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Several: atlinmerrick: dancinggrimm: truckyousasha: thekaraokeninja: fandomsandfeminism: generalmaluga: albinwonderland: fandomsandfeminism: betterthanabortion: “My body, my choice” only makes sense when someone else’s life isn’t at stake. Fun fact: If my younger sister was in a car accident and desperately needed a blood transfusion to live, and I was the only person on Earth who could donate blood to save her, and even though donating blood is a relatively easy, safe, and quick procedure no one can force me to give blood. Yes, even to save the life of a fully grown person, it would be ILLEGAL to FORCE me to donate blood if I didn’t want to. See, we have this concept called “bodily autonomy.” It’s this….cultural notion that a person’s control over their own body is above all important and must not be infringed upon.  Like, we can’t even take LIFE SAVING organs from CORPSES unless the person whose corpse it is gave consent before their death. Even corpses get bodily autonomy.  To tell people that they MUST sacrifice their bodily autonomy for 9 months against their will in an incredibly expensive, invasive, difficult process to save what YOU view as another human life (a debatable claim in the early stages of pregnancy when the VAST majority of abortions are performed) is desperately unethical. You can’t even ask people to sacrifice bodily autonomy to give up organs they aren’t using anymore after they have died.  You’re asking people who can become pregnant to accept less bodily autonomy than we grant to dead bodies.  reblogging for commentary  But, assuming the mother wasn’t raped, the choice to HAVE a baby and risk sacrificing their “bodily autonomy” is a choice that the mother made. YOu don’t have to have sex with someone. Cases of rape aside, it isn’t ethical to say abortion is justified. The unborn baby has rights, too.  First point: Bodily autonomy can be preserved, even if another life is dependent on it. See again the example about the blood donation.  And here’s another point: When you say that “rape is the exception” you betray something FUNDAMENTALLY BROKEN about your own argument. Because a fetus produced from sexual assault is biologically NO DIFFERENT than a fetus produced from consensual sex. No difference at all. If one is alive, so is the other. If one is a person, so is the other. If one has a soul, then so does the other. If one is a little blessing that happened for a reason and must be protected, then so is the other.  When you say that “Rape is the exception” what you betray is this: It isn’t about a life. This isn’t about the little soul sitting inside some person’s womb, because if it was you wouldn’t care about HOW it got there, only that it is a little life that needs protecting. When you say “rape is the exception” what you say is this: You are treating pregnancy as a punishment. You are PUNISHING people who have had CONSENSUAL SEX but don’t want to go through a pregnancy. People who DARED to have consensual sex without the goal of procreation in mind, and this is their “consequence.”  And that is gross.  ^ THIS. This is this this THIS THIS THIS. THIS!!!!! This is probably the strongest and well worded/supported argument for abortion that I have ever read. WHY THE FUCK HAS TUMBLR FLAGGED THIS?! i’M FUCKING FURIOUS!!! Yep, this was flagged for me too. Which is why I’m going to reblog it several time until Tumblr implodes.
Several: atlinmerrick:
dancinggrimm:

truckyousasha:

thekaraokeninja:

fandomsandfeminism:

generalmaluga:

albinwonderland:

fandomsandfeminism:

betterthanabortion:

“My body, my choice” only makes sense when someone else’s life isn’t at stake.

Fun fact: If my younger sister was in a car accident and desperately needed a blood transfusion to live, and I was the only person on Earth who could donate blood to save her, and even though donating blood is a relatively easy, safe, and quick procedure no one can force me to give blood. Yes, even to save the life of a fully grown person, it would be ILLEGAL to FORCE me to donate blood if I didn’t want to.
See, we have this concept called “bodily autonomy.” It’s this….cultural notion that a person’s control over their own body is above all important and must not be infringed upon. 
Like, we can’t even take LIFE SAVING organs from CORPSES unless the person whose corpse it is gave consent before their death. Even corpses get bodily autonomy. 
To tell people that they MUST sacrifice their bodily autonomy for 9 months against their will in an incredibly expensive, invasive, difficult process to save what YOU view as another human life (a debatable claim in the early stages of pregnancy when the VAST majority of abortions are performed) is desperately unethical. You can’t even ask people to sacrifice bodily autonomy to give up organs they aren’t using anymore after they have died. 
You’re asking people who can become pregnant to accept less bodily autonomy than we grant to dead bodies. 

reblogging for commentary 

But, assuming the mother wasn’t raped, the choice to HAVE a baby and risk sacrificing their “bodily autonomy” is a choice that the mother made. YOu don’t have to have sex with someone. Cases of rape aside, it isn’t ethical to say abortion is justified. The unborn baby has rights, too. 

First point: Bodily autonomy can be preserved, even if another life is dependent on it. See again the example about the blood donation. 
And here’s another point: When you say that “rape is the exception” you betray something FUNDAMENTALLY BROKEN about your own argument.
Because a fetus produced from sexual assault is biologically NO DIFFERENT than a fetus produced from consensual sex. No difference at all.
If one is alive, so is the other. If one is a person, so is the other. If one has a soul, then so does the other. If one is a little blessing that happened for a reason and must be protected, then so is the other. 
When you say that “Rape is the exception” what you betray is this: It isn’t about a life. This isn’t about the little soul sitting inside some person’s womb, because if it was you wouldn’t care about HOW it got there, only that it is a little life that needs protecting.
When you say “rape is the exception” what you say is this: You are treating pregnancy as a punishment. You are PUNISHING people who have had CONSENSUAL SEX but don’t want to go through a pregnancy. People who DARED to have consensual sex without the goal of procreation in mind, and this is their “consequence.” 
And that is gross. 

^ THIS. This is this this THIS THIS THIS. THIS!!!!!

This is probably the strongest and well worded/supported argument for abortion that I have ever read.

WHY THE FUCK HAS TUMBLR FLAGGED THIS?! i’M FUCKING FURIOUS!!!

Yep, this was flagged for me too. Which is why I’m going to reblog it several time until Tumblr implodes.

atlinmerrick: dancinggrimm: truckyousasha: thekaraokeninja: fandomsandfeminism: generalmaluga: albinwonderland: fandomsandfeminism:...

