Shipped
Shipped

Shipped

Medal
Medal

Medal

This Is A
This Is A

This Is A

Give
Give

Give

Regretment
Regretment

Regretment

Draw This
Draw This

Draw This

the way
 the way

the way

honking
 honking

honking

draw
 draw

draw

ons
ons

ons

🔥 | Latest

ships: Some ships… just never sail.
ships: Some ships… just never sail.

Some ships… just never sail.

ships: cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: This is how the golden age of piracy ended. The first mermaid to get tattoos :) “we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?” “kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes. “we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.” “i know.” x “daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.” her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her. “daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor. “don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing. x “father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?” “your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.” she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says. x “why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam. “we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.” she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family. “it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.” x her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.” the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass. “why not?” the mermaid asks. “he’ll win,” the first mate says. the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks. x the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her. “don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.” x the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape. “let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.” they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her. she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings. the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone. x she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea. x “you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her. she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise. “i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.” the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. “we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either. “i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time. “guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.” “without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?” “i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?” “of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.” x the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid. “you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock. the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy. “they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.” “and now?” “they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?” the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.” She protects her family. Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link! https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817 That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there! HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
ships: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: This is how the g...

ships: bunjywunjy: lostinhistory: bidet-of-evil: officialukulele: nogoawayok: penguinsstealingsanity: that-ships-hellabig: phanfruit: krakkenchaos: swindontownswoodilypooper: petrovasinspace: f-i-v-e-byfive: thesixtysevenchevyimpala: ilovecountryeverything: titaniumbovine: peaceroxi: steveisoncrack: HEY TUMBLR, LET’S PLAY A GAME To play this game, go to MapCrunch, select “hide location”, make sure you have all countries unselected, and click go. What this will do is drop you in a random part of the world. It’s as if you woke up on the side of a road in an unfamiliar country. The goal of the game is to find your way to an airport so you can return home.  Bonus Hard Mode: No using outside sources, and that includes using google maps to figure out your location from signs or landmarks …I had plans today but now. THE AIRPORT GAME IS BACK. FUCK THIS GAME LAST TIME I PLAYED IT DUMPED ME IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORWAY I PLAYED FOR LIKE 8 HOURS BEFORE BREAKING DOWN CRYING OMG NO STOP THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!! IT’S BACK WHY IS THIS BACK WHYYYYY oh shit I HAVEN’T USED THIS GIF SINCE FEBRUARY Always reblog Mapcrunch when someone tries to bring it back it dropped me in a fucking room full of pandas Ohmygod It once dropped my in my home town a few km’s from the airport XD i think this is gonna be a problem i feel threatened also why is one of the cows blurred out who is she  I’m trapped in a bathroom and i have no reflection I am on a dock by a bay the last time I played this, it dumped me in the middle of a desert and when I turned the camera around it was literally standing next to the runway of an air force base
ships: bunjywunjy:
lostinhistory:

bidet-of-evil:

officialukulele:


nogoawayok:

penguinsstealingsanity:


that-ships-hellabig:


phanfruit:


krakkenchaos:

swindontownswoodilypooper:

petrovasinspace:

f-i-v-e-byfive:

thesixtysevenchevyimpala:

ilovecountryeverything:

titaniumbovine:

peaceroxi:

steveisoncrack:


HEY TUMBLR, LET’S PLAY A GAME
To play this game, go to MapCrunch, select “hide location”, make sure you have all countries unselected, and click go. What this will do is drop you in a random part of the world. It’s as if you woke up on the side of a road in an unfamiliar country. The goal of the game is to find your way to an airport so you can return home. 
Bonus Hard Mode: No using outside sources, and that includes using google maps to figure out your location from signs or landmarks

…I had plans today but now.

THE AIRPORT GAME IS BACK.

FUCK THIS GAME
LAST TIME I PLAYED IT DUMPED ME IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORWAY
I PLAYED FOR LIKE 8 HOURS BEFORE BREAKING DOWN CRYING

OMG NO STOP THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!!

IT’S BACK

WHY IS THIS BACK

WHYYYYY

oh shit

I HAVEN’T USED THIS GIF SINCE FEBRUARY


Always reblog Mapcrunch when someone tries to bring it back

it dropped me in a fucking room full of pandas


Ohmygod


It once dropped my in my home town a few km’s from the airport XD


i think this is gonna be a problem

i feel threatened also why is one of the cows blurred out who is she 


I’m trapped in a bathroom and i have no reflection 

I am on a dock by a bay



the last time I played this, it dumped me in the middle of a desert and when I turned the camera around it was literally standing next to the runway of an air force base

bunjywunjy: lostinhistory: bidet-of-evil: officialukulele: nogoawayok: penguinsstealingsanity: that-ships-hellabig: phanfruit:...

ships: “It ships with Linux”
ships: “It ships with Linux”

“It ships with Linux”

ships: evartandadam: Valentine’s Day- Inukag Inuyasha and Kagome from InuyashaUm, one of the best ships out there <3 So sweet, so pure <3 
ships: evartandadam:
Valentine’s Day- Inukag
Inuyasha and Kagome from InuyashaUm, one of the best ships out there <3 So sweet, so pure <3 

evartandadam: Valentine’s Day- Inukag Inuyasha and Kagome from InuyashaUm, one of the best ships out there <3 So sweet, so pure <3 

