Plans


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    
        

            

                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Telled
        

            
            Telled
        

    

    

         
Telled

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Your Plans
        

            
            Your Plans
        

    

    

         
Your Plans

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Caught
        

            
            Caught
        

    

    

         
Caught

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        I Need
        

            
            I Need
        

    

    

         
I Need

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Planning
        

            
            Planning
        

    

    

         
Planning

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Plan
        

            
            Plan
        

    

    

         
Plan

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Meetings
        

            
            Meetings
        

    

    

         
Meetings

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Performance
        

            
            Performance
        

    

    

         
Performance

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Suckes
        

            
            Suckes
        

    

    

         
Suckes

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Motheres
        

            
            Motheres
        

    

    

         
Motheres

    



                
            

        

    
    

        🔥 | Latest
    

    
    

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: theshitneyspears:

jewmingle:

“I had plans for the cranberry juice”

‘I’m Drunk’
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: theshitneyspears:

jewmingle:

“I had plans for the cranberry juice”

‘I’m Drunk’
                
                

                
            

            
            
theshitneyspears:

jewmingle:

“I had plans for the cranberry juice”

‘I’m Drunk’

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Everybody's plans are completely effed for the year. #Memes #Twitter #2020
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Everybody's plans are completely effed for the year. #Memes #Twitter #2020
                
            

            
            
Everybody's plans are completely effed for the year. #Memes #Twitter #2020

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Your dinner plans have changed…
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Your dinner plans have changed…
                
            

            
            
Your dinner plans have changed…

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: My boyfriend told me “Under no circumstances are you allowed to catch the bouquet”. Apparently God had other plans.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: My boyfriend told me “Under no circumstances are you allowed to catch the bouquet”. Apparently God had other plans.
                
            

            
            
My boyfriend told me “Under no circumstances are you allowed to catch the bouquet”. Apparently God had other plans.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Group plans be Like…
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Group plans be Like…
                
            

            
            
Group plans be Like…

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: bunjywunjy:
lostinhistory:

bidet-of-evil:

officialukulele:


nogoawayok:

penguinsstealingsanity:


that-ships-hellabig:


phanfruit:


krakkenchaos:

swindontownswoodilypooper:

petrovasinspace:

f-i-v-e-byfive:

thesixtysevenchevyimpala:

ilovecountryeverything:

titaniumbovine:

peaceroxi:

steveisoncrack:


HEY TUMBLR, LET’S PLAY A GAME
To play this game, go to MapCrunch, select “hide location”, make sure you have all countries unselected, and click go. What this will do is drop you in a random part of the world. It’s as if you woke up on the side of a road in an unfamiliar country. The goal of the game is to find your way to an airport so you can return home. 
Bonus Hard Mode: No using outside sources, and that includes using google maps to figure out your location from signs or landmarks

…I had plans today but now.

THE AIRPORT GAME IS BACK.

FUCK THIS GAME
LAST TIME I PLAYED IT DUMPED ME IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORWAY
I PLAYED FOR LIKE 8 HOURS BEFORE BREAKING DOWN CRYING

OMG NO STOP THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!!

IT’S BACK

WHY IS THIS BACK

WHYYYYY

oh shit

I HAVEN’T USED THIS GIF SINCE FEBRUARY


Always reblog Mapcrunch when someone tries to bring it back

it dropped me in a fucking room full of pandas


Ohmygod


It once dropped my in my home town a few km’s from the airport XD


i think this is gonna be a problem

i feel threatened also why is one of the cows blurred out who is she 


I’m trapped in a bathroom and i have no reflection 

I am on a dock by a bay



the last time I played this, it dumped me in the middle of a desert and when I turned the camera around it was literally standing next to the runway of an air force base

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: bunjywunjy:
lostinhistory:

bidet-of-evil:

officialukulele:


nogoawayok:

penguinsstealingsanity:


that-ships-hellabig:


phanfruit:


krakkenchaos:

swindontownswoodilypooper:

petrovasinspace:

f-i-v-e-byfive:

thesixtysevenchevyimpala:

ilovecountryeverything:

titaniumbovine:

peaceroxi:

steveisoncrack:


HEY TUMBLR, LET’S PLAY A GAME
To play this game, go to MapCrunch, select “hide location”, make sure you have all countries unselected, and click go. What this will do is drop you in a random part of the world. It’s as if you woke up on the side of a road in an unfamiliar country. The goal of the game is to find your way to an airport so you can return home. 
Bonus Hard Mode: No using outside sources, and that includes using google maps to figure out your location from signs or landmarks

…I had plans today but now.