Several: dynastylnoire: writernotwaiting: hellenhighwater: astolen98saturnsedan: luadell: thisnewdevilry: sputnikcentury: teapotsahoy: lovedsomuch: warsfeils: anubituf: harukami: last-snowfall: weareallmedie: firedanceryote: reptila-tequila: qeilla: thefreckledavantgardegoober: mysticmisfit89: Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada….. No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck. And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car. moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.” like, fuck off with that I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals. They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people. Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away. I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING Moose are terrifying, you guys. I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist. I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside. If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah.  Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month.  Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD. Moose. MOOSE. I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this. The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that. Moose confirmed for actual kaiju. Kaiju category: Maple.   Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. @ssalogel For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is  4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant” And they can run up to 40 miles per hour A 16 wheeler with fur
Several: dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lovedsomuch:

warsfeils:

anubituf:

harukami:

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”
like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING
Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.
I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 
Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 
Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.
Moose. MOOSE.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.


Kaiju category: Maple.  


Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. 

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is 

4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour


A 16 wheeler with fur

dynastylnoire: writernotwaiting: hellenhighwater: astolen98saturnsedan: luadell: thisnewdevilry: sputnikcentury: teapotsahoy: lov...

Several: iamcon-fu-sion: archivistofnerddom: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us. Unrealistic body images helps no one and actively hurts men too!! since the discussion of that they put henry cavill through for the witcher is floating around my blog, i want to add this too,. one of the reasons producers get away with this in men and no one criticizes it is because we are fed the lie that this body type is 1) attainable and 2) healthy. We know starving women down to skinniness is unhealthy, but you see an overmuscled man and you don’t immediately think dehydration.  Remember when people shat all over Adam Driver because even though he’s clearly muscular he didn’t have ridiculously toned abs in that one shirtless scene from TLJ because heaven forbid he decided not to deprive his body of vital nutrients just to look like a Greek sculpture? Oh! And remember that dumb take about Jason Momoa “letting himself go“ and “having a dad bod“ because of that one candid beach picture where he had his normal healthy layer fat instead of his toned GoT physique? Good times.
Several: iamcon-fu-sion:

archivistofnerddom:

shipperwolf1:

brunhiddensmusings:

fierceawakening:

guyveranimefan87:

eric-coldfire:

eldritchgentleman:

cruxofargon:

the-critical-feminist:

cishetwhiteoppressor:

Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit.
Source

My god I love her.

I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT.
When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. 
Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”.
The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. 
Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist.

You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. 

Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex.

If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here.
Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he?
Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”. 
Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular.
As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!”
It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better.
According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables. 
Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%…
… But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time.
I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then…
There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration…
And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia
Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder…
So… Thanks Hollywood?


I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this.

dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting

real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent 
guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us.



Unrealistic body images helps no one and actively hurts men too!!

since the discussion of that they put henry cavill through for the witcher is floating around my blog, i want to add this too,.
one of the reasons producers get away with this in men and no one criticizes it is because we are fed the lie that this body type is 1) attainable and 2) healthy.
We know starving women down to skinniness is unhealthy, but you see an overmuscled man and you don’t immediately think dehydration. 



Remember when people shat all over Adam Driver because even though he’s clearly muscular he didn’t have ridiculously toned abs in that one shirtless scene from TLJ because heaven forbid he decided not to deprive his body of vital nutrients just to look like a Greek sculpture? Oh! And remember that dumb take about Jason Momoa “letting himself go“ and “having a dad bod“ because of that one candid beach picture where he had his normal healthy layer fat instead of his toned GoT physique? Good times.

iamcon-fu-sion: archivistofnerddom: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchge...

Several: lustyloveylady: I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction
Several: lustyloveylady:
I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction

lustyloveylady: I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction

Several: bogleech: cazort: marvelousgameofdisneythrones: pangur-and-grim: my favourite part of the Evolutionary Biology courses I took at the University of Toronto was learning that several bird species have 3+ sexes? the ruff bird is a great example - each male variant has a different (and successful!) reproductive strategy, and a different chromosomal sequence. unlike the ruff bird, human sex falls into a bimodal distribution - this means there are two strong peaks (”typical” male and female morphs), with a whole lot in between. evolution is nice way of saying “statistics played out longterm among living organisms”, and evolutionarily successful traits….aren’t something to hold up as natural or moral, or representative of an advanced state. it’s literally just fuck tactics that make your group size increase. (though fucking isn’t always the best route, as asexual reproduction is massively advantageous as a short-term strategy, and certain species dominate the landscape by switching between sexual/asexual depending on environmental conditions) besides all that, the strength of humankind has always been our ability to work together communally, and that’s straight science. so even if you went down the extremely problematic path of valuing fellow humans based on their potential evolutionary contribution (coughs, eugenics, coughs), there would still be zero scientific basis behind discriminating against trans, non-binary and intersex people.  tl;dr here’s a challenge to all the bigots out there: please stop using “science” as a defence when the actual science is (overwhelmingly) against you. Science: pissing off bigots of all kinds since its inception. I find White-throated sparrows fascinating. They have two color morphs, the bright one: And the drab one: The two morphs have very different behavior. The bright ones are more aggressive, setting up territories and defending them, being more aggressive about defending against predators. They sing more often. The dull ones are quieter and less aggressive. They are more attentive to the nest, and better at feeding nestlings. The morphs tend to make a good pairing for raising children because they specialize in different roles. The dull-colored birds, being more camouflaged, are safer when sitting on the nest, and are better able to hide. The bright-colored birds, being more visible, are better able to intimidate predators and rivals. Interestingly though, both color morphs occur in both female and male birds. And birds tend to pair up with both opposite sex and opposite color morph birds. The dimorphism and different roles that, in most birds, are strongly associated with biological sex, in this species has evolved to be abstracted and separated from biological sex. Some people have described this system as the birds having “four sexes”. It’s been proposed that some life may have only first split into multiple sexes in order to confuse or slow down parasites so maybe some folks get offended cause deep down they just think roundworms will get them
Several: bogleech:

cazort:

marvelousgameofdisneythrones:

pangur-and-grim:

my favourite part of the Evolutionary Biology courses I took at the University of Toronto was learning that several bird species have 3+ sexes? the ruff bird is a great example - each male variant has a different (and successful!) reproductive strategy, and a different chromosomal sequence.
unlike the ruff bird, human sex falls into a bimodal distribution - this means there are two strong peaks (”typical” male and female morphs), with a whole lot in between.
evolution is nice way of saying “statistics played out longterm among living organisms”, and evolutionarily successful traits….aren’t something to hold up as natural or moral, or representative of an advanced state. it’s literally just fuck tactics that make your group size increase.
(though fucking isn’t always the best route, as asexual reproduction is massively advantageous as a short-term strategy, and certain species dominate the landscape by switching between sexual/asexual depending on environmental conditions)
besides all that, the strength of humankind has always been our ability to work together communally, and that’s straight science. so even if you went down the extremely problematic path of valuing fellow humans based on their potential evolutionary contribution (coughs, eugenics, coughs), there would still be zero scientific basis behind discriminating against trans, non-binary and intersex people. 
tl;dr here’s a challenge to all the bigots out there: please stop using “science” as a defence when the actual science is (overwhelmingly) against you.

Science: pissing off bigots of all kinds since its inception.

I find White-throated sparrows fascinating. They have two color morphs, the bright one:
And the drab one:
The two morphs have very different behavior. The bright ones are more aggressive, setting up territories and defending them, being more aggressive about defending against predators. They sing more often.
The dull ones are quieter and less aggressive. They are more attentive to the nest, and better at feeding nestlings.
The morphs tend to make a good pairing for raising children because they specialize in different roles. The dull-colored birds, being more camouflaged, are safer when sitting on the nest, and are better able to hide. The bright-colored birds, being more visible, are better able to intimidate predators and rivals.
Interestingly though, both color morphs occur in both female and male birds. And birds tend to pair up with both opposite sex and opposite color morph birds. The dimorphism and different roles that, in most birds, are strongly associated with biological sex, in this species has evolved to be abstracted and separated from biological sex.
Some people have described this system as the birds having “four sexes”.



It’s been proposed that some life may have only first split into multiple sexes in order to confuse or slow down parasites so maybe some folks get offended cause deep down they just think roundworms will get them

bogleech: cazort: marvelousgameofdisneythrones: pangur-and-grim: my favourite part of the Evolutionary Biology courses I took at the...

Several: lustyloveylady: I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction
Several: lustyloveylady:
I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction

lustyloveylady: I have watched this several times and I will never tire of his reaction

Several: Been in this grocery store several times and just noticed the sign today.
Several: Been in this grocery store several times and just noticed the sign today.

Been in this grocery store several times and just noticed the sign today.

Several: TikTok danojok86 JTikTok @snejok86 feniczoroark: injuries-in-dust: sewickedthread: coredesignixandnekonee: the-real-numbers: ilfaitdusoleil: bigwordsandsharpedges: Ball lightning is a rare electrical phenomenon. Scientists aren’t certain what creates it, and once disputed that ball lighning existed at all. Some argued that it was simply the electromagnetic field of an electrical storm causing visual hallucinations by exciting neurons in the brain, an effect called transcranial magnetic stimulation. However, recent high-definition video proved that at least some instances must be a real physical effect. Spectrograpic analysis of this images suggests that ball lightning is made of vaporized silicon contained within a self-contained electromagnetic bubble, effectively making a naturally occurring electric arc lamp. Laboratory experiments successfully replicated the glowing ball of plasma, which hovered for several seconds. Unfortunately, other lab experiments create similar visual effects using wildly different methods, including electrically-excited nanoparticles, water shocked by capacitors to simulate lightning, and a bubble of ionized gas fuelled for many seconds by a vast atmospheric energy field. The varying size of that energy-pumping field would conveniently explain the unpredictable size, duration, and electrical power levels observed in ball lightning. So we’re still not sure what that thing in the video really is, but it may be possible to create something like that in a dozen different ways. I would lose my mind like a 15th century peasant if I saw this walking down the street Me crossing the street Willow wisps? Joe Baldwin, is that you? Some historical instances of seeing g angels are now believed to have been ancient people encountering ball lighting. Don’t move, don’t shoot it, stay against the wall Artjom don’t move.
Several: TikTok
 danojok86

 JTikTok
 @snejok86
feniczoroark:

injuries-in-dust:

sewickedthread:

coredesignixandnekonee:
the-real-numbers:

ilfaitdusoleil:

bigwordsandsharpedges:


Ball lightning is a rare electrical phenomenon. Scientists aren’t certain what creates it, and once disputed that ball lighning existed at all. Some argued that it was simply the electromagnetic field of an electrical storm causing visual hallucinations by exciting neurons in the brain, an effect called transcranial magnetic stimulation. 
However, recent high-definition video proved that at least some instances must be a real physical effect. Spectrograpic analysis of this images suggests that ball lightning is made of vaporized silicon contained within a self-contained electromagnetic bubble, effectively making a naturally occurring electric arc lamp. 
Laboratory experiments successfully replicated the glowing ball of plasma, which hovered for several seconds. 
Unfortunately, other lab experiments create similar visual effects using wildly different methods, including electrically-excited nanoparticles, water shocked by capacitors to simulate lightning, and a bubble of ionized gas fuelled for many seconds by a vast atmospheric energy field. 
The varying size of that energy-pumping field would conveniently explain the unpredictable size, duration, and electrical power levels observed in ball lightning.
So we’re still not sure what that thing in the video really is, but it may be possible to create something like that in a dozen different ways. 



I would lose my mind like a 15th century peasant if I saw this walking down the street 



Me crossing the street



Willow wisps?

Joe Baldwin, is that you?


Some historical instances of seeing g angels are now believed to have been ancient people encountering ball lighting.


Don’t move, don’t shoot it, stay against the wall


Artjom don’t move.

feniczoroark: injuries-in-dust: sewickedthread: coredesignixandnekonee: the-real-numbers: ilfaitdusoleil: bigwordsandsharpedges: B...