ships: pieprincess-andthe-fallenangel: westotanu: jeanjauthor: ao3commentoftheday: You’ve heard of lemons and the Citrus Scale? Well, what about KINKTOMATO? KINKTOMATO is an important concept in fandom. It’s a humourous re-spelling of YKINMKATO - Your Kink Is Not My Kink (And That’s OK). This is the idea that if you don’t like a particular kink or ship etc, that’s fine but you don’t need to attack or shame the people who do. Just leave them alone to enjoy their fics and art in peace and ask that they do the same in return.  KINKTOMATO is the “you do you” of fandom. It’s the “whatever floats your boat” of leaving other people alone. It’s an easy and judgement-free way of hoping that your fellow fans enjoy their content as much as you enjoy yours and understanding that different folks like different strokes.  Having preferences is human. Having squicks is totally normal. Everyone has NOTPs or lines they don’t want to cross. But fandom is a large group of diverse people with varying tastes and interests and backgrounds. Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations. Ship and let ship. Don’t like? Don’t read. Your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.  This, writers. And yes, do bring back “squick” because if it makes you go “ew, ick” then that’s a squick, or a hard “uh no NOT for me” it’s a squick.  (Something that’s genuinely triggering will give you symptoms like hyperventillating, shaking hands, cold sweats, nausea, the feeling like you’re gonna faint, etc, but if it just makes you go “ew, ick” and scrunches your face in distaste, then that’s a squick, my friend.) just to add on - KINKTOMATO is not easy, which goes against the usual ‘it’s not hard to just hit the back button’ narrative but I’m gonna say it. most people think they can do this stuff just fine but usually what they’re considering as ‘things they don’t like’ are things they feel neutral about. ‘I’m not really fond of X but it doesn’t make me want to run for the hills if I see it in a fic’ is not ‘oh wow I really REALLY hate that’. it takes conscious effort to be fair about it. you have to resist the urge to be like ‘this is disgusting and I want to yell at someone for subjecting my poor eyeballs to this’. sometimes you gotta leave and do other things for a few days or even weeks just because you read the tags/summary on something and were like ‘oh god nope no ew ew ew’. nobody really enjoys practicing this type of self-discipline. it is sincerely unpleasant to encounter kinks you are repulsed/squicked by. there have been times when i was lax in reading through the tags or when i assumed a tag represented one kind of take on a thing but no actually it was another, way less appealing one, and it’s not a fun time to get that particular cold glass of water thrown onto your soul. be mature and fair about it anyway. resist the urge to be the fandom equivalent of those white suburban moms who yell at underpaid (or volunteer, in this case) cashiers and demand to speak to the manager. ignore the people who will try and appeal to you by telling you that your aversion is a result of some innate Goodness on your part and that people who make things you don’t like are Evil. And friendly reminder that both tumblr and AO3 have ways to filter out unwanted tags so that you can easily go about your day without seeing content for one of your squicks or notps. In fact, I find it good practice to do an AO3 search for all of my favourite ships, filtering out all tags and ships I don’t like, and then saving that page as a bookmark/favourite to make my future fic-browsing easier. That way, I never accidentally come across something that makes me squick. And whenever I come across another ship or tag that I hate, I add that into my ‘excluded tags’ list and resave it. It’s really simple and saves me a lot of pain and effort!
ships: pieprincess-andthe-fallenangel:

westotanu:

jeanjauthor:

ao3commentoftheday:

You’ve heard of lemons and the Citrus Scale? Well, what about KINKTOMATO?
KINKTOMATO is an important concept in fandom. It’s a humourous re-spelling of YKINMKATO - Your Kink Is Not My Kink (And That’s OK). This is the idea that if you don’t like a particular kink or ship etc, that’s fine but you don’t need to attack or shame the people who do. Just leave them alone to enjoy their fics and art in peace and ask that they do the same in return. 
KINKTOMATO is the “you do you” of fandom. It’s the “whatever floats your boat” of leaving other people alone. It’s an easy and judgement-free way of hoping that your fellow fans enjoy their content as much as you enjoy yours and understanding that different folks like different strokes. 
Having preferences is human. Having squicks is totally normal. Everyone has NOTPs or lines they don’t want to cross. But fandom is a large group of diverse people with varying tastes and interests and backgrounds. Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations. Ship and let ship. Don’t like? Don’t read. Your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay. 

This, writers.
And yes, do bring back “squick” because if it makes you go “ew, ick” then that’s a squick, or a hard “uh no NOT for me” it’s a squick.  (Something that’s genuinely triggering will give you symptoms like hyperventillating, shaking hands, cold sweats, nausea, the feeling like you’re gonna faint, etc, but if it just makes you go “ew, ick” and scrunches your face in distaste, then that’s a squick, my friend.)

just to add on - KINKTOMATO is not easy, which goes against the usual ‘it’s not hard to just hit the back button’ narrative but I’m gonna say it. most people think they can do this stuff just fine but usually what 
they’re considering as ‘things they don’t like’ are things they feel neutral about. ‘I’m not really 
fond of X but it doesn’t make me want to run for the hills if I 
see it in a fic’ is not ‘oh wow I really REALLY hate that’. it takes conscious effort to be fair about it. you have to resist the urge to be like ‘this is disgusting and I want to yell at someone for subjecting my poor eyeballs to this’. sometimes you gotta leave and do other things for a few days or even weeks just because you read the tags/summary on something and were like ‘oh god nope no ew ew ew’. 
nobody really enjoys practicing this type of self-discipline. it is sincerely unpleasant to encounter kinks you are repulsed/squicked by. there have been times when i was lax in reading through the tags or when i assumed a tag represented one kind of take on a thing but no actually it was another, way less appealing one, and it’s not a fun time to get that particular cold glass of water thrown onto your soul. 
be mature and fair about it anyway. resist the urge to be the fandom equivalent of those white suburban moms who yell at underpaid (or volunteer, in this case) cashiers and demand to speak to the manager. ignore the people who will try and appeal to you by telling you that your aversion is a result of some innate Goodness on your part and that people who make things you don’t like are Evil.



