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Being Alone, Bad, and Blade: WHO WILL YOU SIDE WITH? YOU ARE AN ASTARTE, CALLED UPON BY THE EMPRESS TO ASSIST IN THE UNIFICATION OF HUMANITY IN THE GREAT CRUSADE! HOWEVER, UPON RECEIVING YOUR MISSION YOUR MIND IS FILLED WITH A SULTRY HAZE, WHISPERED PROMISES OF POWER, TECHNOLOGY, LUST, AND LOVE IT IS THE FORCES OF CHAOS ATTEMPTING TO SWAY YOU FROM YOUR PATH! SO WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE ASTARTE? TEMPLATE WILL YOU CARRY ONWARD TO BRING HUMANITY INTO A NEW AGE? WILL YOU FALL TO CHAOS? PLANET/RULING-BODY WARHAMMER-GAL WARHAMMER-GALS OR WILL YOU FORGE YOUR OWN PATH AND ALLIANCES, SIDING WITH THE STRANGE RACES THAT EXPAND THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY? THE QUESTION STILL STANDS SON OF MAN, WHO WILL YOU SIDE WITH? TITLE +PRO SPRITE +PRO +PRO -CON -CON STATS LOVE POWER ITEM/ABILITY LUST TECH LOVE/LUST ITEM/ABILITY POWER FETISH FETISH TECH ITEM/ABILITY DISLIKE "DESCRIPTION" RULES: 1. YOU CAN ONLY CHOOSE ONE FACTION 2.YOU BEGIN WITH (40) POINTS 3. ALL GALS AND ITEMS WITHIN YOUR FACTION COST HALF 4. IF A GAL IS BOUGHT ALL HER ITEMS ARE OBTAINED 5.ITEMS CAN BE BOUGHT SEPARATELY FROM THE GAL 6. IF NO PRICE IS LISTED, IT CAN'T BE BOUGHT 40 IMPERIUM OF MAN EMPRESS OF MANKIND IMMORTAL MONARCH +LITERALLY GLOWS WITH BEAUTY +COMMANDS ALL OF THE IMPERIUM +KNOWS ALL YOUR DESIRES, AND LOVES THEM +/-WANTS AT LEAST 18 CHILDREN, MAYBE MORE -WILL NEVER TELL YOU WHAT SHE IS PLANNING THE BURNING BLADE GUARANTEES A VICTORY AGAINST CHAOS HOLY LAURELS- GAIN ANOTHER HUMAN LOVER MISSIONARY THE GOLDEN THRONE EXPLORATION ACQUIRE AN ELDAR TECH GIFT INTERSPECIES "THE ALL POWERFUL HEAD OF THE IMPERIUM, SHE SEEKS A BETTER FUTURE FOR HUMANITY, PERHAPS WITH YOU BY HER SIDE? 25 THE MECHANICHUM OF MARS TECH PRIESTESS THE HALL OF JUDGEMENT IMPERIAL JUDGE ADEPTUS ARBITE ORDER OF OUR MARTYRED LADY SISTER OF BATTLE OFFICIO ASSASSINORUM OFFICIO PREFECTUS [DATA REDACTED ROGUE PSYKER EVERSOR ASSASSIN LORD COMMISSAR UNFLINCHING LEADER THE ONE WHO DESTROYS ADEPT MECHANIC DAUGHTER OF THE EMPRESS VOID BORN MUTANT +LOVES TO BE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION +UPHOLDS THE LAW +COMMANDS A SLEW OF IMPERIAL REGIMENTS +FULLY CUSTOMIZABLE +GOOD WITH HER "HANDS +CAN FIX JUST ABOUT ANYTHING +EAGER TO SHOW HER DEVOTION FOR YOU +HAS QUITE THE LOVELY SMILE +GOOD FOR MORALE +STANDS FIRM WITH HER DECISIONS +NOTHING WILL STOP HER FROM GETTING TO YOU +ISA ONE WOMAN ARMY +A SKILLED WARRIOR WITH BLADE AND BOLTER +KNOWS HER WAY AROUND THE STREETS +ABSOLUTELY NOTHING +ALWAYS PRISTINE AND ORGANIZED +HAS A LOT OF HOT SIBLINGS +SEEMS TO KNOW WHATS ON YOUR MIND -WON'T WAVER THE LAW FOR YOU -LIKES TO RAMBLE ABOUT RULES RATHER ATTACHED TO HER DRUGS -NOT MANY FLESHY BITS LEFT -RARELY LOWERS HER "WALL" -HIDES UNDER A WALL OF PRUDISHNESS -ALWAYS -HAS AN EXPLOSIVE PERSONALITY -GIVES YOU HEADACHES -THINKS SHE IS GETTING ON IN YEARS -HER FAITH MAKES HER A TAD CRAZY AT TIMES -TREATS YOU LIKE A DOOFUS PSYKER'S LEXICARNUM RIOT SHIELD BOLT PISTOL TITAN STC TEMPLATE SYNSKIN BODYGLOVE MANTLE OF SAINT OPHELIA POINT THIS AT FOE OR A FEARFUL ALLY TO ABSORBS MOST DAMAGE COMING FROM ACQUIRE PLANS TO MAKE A POWERFUL COLUSSUS, IT JUST NEEDS TO BE BUILT GRANTS THE USER COMMAND OVER THE SKIN TIGHT OUTFIT THAT AMPLIFIES YOUR OWN FLEXIBILITY TO ASTONISHING HEIGHTS CALL UPON AN ENTIRE ORDER OF DEVOUT IMMATERIUM RANGED AND MELEE ATTACKS ALIKE INSPIRE YOUR TROOPS. SISTERS TO ASSIST YOU ON YOUR CRUSADE NEURO GAUNTLET- IMPERIAL VERDICT JUNIOR JUDGE BADGE- SERVITOR HOLLOW NAILS SIMULACRUM IMPERIALIS ALLOWS YOU TO ISSUE LAW UNTO IMPERIAL USED TO "SUBDUE" OTHERS, MAKING THEM GAIN ONE GIRL FROM THE MILITARUM OF WITH THE LIGHEST TOUCH, A PERSONS SENSES BECOME SUPER-SENSTIVE. SHE WILL CREATE A PERSONAL SERVANT NEGATE ONE DOWNSIDE OF ANOTHER ITEM CITIZENS GIVING YOU MORE POWER YOUR CHOOSING FOR YOU TO DO ANY BIDDING YOU DESIRE PASSIVE AT THE COST OF PERSONALITY JUSTICE TAKING CHARGE STUN MAUL LOUD SEX TOYS ASTRONOMICON HAND HOLDING BLESSING OF THE OMNISIAH- ALL MECHNICAL OBJECTS ARE INCAPABLE OF BREAKING WHILE NEAR YOU CUDDLES MELTA BOMBS POWERFIST- THE BOOK OF ST. LUCIUS OBEDIENCE € HERESY BODY MODS BODILY FLUIDS THE LAW SCRATCHING WHEN SOMETHING IS IN YOUR WAY DIRTY THOUGHTS BDSM VARYING SETTINGS FROM TINGLY TO WITH A SINGLE PUNCH YOU CAN TAKE PREVENTS YOU AND OTHER PSYKERS PURIFY CHAOS TAINT, GAIN A PURE LOVER RULE BREAKING FOREPLAY PREMARITAL SEX KISSING EXTRA CRISPY ACCEPT NOTHING ELSE TO CLEAR THE WAY DOWN A CARNIFEX FROM BEING LOST TO THE WARP "A WELL ESTABLISHED LEADER TO MANY IMPERIAL VICTORIES,SHE REFUSES TO RETIRE HER BLADE BUT MAYBE YOU'LL BE THE ONE TO EASE HER UP." "WORKING THE BEAT IN A WRETCHED HIVE CITY, HER BRANCHES EFFICIENCY HAS HELPED TURN THE TIDE OF LAWLESSNESS, NOW SHE WISHES TO AID OTHER PLANETS." "RELEASED FROM HER CAGE WITH ONLY A LOOSE OBJECTIVE, SHE DESIRES NOTHING MORE THEN THE COMPLETE ANNIHILATION OF YOUR ENEMIES." "A RECENT MEMBER TO THE ORDER OF OUR MARTYRED LADY, THIS SISTER IS EAGER TO PROVE HER DEVOTION ALONGSIDE AN ASTARTES SUCH AS YOURSELF." "THE HIGH PRIESTESS OF MARS, SHE DOTES ON YOU IN AN ALMOST ZEALOT FASHION, THOUGH YOUR UNCERTAIN WHETHER THAT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE OR NOT. "A SANCTIONED PSYKER WORKING FOR THE ROGUE TRADERS, SHE SEEMS TO HAVE TAKEN A KEEN INTEREST IN YOU, OR WHATEVER IS GOING ON IN THAT HEAD OF YOURS. 12 12 14 15 TALLARN DESERT RAIDERS NECROMUNDA HIVE WORLD FELINID SPECIALIST CATS PAW TROOPER CATACHAN DEATH WORLD GREEN DEVIL ELITE CATACHAN JUNGLE FIGHTER LEAGUE OF EMBERG CADIAN SHOCK TROOP DEATH KORPS OF KRIEG SQUAT GUILDMASTER SPACE DWARF ENGINEER #8068 ROUGH RIDER ELITE DUNE SCORPION PLASMA GUNNER DAUNTLESS CLONE TROOPER SOLDIER OF THE IMPERIUM +COURAGEOUS WARRIOR GUILDMASTER THOSE THIGHS COULD CRUSH A WATERMELON +LAUGHS IN THE FACE OF DANGER EXCITED TO SHOW YOU HER TALENTS +PHYSICALLY AFFECTIONATE +HAS A COLLECTION OF FANTASTIC TALES +COMPLETELY FEARLESS +BRED TO "SERVE" +EVERY ACTION HERO ROLLED INTO ONE +TIMIDLY SNORTS WHEN SHE LAUGHS +NEVER QUESTIONS ORDERS GIVEN TO HER +CAN OUTDRINK ANYONE +SHORT EVEN AMONGST SQUATS +/-THAT GAP IN HER TEETH WHISTLES +WANTS A BIG FAMILY +CURIOUS TO LEARN ABOUT... FEELINGS +PURRS WHEN SHE IS PLEASED +A TRULY BRAVE SOLDIER -HER BROTHERS ARE EXTREMELY PROTECTIVE -TREATS YOU LIKE THE NEW GUY -ESCHEWS WEALTH AND GLORY -VIOLENT DRUNK -WILL SHRED YOUR FURNITURE -ALMOST SELF-DESTRUCTIVELY SO -KEEPS BRINGING YOU BLOODY TROPHIES -SMELLS A BIT LIKE SULPHUR -HONESTLY KIND OF NAIVE -VERY EMBARRESED WHEN NAKED -IS A TOTAL PUSSY -PROBALY GOING TO DIE TIGERS FELL CLAW A POWERFUL FELINID WEAPON, IT CAN SHEAR CLEAN THROUGH MOST THINGS CATACHAN FANG IMPERIAL INFANTRYMAN'S PRIMER REGIMENT'S WAR STANDARD SUPER HEAVY ARTILLERY BATTERY ORK SPORE ROTGUT IF GIVEN TO AN IMPERIAL SOLDIER THEY 20 INCHES OF GLEAMING STEEL, RENDS A OBTAIN 10 POWER POINTS TO SPEND ON CONSUMER BECOMES PASSIVE, THINGS APPEAR MUCH LARGER THEN THEY ARE REMOVE ONE THREAT FROM THE HISTORY VENUS MANTRAP WITH A SINGLE SWIPE WILL BE INSPIRED TO GREAT DEEDS MORE TROOPS FROM THE MILITARUM BOOKS ENGINEER # 8068 MASK WELL WORN RED BANDANA KITTY OBSCURA