Several: +) R.i.P So y'all remember when SpongeBob killed at least several dozen people in a helicopter accident or just me?
Several: +)
 R.i.P
So y'all remember when SpongeBob killed at least several dozen people in a helicopter accident or just me?

So y'all remember when SpongeBob killed at least several dozen people in a helicopter accident or just me?

Several: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Bruce Lee Was My Friend, and Tarantino's Movie Disrespects Him 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Alamy Stock Photo Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Bruce Lee during the filming of 1978's 'Game of Death.' solacekames: 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial arts star, believes the filmmaker was sloppy, somewhat racist and shirked his responsibility to basic truth in ‘Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.’Remember that time Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. kidney-punched a waiter for serving soggy croutons in his tomato soup? How about the time the Dalai Lama got wasted and spray-painted “Karma Is a Beach” on the Tibetan ambassador’s limo? Probably not, since they never happened. But they could happen if a filmmaker decides to write those scenes into his or her movie. And, even though we know the movie is fiction, those scenes will live on in our shared cultural conscience as impressions of those real people, thereby corrupting our memory of them built on their real-life actions.That’s why filmmakers have a responsibility when playing with people’s perceptions of admired historic people to maintain a basic truth about the content of their character. Quentin Tarantino’s portrayal of Bruce Lee in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood does not live up to this standard. Of course, Tarantino has the artistic right to portray Bruce any way he wants. But to do so in such a sloppy and somewhat racist way is a failure both as an artist and as a human being.This controversy has left me torn. Tarantino is one of my favorite filmmakers because he is so bold, uncompromising and unpredictable. There’s a giddy energy in his movies of someone who loves movies and wants you to love them, too. I attend each Tarantino film as if it were an event, knowing that his distillation of the ’60s and ’70s action movies will be much more entertaining than a simple homage. That’s what makes the Bruce Lee scenes so disappointing, not so much on a factual basis, but as a lapse of cultural awareness.Bruce Lee was my friend and teacher. That doesn’t give him a free pass for how he’s portrayed in movies. But it does give me some insight into the man. I first met Bruce when I was a student at UCLA looking to continue my martial arts studies, which I started in New York City. We quickly developed a friendship as well as a student-teacher relationship. He taught me the discipline and spirituality of martial arts, which was greatly responsible for me being able to play competitively in the NBA for 20 years with very few injuries.During our years of friendship, he spoke passionately about how frustrated he was with the stereotypical representation of Asians in film and TV. The only roles were for inscrutable villains or bowing servants. In Have Gun - Will Travel, Paladin’s faithful Chinese servant goes by the insulting name of “Hey Boy” (Kam Tong). He was replaced in season four by a female character referred to as “Hey Girl” (Lisa Lu). Asian men were portrayed as sexless accessories to a scene, while the women were subservient. This was how African-American men and women were generally portrayed until the advent of Sidney Poitier and blaxploitation films. Bruce was dedicated to changing the dismissive image of Asians through his acting, writing and promotion of Jeet Kune Do, his interpretation of martial arts.That’s why it disturbs me that Tarantino chose to portray Bruce in such a one-dimensional way. The John Wayne machismo attitude of Cliff (Brad Pitt), an aging stuntman who defeats the arrogant, uppity Chinese guy harks back to the very stereotypes Bruce was trying to dismantle. Of course the blond, white beefcake American can beat your fancy Asian chopsocky dude because that foreign crap doesn’t fly here.I might even go along with the skewered version of Bruce if that wasn’t the only significant scene with him, if we’d also seen a glimpse of his other traits, of his struggle to be taken seriously in Hollywood. Alas, he was just another Hey Boy prop to the scene. The scene is complicated by being presented as a flashback, but in a way that could suggest the stuntman’s memory is cartoonishly biased in his favor. Equally disturbing is the unresolved shadow that Cliff may have killed his wife with a spear gun because she nagged him. Classic Cliff. Is Cliff more heroic because he also doesn’t put up with outspoken women?I was in public with Bruce several times when some random jerk would loudly challenge Bruce to a fight. He always politely declined and moved on. First rule of Bruce’s fight club was don’t fight — unless there is no other option. He felt no need to prove himself. He knew who he was and that the real fight wasn’t on the mat, it was on the screen in creating opportunities for Asians to be seen as more than grinning stereotypes. Unfortunately, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood prefers the good old ways.
Several: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Bruce
 Lee Was My Friend, and
 Tarantino's Movie Disrespects
 Him
 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
 Alamy Stock Photo
 Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Bruce Lee during the filming of 1978's 'Game of Death.'
solacekames:

8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial arts star, believes the filmmaker was sloppy, somewhat racist and shirked his responsibility to basic truth in ‘Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.’Remember that time Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. kidney-punched a waiter for serving soggy croutons in his tomato soup? How about the time the Dalai Lama got wasted and spray-painted “Karma Is a Beach” on the Tibetan ambassador’s limo? Probably not, since they never happened. But they could happen if a filmmaker decides to write those scenes into his or her movie. And, even though we know the movie is fiction, those scenes will live on in our shared cultural conscience as impressions of those real people, thereby corrupting our memory of them built on their real-life actions.That’s why filmmakers have a responsibility when playing with people’s perceptions of admired historic people to maintain a basic truth about the content of their character. Quentin Tarantino’s portrayal of Bruce Lee in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood does not live up to this standard. Of course, Tarantino has the artistic right to portray Bruce any way he wants. But to do so in such a sloppy and somewhat racist way is a failure both as an artist and as a human being.This controversy has left me torn. Tarantino is one of my favorite filmmakers because he is so bold, uncompromising and unpredictable. There’s a giddy energy in his movies of someone who loves movies and wants you to love them, too. I attend each Tarantino film as if it were an event, knowing that his distillation of the ’60s and ’70s action movies will be much more entertaining than a simple homage. That’s what makes the Bruce Lee scenes so disappointing, not so much on a factual basis, but as a lapse of cultural awareness.Bruce Lee was my friend and teacher. That doesn’t give him a free pass for how he’s portrayed in movies. But it does give me some insight into the man. I first met Bruce when I was a student at UCLA looking to continue my martial arts studies, which I started in New York City. We quickly developed a friendship as well as a student-teacher relationship. He taught me the discipline and spirituality of martial arts, which was greatly responsible for me being able to play competitively in the NBA for 20 years with very few injuries.During our years of friendship, he spoke passionately about how frustrated he was with the stereotypical representation of Asians in film and TV. The only roles were for inscrutable villains or bowing servants. In Have Gun - Will Travel, Paladin’s faithful Chinese servant goes by the insulting name of “Hey Boy” (Kam Tong). He was replaced in season four by a female character referred to as “Hey Girl” (Lisa Lu). Asian men were portrayed as sexless accessories to a scene, while the women were subservient. This was how African-American men and women were generally portrayed until the advent of Sidney Poitier and blaxploitation films. Bruce was dedicated to changing the dismissive image of Asians through his acting, writing and promotion of Jeet Kune Do, his interpretation of martial arts.That’s why it disturbs me that Tarantino chose to portray Bruce in such a one-dimensional way. The John Wayne machismo attitude of Cliff (Brad Pitt), an aging stuntman who defeats the arrogant, uppity Chinese guy harks back to the very stereotypes Bruce was trying to dismantle. Of course the blond, white beefcake American can beat your fancy Asian chopsocky dude because that foreign crap doesn’t fly here.I might even go along with the skewered version of Bruce if that wasn’t the only significant scene with him, if we’d also seen a glimpse of his other traits, of his struggle to be taken seriously in Hollywood. Alas, he was just another Hey Boy prop to the scene. The scene is complicated by being presented as a flashback, but in a way that could suggest the stuntman’s memory is cartoonishly biased in his favor. Equally disturbing is the unresolved shadow that Cliff may have killed his wife with a spear gun because she nagged him. Classic Cliff. Is Cliff more heroic because he also doesn’t put up with outspoken women?I was in public with Bruce several times when some random jerk would loudly challenge Bruce to a fight. He always politely declined and moved on. First rule of Bruce’s fight club was don’t fight — unless there is no other option. He felt no need to prove himself. He knew who he was and that the real fight wasn’t on the mat, it was on the screen in creating opportunities for Asians to be seen as more than grinning stereotypes. Unfortunately, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood prefers the good old ways.

solacekames: 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial ar...

Several: Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRRomeo I just had such an affirming experience. On my 8hr intl flight back from a conference, I sat next to a father/son. In broken English, the father began to apologize/ warn me that his ~10 yr-old son had severe nonverbal autism, and that this would like be a difficult journey. 1/ 2:59 p.m. 28 Aug. 19 Twitter Web App 41.3K Retweets 178K Likes Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h Replying to @Rachel RRomeo I told him not to worry, I was a speech-language pathologist with lots of experience with minimally verbal kiddos. Challenging behaviors began even before take off: screaming, hitting me, and grabbing for my things. The father repeatedly apologized, but did little else 2/ t 813 19.2K 55 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR...18h I asked him how his son preferred to communicate. He didn't seem to understand. Perhaps this was a language barrier, but I think instead the child had very little experience with communication therapy. I put away the talk I was working on & asked if I could try. He nodded. 3/ 11 L 705 18.1K Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h I tried to see if he was stimulable for a communication board. I started by pulling up some standard images for basic nouns on my computer but I could tell that screens really bothered him. So I summoned my god-awful drawing skills and tried to create a (very!) low-tech board. 4/ 1680 13 18.3K Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h And by god, it clicked. I made symbols for the things he was favorite stuffed penguin, and for his dad. He took to it very quickly. I introduced way more symbols that I normally would, but hey, how often do we get an 8-hour session?! 5/ grabbing, for his Li 768 20 22.6K Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h By the end of the flight, he had made several requests, initiated several times, & his behaviors had reduced quite a bit. The father was astounded clearly no one had ever tried an AAC approach with him. I gave him the paper & showed him how to use it, and he nearly cried. 6/ 1992 105 28.5K Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h This was the human desire for communication, pure and simple. To connect with another person and share a thought. Communication is a basic human right, and I was overjoyed to help someone find it. What a privilege and a gift. 7/ t 2,713 48.5K 172 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h As I face the upcoming job cycle and the nearly endless imposter syndrome of academia, this was precisely the reminder I needed about why l love studying language/communication development. It was a good day to be an #SLP ! 8/8 2,387 2,987 94K
Several: Rachel R. Romeo
 @RachelRRomeo
 I just had such an affirming
 experience. On my 8hr intl flight
 back from a conference, I sat next
 to a father/son. In broken English,
 the father began to apologize/
 warn me that his ~10 yr-old son
 had severe nonverbal autism, and
 that this would like be a difficult
 journey. 1/
 2:59 p.m. 28 Aug. 19 Twitter Web App
 41.3K Retweets 178K Likes
 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 Replying to @Rachel RRomeo
 I told him not to worry, I was a
 speech-language pathologist with lots of
 experience with minimally verbal kiddos.
 Challenging behaviors began even
 before take off: screaming, hitting me,
 and grabbing for my things. The father
 repeatedly apologized, but did little else
 2/
 t 813
 19.2K
 55

 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR...18h
 I asked him how his son preferred to
 communicate. He didn't seem to
 understand. Perhaps this was a
 language barrier, but I think instead the
 child had very little experience with
 communication therapy. I put away the
 talk I was working on & asked if I could
 try. He nodded. 3/
 11
 L 705
 18.1K
 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 I tried to see if he was stimulable for a
 communication board. I started by
 pulling up some standard images for
 basic nouns on my computer but I could
 tell that screens really bothered him. So I
 summoned my god-awful drawing skills
 and tried to create a (very!) low-tech
 board. 4/
 1680
 13
 18.3K
 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 And by god, it clicked. I made symbols
 for the things he was
 favorite stuffed penguin, and for his dad.
 He took to it very quickly. I introduced
 way more symbols that I normally would,
 but hey, how often do we get an 8-hour
 session?! 5/
 grabbing, for his
 Li 768
 20
 22.6K