And friendly reminder that both tumblr and AO3 have ways to filter out unwanted tags so that you can easily go about your day without seeing content for one of your squicks or notps. In fact, I find it good practice to do an AO3 search for all of my favourite ships, filtering out all tags and ships I don’t like, and then saving that page as a bookmark/favourite to make my future fic-browsing easier. That way, I never accidentally come across something that makes me squick. And whenever I come across another ship or tag that I hate, I add that into my ‘excluded tags’ list and resave it.
It’s really simple and saves me a lot of pain and effort!

pieprincess-andthe-fallenangel: westotanu: jeanjauthor: ao3commentoftheday: You’ve heard of lemons and the Citrus Scale? Well, what a...

ships: ironwoman359: cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: This is how the golden age of piracy ended. The first mermaid to get tattoos :) “we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?” “kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes. “we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.” “i know.” x “daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.” her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her. “daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor. “don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing. x “father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?” “your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.” she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says. x “why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam. “we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.” she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family. “it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.” x her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.” the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass. “why not?” the mermaid asks. “he’ll win,” the first mate says. the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks. x the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her. “don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.” x the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape. “let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.” they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her. she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings. the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone. x she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea. x “you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her. she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise. “i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.” the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. “we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either. “i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time. “guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.” “without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?” “i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?” “of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.” x the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid. “you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock. the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy. “they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.” “and now?” “they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?” the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.” She protects her family. Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link! https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817 That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there! HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER I love this
ships: ironwoman359:
cereusblue:

unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER



I love this

ironwoman359: cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: Th...

ships: fenixfoxtrot510: tyrantisterror: driftingindeadspace: tyrantisterror: driftingindeadspace: tyrantisterror: godzilla3092: tyrantisterror: godzilla201460: mark9-jaeger-kaiju-gesundheit: The Man of Steel vs the King of the Monsters by DR-Studios Man of steel is fucked. One is a horrifying unstoppable murder monster that smashes buildings and kills all who oppose it while laughing off the pitiful weapons humanity throws at it and never once stops to consider the value of the human lives that get caught in the wake of its titanic battles for supremacy. The other is Godzilla. I’d hate to say it, you guys, but Godzilla probably wouldn’t win that fight. Probably not, not.  At some point Godzilla would try to avoid killing innocent bystanders, at which point Superman would make the kill shot in a way that forces Godzilla’s corpse to fall onto and crush as many fleeing human beings as possible.  Superman would then toss the carcass into a dozen or so more buildings, specifically aiming for those that are still inhabited by trapped people, and maybe drag the corpse through the rubble just in case a few humans clung onto life despite their grievous wounds before finally leaving the carcass on a school or hospital to rot and fester - or maybe in the water supply to ensure the maximum amount of people can be exposed to whatever diseases result. Then he’d threaten the military not to cross him again before making a terrible sex joke at Amy Adams. I’m sorry to say, but you got both of these characters COMPLETELY backwards. No, Godzilla does go out of his way to avoid hurting innocent bystanders - at least in the 2014 movie, which is the version shown in the picture above.  Godzilla tries his best to avoid going through the Golden Gate bridge, avoids swimming through navy ships, and even tries to walk around buildings rather than through them when fighting the wicked mutos.  And he does it in a few other movies, too - one time that stands out to me occurs in the original Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla he actually leads the evil MechaGodzilla away from the city into the wilderness before having a brutal match. So yeah, I’d say I have them pretty spot on. I think the reason he doesn’t go through buildings because that would be fucking stupid. Also he didn’t seem to care enough when he started smashing the golden gate bridge with the bus full of children on it when the military attacked him. Or how about the time he flooded all of Hawaii? He’s not consciously protecting humans because all he cares about is killing the MUTOS. He most likely fights them for territory which would kind of make sense as to why he would want to be killed by Superman in the first place 1. Godzilla was knocked into the bridge by those missiles.  There’s a difference between stumbling into something when someone pushes you into it and purposely knocking that thing over.  What happened with Godzilla and the bridge was the former - he actually spent a good chunk of time avoiding the bridge and blocking it from the missiles with his body before he was finally forced through it.  That’s not Godzilla’s fault, that’s the military’s. 2. Godzilla didn’t mean to flood Hawaii - he probably wasn’t even aware of how the water was being displaced.  It’s destructive, sure, but it’s not something he could avoid.  It’s not the same as, say, a super powered murderer tackling another super powered murderer through a cornfield into a populated area like some kind of sociopath. I don’t know why you’re trying to paint Godzilla in such a negative light, but it kinda scares me. Ya’ll lay off Godzilla! He’s trying his best! His best is all he can do and it’s difficult to do so when litteral armies of people are trying to sabotage him! Godzilla is the local Lizard that won’t hurt the ants because they need each other.Superman is the invasive bird that seeks to eat all ants to assert dominance
ships: fenixfoxtrot510:

tyrantisterror:
driftingindeadspace:

tyrantisterror:

driftingindeadspace:

tyrantisterror:

godzilla3092:

tyrantisterror:

godzilla201460:

mark9-jaeger-kaiju-gesundheit:

The Man of Steel vs the King of the Monsters by DR-Studios

Man of steel is fucked.

One is a horrifying unstoppable murder monster that smashes buildings and kills all who oppose it while laughing off the pitiful weapons humanity throws at it and never once stops to consider the value of the human lives that get caught in the wake of its titanic battles for supremacy.
The other is Godzilla.

I’d hate to say it, you guys, but Godzilla probably wouldn’t win that fight.

Probably not, not.  At some point Godzilla would try to avoid killing innocent bystanders, at which point Superman would make the kill shot in a way that forces Godzilla’s corpse to fall onto and crush as many fleeing human beings as possible.  Superman would then toss the carcass into a dozen or so more buildings, specifically aiming for those that are still inhabited by trapped people, and maybe drag the corpse through the rubble just in case a few humans clung onto life despite their grievous wounds before finally leaving the carcass on a school or hospital to rot and fester - or maybe in the water supply to ensure the maximum amount of people can be exposed to whatever diseases result.
Then he’d threaten the military not to cross him again before making a terrible sex joke at Amy Adams.

I’m sorry to say, but you got both of these characters COMPLETELY backwards.