MUKAALI WARBEAST REINFORCED FLAK ARMOR DIRE AMASEC- A MASSIVE ANIMAL CAPABLE OF HAULING OTHER CATACHAN FIGHTERS ACCEPT YOU NEGATE ALL MORALE OR EMOTION BASED A POPULAR FELINID DRUG, IT SENDS ANY EASILY THE STRONGEST PROTECTION IN CONSUMER CAN SEE THROUGH GARMENTS YOU ACROSS EVEN THE HARSHEST TERRAIN THE GALAXY AS LONG AS YOU ARE FAITHFUL ISSUES WHILE WORN INTO THEIR TEAM, A TRUE HONOR FEMALE INTO A HEATED TIZZY HAIR PULLING BODY PAINT GENTLE SEX LICKING FRESH PAIR OF SOCKS ANCIENT ORDINATUS MAP- A MAP LEADING TO A WAR ENDING DEVICE JACKHAMMERING DNA SPLICER TAKING ORDERS EXO-ARMOUR BELT SUB BECOMES STUCK TO THE DOM'S GENITALS KORPS CLONE VATS M35 M-GALAXY SHORT PATTERN LASGUN OUTDOOR SEX FACE TOUCHING CHOKING DRUNKEN SEX COWGIRL EAR RUBS PRONE POSITION IMMENSELY POWERFUL AND ACCURATE CREATE YOUR OWN PERSONAL ARMY OF KRIEGERS AN ANCIENT RELIC USED TO CREATE YOU ARE GOING TO NEED THESE, AND SHE SHAVING CAT CALLING BOSSY PARTNERS PILLOW TALK COWARDICE BROUGHT A SPARE FOR YOU SOMEWHERE IN THE EXPANSIVE DESERT HALF ANIMAL ABHUMANS FEARFUL TO FOES OF THE IMPERIUM "A VETERAN OF HELLISH COMBAT CONDITIONS, SHE SEEMS TO COMPLETELY LACK AN OFF SWITCH, BUT VERY MUCH ENJOYS HAVING YOU AS A HUNTING BUDDY NONETHELESS. "FAMED FOR HER SKILLS ON HORSEBACK, SHE ONLY FEELS FREE WITH THE WIND BLOWING ACROSS HER FACE." "A NAMELESS SOLDIER, ONLY IDENTIFIED BY HER RED NECKERCHIEF. SHES QUIET, BUT YOU WOULDNT WANT ANYONE ELSE IN THAT FOX HOLE BESIDE YOU. "HER HOMEWORLD WAS DEVOURED BY TYRANIDS, AND HER ENTIRE RACE WAS SPLINTERED THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY. SHE DESIRES TO UNIFY HER PEOPLE. "A MEMBER OF THE RARE FELINE ABHUMANS, SHE HOPES TO PROVE HER PEOPLE ARE MORE THEN JUST EXOTIC NOVELTIES. "HER HOME RECENTLY DESTROYED, SHE LIVES AMONGST THE STARS IN A GIANT VESSEL, TASKED WITH PROTECTING ALL OF HUMANITY THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY." 10 15 16 10 TAU EMPIRE TRAVELING WARSPHERES HIVE FLEET BEHEMOTH OLD ONE EYE EVIL SUNZ THE OUTER REACH PLANET VESPID FIRE WARRIOR CADRE COMMANDÉR KROOT SHAPER VESPID STINGWING TAU AUXILIARY TROOPER GENESTEALER ORK WARBOSS WHITE FANG OILGUZZLER KINDRED MERCENARY STONEFIST CARNIFEX CORPORAPTOR HOMINIS +LEADS HER OWN WAAAGH +HYPER ADAPTIVE BODY +A CAREFREE AIRHEAD +A WALKING DERVISH OF BLADES +TRIES HER BEST TO BE A GOOD MATE +SMELLS LIKE BLUEBERRIES +CAN WORK ALONGSIDE ANY RACE +A GREAT CHEF TIMID FOR A CARNIFEX +LIKES TO PLAY CHASE +ONCE PUNCHED A SPACE BUG TO DEFF +GOOD WITH DIPLOMANCY +GREAT FLYER AND SCOUT +0DDLY CUDDLY +LOVES TO BE PHYSICAL +DA MOST BIGGEST GAL OF HER TRIBE +EAGER TO GAIN YOU AS AN ALLY +HAPPY TO CARRY YOU AROUND JUST DONT ASK ABOUT THE INGREDIENTS LACKS DEPTH PERCEPTION CRIES WHEN SHE IS ALONE THAT HAIR IS JUST A WEAVE -PREACHES SPACE COMMUNISM NON-STOP -MOSTLY SPEAKS IN SHRIEKS DARK SENSE OF HUMOR COMPLETE AND UTTER WEEB ACCIDENTALLY BREAKS THINGS IN HER WAY HER TEARS ARE ACID SHE WILL KRUMP YOUR PELVIS BOY -HAS REALLY ROUGH SKIN HOUND HORN MOLTED CARAPACE CHITIN CHUNK ADRENAL GLANDS MV52 SHIELD DRONE- WAAAAAAAAAAGH STICK CALL UPON A MASSIVE KROOT HOUND PACK TO DEVOUR YOUR ENEMIES BECOME UNABLE TO RUN OUT OF ENERGY DENSE AND THICK, THIS NATURAL ARMOR APROTOTYPE SHIELD DRONE THAT HAS A WHEN GROUND INTO A HOT BEVERAGE IT 9 GAIN AN UTTERLY MASSIVE ORK WARBAND CAN BE USED AS AN AMAZING SHIELD FOR A PROLONGED PERIOD SURPRISINGLY ACTIVE PERSONALITY BECOMES A POWERFUL APHRODISIAC AS WELL AS THIS ODDLY PHALLIC POLE LOVERS FEAST PHEROMONE TUBE THIS TUBE EMITS A SOFT FRAGRANT SCENT TOXIC SACS WAIFU WALL POSTER COMMUNION HELM- ADAPTING SPORES- AN OVER THE TOP PAINTING OF O'SHASERRA ALLOWS THE KROOT TO ADAPT MORE WHEN INJECTED ALL BODILY SENSES ARE WHEN WORN YOU ARE CAPABLE OF GAIN THE ABILITY TO MATE WITH ALL AMPLIFIED IMMENSELY FOR A SHORT TIME ABUNDANT FEATURES FOR HUMAN LOVERS THAT LURES WOMEN TO YOU THAT YOU CAN'T HELP BUT ADMIRE TALKING TO ANY RACE VIA TELEPATHY RACES OR EVEN INANIMATE OBJECTS BACKRUBS IMPREGNATION GOOD GENES WEAK MATES CLAW-PLAY ESKIMO KISSES KROOT GLANDS GIVES YOU THE ABILITY TO ADAPT BASED SLAVE-PLAY DOMINANCE RIPPER SWARMS MEGA CHOPPA DA SHINIEST SET OF WHEELS THIS SIDE OF DA GALAXY, AROUSES ALL DA ORK LADIES MESOPLARUM ARMOR- YMGARL MUTATION SEED- XV22 STEALTHSUIT PHEROMONES QUICKIES CUM ON WINGS VORE SMALL BOYZ CUMSHOTS A FRANTIC PACK OF TYRANID RIPPERS LIKES AND DISLIKES BECOME THAT OF A EXPERIMENTAL BATTLESUIT THAT USES RESIST ALL ENERGY BASED WEAPONS FOODPLAY WASTING FLUIDS CUDDLING ROUGH SEX ON WHAT YOU EAT SIMILAR TO THE KROOT ANOTHER PERSONS THAT WILL DO YOUR BIDDING CLOAKING TECHNOLOGY TO GO INVISIBLE WHEN WORN "LEADER TO HER OWN WARBAND, SHE AND HER WARRIORS SEEK TO BECOME THE PERFECT MATES FOR THEIR LOVERS THROUGH USE OF THEIR ADAPTIVE TRAITS. "FLOATING ALONE IN A SPACE HULK FOR WHO KNOWS HOW LONG, SHE DESIRES A MATE AND PURPOSE, WILL YOU HELP HER?" "AN ORK WHO GAINED HER TITLE THROUGH KRUMPING SKULLS. SHE WILL NOT ACCEPT THAT ANYONE COULD FEASIBLY BE STRONGER THAN HER. DARE YOU TRY? "A YOUNG FIRE SQUAD LEADER, THE PROSPECT OF GAINING YOU AS AN ALLY HAS HER OVERTLY EXCITED. "AFTER LEADING SEVERAL SUCCESSFUL MISSIONS, SHE WAS ALLOWED TO WORK ON HER OWN. SHE HAS DECIDED TO JOIN A NEW FORCE AND SEE WHAT THEY OFFER." "ABANDONED ON AN ICEWORLD, LONG LOST TO HER HIVE, SHE DUG HERSELF FREE FROM AN ICY PRISON. NOW SHE IS HUNGRY AND DETERMINED TO FIND A NEW HOME. 30 10 11 THE DARK CITY COMMORRAGH KABALITE WARRIOR 16 TOMBWORLD PAVONIS SAUTEKH DYNASTY ULTHWE CRAFTWORLD TALDEER THE OUTER REACH BIEL-TAN CRAFTWORLD THE NIGHT BRINGER CTAN SHARD SHADOWSEER NECRON WARRIOR МАCНA TOMB WORLD GUARDIAN HARLEQUIN MASQUE PLAYER SYBARITE OF THE BLACK HEART ELDAR FARSEER ELDAR FARSEER +A SUCKER FOR ATTENTION +INCREDIBLE ENDURANCE MOTHER WARNED YOU ABOUT GIRLS LIKE HER +INTO REAL KINKY SHIT +WRITES PASSIONATE LUSTY TALES FOR YOU +FLEXIBLE AS A RUBBER BAND +WIELDS POWERFUL PSYCHIC ABILITIES +IMMORTALITY IS PRETTY GREAT +FORGIVES YOU FOR ANY MISTAKE YOU MAKE +LIKES TO STICK HER NECK OUT FOR YOU +CAN PLAY THE ROLE OF JUST ABOUT ANYONE +A BEACON OF HOPE FOR HER PEOPLE +A TOTAL FLIRT +A LITERAL GOD-BEING +CUTE UNDER THAT MASK +HAPPY TO INDULGE YOU +ETERNALLY YOUNG AND SUPPLE +CLAIMS OF MANY SEXUAL EXPLOITS -DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THE WORD NO -THE WAY SHE HEALS IS A BIT CREEPY -IS NEVER GOING TO TAKE IT OFF -IS ACTUALLY A VIRGIN WITHERS AWAY IF SHES NOT HURTING THINGS -LIKES TO NAG YOU -NOT WHAT SHE USED TO BE -LIKES TO TAKE LONG NAPS -ALWAYS IN CHARACTER -YOU MAKE A DELIGHTFUL PINCUSHION ARROGANCE YOU CAN ONLY ADMIRE INSUFFERABLY SO ENTROPIC SCYTHE MIST STAVE A WEAPON THAT CHANNELS MENTAL FORCE TO CRUSH ARMOR AND BONES METAL BAND-AID SOUL STONE IF YOU PERISH WHILST WEARING THIS GEM GHOSTHELM SHADOW FIELD AT THE COST OF A LIFE YOU CAN REVIVE MAGNETIC AND FLEXIBLE, THIS ITEM FIXES CONCEALS YOUR MENTAL PRESENCE GAIN A PROTECTIVE BARRIER OF SHADOW ANOTHER PERSON. ANYTHING DAMAGED UNDERNEATH IT YOUR SOUL WILL BE RETAINED INSIDE IT FROM THE WARP AND MIST EVERFLOWING COWL CONCEALS THE FACIAL DETAILS OF ANYONE DOG-EARRED PLAY SCRIPT TWITCHY SCARAB VIBROBLADE CLEAVES THROUGH THE TOUGHEST ARMOR COMBAT DRUGS MACHA'S VIBROSWORD A CURIOUS SCARAB