 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 By the end of the flight, he had made
 several requests, initiated several times,
 & his behaviors had reduced quite a bit.
 The father was astounded clearly no
 one had ever tried an AAC approach with
 him. I gave him the paper & showed him
 how to use it, and he nearly cried. 6/
 1992
 105
 28.5K
 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 This was the human desire for
 communication, pure and simple. To
 connect with another person and share a
 thought. Communication is a basic
 human right, and I was overjoyed to help
 someone find it. What a privilege and a
 gift. 7/
 t 2,713 48.5K
 172
 Rachel R. Romeo @RachelRR... 18h
 As I face the upcoming job cycle and the
 nearly endless imposter syndrome of
 academia, this was precisely the
 reminder I needed about why l love
 studying language/communication
 development. It was a good day to be an
 #SLP ! 8/8
 2,387 2,987
 94K
Several: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Several: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

Several: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Several: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

Several: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Several: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
Several: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

Several: What should I absolutely not do when visiting the USA? Charlie Knoles, I have lived in 5 countries and am an Aussie expat in the USA Answered 2d ago + Don't get out of your car ifyou get pulled over by police. I was pulled over by a police officer while driving in Iowa. It was one week afterI had arrived in the USA for the first time. I had accidentally made a minor mistake disobeying a traffic sign. Back home in Australia it's considered polite to get out of your car and walk over to the police officer's car and hand him your license so he doesn't have to get out of his seat. I wanted to be extra polite so I immediately jumped out of my car and walked towards his car while reaching into my back pocket. I'm lucky to be alive. If you come from a gun-free country like the UK or Australia you don't have any natural instinct for gun culture. You don't realize that police assume that everyone is armed. Things got immediately serious. The police officer's hand went to his weapon and I responded by dropping to my knees with my hands up. He yelled a bunch of things at me but my memory is vague because my heartbeat was suddenly pulsing in my ears blotting out all sound. I don't know if he drew his weapon or not. I was staring intently at the ground, shaking and trying to project non- threatening vibes. My next memory is that there were three police cars around me and a bunch of cops who'd been called for backup. They were all keeping their hands close to their guns. After some time passed (a minute? 30 minutes?I have no idea) the tensions de-escalated and they told me to get up. I gave the officer my license and tried to explain why I'd approached him. It was completely incomprehensible to him that there was a place where people don't fear cops and vice versa at traffic stops. It was as though I was trying to tell him that I came from Narnia and our cops were all talking animals. I've spoken to several British people, New Zealanders, and Australians who have shared almost identical stories. They really need to put signs up in all major US airports. Don't get out of your car if stopped by police. They will assume you are armed and they might shoot you. fierceawakening: adelmortescryche: Reblogging for other diasporic and expat folk. Especially non-caucasian diasporic and expat folk. Some things change when you shift countries. Keep the changes in mind. Whenever I see this I wonder what the gun guys think about it.
Several: What should I absolutely not do when visiting the USA?
 Charlie Knoles, I have lived in 5 countries and am an Aussie expat in
 the USA
 Answered 2d ago
 +
 Don't get out of your car ifyou get pulled over by police.
 I was pulled over by a police officer while driving in Iowa. It was one week afterI
 had arrived in the USA for the first time. I had accidentally made a minor
 mistake disobeying a traffic sign. Back home in Australia it's considered polite to
 get out of your car and walk over to the police officer's car and hand him your
 license so he doesn't have to get out of his seat. I wanted to be extra polite so I
 immediately jumped out of my car and walked towards his car while reaching
 into my back pocket.
 I'm lucky to be alive.
 If you come from a gun-free country like the UK or Australia you don't have any
 natural instinct for gun culture. You don't realize that police assume that
 everyone is armed.
 Things got immediately serious. The police officer's hand went to his weapon
 and I responded by dropping to my knees with my hands up. He yelled a bunch
 of things at me but my memory is vague because my heartbeat was suddenly
 pulsing in my ears blotting out all sound. I don't know if he drew his weapon or
 not. I was staring intently at the ground, shaking and trying to project non-
 threatening vibes. My next memory is that there were three police cars around
 me and a bunch of cops who'd been called for backup. They were all keeping
 their hands close to their guns. After some time passed (a minute? 30 minutes?I
 have no idea) the tensions de-escalated and they told me to get up. I gave the
 officer my license and tried to explain why I'd approached him. It was completely
 incomprehensible to him that there was a place where people don't fear cops and
 vice versa at traffic stops. It was as though I was trying to tell him that I came
 from Narnia and our cops were all talking animals.
 I've spoken to several British people, New Zealanders, and Australians who have
 shared almost identical stories. They really need to put signs up in all major US
 airports.
 Don't get out of your car if stopped by police. They will assume you are
 armed and they might shoot you.
fierceawakening:
adelmortescryche:
Reblogging for other diasporic and expat folk. Especially non-caucasian diasporic and expat folk. Some things change when you shift countries. Keep the changes in mind. 

Whenever I see this I wonder what the gun guys think about it.

fierceawakening: adelmortescryche: Reblogging for other diasporic and expat folk. Especially non-caucasian diasporic and expat folk. Some...