No, Godzilla does go out of his way to avoid hurting innocent bystanders - at least in the 2014 movie, which is the version shown in the picture above.  Godzilla tries his best to avoid going through the Golden Gate bridge, avoids swimming through navy ships, and even tries to walk around buildings rather than through them when fighting the wicked mutos.  And he does it in a few other movies, too - one time that stands out to me occurs in the original Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla he actually leads the evil MechaGodzilla away from the city into the wilderness before having a brutal match.
So yeah, I’d say I have them pretty spot on.

I think the reason he doesn’t go through buildings because that would be fucking stupid. Also he didn’t seem to care enough when he started smashing the golden gate bridge with the bus full of children on it when the military attacked him. Or how about the time he flooded all of Hawaii? He’s not consciously protecting humans because all he cares about is killing the MUTOS. He most likely fights them for territory which would kind of make sense as to why he would want to be killed by Superman in the first place

1. Godzilla was knocked into the bridge by those missiles.  There’s a difference between stumbling into something when someone pushes you into it and purposely knocking that thing over.  What happened with Godzilla and the bridge was the former - he actually spent a good chunk of time avoiding the bridge and blocking it from the missiles with his body before he was finally forced through it.  That’s not Godzilla’s fault, that’s the military’s.
2. Godzilla didn’t mean to flood Hawaii - he probably wasn’t even aware of how the water was being displaced.  It’s destructive, sure, but it’s not something he could avoid.  It’s not the same as, say, a super powered murderer tackling another super powered murderer through a cornfield into a populated area like some kind of sociopath.
I don’t know why you’re trying to paint Godzilla in such a negative light, but it kinda scares me.



Ya’ll lay off Godzilla! He’s trying his best! His best is all he can do and it’s difficult to do so when litteral armies of people are trying to sabotage him!


Godzilla is the local Lizard that won’t hurt the ants because they need each other.Superman is the invasive bird that seeks to eat all ants to assert dominance

fenixfoxtrot510: tyrantisterror: driftingindeadspace: tyrantisterror: driftingindeadspace: tyrantisterror: godzilla3092: tyrantiste...

ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

ships: tumblr Year in Review Ships 2019 2019 fandom: 2019’s Top 100 Ships Shipping is Tumblr’s favorite sport, and this is the Big Game. Ineffable HusbandsAziraphale & Crowley, Good Omens Klance −1Keith & Lance, Voltron: Legendary Defender JuliantinaJuliana Valdés & Valentina Carvajal, Amar a muerte Reddie +25Richie Tozier & Eddie Kaspbrak, It Jikook −1Park Jimin & Jeon Jungkook, BTS Phan −3Daniel Howell & Phil Lester, YouTubers Reylo −5Rey & Kylo Ren, the Star Wars universe Malec +1Magnus Bane & Alec Lightwood, Shadowhunters Bellarke −2Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin, The 100 Tyrus +34TJ & Cyrus, Andi Mack GendryaGendry & Arya Stark, Game of Thrones CatradoraCatra & Adora, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power Supercorp −1Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Supergirl Kiribaku −8Kirishima Eijirou & Bakugou Katsuki, Boku No Hero Academia Bumbleby +52Yang Xiao Long & Blake Belladonna, RWBY Stucky −6Steve Rogers & Bucky Barnes, the Marvel universe Jonsa +44Jon Snow & Sansa Stark, Game of Thrones Bakudeku −2Bakugou Katsuki & Midoriya Izuku, Boku No Hero Academia Stony +5Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, the Marvel universe Destiel −9Dean Winchester & Castiel, Supernatural Tododeku −13Todoroki Shouto & Midoriya Izuku, Boku No Hero Academia Drarry −1Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter, the Harry Potter universe Jonerys +43Jon Snow & Daenerys Targaryen, Game of Thrones Jaime x BrienneJaime Lannister & Brienne of Tarth, Game of Thrones IronStrange −7Tony Stark & Dr. Steven Strange, the Marvel universe EluEliott Demaury & Lucas Lallemant, SKAM France PreathChristen Press & Tobin Heath, Athletes