PET, IT SEEMS TO BE A HANDFULL OF STRANGE PILLS THAT HELP GAIN THE ABILITY TO UNDERSTAND SLIGHTLY USED, TALDEER DOESN'T LIKE HOLDING IT, BUT MAYBE YOU WILL WHO WEARS THIS BROKEN AND HUMS CONSTANTLY INTERPRETIVE DANCE FROM ANY RACE AMPLIFY PHYSICAL CAPABILITIES VIBRATING TENDERLY ALL THE WHILE EATING NECRODERMIS HEAD-PATS VOYEURISM GAUSS GUN PAIN PLAY THE PANACEA EDGING ACTUAL SEX EMBARASSMENT SWEET TALK FLIP BELT- STAFF OF ULTHAMAR RUNE ARMOUR RAPE-PLAY HAVE YOUR FLESH REPLACED WITH A CLANG-CLANG ROLEPLAY LATEX POWERFUL RIFLE THAT BREAKS DOWN WHILE WORN, YOU HAVE CONTROL OVER KISSING A POWERFUL PSYCHIC WEAPON, WILL HELP YOU GARNER RESPECT, EVEN WITH ELDAR A CURE FOR ALL KNOWN EARTHLY ELEGANT WRAITHBONE ARMOUR THAT ENSLAVEMENT MORNING SEX LIVING METAL THAT REPAIRS ITSELF CRITICS SLUTS ANYTHING IT HITS AT THE ATOMIC LEVEL GENTLE SEX YOUR OWN GRAVITY DISEASES DEFENDS YOU FROM PSYCHIC ATTACKS "A ONCE POWERFUL BEING THAT HUNGERS FOR ALL, SHE IS PLEASED WITH YOU FOR FREEING HER FROM HER BINDS, THOUGH YOU'RE UNCERTAIN IF IT WAS A GOOD IDEA." "ASLEEP FOR EONS, THIS WARRIOR HAS FINALLY AWOKEN. SHE IS EXCITED TO SEEWHAT SHE HASMISSED AND IS EAGER TO EXPLORE THE GALAXY AGAIN. "A SOLO TROUPE HARLEQUIN THAT TREATS YOU LIKE ANOTHER ACTOR IN HER OWN PERSONAL PLAY, THOUGH YOUR PART SEEMS TO BE THAT OF HER BELOVED. "LEFT ALONE ON A HELLISH WORLD BY HER COMPATRIOTS, SHE THOUGHT HER LIFE FORFEIT TILL YOU SAVED HER. NOW SHE'S BECOME QUITE ATTACHED TO YOU." "A DAUGHTER OF THE GREAT ELDRAD, EVER PLOTTING, EVEN AMONGST HER OWN PEOPLE, RARELY DO THEY KNOW HER OWN MACHINATIONS. "A DAUGHTER OF THE GREAT ELDRAD, SHE IS ONE OF THE MOST TALENTED FARSEERS BIEL-TAN, HO EVER HER DESPERATION FOR LOVE HINDERS HER FOCUS 40 11 11 11 11 CULT OF CHAOS UNDIVIDED CHAOS CULTIST CHILD OF CHAOS REALM OF DEATH AND DECA NURGLE GRANDMA NURGLE ABANDONED WARPSPACE GREAT SKULL THRONE KHORNE LADY OF RAGE KINGDOM OF PLEASURE SLAANESH SHE WHO THIRSTS THE CRYSTAL LABYRINTH MALAL TZEENTCH FORGOTTEN CHAOS GODDESS CHANGER OF WAYS THE "BELOVED" DAUGHTER OF CHAOS GODS +SEEKS TO RUIN THE OTHER CHAOS GODS +GOD OF SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK-N-ROLL +MAKES A MEAN SOUP LOVES PLAYING GAMES WITH YOU GODDESS OF BLOOD, WAR, AND MURDER INCREDIBLY OPTIMISTIC RARELY WORRIES ABOUT THINGS +DOESN'T ASK MUCH OF YOU +CURVACEOUS IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES INTO DOING EVERYTHING WITH YOU +WILL ALWAYS BE DIRECT WITH YOU A GREAT TEACHER +IMMORTAL VIA A POWERFUL NURGLE BLESSING HOTTEST THING IN EXISTENCE +/-SWITCHES FROM SUB TO DOM IN A SNAP +SURPRISINGLY EASY TO PLEASE +ALWAYS HAS A PLAN B SPAEKS IN HWA TUNGE OO KHAY-OS -INCREDIBLY RESTLESS -PLANS MAKE NO SENSE -PRANKSTER AT HEART BEING WITH HER OUSTS YOU FROM OTHERS -THAT ISN'T FAT -ALSO INTO SOME REALLY FREAKY STUFF NOT THE SHARPEST KNIFE IN THE DRAWER WHAT IS DOWN THERE?! A REAL BAD INFLUENCE -SPEAKS ONLY BY YELLING -GROSS ON A WHOLE NEW LEVEL DISC OF TZEENTCH- FORSAKEN AXE- HORN OF NURGLE THE CRIMSON SKULL CROWN BLADE OF THE LAER A RATHER PRETTY LOOKING SKULL A POSSESSED WEAPON INFUSED WITH PLAYING THIS HORN SUMMONS THE DEAD GAIN A DEMONIC ENTITY THAT CAN SOAR GAIN A RATHER UNHAPPY CHAMPION OF KHORNES FAVORITE SKULL, IF YOU HOLD IT SHE WILL LISTEN TO YOUR REQUESTS MARK OF KHORNE- WHEN SLAIN YOUR KILLER WILL SLOWLY DAEMONIC ENERGY THAT HEWS ANYTHING TO RISE AND FOLLOW YOUR ORDERS THE ETHERIC LEYLINES AS A MOUNT YOUR CHOOSING BLOOD OF SLAANESH TURN INTO YOU MARK OF NURGLE- MONOCHROME MASK MARK OF TZEENTCH- MARK OF SLAANESH GIVES YOU THE POWERS OF A DAEMON AND THE CULTIST ASCENDS TO PRINCEHOOD BECOME A MASTER OF ANY WEAPON YOU10 YOU ARE PROTECTED FROM WORLDY HARM ENDURE THE MOST GRIEVIOUS WOUNDS BECOME A MASTER OF THE SEXUAL ARTS10 MAKING YOU HER CHAMPION A TWISTED POWERFUL BODY TO MATCH WIELD IN YOUR HANDS AND PAINFUL STRIKES VIA AN INVISIBLE SHIELD oRe THE ENDLESS GRIMOIRE OF TZEENTCH GAIN A SINGLE FAVOR FROM A CHAOS GOD LOVE BITES TEASING EROTIC LIT INDIFFERENCE SURPRISES BLOOD-PLAY GORECHILD MANREAPER EVERYTHING SLOPPY KISSES DOOM GUITAR- THE BLACK BOOK THE BLACK STAFF RITUAL MATING CREATIVITY PRUDES WORSHIP PASSIONATE SEX BELLY RUBS A CORRUPT STAFF OF VAST POWER WHICH AMPLIFIES THE NOTES YOU STRUM TO A STRANGE BOOK THAT GIVES YOU DARK A BLESSED CHAINAXE THAT BECOMES COATED WITH VIRULENT DISEASES AND NEGLECT PLANNED SEX OF YOUR CHOOSING BOTTOMING BATHS THE POINT OF EXPLOSIVE SONIC ENERGY. KNOWLEDGE OF THE UNIVERSE FILTH THAT ROTS FLESH TO THE TOUCH MORE POWERFUL THE MORE YOU KILL GIVES ITS USER DEFT PSYCHIC ABILITIES "THE APPARENT DAUGHTER OF CHAOS, IT'S SAID SHE IS DESTINED FOR GREATNESS, ALTHOUGH SHE HAS YET TO SEEM SO GREAT." "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GODDESS! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE! "WAIT ARE YOU SERIOUS? YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE THE PRINCE OF PLEASURE?! WELL A CHALLENGE IS ALWAYS WELCOME, AND HE THINKS YOU ARE QUITE CUTE. "OF ALL THE GODS, SHE HOLDS THE CRUELEST SENSE OF HUMOR. HER LOVE OF RIDDLES, WORD PLAY, AND DRY WIT, TORMENTING OTHERS TO INSANITY. "WANDERING A LIFELESS VOID IN THE WARP, THIS UNREMEMBERED GODDESS SEEKS TO FOIL HER SISTERS PLANS, NOT FOR REVENGE, BUT JUST BECAUSE IT CAN BE DONE." ELDEST OF THE CHAOS GODS, SHE'S FAIRLY LAZY IN HER ROLE, BUT STILL QUITE POWERFUL WHEN SHE DECIDES TO ACT." CHAOS ELDER XENOS MILITARUM ADMINISTRATUM THE EMPRESS SONENS Behold!
Being Alone, Bad, and Blade: WHO WILL YOU SIDE WITH?
 YOU ARE AN ASTARTE, CALLED UPON BY THE EMPRESS TO ASSIST IN THE UNIFICATION OF HUMANITY IN THE GREAT CRUSADE!
 HOWEVER, UPON RECEIVING YOUR MISSION YOUR MIND IS FILLED WITH A SULTRY HAZE, WHISPERED PROMISES OF POWER, TECHNOLOGY, LUST, AND LOVE
 IT IS THE FORCES OF CHAOS ATTEMPTING TO SWAY YOU FROM YOUR PATH!
 SO WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE ASTARTE?
 TEMPLATE
 WILL YOU CARRY ONWARD TO BRING HUMANITY INTO A NEW AGE?
 WILL YOU FALL TO CHAOS?
 PLANET/RULING-BODY
 WARHAMMER-GAL
 WARHAMMER-GALS
 OR WILL YOU FORGE YOUR OWN PATH AND ALLIANCES, SIDING WITH THE STRANGE RACES THAT EXPAND THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY?
 THE QUESTION STILL STANDS SON OF MAN, WHO WILL YOU SIDE WITH?
 TITLE
 +PRO
 SPRITE
 +PRO
 +PRO
 -CON
 -CON
 STATS
 LOVE
 POWER ITEM/ABILITY
 LUST
 TECH
 LOVE/LUST ITEM/ABILITY
 POWER
 FETISH
 FETISH
 TECH ITEM/ABILITY
 DISLIKE
 "DESCRIPTION"
 RULES:
 1. YOU CAN ONLY CHOOSE ONE FACTION
 2.YOU BEGIN WITH (40) POINTS
 3. ALL GALS AND ITEMS WITHIN YOUR FACTION COST HALF
 4. IF A GAL IS BOUGHT ALL HER ITEMS ARE OBTAINED
 5.ITEMS CAN BE BOUGHT SEPARATELY FROM THE GAL
 6. IF NO PRICE IS LISTED, IT CAN'T BE BOUGHT
 40
 IMPERIUM OF MAN
 EMPRESS OF MANKIND
 IMMORTAL MONARCH
 +LITERALLY GLOWS WITH BEAUTY
 +COMMANDS ALL OF THE IMPERIUM
 +KNOWS ALL YOUR DESIRES, AND LOVES THEM
 +/-WANTS AT LEAST 18 CHILDREN, MAYBE MORE
 -WILL NEVER TELL YOU WHAT SHE IS PLANNING
 THE BURNING BLADE
 GUARANTEES A VICTORY AGAINST CHAOS
 HOLY LAURELS-
 GAIN ANOTHER HUMAN LOVER
 MISSIONARY
 THE GOLDEN THRONE
 EXPLORATION
 ACQUIRE AN ELDAR TECH GIFT
 INTERSPECIES
 "THE ALL POWERFUL HEAD OF THE IMPERIUM, SHE SEEKS A BETTER FUTURE FOR
 HUMANITY, PERHAPS WITH YOU BY HER SIDE?