Several: Suihisonian CHANNEL flicker-serthes: sebastianmichaelisthedevilwithin: wortlby2: germanamericanslavic: Colorized footage of the legendary Annie Oakley speed shooting with her Winchester rifle, November 1, 1894 “When a man hits a target, they call him a marksman. When I hit a target, they call it a trick. Never did like that much.” - Annie Oakley Idk who Annie Oakley is, but she’s so cool! Annie Oakley was. BEAST of a marksman. When she was fifteen, she went head-to-head in a shooting contest with a prize of $100, against a travelling exhibition marksman (Frank Butler). She beat him handily, and won the $100 (equivalent to over $2000 today). Please note that it was a shot-for-shot match, and he lost on the TWENTY-FIFTH clay pigeon (so it was a moving target, too). Twenty-five shots in a row, Annie hit them ALL. This, understandably, resulted in Frank, who drank his respect women juice, to be like “Wow that is super hot and I’m in love.” They ended up getting married pretty soon after that, but didn’t have any kids (but IMAGINE IF THEY DID. A FAMILY OF SHARPSHOOTERS). Some of her “trick” shooting (in other words, absolute badass nearly impossible shots given the sights on guns at the time and such) included: Splitting a playing card clean in half from thirty paces while it was place on its edge. Taking off the burning end of a cigarette placed in her husband’s mouth, from thirty+ paces. Having someone throw a DIME into the air, and shooting it clean through. She was lauded by Chief Sitting Bull for her marksmanship when he saw her blow out a candle with one shot, without damaging the wick or the candle itself. Into her sixties, she continued breaking records as well as being a vocal women’s rights activist. She, in her later years, shot 100 clay pigeons in a row from 15 meters. She died in 1915, and her husband was so consumed by grief that he stopped eating and died 18 days later because he couldn’t stand to be apart from her. After her death it was discovered that her ENTIRE fortune (a tidy amount) had been secretly given to several charities, women’s rights groups, and her family in the last few months of her life. She was legendary, and received numerous titles to go along with her abilities, but my favorite is definitely Annie Oakley, Little Sureshot of the West.
Several: Suihisonian
 CHANNEL
flicker-serthes:

sebastianmichaelisthedevilwithin:


wortlby2:

germanamericanslavic:
Colorized footage of the legendary Annie Oakley speed shooting with her Winchester rifle, November 1, 1894

“When a man hits a target, they call 
him a marksman. When I hit a target, they call it a trick. Never did 
like that much.” - Annie Oakley




Idk who Annie Oakley is, but she’s so cool! 


Annie Oakley was. BEAST of a marksman.

When she was fifteen, she went head-to-head in a shooting contest with a prize of $100, against a travelling exhibition marksman (Frank Butler). She beat him handily, and won the $100 (equivalent to over $2000 today). Please note that it was a shot-for-shot match, and he lost on the TWENTY-FIFTH clay pigeon (so it was a moving target, too). Twenty-five shots in a row, Annie hit them ALL.

This, understandably, resulted in Frank, who drank his respect women juice, to be like “Wow that is super hot and I’m in love.” They ended up getting married pretty soon after that, but didn’t have any kids (but IMAGINE IF THEY DID. A FAMILY OF SHARPSHOOTERS).

Some of her “trick” shooting (in other words, absolute badass nearly impossible shots given the sights on guns at the time and such) included:

Splitting a playing card clean in half from thirty paces while it was place on its edge.

Taking off the burning end of a cigarette placed in her husband’s mouth, from thirty+ paces.

Having someone throw a DIME into the air, and shooting it clean through.

She was lauded by Chief Sitting Bull for her marksmanship when he saw her blow out a candle with one shot, without damaging the wick or the candle itself.

Into her sixties, she continued breaking records as well as being a vocal women’s rights activist. She, in her later years, shot 100 clay pigeons in a row from 15 meters.

She died in 1915, and her husband was so consumed by grief that he stopped eating and died 18 days later because he couldn’t stand to be apart from her.

After her death it was discovered that her ENTIRE fortune (a tidy amount) had been secretly given to several charities, women’s rights groups, and her family in the last few months of her life.

She was legendary, and received numerous titles to go along with her abilities, but my favorite is definitely Annie Oakley, Little Sureshot of the West.

flicker-serthes: sebastianmichaelisthedevilwithin: wortlby2: germanamericanslavic: Colorized footage of the legendary Annie Oakley sp...

Several: Dracovish - Water / Dragon-type Arctovish -Water / Ice-type IGN IGN Dracozolt -Electric / Dragon-type Arctozolt - Electic / Ice-type IGN IGN spacehippieface: girlfriendluvr: tsunflowers: why are these all so fucked up the fossil pokemon of this gen are inspired by several incidents in britain (and europe at large but mostly britain) where many fossils were put together completely wrong, resulting in shit like this being in actual museums. this particular one (the “otto von guerick unicorn”) is actually from germany, but it’s the funniest of them. see the crystal palace dinosaurs or the piltdown man for british examples in the game, you’re combining fossils from completely different extinct pokemon, resulting in these monstrosities that have dex entries like this: “Its mighty legs are capable of running at speeds exceeding 40 mph, but this Pokémon can’t breathe unless it’s underwater.“ “The shaking of its freezing upper half is what generates its electricity. It has a hard time walking around.“ “Though it’s able to capture prey by freezing its surroundings, it has trouble eating the prey afterward because its mouth is on top of its head.“ some of the 8 dex entries even speculate why these pokemon may have gone extinct, which is funny because they never existed in the first place. they’re chimeras that are exclusive to the pokemon universe’s modern times. the professor lady who puts the fossils together in the pokemon games is even named Cara Liss (careless) some people have made fanart of what the original pokemon may have looked like, here’s one, here’s another, and here’s a third!
Several: Dracovish - Water / Dragon-type
 Arctovish -Water / Ice-type
 IGN
 IGN
 Dracozolt -Electric / Dragon-type
 Arctozolt - Electic / Ice-type
 IGN
 IGN
spacehippieface:

girlfriendluvr:

tsunflowers:
why are these all so fucked up
the fossil pokemon of this gen are inspired by several incidents in britain (and europe at large but mostly britain) where many fossils were put together completely wrong, resulting in shit like this being in actual museums. this particular one (the “otto von guerick unicorn”) is actually from germany, but it’s the funniest of them. see the crystal palace dinosaurs or the piltdown man for british examples
in the game, you’re combining fossils from completely different extinct pokemon, resulting in these monstrosities that have dex entries like this:
“Its mighty legs are capable of running at speeds exceeding 40 mph, but this Pokémon can’t breathe unless it’s underwater.“
“The shaking of its freezing upper half is what generates its electricity. It has a hard time walking around.“
“Though it’s able to capture prey by freezing its surroundings, it has trouble eating the prey afterward because its mouth is on top of its head.“
some of the 8 dex entries even speculate why these pokemon may have gone extinct, which is funny because they never existed in the first place. they’re chimeras that are exclusive to the pokemon universe’s modern times.
the professor lady who puts the fossils together in the pokemon games is even named Cara Liss (careless)
some people have made fanart of what the original pokemon may have looked like, here’s one, here’s another, and here’s a third!

spacehippieface: girlfriendluvr: tsunflowers: why are these all so fucked up the fossil pokemon of this gen are inspired by several inc...