Sasusaku +2Uchiha Sasuke & Haruno Sakura, Naruto Sheith −24Keith & Shiro, Voltron: Legendary Defender Sprousehart −10Cole Sprouse & Lili Reinhart, Actors Harringrove +38Steve Harrington & Billy Hargrove, Stranger Things Symbrock −18Venom (symbiote) & Eddie Brock, the Marvel universe Adrienette +14Adrien Agreste & Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir Choni −21Cheryl Blossom & Toni Topaz, Riverdale Taekook −16Kim Taehyung & Jeon Jungkook, BTS Marichat +5Marinette Dupain-Cheng & Chat Noir, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir RobronRobert Sugden & Aaron Dingle, Emmerdale Kaylor +11Karlie Kloss & Taylor Swift, celebrities Erasermic +16Aizawa Shouta & Yamada Hizashi, Boku no Hero Academia Ladynoir +10Ladybug & Chat Noir, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir Bughead −18Betty Cooper & Jughead Jones, Riverdale Spideypool −14Spider-Man & Deadpool, the Marvel universe SpideychellePeter Parker & Michelle Jones, the Marvel universe MalexMichael Guerin & Alex Manes, Roswell, New Mexico Wolfstar +8Remus Lupin & Sirius Black, the Harry Potter universe Sterek −10Stiles Stilinski & Derek Hale, Teen Wolf ZaDrZim & Dib, Invader Zim DavenziMatteo Florenzi & David, Druck Camren −22Camila Cabello & Lauren Jauregui, Fifth Harmony Soriku Sora & Riku, Kingdom Hearts Wayhaught −36Waverly Earp & Nicole Haught, Wynonna Earp PepperonyPepper Potts & Tony Stark, the Marvel universe Nalu +19Natsu Dragneel & Lucy Heartfilia, Fairy Tail Yoonmin −29Min Yoongi & Park Jimin, BTS LukanetteLuka Couffaine & Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir Lapidot −23Lapis Lazuli & Peridot, Steven Universe MilevenMike Wheeler & Eleven, Stranger Things Thorki −36Thor & Loki, the Marvel universe Merthur +28Merlin & Arthur Pendragon, Merlin Korrasami −22Korra & Asami Sato, The Legend of Korra Starco +3Star Butterfly & Marco Diaz, Star vs. the Forces of Evil BelizaEliza Taylor & Bob Morley, Actors McHanzo −46Jesse McCree & Hanzo Shimada, Overwatch SchmicoNico Kim & Levi Schmitt, Grey’s Anatomy Vmin −19Kim Taehyung & Park Jimin, BTS CrisanaCris Soto and Joana Bianchi, SKAM España  Johnlock −25John Watson & Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock Hannigram −8Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham, Hannibal Kacchako −32Uraraka Ochako & Bakugou Katsuki, Boku no Hero Academia Snowbaz +29Simon Snow & Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, Carry On Kaisoo +8Kim Jongin & Do Kyungsoo, EXO Deanoru −4Karolina Dean & Nico Minoru, Runaways Larry Stylinson −15Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson, One Direction WangxianLan Wangji & Wei Wuxian, Mo Dao Zu Shi IncantavaEdoardo Incanti & Eleonora Sava, SKAM Italia Clexa −28Clarke Griffin & Commander Lexa, The 100 Nygmobblepot −15Edward Nygma & Oswald Cobblepot, Gotham SnufminSnufkin & Moomin, Moominvalley PosiePenelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Legacies Bubbline −54Princess Bubblegum & Marceline, Adventure Time BallumBen Mitchell & Callum Highway, EastEnders BranjieBrooklyn Lynn Hytes & Vanessa Vanjie Matteo, RuPaul’s Drag Race HiccstridHiccup Haddock & Astrid Hofferson, How to Train Your Dragon Prinxiety +4Princey & Anxiety, Thomas Sanders PeraltiagoJake Peralta & Amy Santiago, Brooklyn Nine-Nine RayllumCallum & Rayla, The Dragon Prince Victuuri −56Victor Nikiforov & Yuri Katsuki, Yuri!!! on Ice EntrapdakEntrapta & Hordak, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power ClintashaClint Barton & Natasha Romanoff, the Marvel universe Tomdaya −6Tom Holland & Zendaya, Actors Spirk +6Spock & James Kirk, Star Trek SerireiSerizawa Katsuya & Reigen Arataka, Mob Psycho 100 Todomomo −23Todoroki Shouto & Yaoyorozu Momo, Boku no Hero Academia VoxmanLord Boxman & Professor Venomous, OK K.O.! Let’s Be Heroes RomanogersSteven Rogers & Natasha Romanoff, the Marvel universe Bechloe −62Beca Mitchell & Chloe Beale, Pitch Perfect ZelinkZelda & Link, The Legend of Zelda DavekatDave Strider & Karkat Vantas, Homestuck TerumobHanazawa Teruki & Kageyama Shigeo, Mob Psycho 100 DimilethDimitri & Byleth, Fire EmblemThe number in italics indicates how many spots a ship moved up or down from the previous year. The ones in bold weren’t on the list last year.
ships: tumblr Year in Review
 Ships
 2019
 2019
fandom:

2019’s Top 100 Ships

Shipping is Tumblr’s favorite sport, and this is the Big Game.

Ineffable HusbandsAziraphale & Crowley, Good Omens 
Klance −1Keith & Lance, Voltron: Legendary Defender 
JuliantinaJuliana Valdés & Valentina Carvajal, Amar a muerte 
Reddie +25Richie Tozier & Eddie Kaspbrak, It 
Jikook −1Park Jimin & Jeon Jungkook, BTS 
Phan −3Daniel Howell & Phil Lester, YouTubers 
Reylo −5Rey & Kylo Ren, the Star Wars universe 
Malec +1Magnus Bane & Alec Lightwood, Shadowhunters 
Bellarke −2Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin, The 100 
Tyrus +34TJ & Cyrus, Andi Mack 
GendryaGendry & Arya Stark, Game of Thrones 
CatradoraCatra & Adora, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power 
Supercorp −1Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Supergirl 
Kiribaku −8Kirishima Eijirou  & Bakugou Katsuki, Boku No Hero Academia 
Bumbleby +52Yang Xiao Long & Blake Belladonna, RWBY 
Stucky −6Steve Rogers & Bucky Barnes, the Marvel universe 
Jonsa +44Jon Snow & Sansa Stark, Game of Thrones 
Bakudeku −2Bakugou Katsuki & Midoriya Izuku, Boku No Hero Academia 
Stony +5Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, the Marvel universe 
Destiel −9Dean Winchester & Castiel, Supernatural 
Tododeku −13Todoroki Shouto & Midoriya Izuku, Boku No Hero Academia 
Drarry −1Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter, the Harry Potter universe 
Jonerys +43Jon Snow & Daenerys Targaryen, Game of Thrones 
Jaime x BrienneJaime Lannister & Brienne of Tarth, Game of Thrones 
IronStrange −7Tony Stark & Dr. Steven Strange, the Marvel universe 
EluEliott Demaury & Lucas Lallemant, SKAM France 
PreathChristen Press & Tobin Heath, Athletes 
Sasusaku +2Uchiha Sasuke & Haruno Sakura, Naruto 
Sheith −24Keith & Shiro, Voltron: Legendary Defender 
Sprousehart −10Cole Sprouse & Lili Reinhart, Actors 
Harringrove +38Steve Harrington & Billy Hargrove, Stranger Things 
Symbrock −18Venom (symbiote) & Eddie Brock, the Marvel universe 
Adrienette +14Adrien Agreste & Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir 
Choni −21Cheryl Blossom & Toni Topaz, Riverdale 
Taekook −16Kim Taehyung & Jeon Jungkook, BTS 
Marichat +5Marinette Dupain-Cheng & Chat Noir, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir 
RobronRobert Sugden & Aaron Dingle, Emmerdale 
Kaylor +11Karlie Kloss & Taylor Swift, celebrities 
Erasermic +16Aizawa Shouta & Yamada Hizashi, Boku no Hero Academia 
Ladynoir +10Ladybug & Chat Noir, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir 
Bughead −18Betty Cooper & Jughead Jones, Riverdale 
Spideypool −14Spider-Man & Deadpool, the Marvel universe 
SpideychellePeter Parker & Michelle Jones, the Marvel universe 
MalexMichael Guerin & Alex Manes, Roswell, New Mexico 
Wolfstar +8Remus Lupin & Sirius Black, the Harry Potter universe 
Sterek −10Stiles Stilinski & Derek Hale, Teen Wolf 
ZaDrZim & Dib, Invader Zim 
DavenziMatteo Florenzi & David, Druck 
Camren −22Camila Cabello & Lauren Jauregui, Fifth Harmony
Soriku Sora & Riku, Kingdom Hearts
Wayhaught −36Waverly Earp & Nicole Haught, Wynonna Earp
PepperonyPepper Potts & Tony Stark, the Marvel universe
Nalu +19Natsu Dragneel & Lucy Heartfilia, Fairy Tail
Yoonmin −29Min Yoongi & Park Jimin, BTS
LukanetteLuka Couffaine & Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir
Lapidot −23Lapis Lazuli & Peridot, Steven Universe
MilevenMike Wheeler & Eleven, Stranger Things
Thorki −36Thor & Loki, the Marvel universe
Merthur +28Merlin & Arthur Pendragon, Merlin
Korrasami −22Korra & Asami Sato, The Legend of Korra
Starco +3Star Butterfly & Marco Diaz, Star vs. the Forces of Evil
BelizaEliza Taylor & Bob Morley, Actors
McHanzo −46Jesse McCree & Hanzo Shimada, Overwatch
SchmicoNico Kim & Levi Schmitt, Grey’s Anatomy
Vmin −19Kim Taehyung & Park Jimin, BTS
CrisanaCris Soto and Joana Bianchi, SKAM España 
Johnlock −25John Watson & Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock
Hannigram −8Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham, Hannibal
Kacchako −32Uraraka Ochako & Bakugou Katsuki, Boku no Hero Academia
Snowbaz +29Simon Snow & Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, Carry On
Kaisoo +8Kim Jongin & Do Kyungsoo, EXO
Deanoru −4Karolina Dean & Nico Minoru, Runaways
Larry Stylinson −15Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson, One Direction
WangxianLan Wangji & Wei Wuxian, Mo Dao Zu Shi
IncantavaEdoardo Incanti & Eleonora Sava, SKAM Italia
Clexa −28Clarke Griffin & Commander Lexa, The 100
Nygmobblepot −15Edward Nygma & Oswald Cobblepot, Gotham
SnufminSnufkin & Moomin, Moominvalley
PosiePenelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Legacies
Bubbline −54Princess Bubblegum & Marceline, Adventure Time
BallumBen Mitchell & Callum Highway, EastEnders
BranjieBrooklyn Lynn Hytes & Vanessa Vanjie Matteo, RuPaul’s Drag Race
HiccstridHiccup Haddock & Astrid Hofferson, How to Train Your Dragon
Prinxiety +4Princey & Anxiety, Thomas Sanders
PeraltiagoJake Peralta & Amy Santiago, Brooklyn Nine-Nine
RayllumCallum & Rayla, The Dragon Prince
Victuuri −56Victor Nikiforov & Yuri Katsuki, Yuri!!! on Ice
EntrapdakEntrapta & Hordak, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power
ClintashaClint Barton & Natasha Romanoff, the Marvel universe
Tomdaya −6Tom Holland & Zendaya, Actors
Spirk +6Spock & James Kirk, Star Trek
SerireiSerizawa Katsuya & Reigen Arataka, Mob Psycho 100
Todomomo −23Todoroki Shouto & Yaoyorozu Momo, Boku no Hero Academia
VoxmanLord Boxman & Professor Venomous, OK K.O.! Let’s Be Heroes
RomanogersSteven Rogers & Natasha Romanoff, the Marvel universe
Bechloe −62Beca Mitchell & Chloe Beale, Pitch Perfect
ZelinkZelda & Link, The Legend of Zelda
DavekatDave Strider & Karkat Vantas, Homestuck
TerumobHanazawa Teruki & Kageyama Shigeo, Mob Psycho 100
DimilethDimitri & Byleth, Fire EmblemThe number in italics indicates how many spots a ship moved up or down from the previous year. The ones in bold weren’t on the list last year.

fandom: 2019’s Top 100 Ships Shipping is Tumblr’s favorite sport, and this is the Big Game. Ineffable HusbandsAziraphale & Crowley, Go...

ships: Year in Review t Year in Review 2019 2019 fandom: 2019 is coming to a close, and you know what that means—time to review the year! This is our seventh stint, and we’re doing things a little differently this time around. The biggest change is in how we collect data: this year’s lists account for a full 365 days, from October 21st, 2018 through October 20th, 2019, meaning this is the first time we’re taking data from December into account. Welcome to Year in Review, December!This year, you’ll be treated to 36 lists and five editorial posts that dive a little deeper into certain communities. We’ve expanded a few lists (hello, 100 K-pop stars!) and added some new ones (Movies, Anime, and TV characters!) for your viewing pleasure.It’s all here, all December, all for you. Here’s to another year. For now, here is a master guide to this year’s posts:Best of 2019Top 100 ShipsActressesActorsMoviesMovie CharactersLive-Action TVAnimated TVTV Show CharactersA History of Good Omens SpoilersEditsIncorrect QuotesReality TVTV PersonalitiesPro WrestlersAthletesK-PopK-Pop StarsMusic GroupsSolo ArtistsMusicalsBooksAuthors & PoetsVideo GamesThe Mineblr Renaissance Mobile GamesVideo Game CharactersPokémonAnime & MangaAnime & Manga CharactersWeb CelebritiesWeb SeriesMemesThe Best of Answer Time 2019Tumblr CommunitiesArt StylesBeauty + Fashion BrandsAstrology SignsTumblr and Social Impact in 2019LGBTQIA+ on Tumblr in 2019
ships: Year in Review
 t
 Year in Review
 2019
 2019
fandom:

2019 is coming to a close, and you know what that means—time to review the year! This is our seventh stint, and we’re doing things a little differently this time around. The biggest change is in how we collect data: this year’s lists account for a full 365 days, from October 21st, 2018 through October 20th, 2019, meaning this is the first time we’re taking data from December into account. Welcome to Year in Review, December!This year, you’ll be treated to 36 lists and five editorial posts that dive a little deeper into certain communities. We’ve expanded a few lists (hello, 100 K-pop stars!) and added some new ones (Movies, Anime, and TV characters!) for your viewing pleasure.It’s all here, all December, all for you. Here’s to another year. For now, here is a master guide to this year’s posts:Best of 2019Top 100 ShipsActressesActorsMoviesMovie CharactersLive-Action TVAnimated TVTV Show CharactersA History of Good Omens SpoilersEditsIncorrect QuotesReality TVTV PersonalitiesPro WrestlersAthletesK-PopK-Pop StarsMusic GroupsSolo ArtistsMusicalsBooksAuthors & PoetsVideo GamesThe Mineblr Renaissance Mobile GamesVideo Game CharactersPokémonAnime & MangaAnime & Manga CharactersWeb CelebritiesWeb SeriesMemesThe Best of Answer Time 2019Tumblr CommunitiesArt StylesBeauty + Fashion BrandsAstrology SignsTumblr and Social Impact in 2019LGBTQIA+ on Tumblr in 2019

fandom: 2019 is coming to a close, and you know what that means—time to review the year! This is our seventh stint, and we’re doing thin...

ships: ka-go-me:                                              ʟɛǟռ օռ ʍɛ Inuvember day 14: Kikyou Ships 【★】~Twitter
ships: ka-go-me:
                                             ʟɛǟռ օռ ʍɛ
Inuvember day 14: Kikyou Ships
【★】~Twitter

ka-go-me:                                              ʟɛǟռ օռ ʍɛ Inuvember day 14: Kikyou Ships 【★】~Twitter

ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

ships: homestuckgirls: master of the ships!!!!! :3
ships: homestuckgirls:

master of the ships!!!!! :3

homestuckgirls: master of the ships!!!!! :3

ships: ansf2.00ativ deos po an 25000 fandoms izhunny: expectogladiolus: phiralovesloki: kiralamouse: coaldustcanary: transformativeworks: العربية • Bahasa Indonesia • català • Čeština • dansk • Deutsch • Ελληνικά • English • español • français • italiano • magyar • Nederlands • norsk • polski • português brasileiro • português europeu • Română • Русский • svenska • Wikang Filipino • 中文 AO3 has reached 25,000 fandoms! To celebrate, we’ve put together info about fandom tags and how all tags work: https://goo.gl/W4wPxH Hey folks who use AO3 - please read and reblog widely. In addition to the celebration of our 25,000th canonical fandom, this post contains some great tips for making our tagging system work for you. As a Support Staffer and Tag Wrangler for AO3, I beg you: Among the tips: Separate your / and & ships / is for romantic and/or sexual relationships. & is for platonic relationships only – ones that are neither sexual nor romantic. (Pre- and Post-Relationship are still /.) & was created for those Gen fans who don’t want anything non-platonic in the ships they’re searching for. You can help both Gen fans and shippers by carefully choosing the tag that matches your work! Look, I know you’re writing a slow burn where the friendship aspect of the relationship is important. I applaud that; I love it in my romantic pairings. But it’s a /, not a &. Please save & for those of us who want to find the three truly and purely gen fics for a popular romantic ship. Folks, I LOVE AO3, please read and share! As someone relatively new to using AO3, I did not really realise this. *goes back to check tags* THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS.  TAG WRANGLING: For Pairings / is for romantic or sexual relationships & is for platonic, non-romantic, non-sexual relationships
ships: ansf2.00ativ
 deos po
 an 25000 fandoms
izhunny:

expectogladiolus:

phiralovesloki:

kiralamouse:

coaldustcanary:

transformativeworks:

العربية • Bahasa Indonesia • català • Čeština • dansk • Deutsch • Ελληνικά • English • español • français • italiano • magyar • Nederlands • norsk • polski • português brasileiro • português europeu • Română • Русский • svenska • Wikang Filipino • 中文

AO3 has reached 25,000 fandoms! To celebrate, we’ve put together info about fandom tags and how all tags work: https://goo.gl/W4wPxH

Hey folks who use AO3 - please read and reblog widely. In addition to the celebration of our 25,000th canonical fandom, this post contains some great tips for making our tagging system work for you.
As a Support Staffer and Tag Wrangler for AO3, I beg you:

Among the tips:
Separate your / and & ships / is for romantic and/or sexual 
relationships. & is for platonic relationships only – ones that are 
neither sexual nor romantic. (Pre- and Post-Relationship are still /.) 
& was created for those Gen fans who don’t want anything 
non-platonic in the ships they’re searching for. You can help both Gen 
fans and shippers by carefully choosing the tag that matches your work!
Look, I know you’re writing a slow burn where the friendship aspect of the relationship is important. I applaud that; I love it in my romantic pairings. But it’s a /, not a &. Please save & for those of us who want to find the three truly and purely gen fics for a popular romantic ship.

Folks, I LOVE AO3, please read and share!

As someone relatively new to using AO3, I did not really realise this. *goes back to check tags* THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS. 


TAG WRANGLING: For Pairings
/ is for romantic or sexual relationships 
& is for platonic, non-romantic, non-sexual relationships

izhunny: expectogladiolus: phiralovesloki: kiralamouse: coaldustcanary: transformativeworks: العربية • Bahasa Indonesia • català •...

ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
ships: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

ships: missgoldnweek: Inuvember 2018 - Day 20- Ships; Sesshomaru and Kagome
ships: missgoldnweek:
Inuvember 2018 - Day 20- Ships; Sesshomaru and Kagome

missgoldnweek: Inuvember 2018 - Day 20- Ships; Sesshomaru and Kagome

ships: snarling-through-our-smiles I once lost my keys at a frat house. My drunk ass had actually walked home without them, pounded on my apartment door, gotten let in by my rightfully- disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to pass out on the couch. Apparently I puked in the toilet before passing out do not remember The next morning, I schlepped back to the frat house. I stood there, right in front of the front door. This was a novel experience for me. I'd never been at a frat house in broad daylight before. A boy, presumably, of the house, asked me what I was doing. "I lost my keys in here last night, I called back. "I was seeing if I could go in and look for them?" He opened the door and gestured for me o come in. "Go wherever you want." I'd never seen a frat house post-party Derore. Wandering up the stairs a by hungover and still-drunk frat boys sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food and showers like moths to a porch light. A few of them threw puzzled glances my way. I'm sure they thought I was some post-bacchanalia hallucination. I entered one room where a boy was drunkenly watching some Old Yeller- esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of his room from his bed. "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice from the fact that his face was squished against his pillow and half-buried by his blanket. I told him I did. e mumbled again, pleased, and asked what I was doing. I told him I was looking my keys. "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around bere I didn't doubt him. Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched just about every bedroom and nuclear- at dumn-site of a bathroom in that house. I'd given up on ever finding my keys and was prepared to beg my roommates' forgiveness and get a new set copied. As I stood there in the hallway, silently a particularly burly frat boy approached me. "You need help with something? "I lost my keys here last night and I can't find them, I've looked everywhere. "What do they look like? I'll put it into the group chat. He was already pulling out his phone. No one ever checks a group chat, I thought, but what the hell. It was worth a shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss He nodded, presumably typing this description faithfully into the group chat. "Alright, I sent the message out. Good luck. e turned and left. And with that, A few moments later, I heard a distant and it was getting louder and louder, One assumes that how I felt in that moment was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest stampede through the ravine as a horde large young men all thundered down the stairs, making a beeling for me. "Someone tell the girl!" One of them shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey, GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!! They circled around me. I hadn't felt that old, One of them split himself off from the crowd. "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys from his pocket, "your keys? And lo, there was the distinctive bright millennial pink cat keychain dangling off the ring. "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes." "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYY!!" The cheer went up. Turns out he found them in the bathroom upstairs. I thanked them again profusely. There was a scattered round of "no problems" and then, just suddenly as they descended, they all dispersed, like ships in the night. gatorfisch THIS is boys will be boys Nice Frathouse
ships: snarling-through-our-smiles
 I once lost my keys at a frat house.
 My drunk ass had actually walked home
 without them, pounded on my apartment
 door, gotten let in by my rightfully-
 disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to
 pass out on the couch. Apparently I
 puked in the toilet before passing out
 do not remember
 The next morning, I schlepped back to the
 frat house. I stood there, right in front of
 the front door. This was a novel
 experience for me. I'd never been at a frat
 house in broad daylight before.
 A boy, presumably, of the house, asked
 me what I was doing.
 "I lost my keys in here last night, I called
 back. "I was seeing if I could go in and
 look for them?"
 He opened the door and gestured for me
 o come in.
 "Go wherever you want."
 I'd never seen a frat house post-party
 Derore. Wandering up the stairs a
 by
 hungover and still-drunk frat boys
 sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food
 and showers like moths to a porch light.
 A few of them threw puzzled glances my
 way. I'm sure they thought I was some
 post-bacchanalia hallucination.
 I entered one room where a boy was
 drunkenly watching some Old Yeller-
 esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of
 his room from his bed.
 "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice
 from the fact that his face was squished
 against his pillow and half-buried by his
 blanket.
 I told him I did.
 e mumbled again, pleased, and asked
 what I was doing. I told him I was looking
 my keys.
 "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around
 bere
 I didn't doubt him.
 Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched
 just about every bedroom and nuclear-
 at dumn-site of a bathroom in that
 house. I'd given up on ever finding my
 keys and was prepared to beg my
 roommates' forgiveness and get a new
 set copied.
 As I stood there in the hallway, silently
 a particularly
 burly frat boy approached me.
 "You need help with something?
 "I lost my keys here last night and I can't
 find them, I've looked everywhere.
 "What do they look like? I'll put it into the
 group chat. He was already pulling out
 his phone.
 No one ever checks a group chat, I
 thought, but what the hell. It was worth a
 shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The
 keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like
 yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss
 He nodded, presumably typing this
 description faithfully into the group chat.
 "Alright, I sent the message out. Good
 luck.
 e turned and left.
 And with that,
 A few moments later, I heard a distant
 and it was getting louder and louder, One
 assumes that how I felt in that moment
 was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest
 stampede through the ravine as a horde
 large young men all thundered down
 the stairs, making a beeling for me.
 "Someone tell the girl!" One of them
 shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey,
 GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!!
 They circled around me. I hadn't felt that
 old, One of them split himself off from
 the crowd.
 "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys
 from his pocket, "your keys?
 And lo, there was the distinctive bright
 millennial pink cat keychain dangling off
 the ring.
 "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes."
 "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
 YYYYYYYYYY!!"
 The cheer went up.
 Turns out he found them in the bathroom
 upstairs. I thanked them again profusely.
 There was a scattered round of "no
 problems" and then, just
 suddenly as
 they descended, they all dispersed, like
 ships in the night.
 gatorfisch
 THIS is boys will be boys
Nice Frathouse

Nice Frathouse

ships: KIMARU KIMARU KIMARU ikimaru: drew those she-ra ships suggestions from the other day! ✨
ships: KIMARU

 KIMARU

 KIMARU
ikimaru:



drew those she-ra ships suggestions from the other day! ✨

ikimaru: drew those she-ra ships suggestions from the other day! ✨