 25
 THE MECHANICHUM OF MARS
 TECH PRIESTESS
 THE HALL OF JUDGEMENT
 IMPERIAL JUDGE
 ADEPTUS ARBITE
 ORDER OF OUR MARTYRED LADY
 SISTER OF BATTLE
 OFFICIO ASSASSINORUM
 OFFICIO PREFECTUS
 [DATA REDACTED
 ROGUE PSYKER
 EVERSOR ASSASSIN
 LORD COMMISSAR
 UNFLINCHING LEADER
 THE ONE WHO DESTROYS
 ADEPT MECHANIC
 DAUGHTER OF THE EMPRESS
 VOID BORN MUTANT
 +LOVES TO BE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION
 +UPHOLDS THE LAW
 +COMMANDS A SLEW OF IMPERIAL REGIMENTS
 +FULLY CUSTOMIZABLE
 +GOOD WITH HER "HANDS
 +CAN FIX JUST ABOUT ANYTHING
 +EAGER TO SHOW HER DEVOTION FOR YOU
 +HAS QUITE THE LOVELY SMILE
 +GOOD FOR MORALE
 +STANDS FIRM WITH HER DECISIONS
 +NOTHING WILL STOP HER FROM GETTING TO YOU
 +ISA ONE WOMAN ARMY
 +A SKILLED WARRIOR WITH BLADE AND BOLTER
 +KNOWS HER WAY AROUND THE STREETS
 +ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
 +ALWAYS PRISTINE AND ORGANIZED
 +HAS A LOT OF HOT SIBLINGS
 +SEEMS TO KNOW WHATS ON YOUR MIND
 -WON'T WAVER THE LAW FOR YOU
 -LIKES TO RAMBLE ABOUT RULES
 RATHER ATTACHED TO HER DRUGS
 -NOT MANY FLESHY BITS LEFT
 -RARELY LOWERS HER "WALL"
 -HIDES UNDER A WALL OF PRUDISHNESS
 -ALWAYS
 -HAS AN EXPLOSIVE PERSONALITY
 -GIVES YOU HEADACHES
 -THINKS SHE IS GETTING ON IN YEARS
 -HER FAITH MAKES HER A TAD CRAZY AT TIMES
 -TREATS YOU LIKE A DOOFUS
 PSYKER'S LEXICARNUM
 RIOT SHIELD
 BOLT PISTOL
 TITAN STC TEMPLATE
 SYNSKIN BODYGLOVE
 MANTLE OF SAINT OPHELIA
 POINT THIS AT FOE OR A FEARFUL ALLY TO
 ABSORBS MOST DAMAGE COMING FROM
 ACQUIRE PLANS TO MAKE A POWERFUL
 COLUSSUS, IT JUST NEEDS TO BE BUILT
 GRANTS THE USER COMMAND OVER THE
 SKIN TIGHT OUTFIT THAT AMPLIFIES YOUR
 OWN FLEXIBILITY TO ASTONISHING HEIGHTS
 CALL UPON AN ENTIRE ORDER OF DEVOUT
 IMMATERIUM
 RANGED AND MELEE ATTACKS ALIKE
 INSPIRE YOUR TROOPS.
 SISTERS TO ASSIST YOU ON YOUR CRUSADE
 NEURO GAUNTLET-
 IMPERIAL VERDICT
 JUNIOR JUDGE BADGE-
 SERVITOR
 HOLLOW NAILS
 SIMULACRUM IMPERIALIS
 ALLOWS YOU TO ISSUE LAW UNTO IMPERIAL
 USED TO "SUBDUE" OTHERS, MAKING THEM
 GAIN ONE GIRL FROM THE MILITARUM OF
 WITH THE LIGHEST TOUCH, A PERSONS
 SENSES BECOME SUPER-SENSTIVE.
 SHE WILL CREATE A PERSONAL SERVANT
 NEGATE ONE DOWNSIDE OF ANOTHER ITEM
 CITIZENS GIVING YOU MORE POWER
 YOUR CHOOSING
 FOR YOU TO DO ANY BIDDING YOU DESIRE
 PASSIVE AT THE COST OF PERSONALITY
 JUSTICE
 TAKING CHARGE
 STUN MAUL
 LOUD SEX
 TOYS
 ASTRONOMICON
 HAND HOLDING
 BLESSING OF THE OMNISIAH-
 ALL MECHNICAL OBJECTS ARE INCAPABLE
 OF BREAKING WHILE NEAR YOU
 CUDDLES
 MELTA BOMBS
 POWERFIST-
 THE BOOK OF ST. LUCIUS
 OBEDIENCE
 € HERESY
 BODY MODS
 BODILY FLUIDS
 THE LAW
 SCRATCHING
 WHEN SOMETHING IS IN YOUR WAY
 DIRTY THOUGHTS
 BDSM
 VARYING SETTINGS FROM TINGLY TO
 WITH A SINGLE PUNCH YOU CAN TAKE
 PREVENTS YOU AND OTHER PSYKERS
 PURIFY CHAOS TAINT, GAIN A PURE LOVER
 RULE BREAKING
 FOREPLAY
 PREMARITAL SEX
 KISSING
 EXTRA CRISPY
 ACCEPT NOTHING ELSE TO CLEAR THE WAY
 DOWN A CARNIFEX
 FROM BEING LOST TO THE WARP
 "A WELL ESTABLISHED LEADER TO MANY IMPERIAL VICTORIES,SHE REFUSES TO RETIRE
 HER BLADE BUT MAYBE YOU'LL BE THE ONE TO EASE HER UP."
 "WORKING THE BEAT IN A WRETCHED HIVE CITY, HER BRANCHES EFFICIENCY HAS
 HELPED TURN THE TIDE OF LAWLESSNESS, NOW SHE WISHES TO AID OTHER PLANETS."
 "RELEASED FROM HER CAGE WITH ONLY A LOOSE OBJECTIVE, SHE DESIRES NOTHING
 MORE THEN THE COMPLETE ANNIHILATION OF YOUR ENEMIES."
 "A RECENT MEMBER TO THE ORDER OF OUR MARTYRED LADY, THIS SISTER IS EAGER
 TO PROVE HER DEVOTION ALONGSIDE AN ASTARTES SUCH AS YOURSELF."
 "THE HIGH PRIESTESS OF MARS, SHE DOTES ON YOU IN AN ALMOST ZEALOT FASHION,
 THOUGH YOUR UNCERTAIN WHETHER THAT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE OR NOT.
 "A SANCTIONED PSYKER WORKING FOR THE ROGUE TRADERS, SHE SEEMS TO HAVE
 TAKEN A KEEN INTEREST IN YOU, OR WHATEVER IS GOING ON IN THAT HEAD OF YOURS.
 12
 12
 14
 15
 TALLARN DESERT RAIDERS
 NECROMUNDA HIVE WORLD
 FELINID SPECIALIST
 CATS PAW TROOPER
 CATACHAN DEATH WORLD
 GREEN DEVIL ELITE
 CATACHAN JUNGLE FIGHTER
 LEAGUE OF EMBERG
 CADIAN SHOCK TROOP
 DEATH KORPS OF KRIEG
 SQUAT GUILDMASTER
 SPACE DWARF
 ENGINEER #8068
 ROUGH RIDER ELITE
 DUNE SCORPION
 PLASMA GUNNER
 DAUNTLESS CLONE TROOPER
 SOLDIER OF THE IMPERIUM
 +COURAGEOUS WARRIOR GUILDMASTER
 THOSE THIGHS COULD CRUSH A WATERMELON
 +LAUGHS IN THE FACE OF DANGER
 EXCITED TO SHOW YOU HER TALENTS
 +PHYSICALLY AFFECTIONATE
 +HAS A COLLECTION OF FANTASTIC TALES
 +COMPLETELY FEARLESS
 +BRED TO "SERVE"
 +EVERY ACTION HERO ROLLED INTO ONE
 +TIMIDLY SNORTS WHEN SHE LAUGHS
 +NEVER QUESTIONS ORDERS GIVEN TO HER
 +CAN OUTDRINK ANYONE
 +SHORT EVEN AMONGST SQUATS
 +/-THAT GAP IN HER TEETH WHISTLES
 +WANTS A BIG FAMILY
 +CURIOUS TO LEARN ABOUT... FEELINGS
 +PURRS WHEN SHE IS PLEASED
 +A TRULY BRAVE SOLDIER
 -HER BROTHERS ARE EXTREMELY PROTECTIVE
 -TREATS YOU LIKE THE NEW GUY
 -ESCHEWS WEALTH AND GLORY
 -VIOLENT DRUNK
 -WILL SHRED YOUR FURNITURE
 -ALMOST SELF-DESTRUCTIVELY SO
 -KEEPS BRINGING YOU BLOODY TROPHIES
 -SMELLS A BIT LIKE SULPHUR
 -HONESTLY KIND OF NAIVE
 -VERY EMBARRESED WHEN NAKED
 -IS A TOTAL PUSSY
 -PROBALY GOING TO DIE
 TIGERS FELL CLAW
 A POWERFUL FELINID WEAPON, IT CAN
 SHEAR CLEAN THROUGH MOST THINGS
 CATACHAN FANG
 IMPERIAL INFANTRYMAN'S PRIMER
 REGIMENT'S WAR STANDARD
 SUPER HEAVY ARTILLERY BATTERY
 ORK SPORE ROTGUT
 IF GIVEN TO AN IMPERIAL SOLDIER THEY
 20 INCHES OF GLEAMING STEEL, RENDS A
 OBTAIN 10 POWER POINTS TO SPEND ON
 CONSUMER BECOMES PASSIVE, THINGS
 APPEAR MUCH LARGER THEN THEY ARE
 REMOVE ONE THREAT FROM THE HISTORY
 VENUS MANTRAP WITH A SINGLE SWIPE
 WILL BE INSPIRED TO GREAT DEEDS
 MORE TROOPS FROM THE MILITARUM
 BOOKS
 ENGINEER # 8068 MASK
 WELL WORN RED BANDANA
 KITTY OBSCURA
 MUKAALI WARBEAST
 REINFORCED FLAK ARMOR
 DIRE AMASEC-
 A MASSIVE ANIMAL CAPABLE OF HAULING
 OTHER CATACHAN FIGHTERS ACCEPT YOU
 NEGATE ALL MORALE OR EMOTION BASED
 A POPULAR FELINID DRUG, IT SENDS ANY
 EASILY THE STRONGEST PROTECTION IN
 CONSUMER CAN SEE THROUGH GARMENTS
 YOU ACROSS EVEN THE HARSHEST TERRAIN
 THE GALAXY AS LONG AS YOU ARE FAITHFUL
 ISSUES WHILE WORN
 INTO THEIR TEAM, A TRUE HONOR
 FEMALE INTO A HEATED TIZZY
 HAIR PULLING
 BODY PAINT
 GENTLE SEX
 LICKING
 FRESH PAIR OF SOCKS
 ANCIENT ORDINATUS MAP-
 A MAP LEADING TO A WAR ENDING DEVICE
 JACKHAMMERING
 DNA SPLICER
 TAKING ORDERS
 EXO-ARMOUR BELT
 SUB BECOMES STUCK TO THE DOM'S
 GENITALS
 KORPS CLONE VATS
 M35 M-GALAXY SHORT PATTERN LASGUN
 OUTDOOR SEX
 FACE TOUCHING
 CHOKING
 DRUNKEN SEX
 COWGIRL
 EAR RUBS
 PRONE POSITION
 IMMENSELY POWERFUL AND ACCURATE
 CREATE YOUR OWN PERSONAL ARMY OF
 KRIEGERS
 AN ANCIENT RELIC USED TO CREATE
 YOU ARE GOING TO NEED THESE, AND SHE
 SHAVING
 CAT CALLING
 BOSSY PARTNERS
 PILLOW TALK
 COWARDICE
 BROUGHT A SPARE FOR YOU
 SOMEWHERE IN THE EXPANSIVE DESERT
 HALF ANIMAL ABHUMANS
 FEARFUL TO FOES OF THE IMPERIUM
 "A VETERAN OF HELLISH COMBAT CONDITIONS, SHE SEEMS TO COMPLETELY LACK AN OFF
 SWITCH, BUT VERY MUCH ENJOYS HAVING YOU AS A HUNTING BUDDY NONETHELESS.
 "FAMED FOR HER SKILLS ON HORSEBACK, SHE ONLY FEELS FREE WITH THE WIND
 BLOWING ACROSS HER FACE."
 "A NAMELESS SOLDIER, ONLY IDENTIFIED BY HER RED NECKERCHIEF. SHES QUIET, BUT
 YOU WOULDNT WANT ANYONE ELSE IN THAT FOX HOLE BESIDE YOU.
 "HER HOMEWORLD WAS DEVOURED BY TYRANIDS, AND HER ENTIRE RACE WAS
 SPLINTERED THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY. SHE DESIRES TO UNIFY HER PEOPLE.
 "A MEMBER OF THE RARE FELINE ABHUMANS, SHE HOPES TO PROVE HER PEOPLE ARE
 MORE THEN JUST EXOTIC NOVELTIES.
 "HER HOME RECENTLY DESTROYED, SHE LIVES AMONGST THE STARS IN A GIANT
 VESSEL, TASKED WITH PROTECTING ALL OF HUMANITY THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY."
 10
 15
 16
 10
 TAU EMPIRE
 TRAVELING WARSPHERES
 HIVE FLEET BEHEMOTH
 OLD ONE EYE
 EVIL SUNZ
 THE OUTER REACH
 PLANET VESPID
 FIRE WARRIOR
 CADRE COMMANDÉR
 KROOT SHAPER
 VESPID STINGWING
 TAU AUXILIARY TROOPER
 GENESTEALER
 ORK WARBOSS
 WHITE FANG OILGUZZLER
 KINDRED MERCENARY
 STONEFIST CARNIFEX
 CORPORAPTOR HOMINIS
 +LEADS HER OWN WAAAGH
 +HYPER ADAPTIVE BODY
 +A CAREFREE AIRHEAD
 +A WALKING DERVISH OF BLADES
 +TRIES HER BEST TO BE A GOOD MATE
 +SMELLS LIKE BLUEBERRIES
 +CAN WORK ALONGSIDE ANY RACE
 +A GREAT CHEF
 TIMID FOR A CARNIFEX
 +LIKES TO PLAY CHASE
 +ONCE PUNCHED A SPACE BUG TO DEFF
 +GOOD WITH DIPLOMANCY
 +GREAT FLYER AND SCOUT
 +0DDLY CUDDLY
 +LOVES TO BE PHYSICAL
 +DA MOST BIGGEST GAL OF HER TRIBE
 +EAGER TO GAIN YOU AS AN ALLY
 +HAPPY TO CARRY YOU AROUND
 JUST DONT ASK ABOUT THE INGREDIENTS
 LACKS DEPTH PERCEPTION
 CRIES WHEN SHE IS ALONE
 THAT HAIR IS JUST A WEAVE
 -PREACHES SPACE COMMUNISM NON-STOP
 -MOSTLY SPEAKS IN SHRIEKS
 DARK SENSE OF HUMOR
 COMPLETE AND UTTER WEEB
 ACCIDENTALLY BREAKS THINGS IN HER WAY
 HER TEARS ARE ACID
 SHE WILL KRUMP YOUR PELVIS BOY
 -HAS REALLY ROUGH SKIN
 HOUND HORN
 MOLTED CARAPACE
 CHITIN CHUNK
 ADRENAL GLANDS
 MV52 SHIELD DRONE-
 WAAAAAAAAAAGH STICK
 CALL UPON A MASSIVE KROOT HOUND PACK
 TO DEVOUR YOUR ENEMIES
 BECOME UNABLE TO RUN OUT OF ENERGY
 DENSE AND THICK, THIS NATURAL ARMOR
 APROTOTYPE SHIELD DRONE THAT HAS A
 WHEN GROUND INTO A HOT BEVERAGE IT
 9
 GAIN AN UTTERLY MASSIVE ORK WARBAND
 CAN BE USED AS AN AMAZING SHIELD
 FOR A PROLONGED PERIOD
 SURPRISINGLY ACTIVE PERSONALITY
 BECOMES A POWERFUL APHRODISIAC
 AS WELL AS THIS ODDLY PHALLIC POLE
 LOVERS FEAST
 PHEROMONE TUBE
 THIS TUBE EMITS A SOFT FRAGRANT SCENT
 TOXIC SACS
 WAIFU WALL POSTER
 COMMUNION HELM-
 ADAPTING SPORES-
 AN OVER THE TOP PAINTING OF O'SHASERRA
 ALLOWS THE KROOT TO ADAPT MORE
 WHEN INJECTED ALL BODILY SENSES ARE
 WHEN WORN YOU ARE CAPABLE OF
 GAIN THE ABILITY TO MATE WITH ALL
 AMPLIFIED IMMENSELY FOR A SHORT TIME
 ABUNDANT FEATURES FOR HUMAN LOVERS
 THAT LURES WOMEN TO YOU
 THAT YOU CAN'T HELP BUT ADMIRE
 TALKING TO ANY RACE VIA TELEPATHY
 RACES OR EVEN INANIMATE OBJECTS
 BACKRUBS
 IMPREGNATION
 GOOD GENES
 WEAK MATES
 CLAW-PLAY
 ESKIMO KISSES
 KROOT GLANDS
 GIVES YOU THE ABILITY TO ADAPT BASED
 SLAVE-PLAY
 DOMINANCE
 RIPPER SWARMS
 MEGA CHOPPA
 DA SHINIEST SET OF WHEELS THIS SIDE OF
 DA GALAXY, AROUSES ALL DA ORK LADIES
 MESOPLARUM ARMOR-
 YMGARL MUTATION SEED-
 XV22 STEALTHSUIT
 PHEROMONES
 QUICKIES
 CUM ON WINGS
 VORE
 SMALL BOYZ
 CUMSHOTS
 A FRANTIC PACK OF TYRANID RIPPERS
 LIKES AND DISLIKES BECOME THAT OF
 A EXPERIMENTAL BATTLESUIT THAT USES
 RESIST ALL ENERGY BASED WEAPONS
 FOODPLAY
 WASTING FLUIDS
 CUDDLING
 ROUGH SEX
 ON WHAT YOU EAT SIMILAR TO THE KROOT
 ANOTHER PERSONS
 THAT WILL DO YOUR BIDDING
 CLOAKING TECHNOLOGY TO GO INVISIBLE
 WHEN WORN
 "LEADER TO HER OWN WARBAND, SHE AND HER WARRIORS SEEK TO BECOME THE
 PERFECT MATES FOR THEIR LOVERS THROUGH USE OF THEIR ADAPTIVE TRAITS.
 "FLOATING ALONE IN A SPACE HULK FOR WHO KNOWS HOW LONG, SHE DESIRES A MATE
 AND PURPOSE, WILL YOU HELP HER?"
 "AN ORK WHO GAINED HER TITLE THROUGH KRUMPING SKULLS. SHE WILL NOT
 ACCEPT THAT ANYONE COULD FEASIBLY BE STRONGER THAN HER. DARE YOU TRY?
 "A YOUNG FIRE SQUAD LEADER, THE PROSPECT OF GAINING YOU AS AN ALLY HAS
 HER OVERTLY EXCITED.
 "AFTER LEADING SEVERAL SUCCESSFUL MISSIONS, SHE WAS ALLOWED TO WORK
 ON HER OWN. SHE HAS DECIDED TO JOIN A NEW FORCE AND SEE WHAT THEY OFFER."
 "ABANDONED ON AN ICEWORLD, LONG LOST TO HER HIVE, SHE DUG HERSELF FREE
 FROM AN ICY PRISON. NOW SHE IS HUNGRY AND DETERMINED TO FIND A NEW HOME.
 30
 10
 11
 THE DARK CITY COMMORRAGH
 KABALITE WARRIOR
 16
 TOMBWORLD PAVONIS
 SAUTEKH DYNASTY
 ULTHWE CRAFTWORLD
 TALDEER
 THE OUTER REACH
 BIEL-TAN CRAFTWORLD
 THE NIGHT BRINGER
 CTAN SHARD
 SHADOWSEER
 NECRON WARRIOR
 МАCНA
 TOMB WORLD GUARDIAN
 HARLEQUIN MASQUE PLAYER
 SYBARITE OF THE BLACK HEART
 ELDAR FARSEER
 ELDAR FARSEER
 +A SUCKER FOR ATTENTION
 +INCREDIBLE ENDURANCE
 MOTHER WARNED YOU ABOUT GIRLS LIKE HER
 +INTO REAL KINKY SHIT
 +WRITES PASSIONATE LUSTY TALES FOR YOU
 +FLEXIBLE AS A RUBBER BAND
 +WIELDS POWERFUL PSYCHIC ABILITIES
 +IMMORTALITY IS PRETTY GREAT
 +FORGIVES YOU FOR ANY MISTAKE YOU MAKE
 +LIKES TO STICK HER NECK OUT FOR YOU
 +CAN PLAY THE ROLE OF JUST ABOUT ANYONE
 +A BEACON OF HOPE FOR HER PEOPLE
 +A TOTAL FLIRT
 +A LITERAL GOD-BEING
 +CUTE UNDER THAT MASK
 +HAPPY TO INDULGE YOU
 +ETERNALLY YOUNG AND SUPPLE
 +CLAIMS OF MANY SEXUAL EXPLOITS
 -DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THE WORD NO
 -THE WAY SHE HEALS IS A BIT CREEPY
 -IS NEVER GOING TO TAKE IT OFF
 -IS ACTUALLY A VIRGIN
 WITHERS AWAY IF SHES NOT HURTING THINGS
 -LIKES TO NAG YOU
 -NOT WHAT SHE USED TO BE
 -LIKES TO TAKE LONG NAPS
 -ALWAYS IN CHARACTER
 -YOU MAKE A DELIGHTFUL PINCUSHION
 ARROGANCE YOU CAN ONLY ADMIRE
 INSUFFERABLY SO
 ENTROPIC SCYTHE
 MIST STAVE
 A WEAPON THAT CHANNELS MENTAL FORCE
 TO CRUSH ARMOR AND BONES
 METAL BAND-AID
 SOUL STONE
 IF YOU PERISH WHILST WEARING THIS GEM
 GHOSTHELM
 SHADOW FIELD
 AT THE COST OF A LIFE YOU CAN REVIVE
 MAGNETIC AND FLEXIBLE, THIS ITEM FIXES
 CONCEALS YOUR MENTAL PRESENCE
 GAIN A PROTECTIVE BARRIER OF SHADOW
 ANOTHER PERSON.
 ANYTHING DAMAGED UNDERNEATH IT
 YOUR SOUL WILL BE RETAINED INSIDE IT
 FROM THE WARP
 AND MIST
 EVERFLOWING COWL
 CONCEALS THE FACIAL DETAILS OF ANYONE
 DOG-EARRED PLAY SCRIPT
 TWITCHY SCARAB
 VIBROBLADE
 CLEAVES THROUGH THE TOUGHEST ARMOR
 COMBAT DRUGS
 MACHA'S VIBROSWORD
 A CURIOUS SCARAB PET, IT SEEMS TO BE
 A HANDFULL OF STRANGE PILLS THAT HELP
 GAIN THE ABILITY TO UNDERSTAND
 SLIGHTLY USED, TALDEER DOESN'T LIKE
 HOLDING IT, BUT MAYBE YOU WILL
 WHO WEARS THIS
 BROKEN AND HUMS CONSTANTLY
 INTERPRETIVE DANCE FROM ANY RACE
 AMPLIFY PHYSICAL CAPABILITIES
 VIBRATING TENDERLY ALL THE WHILE
 EATING
 NECRODERMIS
 HEAD-PATS
 VOYEURISM
 GAUSS GUN
 PAIN PLAY
 THE PANACEA
 EDGING
 ACTUAL SEX
 EMBARASSMENT
 SWEET TALK
 FLIP BELT-
 STAFF OF ULTHAMAR
 RUNE ARMOUR
 RAPE-PLAY
 HAVE YOUR FLESH REPLACED WITH A
 CLANG-CLANG
 ROLEPLAY
 LATEX
 POWERFUL RIFLE THAT BREAKS DOWN
 WHILE WORN, YOU HAVE CONTROL OVER
 KISSING
 A POWERFUL PSYCHIC WEAPON, WILL HELP
 YOU GARNER RESPECT, EVEN WITH ELDAR
 A CURE FOR ALL KNOWN EARTHLY
 ELEGANT WRAITHBONE ARMOUR THAT
 ENSLAVEMENT
 MORNING SEX
 LIVING METAL THAT REPAIRS ITSELF
 CRITICS
 SLUTS
 ANYTHING IT HITS AT THE ATOMIC LEVEL
 GENTLE SEX
 YOUR OWN GRAVITY
 DISEASES
 DEFENDS YOU FROM PSYCHIC ATTACKS
 "A ONCE POWERFUL BEING THAT HUNGERS FOR ALL, SHE IS PLEASED WITH YOU FOR
 FREEING HER FROM HER BINDS, THOUGH YOU'RE UNCERTAIN IF IT WAS A GOOD IDEA."