Several: yes its true Moscow ran out of vodka during the victory celebration of WWII, ao3tagoftheday: 186282397milespersec: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading “yes its true Moscow ran out of vodka during the victory celebration of WWII”] The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Please ask me about the Russian vodka ban in 1914? What was the Russian Vodka Ban in 1914? Ok, time to nerd. So Russians like vodka, ok? I don’t think this is a big revelation to anyone, but I feel like I should make it clear. Vodka is…important…in Russia.So, in 1904, Russia was preparing to go fight a war with Japan. Because, you know, sometimes you’re trying to retain control of a warm-water port and also there’s racism and then you need to have a war about it. So the Tsar orders his army to mobilize to go fight Japan, only there’s a problem: instead of mobilizing in an organized manner, soldiers are buying vodka and getting drunk out of their minds and then, like, not showing up for the war. Which, I mean, valid. I might get drunk and not show up if someone told me I had to go fight a war, and I don’t even drink. But it was a problem, and it actually really messed up Russia’s mobilization plans.So 1914 rolls around, and the Russians are going to go to war with Austria. Because, you know, sometimes international tensions in a multipolar situation get really heightened and then some asshole in an ugly uniform gets shot and then you need to have a war about it. So the Tsar orders his army to mobilize to go fight Austria, and this time, he has a plan. Vodka will not defeat him! He bans the sale of vodka in Russia. All of it. First for the duration of the mobilization period, and then for the duration of the war. Great idea, right?Only there’s a problem. The reason the Tsar can just stop all vodka sales with a snap of his fingers is that the Tsar sells all the vodka. Vodka is a state monopoly. You literally can’t get vodka from anyone but the government. Which makes it very easy to ban, but, well….Remember how I said Russians really like vodka? I’m just gonna say it again: Russians really like vodka. Really, really like it. So it makes sense that, if you’re a government with chronic money problems, you might create a state monopoly on vodka sales in order to raise some cash. You might raise a lot of cash. A huge fucking ton of cash. Literally one third of the Russian government’s revenue came from selling vodka. One fucking third.Here’s another thing: Wars? They cost money. A lot of it. And if you’re the Russian state in, say, 1914, and you’re about to kick off WWI, it might behoove you to not literally eliminate a third of your fucking revenue with a snap of your fingers! I don’t think that’s such a hard idea to wrap your head around, but what the fuck do I know. But anyway, Russia had chronic money problems throughout the war and couldn’t outfit their soldiers or feed their people or any of that shit. Also there was a revolution and communism and such-like. The end.Anyway, this story has several morals and they are as follows:Getting drunk and not showing up for wars is a valid life choiceConsidering the possible effects of your policies before implementing them is important please do thatProhibition causes communism and therefore we should all buy as much alcohol as we can because we love god and america
Several: yes its true Moscow ran out of vodka during the victory celebration of WWII,
ao3tagoftheday:

186282397milespersec:

ao3tagoftheday:

[Image Description: Tag reading “yes its true Moscow ran out of vodka during the victory celebration of WWII”]

The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Please ask me about the Russian vodka ban in 1914? 

What was the Russian Vodka Ban in 1914?

Ok, time to nerd. So Russians like vodka, ok? I don’t think this is a big revelation to anyone, but I feel like I should make it clear. Vodka is…important…in Russia.So, in 1904, Russia was preparing to go fight a war with Japan. Because, you know, sometimes you’re trying to retain control of a warm-water port and also there’s racism and then you need to have a war about it. So the Tsar orders his army to mobilize to go fight Japan, only there’s a problem: instead of mobilizing in an organized manner, soldiers are buying vodka and getting drunk out of their minds and then, like, not showing up for the war. Which, I mean, valid. I might get drunk and not show up if someone told me I had to go fight a war, and I don’t even drink. But it was a problem, and it actually really messed up Russia’s mobilization plans.So 1914 rolls around, and the Russians are going to go to war with Austria. Because, you know, sometimes international tensions in a multipolar situation get really heightened and then some asshole in an ugly uniform gets shot and then you need to have a war about it. So the Tsar orders his army to mobilize to go fight Austria, and this time, he has a plan. Vodka will not defeat him! He bans the sale of vodka in Russia. All of it. First for the duration of the mobilization period, and then for the duration of the war. Great idea, right?Only there’s a problem. The reason the Tsar can just stop all vodka sales with a snap of his fingers is that the Tsar sells all the vodka. Vodka is a state monopoly. You literally can’t get vodka from anyone but the government. Which makes it very easy to ban, but, well….Remember how I said Russians really like vodka? I’m just gonna say it again: Russians really like vodka. Really, really like it. So it makes sense that, if you’re a government with chronic money problems, you might create a state monopoly on vodka sales in order to raise some cash. You might raise a lot of cash. A huge fucking ton of cash. Literally one third of the Russian government’s revenue came from selling vodka. One fucking third.Here’s another thing: Wars? They cost money. A lot of it. And if you’re the Russian state in, say, 1914, and you’re about to kick off WWI, it might behoove you to not literally eliminate a third of your fucking revenue with a snap of your fingers! I don’t think that’s such a hard idea to wrap your head around, but what the fuck do I know. But anyway, Russia had chronic money problems throughout the war and couldn’t outfit their soldiers or feed their people or any of that shit. Also there was a revolution and communism and such-like. The end.Anyway, this story has several morals and they are as follows:Getting drunk and not showing up for wars is a valid life choiceConsidering the possible effects of your policies before implementing them is important please do thatProhibition causes communism and therefore we should all buy as much alcohol as we can because we love god and america

ao3tagoftheday: 186282397milespersec: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading “yes its true Moscow ran out of vodka during the...

Several: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Several: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Several: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Several: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook