold up a net, but they
 are mostly destroyed now. So I walk in the narrow space, and I get
 completely covered by the hugest web I've ever felt. All over my face, all
 over my chest and shoulders. I freak out, but I realize that there is no
 worries. I see no spider, and it would have to be a big ass spider to
 concoct such a glorious web. Well, sure enough, in the middle of my
 struggle to break free, I look up, and slowly, ever so slowly, I see the
 huge, black-brown mass of a spider about the size of my fist crawl out
 of some old, decaying foam protectors. I stare at it; it stares back. I look
 closely for any threads connecting us, and there, glinting back at me
 with sunlight, is one strand of spider web, connecting the hulk spider to
 my face. It realizes the fact at the same time as me, and thinks, "Yes!
 This boy's eye sockets will make excellent breeding holes for my eggs!!
 and starts a full on crawling sprint towards me. I freak out, and begin to
 struggle even more and more to release myself from this web. It
 reaches the halfway mark and sees me begin to escape, so it goes for
 gold. The Hail Mary play. A daring leap straight for the head. Time slows
 down. This thing has all legs extended, blocking out the sun. A sure
 death for me. My left arm breaks free from the web. This could be my
 chance! A quick and decisive left cross reaches the spider JUST in time
 knocking the behemoth against the fence. It looks dazed; begins to
 squirm around on the ground, preparing for a counteroffensive. I don't
 give it a chance. I take the poop shovel in both my hands, shout a battle
 cry of pure victorious slaughter and smash my enemy into a crumpled
 pile, each strike emanating a loud crunch of the monster's body.I
 emerge the survivor in this battle. Thank you video games, for my
 improved reaction time, lest I fall victim to fate
 Unlike Comment Share 3 hours ago
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
epicjohndoe:

This Man Should Write A Novel

epicjohndoe: This Man Should Write A Novel

Victorious: vouandmeforevermore one time in 2007 i crashed the entire club penguin website. it was down for 2 days. i was banned for life youandmeforevermore stateofgracc we need to know more wxndxriand What many of you have asked, and so i shall give: in 2007, my older brother gave me a small piece of information that would soon result in the shutdown of Club Penguin for a few days. he taught me a glitch in the club penguin system that, when sitting in the coffee shop, would make your penguin sit on the ceiling of the coffee shop instead and with this piece of information, i took off. i spent hours going to every server over and over, saying the same message: everyone meet in the coffee shop tomorrow at 7 pm in the snowball server. i did this in every single server, in every location i could find. then, finally, 7 pm the next day arrived snowball had a population rating of 5. penguin:s poured into the coffee shop, all awaiting my instructions. i then gave the next message, that of the glitch. i told everyone to wait exactly 3 minutes, then perform the glitch. they did. every penguin in the coffee shop was suddenly on the ceiling, and either the club penguin coding or the club penguin offices had no idea what to do, and no way to take us down. for a small glimpse of time, we ruled victorious nothing and no one could stop us. every great kingdom awaits its downfall however. eventually, the website crashed. no one could go on the website for 2 days after that. my penguin was banned for life. Every kingdom awaits its downfall
Victorious: vouandmeforevermore
 one time in 2007 i crashed the entire club
 penguin website. it was down for 2 days. i was
 banned for life
 youandmeforevermore
 stateofgracc
 we need to know more
 wxndxriand
 What
 many of you have asked, and so i shall give:
 in 2007, my older brother gave me a small piece
 of information that would soon result in the
 shutdown of Club Penguin for a few days. he
 taught me a glitch in the club penguin system
 that, when sitting in the coffee shop, would
 make your penguin sit on the ceiling of the
 coffee shop instead
 and with this piece of information, i took off. i
 spent hours going to every server over and
 over, saying the same message: everyone meet
 in the coffee shop tomorrow at 7 pm in the
 snowball server. i did this in every single server,
 in every location i could find.
 then, finally, 7 pm the next day arrived
 snowball had a population rating of 5. penguin:s
 poured into the coffee shop, all awaiting my
 instructions. i then gave the next message, that
 of the glitch. i told everyone to wait exactly 3
 minutes, then perform the glitch. they did.
 every penguin in the coffee shop was suddenly
 on the ceiling, and either the club penguin
 coding or the club penguin offices had no idea
 what to do, and no way to take us down. for a
 small glimpse of time, we ruled victorious
 nothing and no one could stop us.
 every great kingdom awaits its downfall
 however. eventually, the website crashed. no
 one could go on the website for 2 days after
 that. my penguin was banned for life.

Every kingdom awaits its downfall

Every kingdom awaits its downfall

Victorious: Crayola e With Preferred by Teachers ar E CRAYONS 24 homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going
Victorious: Crayola
 e With
 Preferred by Teachers
 ar E
 CRAYONS
 24
homestuckpatternreference:

iamthesylveon:

f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s:

gryphynshadow:

silencingthedrums:

zeaky:

sliceofbri:

DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET

SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS

GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS 

AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE.

I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO

WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU
I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS

DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK.

There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them.

The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi)
You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted.
Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint.
Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color.
BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible.
Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.)

so what you’re saying is
i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns
and have grey body paint

i think i know where that’s going

i think we all know where that’s going

homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTH...

Victorious: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt by HomeAlarmsAndPersonalSecuritySystems (1 customer review)Like (34) Price: $48.50 In Stock. Ships from and sold by Body-n-Home Only 1 left in stock--order soon. 15 new from $36.51 1used from $60.00 xtto Amazing!, May 14, 2012 By notactuallysteve See all my reviews This review is from: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt I purchased this after I was confronted by some punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon I cooly asked "Remember me?". One of them looked up and said, "Have you come back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Girl Scout Troop needs to raise more money!" I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B***! The five girl scouts ran away screaming As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym As the others began to circle around me, I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my stomach I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the.... FLOOOOORRR!!!!" I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious <p>Still only 4/5 stars? via /r/memes <a href="https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3">https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3</a></p>
Victorious: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt
 by HomeAlarmsAndPersonalSecuritySystems
 (1 customer review)Like (34)
 Price: $48.50
 In Stock.
 Ships from and sold by Body-n-Home
 Only 1 left in stock--order soon.
 15 new from $36.51 1used from $60.00
 xtto
 Amazing!, May 14, 2012
 By notactuallysteve See all my reviews
 This review is from: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt
 I purchased this after I was confronted by some punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy,
 but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product
 I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing
 outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon
 I cooly asked "Remember me?".
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you come back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Girl Scout Troop needs to
 raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B***! The five girl scouts ran away
 screaming
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I
 woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I
 lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a
 fat kid on a jungle gym
 As the others began to circle around me, I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms
 to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started
 getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time
 was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my
 stomach
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started
 singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the.... FLOOOOORRR!!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them
 with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious
<p>Still only 4/5 stars? via /r/memes <a href="https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3">https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3</a></p>

<p>Still only 4/5 stars? via /r/memes <a href="https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3">https://ift.tt/2vCxNs3</a></p>

Victorious: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt by HomeAlarmsAnd PersonalSecuritySystems (1 customer review) |Like (34) Price:$48.50 In Stock. Ships from and sold by Body-n-Home. Only 1 left in stock--order soon. 1 used from $60.00 15 new from $36.51 See larger image Amazing!, May 14, 2012 By notactuallysteve See all my reviews This review is from: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt I purchased this after I was confronted by some punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon I cooly asked "Remember me?". One of them looked up and said, "Have you come back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Girl Scout Troop needs to raise more money!" I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said. I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B*** " The five girl scouts ran away screaming As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym As the others began to circle around me, I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my stomach I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the... FLOOO0ORRR!!!!" I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stu with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious. un and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them Still only 4/5 stars? by Olivertwist2016 FOLLOW 4 MORE MEMES.
Victorious: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt
 by HomeAlarmsAnd PersonalSecuritySystems
 (1 customer review) |Like (34)
 Price:$48.50
 In Stock.
 Ships from and sold by Body-n-Home.
 Only 1 left in stock--order soon.
 1 used from $60.00
 15 new from $36.51
 See larger image
 Amazing!, May 14, 2012
 By notactuallysteve See all my reviews
 This review is from: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt
 I purchased this after I was confronted by some punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy,
 but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product
 I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing
 outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon
 I cooly asked "Remember me?".
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you come back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Girl Scout Troop needs to
 raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said.
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B*** " The five girl scouts ran away
 screaming
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I
 woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I
 lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a
 fat kid on a jungle gym
 As the others began to circle around me, I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms
 to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started
 getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time
 was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my
 stomach
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started
 singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the... FLOOO0ORRR!!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stu
 with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious.
 un and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them
Still only 4/5 stars? by Olivertwist2016
FOLLOW 4 MORE MEMES.

Still only 4/5 stars? by Olivertwist2016 FOLLOW 4 MORE MEMES.

Victorious: Bears stand victorious after the defeat of the Human species circa 1945
Victorious: Bears stand victorious after the defeat of the Human species circa 1945

Bears stand victorious after the defeat of the Human species circa 1945

Victorious: PRIMESCENES Victorious who remembers this iconic moment? follow @primescenes (me) for more.
Victorious: PRIMESCENES
Victorious who remembers this iconic moment? follow @primescenes (me) for more.

Victorious who remembers this iconic moment? follow @primescenes (me) for more.

Victorious: Victorious miss this show so much. follow @primescenes (me) for more.
Victorious: Victorious miss this show so much. follow @primescenes (me) for more.

Victorious miss this show so much. follow @primescenes (me) for more.

Victorious: Victorious Soviet soldier drives through Berlin in his tank following the battle of Berlin (1945 Colourized)
Victorious: Victorious Soviet soldier drives through Berlin in his tank following the battle of Berlin (1945 Colourized)

Victorious Soviet soldier drives through Berlin in his tank following the battle of Berlin (1945 Colourized)