 "ASLEEP FOR EONS, THIS WARRIOR HAS FINALLY AWOKEN. SHE IS EXCITED TO
 SEEWHAT SHE HASMISSED AND IS EAGER TO EXPLORE THE GALAXY AGAIN.
 "A SOLO TROUPE HARLEQUIN THAT TREATS YOU LIKE ANOTHER ACTOR IN HER OWN
 PERSONAL PLAY, THOUGH YOUR PART SEEMS TO BE THAT OF HER BELOVED.
 "LEFT ALONE ON A HELLISH WORLD BY HER COMPATRIOTS, SHE THOUGHT HER LIFE
 FORFEIT TILL YOU SAVED HER. NOW SHE'S BECOME QUITE ATTACHED TO YOU."
 "A DAUGHTER OF THE GREAT ELDRAD, EVER PLOTTING, EVEN AMONGST HER
 OWN PEOPLE, RARELY DO THEY KNOW HER OWN MACHINATIONS.
 "A DAUGHTER OF THE GREAT ELDRAD, SHE IS ONE OF THE MOST TALENTED FARSEERS
 BIEL-TAN, HO EVER HER DESPERATION FOR LOVE HINDERS HER FOCUS
 40
 11
 11
 11
 11
 CULT OF CHAOS UNDIVIDED
 CHAOS CULTIST
 CHILD OF CHAOS
 REALM OF DEATH AND DECA
 NURGLE
 GRANDMA NURGLE
 ABANDONED WARPSPACE
 GREAT SKULL THRONE
 KHORNE
 LADY OF RAGE
 KINGDOM OF PLEASURE
 SLAANESH
 SHE WHO THIRSTS
 THE CRYSTAL LABYRINTH
 MALAL
 TZEENTCH
 FORGOTTEN CHAOS GODDESS
 CHANGER OF WAYS
 THE "BELOVED" DAUGHTER OF CHAOS GODS
 +SEEKS TO RUIN THE OTHER CHAOS GODS
 +GOD OF SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK-N-ROLL
 +MAKES A MEAN SOUP
 LOVES PLAYING GAMES WITH YOU
 GODDESS OF BLOOD, WAR, AND MURDER
 INCREDIBLY OPTIMISTIC
 RARELY WORRIES ABOUT THINGS
 +DOESN'T ASK MUCH OF YOU
 +CURVACEOUS IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES
 INTO DOING EVERYTHING WITH YOU
 +WILL ALWAYS BE DIRECT WITH YOU
 A GREAT TEACHER
 +IMMORTAL VIA A POWERFUL NURGLE BLESSING
 HOTTEST THING IN EXISTENCE
 +/-SWITCHES FROM SUB TO DOM IN A SNAP
 +SURPRISINGLY EASY TO PLEASE
 +ALWAYS HAS A PLAN B
 SPAEKS IN HWA TUNGE OO KHAY-OS
 -INCREDIBLY RESTLESS
 -PLANS MAKE NO SENSE
 -PRANKSTER AT HEART
 BEING WITH HER OUSTS YOU FROM OTHERS
 -THAT ISN'T FAT
 -ALSO INTO SOME REALLY FREAKY STUFF
 NOT THE SHARPEST KNIFE IN THE DRAWER
 WHAT IS DOWN THERE?!
 A REAL BAD INFLUENCE
 -SPEAKS ONLY BY YELLING
 -GROSS ON A WHOLE NEW LEVEL
 DISC OF TZEENTCH-
 FORSAKEN AXE-
 HORN OF NURGLE
 THE CRIMSON SKULL CROWN
 BLADE OF THE LAER
 A RATHER PRETTY LOOKING SKULL
 A POSSESSED WEAPON INFUSED WITH
 PLAYING THIS HORN SUMMONS THE DEAD
 GAIN A DEMONIC ENTITY THAT CAN SOAR
 GAIN A RATHER UNHAPPY CHAMPION OF
 KHORNES FAVORITE SKULL, IF YOU HOLD IT
 SHE WILL LISTEN TO YOUR REQUESTS
 MARK OF KHORNE-
 WHEN SLAIN YOUR KILLER WILL SLOWLY
 DAEMONIC ENERGY THAT HEWS ANYTHING
 TO RISE AND FOLLOW YOUR ORDERS
 THE ETHERIC LEYLINES AS A MOUNT
 YOUR CHOOSING
 BLOOD OF SLAANESH
 TURN INTO YOU
 MARK OF NURGLE-
 MONOCHROME MASK
 MARK OF TZEENTCH-
 MARK OF SLAANESH
 GIVES YOU THE POWERS OF A DAEMON AND
 THE CULTIST ASCENDS TO PRINCEHOOD
 BECOME A MASTER OF ANY WEAPON YOU10
 YOU ARE PROTECTED FROM WORLDY HARM
 ENDURE THE MOST GRIEVIOUS WOUNDS
 BECOME A MASTER OF THE SEXUAL ARTS10
 MAKING YOU HER CHAMPION
 A TWISTED POWERFUL BODY TO MATCH
 WIELD IN YOUR HANDS
 AND PAINFUL STRIKES
 VIA AN INVISIBLE SHIELD
 oRe THE ENDLESS GRIMOIRE OF TZEENTCH
 GAIN A SINGLE FAVOR FROM A CHAOS GOD
 LOVE BITES
 TEASING
 EROTIC LIT
 INDIFFERENCE
 SURPRISES
 BLOOD-PLAY
 GORECHILD
 MANREAPER
 EVERYTHING
 SLOPPY KISSES
 DOOM GUITAR-
 THE BLACK BOOK
 THE BLACK STAFF
 RITUAL MATING
 CREATIVITY
 PRUDES
 WORSHIP
 PASSIONATE SEX
 BELLY RUBS
 A CORRUPT STAFF OF VAST POWER WHICH
 AMPLIFIES THE NOTES YOU STRUM TO
 A STRANGE BOOK THAT GIVES YOU DARK
 A BLESSED CHAINAXE THAT BECOMES
 COATED WITH VIRULENT DISEASES AND
 NEGLECT
 PLANNED SEX
 OF YOUR CHOOSING
 BOTTOMING
 BATHS
 THE POINT OF EXPLOSIVE SONIC ENERGY.
 KNOWLEDGE OF THE UNIVERSE
 FILTH THAT ROTS FLESH TO THE TOUCH
 MORE POWERFUL THE MORE YOU KILL
 GIVES ITS USER DEFT PSYCHIC ABILITIES
 "THE APPARENT DAUGHTER OF CHAOS, IT'S SAID SHE IS DESTINED FOR GREATNESS,
 ALTHOUGH SHE HAS YET TO SEEM SO GREAT."
 "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GODDESS! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!
 "WAIT ARE YOU SERIOUS? YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE THE PRINCE OF PLEASURE?!
 WELL A CHALLENGE IS ALWAYS WELCOME, AND HE THINKS YOU ARE QUITE CUTE.
 "OF ALL THE GODS, SHE HOLDS THE CRUELEST SENSE OF HUMOR. HER LOVE OF
 RIDDLES, WORD PLAY, AND DRY WIT, TORMENTING OTHERS TO INSANITY.
 "WANDERING A LIFELESS VOID IN THE WARP, THIS UNREMEMBERED GODDESS SEEKS
 TO FOIL HER SISTERS PLANS, NOT FOR REVENGE, BUT JUST BECAUSE IT CAN BE DONE."
 ELDEST OF THE CHAOS GODS, SHE'S FAIRLY LAZY IN HER ROLE, BUT STILL QUITE
 POWERFUL WHEN SHE DECIDES TO ACT."
 CHAOS
 ELDER XENOS
 MILITARUM
 ADMINISTRATUM
 THE EMPRESS
 SONENS
Behold!

Behold!

4chan, Alive, and Anaconda: File: USCG POlice Kodiak Officers ipg (67 KB, 800x571) robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:43:02 No.44793676244793873 244795495 here is a story about me an robot that ended up as a cop Be me 17 (2007) have odd ticks of flailing my hand and jumping up and down listening to music on my ipod and saying stupid shit at random times enlist in US Coast guard as Maritime specialist which is fancy talk for Coast guard cop go to basic and A-school and somehow dont spill my autism everywhere Robocop in /r9k/ go through a month at best of field training and then given a beat up crown Victoria to patrol the base and surronding areas which is mostly ghetto >my autism starts to slowly bubble up when I am sitting in my car for 12 hours a day in between calls supporting the local police at domestics or stupid shit >sitting in a empty parking lot off base and I start listening to my ipod start autistically dancing in my seat and screaming random nonsense >doing this for a few minutes and listening for radio checks or my call number nymous 04/19/1 8 No.44794268 IS s my senior enlisted aka chief of my station >he has a confused look "uhhhh sorry sir, I was getting bored and let myself go ta 28 No.4479480944794865 2244794916 244794941 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:54:13 No.44793873244794005 File 163 png (16 KB, 746x982) owe spend the next three days looking for this guy ta sked questions, I call that night they h y chief looks at me well Petty officer anon, I get put back on duty >FBI,SWAT and everyone is >suspect will not come out of the house unle press crews are filming the we all want to kill this dude b for 3 1/2 more years stand off On July 27th, 2015, the 37-year-old suspect was sentenced to life n without the possi 0 >get job in large college town in Georgia but move in with my grandparents that live there >do my FTO training which is more of a formality since I am trained on a federal level >work downtown and mostly work the foot patrol but still have a car Pits peaceful but we know he is gonna get his ass beat in jail people are talking about how he didnt surrender because some guy was screaming "IM gonna fucking kill you" i nthe apartment complex the crime happened in >go to work the next day and get called into the Chiefs office >get told I am getting put on admin duty for causing damage to the car and for yelling at a citizen and will require a psych eval -get eval and pass, get to keep my autism is controlled and limited to my room at my grandparents all I do is drink and shitpost when I get home, my grandparents are treating me like a child and I throw an autistic fit and smash a chair say sorry and go to bed finally move out to apartment near downtown near famous tree and can see downtown and below me on the bottom of the hill is the public housing get bright ldea begin to watch the denizens of the public housing literally spend the next 6 months downtown behind the bulletproof glass hearing about parking tickets and coffee being stolen librarian girl dumps me because "you have PTSD" end up going to work in ill fitting uniforms and 5 o clock shadow get put back on footpatrol after 7 months on the desk airsoft rife from academy >I deal with the homeless often and drink my self after my 6am to 3 pm watch go to dive bar and become friends with odd guy that has OCD touretts come good friends e literally snorts his adderall at the table but its a legit RX > become friends with all the people at the bars robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:01:11 No.4479400544794163 2244794285 start to know all the homeless, the locals and others become a well loved dude even by the liberals and anarchists IC >put rifle away and just watch from my porch on the third story with my binoculars while drinking PBR or some shitty beer t girl, she is a punk type girl and I am "the man >start remembering their faces and see them downtown asking for change l would say subtle stuff like "well I bet you have weed in your left pocket and you spent your last 10 on rotgut liquor from the korean package store on xyz street >I would always scare them and say "just joking literally begin to autistically get to know what they do from 6pm-12 am while I watched them learn where the dealers live and end up connecting the dots to where the weapons are stolen from robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:50:49 No.4479494144795204 my GF loves my ticks and knows I keep it at home and not at work robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:15:44 No.447942852244794714 rumors flying around in public housing about some smart ass SWAT guy >develop a SWAT alter ego called "Swift response Autist tell my detective friend that I saw X and Y talking at certain point and tip them off detectives are raking in stolen weapons and pounds of crack and meth off the street everytime I hear about an arrest at home, I start violently flailing my hands and arms and scream in happines sychologically scares the suspect one raid I even took down a metal door with a crowbar without any sonly do SWAT when needed and stay a nice little community policing cop on days I am not needed >l open the door and its people I know and tell them "sorry, was the TV loud?" "Oh sorry continue my job, finallyget off my 1 year job probation and become a swat officeer e and alot of cops dont know that X my drinking problem remains steady and my friends and GF stay beside me and dont care about my little autistic ticks >OH SHIT my AUTISM DAYS ARE BEHIND ME!! fastforward to 2016 meet a beautiful librarian that is artistic and has a rocking body her and she >I start volunteering for library security details after work to talk to her finally end my dry spell of 2 years robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:05:39 No.4479520444795281 2244795360 2244795377 2244795487 without s a retard after she leaves and dance around my apartment while I put on my uniform (march 2011 >get a officer down call while at work promoted to SGT of the c still autistic SWAT guy on the days I am told to be ALL UNITS RESPONDII! render first aid to down SGT because my old FTO is dead "IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOUI!" YOUR GONNNA FUCKING DIE!!!" >get to scene first and see my old FTO had gotten shot in the face and a SGT has been shot always at the dive bar in downtown and my command knows it one night, I get super drunk and cant drive home and decide hey im gonna walk home which is 3-5 miles way ers and the >get busted to CPL >leave SWAT team and other billets >other units get here and have to pull me off the SGT while they try to talk me down flailing about like a dumbass through the scene but the chiefs and higher brass let me because they think I am grieving told I should go home and change my uniforms and get a monster and start with the manhunt >l am seething and riving my car 100+ with lights back to my apartment >l curb it and park it at my apartment complex snew guys from Atlanta always fill the SGT billets and command always has "paperwork" issues with my packets robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:10:48 No.447952894506 l robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:24:42 No.44794467 4794597 22447948z thanks for listening ro p your dreams alive and always strive for greatness even if you think your not good wash up and call my GF and autistically ramble while I go into my gun closet and take out my pride and joy a M14 and start loading the magazines while screaming I have lurked her for years and don't plan to post OP threads anymore but I will definitely be lurking and commenting open the door in full police gear with a loaded m14 FUCK YOU BITCH!!!IMY FRIEND JUST DIED!" have a good day and drink a cold tall boy of PBR or NEwcastle for me lam the door in her face and load up my vest with a full combat load my car thats still running and curbed 8 No 44796604244796736 44797003 literally feeling autistic rage boiling in my b takes the bumper off and drive off >cops are pouring in from all over the southeast, there are abour 6 choppers in the air at any time >I have my rifle loaded and I am starting to flail my arms >literally no one cares that I am in an autistic rage finally get dispatched to public housing on e we are literally walking through the complex with AR's and in full combat gear like Iraq and yelling "IF you know anything about the police shooting there is a 10k award" Women and men are flipping us birds and we flip them back >my spaghetti is
4chan, Alive, and Anaconda: File: USCG POlice Kodiak Officers ipg (67 KB, 800x571)
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:43:02 No.44793676244793873 244795495
 here is a story about me an robot that ended up as a cop
 Be me 17 (2007) have odd ticks of flailing my hand and jumping up and down listening to music on my ipod and saying stupid shit at random times
 enlist in US Coast guard as Maritime specialist which is fancy talk for Coast guard cop
 go to basic and A-school and somehow dont spill my autism everywhere
 Robocop in /r9k/
 go through a month at best of field training and then given a beat up crown Victoria to patrol the base and surronding areas which is mostly ghetto
 >my autism starts to slowly bubble up when I am sitting in my car for 12 hours a day in between calls supporting the local police at domestics or stupid shit
 >sitting in a empty parking lot off base and I start listening to my ipod
 start autistically dancing in my seat and screaming random nonsense
 >doing this for a few minutes and listening for radio checks or my call number
 nymous 04/19/1
 8 No.44794268
 IS
 s my senior enlisted aka chief of my station
 >he has a confused look
 "uhhhh sorry sir, I was getting bored and let myself go
 ta
 28 No.4479480944794865 2244794916 244794941
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:54:13 No.44793873244794005
 File
 163 png (16 KB, 746x982)
 owe spend the next three days looking for this guy
 ta
 sked questions, I
 call that night they h
 y chief looks at me
 well Petty officer anon, I
 get put back on duty
 >FBI,SWAT and everyone is
 >suspect will not come out of the house unle
 press crews are filming the
 we all want to kill this dude
 b for 3 1/2 more years
 stand off
 On July 27th, 2015, the 37-year-old suspect was sentenced to life
 n without the possi
 0
 >get job in large college town in Georgia but move in with my grandparents that live there
 >do my FTO training which is more of a formality since I am trained on a federal level
 >work downtown and mostly work the foot patrol but still have a car
 Pits peaceful but we know he is gonna get his ass beat in jail
 people are talking about how he didnt surrender because some guy was screaming "IM gonna fucking kill you" i nthe apartment complex the crime happened in
 >go to work the next day and get called into the Chiefs office
 >get told I am getting put on admin duty for causing damage to the car and for yelling at a citizen and will require a psych eval
 -get eval and pass, get to keep my
 autism is controlled and limited to my room at my grandparents
 all I do is drink and shitpost when I get home, my grandparents are treating me like a child and I throw an autistic fit and smash a chair
 say sorry and go to bed
 finally move out to apartment near downtown near famous tree and can see downtown and below me on the bottom of the hill is the public housing
 get bright ldea
 begin to watch the denizens of the public housing
 literally spend the next 6 months downtown behind the bulletproof glass hearing about parking tickets and coffee being stolen
 librarian girl dumps me because "you have PTSD"
 end up going to work in ill fitting uniforms and 5 o clock shadow
 get put back on footpatrol after 7 months on the desk
 airsoft rife from academy
 >I deal with the homeless often and drink my self after my 6am to 3 pm watch
 go to dive bar and become friends with odd guy that has OCD touretts
 come good friends
 e literally snorts his adderall at the table but its a legit RX
 > become friends with all the people at the bars
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:01:11 No.4479400544794163 2244794285
 start to know all the homeless, the locals and others
 become a well loved dude even by the liberals and anarchists
 IC
 >put rifle away and just watch from my porch on the third story with my binoculars while drinking PBR or some shitty beer
 t girl, she is a punk type girl and I am "the man
 >start remembering their faces and see them downtown asking for change
 l would say subtle stuff like "well I bet you have weed in your left pocket and you spent your last 10 on rotgut liquor from the korean package store on xyz street
 >I would always scare them and say "just joking
 literally begin to autistically get to know what they do from 6pm-12 am while I watched them
 learn where the dealers live and end up connecting the dots to where the weapons are stolen from
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:50:49 No.4479494144795204
 my GF loves my ticks and knows I keep it at home and not at work
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:15:44 No.447942852244794714
 rumors flying around in public housing about some smart ass SWAT guy
 >develop a SWAT alter ego called "Swift response Autist
 tell my detective friend that I saw X and Y talking at certain point and tip them off
 detectives are raking in stolen weapons and pounds of crack and meth off the street
 everytime I hear about an arrest at home, I start violently flailing my hands and arms and scream in happines
 sychologically scares the suspect
 one raid I even took down a metal door with a crowbar without any
 sonly do SWAT when needed and stay a nice little community policing cop on days I am not needed
 >l open the door and its people I know and tell them "sorry, was the TV loud?"
 "Oh sorry
 continue my job, finallyget off my 1 year job probation and become a swat officeer
 e and alot of cops dont know that X
 my drinking problem remains steady and my friends and GF stay beside me and dont care about my little autistic ticks
 >OH SHIT my AUTISM DAYS ARE BEHIND ME!!
 fastforward to 2016
 meet a beautiful librarian that is artistic and has a rocking body
 her and she
 >I start volunteering for library security details after work to talk to her
 finally end my dry spell of 2 years
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:05:39 No.4479520444795281 2244795360 2244795377 2244795487
 without s
 a retard after she leaves and dance around my apartment while I put on my uniform (march 2011
 >get a officer down call while at work
 promoted to SGT of the c
 still autistic SWAT guy on the days I am told to be
 ALL UNITS RESPONDII!
 render first aid to down SGT because my old FTO is dead
 "IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOUI!"
 YOUR GONNNA FUCKING DIE!!!"
 >get to scene first and see my old FTO had gotten shot in the face and a SGT has been shot
 always at the dive bar in downtown and my command knows it
 one night, I get super drunk and cant drive home and decide hey im gonna walk home which is 3-5 miles way
 ers and the
 >get busted to CPL
 >leave SWAT team and other billets
 >other units get here and have to pull me off the SGT while they try to talk me down
 flailing about like a dumbass through the scene but the chiefs and higher brass let me because they think I am grieving
 told I should go home and change my uniforms and get a monster and start with the manhunt
 >l am seething and riving my car 100+ with lights back to my apartment
 >l curb it and park it at my apartment complex
 snew guys from Atlanta always fill the SGT billets and command always has "paperwork" issues with my packets
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:10:48 No.447952894506
 l robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:24:42 No.44794467
 4794597 22447948z
 thanks for listening ro
 p your dreams alive and always strive for greatness even if you think your not good
 wash up and call my GF and autistically ramble while I go into my gun closet and take out my pride and joy a M14 and start loading the magazines while screaming
 I have lurked her for years and don't plan to post OP threads anymore but I will definitely be lurking and commenting
 open the door in full police gear with a loaded m14 FUCK YOU BITCH!!!IMY FRIEND JUST DIED!"
 have a good day and drink a cold tall boy of PBR or NEwcastle for me
 lam the door in her face and load up my vest with a full combat load
 my car thats still running and curbed
 8 No 44796604244796736 44797003
 literally feeling autistic rage boiling in my
 b takes the bumper off and drive off
 >cops are pouring in from all over the southeast, there are abour 6 choppers in the air at any time
 >I have my rifle loaded and I am starting to flail my arms
 >literally no one cares that I am in an autistic rage
 finally get dispatched to public housing on e
 we are literally walking through the complex with AR's and in full combat gear like Iraq and yelling "IF you know anything about the police shooting there is a 10k award"
 Women and men are flipping us birds and we flip them back
 >my spaghetti is
4chan, Alive, and Anaconda: File: USCG POlice Kodiak Officers jpg (67 KB, 800x571 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:43:02 No.4479367644793873 44795495 about me an ro Be me 17 (2007) have odd ticks of flailing my hand and jumping up and down listening to music on my ipod and saying stupid shit at random times enlist in US Coast guard as Maritime specialist which is fancy talk for Coast guard cop go to basic and A-school and somehow dont spill my autism everywhere Robocop in /r9k/ ish go through a month at best of field training and then given a beat up crown Victoria to patrol the base and surronding areas which is mostly ghetto my autism starts to slowly bubble up when I am sitting in my car for 12 hours a day in between calls supporting the local police at domestics or stupid shit sitting in a empty parking lot off base and I start listening to my ipod start autistically dancing in my seat and screaming random nonsense >doing this for a few minutes and listening for radio checks or my call number /19/18(Thu)13.15.08 N IS ro its my senior enlisted aka chief of my station >he has a confused look rry sir, I was getting bored and let myself go >finish shift, go home and sleep ta re 28 No.44794809244794865 2244794916 2244794941 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:54:13 No.44793873244794005 9163 png (16 KB, 746x982) re >get asked questions, like do I want to kill people or hurt myself, voices etc >keep telling them, I was >get a call that night they have the suspect surronded >FBI,SWAT and everyone is there >suspect will not come out of the house unless he is on live TV >my chief looks at me and seems happy >"well Petty officer anon, I was worried you were a nutcase but I guess you were just actually bored get put back on duty >l show up and I am sitting on my car with my scope o nthe door On July 27th, 2015, the 37-year-old suspect was sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. >get job in large college town in Georgia but move in with my grandparents that live there >do my FTO training which is more of a formality since I am trained on a federal level >work downtown and mostly work the foot patrol but still have a car its peaceful but we know he is gonna get his ass beat in jail h academy t people are talking about how he didnt surrender because some guy was screaming "IM gonna fucking kill you" i nthe apartment complex the crime happened in >go to work the next day and get called into the Chiefs office >get told I am getting put on admin duty for causing damage to the car and for yelling at a citizen and will require a psych eval get eval and pass, get to keep my >literally spend the next 6 months downtown behind the bulletproof glass hearing about parking tickets and coffee being stolen librarian girl dumps me because "you have PTSD" >end up going to w autism is controlled and limited to my room at my grandparents all I do is drink and shitpost when I get home, my grandparents are treating me li an autistic fit and s >l say sorry and go to bed finally move out to apartment near downtown near famous tree and can see downtown and below me on the bottom of the hill is the public housing >get bright Idea get put back on footpatrol after 7 months on the desk >l deal with the homeless often and drink my self after my 6am to 3 pm watch >go to dive bar and become friends with odd guy that has OCD touretts become good frie >he literally snorts his adderall at the table but its a legit RX >become friends with all the people at the bars y airsoft rifle from izens of the publ >know their pattern:s I No.44794005 44794163 >24479428S start to know all the homeless, the locals and others become a well loved dude even by the liberals and anarchists start to watch and see patterns established by the people in public housing put rifle away and just watch from my porch on the third story with my binoculars while drinking PBR or some shitty beer in start remembering their faces and see them downtown asking for change I would say subtle stuff like "well I bet you have weed in your left pocket and you spent your last 10 on rotgut liquor from the korean package store on xyz street literally begin to autistically get to know what they do from 6pm-12 am while I watched them learn where the dealers live and end up connecting the dots to where the weapons are stolen from ome weaponized autism robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:50 49 No.44794941 >my GF loves my ticks and knows I keep it at home and not at work na get osesub"Sts robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:15:44 No.4479428544794714 raid dealers houses and talk shit while we do rumors flying around in public housing about some smart ass SWAT guy >develop a SWAT alter ego called "Swift response Autist tell my detective friend that I saw X and Y talking at certain point and tip them off >detectives are raking in stolen weapons and pounds of crack and meth off the street >everytime I hear about an arrest at home, I start violently flailing my hands and arms and scream in happiness my neighbor in my apartments calls the cops l open the door and its people I know and tell them "sorry, was the TV loud?" the sthoutlcing the LT lets me because it psychologically scares the suspects one raid I even took down a metal door with a crowbar without any help only do SWAT when needed and stay a nice little community policing cop on days I am not needed Swat in this city is elite and alot of cops dont know that X c my drinking problem remains steady and my friends and GF stay beside me and dont care about my little autistic ticks sorry anon, just turn it down and see y a SWAT cop and neither do the citizens continue my job, finallyget off my 1 year job probation and become a swat officeer >OH SHIT my AUTISM DAYS ARE BEHIND ME! fastforward to 2016 meet a beautiful librarian that is artistic and has a rocking body her and she >l start volunteering for library security details after work to talk to her robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:05:39 No.4479520444795281 224479536022447953772244795487 without sex she leaves i nthe morning but we plan to hit the bar after my shift flail around like a retard after she leaves and dance around my apartment while I put on my uniform (march 2011 own my grand promoted to SGT of the c still autistic SWAT guy on the days I am told to be >get to scene first and see my old FTO had gotten shot in the face and a SGT has been shot e my old FTO is dead always at the dive bar in downtown and my com ai e apartment c >one night, I get super drunk and cant drive home and decide hey im gonna walk home which is 3-5 miles way ers and the "YOUR GONNNA FUCKING DIEll!" other units get here and have to pull me off the SGT while they try to talk me down >leave SWAT team and other billets flailing about like a dumbass through the scene but the chiefs and higher brass let me because they think I am grieving told I should go home and change my uniforms and get a monster and start with the manhunt >l am seething and riving my car 100+ with lights back to my apartment >new guys from Atlanta always fill the SGT billets and command always has "paperwork" issues with my packets robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:10:48 No.4479528944795306 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:24:42 No.4479446744794597 44794837 thanks for listening robots, keep your dreams alive and always strive for greatness even if you think your not good wash up and call my GF and autistically ramble while I go into my gun closet and take out my pride and joy a M14 and start loading the magazines while screaming I have lurked her for years and don't plan to post OP threads anymore but I will definitely be lurking and commenting open the door in full police gear with a loaded m14"FUCK YOU BITCH!!! MY FRIEND JUST DIED!! have a good day and drink a cold tall boy of PBR or NEwcastle for me slam the door in her face and load up my vest Robocop 04/19/18(Thu)15:01:08 No.4479660444796736 3344797003 literally feeling autistic rage boiling in my b takes the bumper off and drive off >cops are pouring in from all over the southeast, there are abour 6 choppers in the air at any time The Halo 1/2 OST literally no one cares that I am in an autistic rage finally get dispatched to public housing on east side we are literally walking through the complex with AR's and in full combat gear like Iraq and yelling "IF you know anything about the police shooting there is a 10k award"
4chan, Alive, and Anaconda: File: USCG POlice Kodiak Officers jpg (67 KB, 800x571
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:43:02 No.4479367644793873 44795495
 about me an ro
 Be me 17 (2007) have odd ticks of flailing my hand and jumping up and down listening to music on my ipod and saying stupid shit at random times
 enlist in US Coast guard as Maritime specialist which is fancy talk for Coast guard cop
 go to basic and A-school and somehow dont spill my autism everywhere
 Robocop in /r9k/
 ish
 go through a month at best of field training and then given a beat up crown Victoria to patrol the base and surronding areas which is mostly ghetto
 my autism starts to slowly bubble up when I am sitting in my car for 12 hours a day in between calls supporting the local police at domestics or stupid shit
 sitting in a empty parking lot off base and I start listening to my ipod
 start autistically dancing in my seat and screaming random nonsense
 >doing this for a few minutes and listening for radio checks or my call number
 /19/18(Thu)13.15.08 N
 IS
 ro
 its my senior enlisted aka chief of my station
 >he has a confused look
 rry sir, I was getting bored and let myself go
 >finish shift,
 go home and sleep
 ta
 re
 28 No.44794809244794865 2244794916 2244794941
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)12:54:13 No.44793873244794005
 9163 png (16 KB, 746x982)
 re
 >get asked questions, like do I want to kill people or hurt myself, voices etc
 >keep telling them, I was
 >get a call that night they have the suspect surronded
 >FBI,SWAT and everyone is there
 >suspect will not come out of the house unless he is on live TV
 >my chief looks at me and seems happy
 >"well Petty officer anon, I was worried you were a nutcase but I guess you were just actually bored
 get put back on duty
 >l show up and I am sitting on my car with my scope o nthe door
 On July 27th, 2015, the 37-year-old suspect was sentenced to life
 in prison without the possibility of parole.
 >get job in large college town in Georgia but move in with my grandparents that live there
 >do my FTO training which is more of a formality since I am trained on a federal level
 >work downtown and mostly work the foot patrol but still have a car
 its peaceful but we know he is gonna get his ass beat in jail
 h academy t
 people are talking about how he didnt surrender because some guy was screaming "IM gonna fucking kill you" i nthe apartment complex the crime happened in
 >go to work the next day and get called into the Chiefs office
 >get told I am getting put on admin duty for causing damage to the car and for yelling at a citizen and will require a psych eval
 get eval and pass, get to keep my
 >literally spend the next 6 months downtown behind the bulletproof glass hearing about parking tickets and coffee being stolen
 librarian girl dumps me because "you have PTSD"
 >end up going to w
 autism is controlled and limited to my room at my grandparents
 all I do is drink and shitpost when I get home, my grandparents are treating me li
 an autistic fit and s
 >l
 say sorry and go to bed
 finally move out to apartment near downtown near famous tree and can see downtown and below me on the bottom of the hill is the public housing
 >get bright Idea
 get put back on footpatrol after 7 months on the desk
 >l deal with the homeless often and drink my self after my 6am to 3 pm watch
 >go to dive bar and become friends with odd guy that has OCD touretts
 become good frie
 >he literally snorts his adderall at the table but its a legit RX
 >become friends with all the people at the bars
 y airsoft rifle from
 izens of the publ
 >know their pattern:s
 I No.44794005
 44794163 >24479428S
 start to know all the homeless, the locals and others
 become a well loved dude even by the liberals and anarchists
 start to watch and see patterns established by the people in public housing
 put rifle away and just watch from my porch on the third story with my binoculars while drinking PBR or some shitty beer
 in
 start remembering their faces and see them downtown asking for change
 I would say subtle stuff like "well I bet you have weed in your left pocket and you spent your last 10 on rotgut liquor from the korean package store on xyz street
 literally begin to autistically get to know what they do from 6pm-12 am while I watched them
 learn where the dealers live and end up connecting the dots to where the weapons are stolen from
 ome weaponized autism
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:50 49 No.44794941
 >my GF loves my ticks and knows I keep it at home and not at work
 na get osesub"Sts
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:15:44 No.4479428544794714
 raid dealers houses and talk shit while we do
 rumors flying around in public housing about some smart ass SWAT guy
 >develop a SWAT alter ego called "Swift response Autist
 tell my detective friend that I saw X and Y talking at certain point and tip them off
 >detectives are raking in stolen weapons and pounds of crack and meth off the street
 >everytime I hear about an arrest at home, I start violently flailing my hands and arms and scream in happiness
 my neighbor in my apartments calls the cops
 l open the door and its people I know and tell them "sorry, was the TV loud?"
 the sthoutlcing
 the LT lets me because it psychologically scares the suspects
 one raid I even took down a metal door with a crowbar without any help
 only do SWAT when needed and stay a nice little community policing cop on days I am not needed
 Swat in this city is elite and alot of cops dont know that X c
 my drinking problem remains steady and my friends and GF stay beside me and dont care about my little autistic ticks
 sorry anon, just turn it down and see y
 a SWAT cop and neither do the citizens
 continue my job, finallyget off my 1 year job probation and become a swat officeer
 >OH SHIT my AUTISM DAYS ARE BEHIND ME!
 fastforward to 2016
 meet a beautiful librarian that is artistic and has a rocking body
 her and she
 >l start volunteering for library security details after work to talk to her
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:05:39 No.4479520444795281 224479536022447953772244795487
 without sex
 she leaves i nthe morning but we plan to hit the bar after my shift
 flail around like a retard after she leaves and dance around my apartment while I put on my uniform (march 2011
 own my grand
 promoted to SGT of the c
 still autistic SWAT guy on the days I am told to be
 >get to scene first and see my old FTO had gotten shot in the face and a SGT has been shot
 e my old FTO is dead
 always at the dive bar in downtown and my com
 ai
 e apartment c
 >one night, I get super drunk and cant drive home and decide hey im gonna walk home which is 3-5 miles way
 ers and the
 "YOUR GONNNA FUCKING DIEll!"
 other units get here and have to pull me off the SGT while they try to talk me down
 >leave SWAT team and other billets
 flailing about like a dumbass through the scene but the chiefs and higher brass let me because they think I am grieving
 told I should go home and change my uniforms and get a monster and start with the manhunt
 >l am seething and riving my car 100+ with lights back to my apartment
 >new guys from Atlanta always fill the SGT billets and command always has "paperwork" issues with my packets
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)14:10:48 No.4479528944795306
 robocop 04/19/18(Thu)13:24:42 No.4479446744794597 44794837
 thanks for listening robots, keep your dreams alive and always strive for greatness even if you think your not good
 wash up and call my GF and autistically ramble while I go into my gun closet and take out my pride and joy a M14 and start loading the magazines while screaming
 I have lurked her for years and don't plan to post OP threads anymore but I will definitely be lurking and commenting
 open the door in full police gear with a loaded m14"FUCK YOU BITCH!!! MY FRIEND JUST DIED!!
 have a good day and drink a cold tall boy of PBR or NEwcastle for me
 slam the door in her face and load up my vest
 Robocop 04/19/18(Thu)15:01:08 No.4479660444796736 3344797003
 literally feeling autistic rage boiling in my
 b takes the bumper off and drive off
 >cops are pouring in from all over the southeast, there are abour 6 choppers in the air at any time
 The Halo 1/2 OST
 literally no one cares that I am in an autistic rage
 finally get dispatched to public housing on east side
 we are literally walking through the complex with AR's and in full combat gear like Iraq and yelling "IF you know anything about the police shooting there is a 10k award"