THE AIRPORT GAME IS BACK.

FUCK THIS GAME
LAST TIME I PLAYED IT DUMPED ME IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORWAY
I PLAYED FOR LIKE 8 HOURS BEFORE BREAKING DOWN CRYING

OMG NO STOP THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!!

IT’S BACK

WHY IS THIS BACK

WHYYYYY

oh shit

I HAVEN’T USED THIS GIF SINCE FEBRUARY


Always reblog Mapcrunch when someone tries to bring it back

it dropped me in a fucking room full of pandas


Ohmygod


It once dropped my in my home town a few km’s from the airport XD


i think this is gonna be a problem

i feel threatened also why is one of the cows blurred out who is she 


I’m trapped in a bathroom and i have no reflection 

I am on a dock by a bay



the last time I played this, it dumped me in the middle of a desert and when I turned the camera around it was literally standing next to the runway of an air force base

                
            

            
            
bunjywunjy:
lostinhistory:

bidet-of-evil:

officialukulele:


nogoawayok:

penguinsstealingsanity:


that-ships-hellabig:


phanfruit:...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Plans for 2020
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Plans for 2020
                
            

            
            
Plans for 2020

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Plans for 2020
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Plans for 2020
                
            

            
            
Plans for 2020

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Weekend travel plans anyone?
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Weekend travel plans anyone?
                
            

            
            
Weekend travel plans anyone?

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: When all else fails, make humble plans
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: When all else fails, make humble plans
                
            

            
            
When all else fails, make humble plans

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Please make plans to Vote!
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Please make plans to Vote!
                
            

            
            
Please make plans to Vote!

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: And here I was making plans for marrying her.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: And here I was making plans for marrying her.
                
            

            
            
And here I was making plans for marrying her.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Me after cancelling my plans to spend my evening working out and eating good.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaholic.co  #fitness #motivation #workout #gymaholic #meme
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Me after cancelling my plans to spend my evening working out and eating good.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaholic.co  #fitness #motivation #workout #gymaholic #meme
                
            

            
            
Me after cancelling my plans to spend my evening working out and eating good.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaholic.co  #fitness #motivat...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: When my mother in law asks us what are our plans for Valentines Day
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: When my mother in law asks us what are our plans for Valentines Day
                
                

                
            

            
            
When my mother in law asks us what are our plans for Valentines Day

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: jayofolympus:
valsore:


silver-millennial:

mandalorianreynolds:


icantwritegood:

3hunnitcreditscore:

chantosakura:

cliomancer:

bunjywunjy:

rjzimmerman:

From the Facebook pages of Project Coyote/Classic Cars USA:
Last week on my way to work in the early morning, a coyote darted in front of my car and I hit it. I heard a crunch and believed I ran over and killed it. Upon stopping at a traffic light by my work, a construction woman notified me that there was in fact a coyote still embedded in my car. When I got out to look, this poor little guy was looking up and blinking at me. I notified Alberta fish and wildlife enforcement right away who came to rescue him. Miraculously, he was freed and had minimal injuries despite having hitched a ride from Airdrie to Calgary at highway speeds! Their biologist checked him over and gave him the good to go. They released him in Kananaskis. Clearly mother nature has other plans for this special little guy!-Georgie Knox

FOOD CHAIN, BABYYYyYyy

Plot-essential NPC.


I’m dying at the fact that he looks only like…mildly perturbed and inconvenienced by this at most.



“Well shit, this is not how I expected to spend my day”

the coyote on the highway like



I feel slightly bad for laughing so much…
But, uh, luck of a Trickster God indeed;



The roadrunner got away this time

Anyone can accidentally hit an animal. But you FUCKING STOP TO CHECK ON IT. Maybe it´s not dead, Maybe it´s injured and needs help, maybe he´s suffering. What the fuck is wrong with people! Not funny, not funny at all.



Sometimes it’s just not feasible to stop. If you’re on the highway or somewhere else where it would be dangerous to stop, then you just have to keep going and hope the animal is okay

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: jayofolympus:
valsore:


silver-millennial:

mandalorianreynolds:


icantwritegood:

3hunnitcreditscore:

chantosakura:

cliomancer:

bunjywunjy:

rjzimmerman:

From the Facebook pages of Project Coyote/Classic Cars USA:
Last week on my way to work in the early morning, a coyote darted in front of my car and I hit it. I heard a crunch and believed I ran over and killed it. Upon stopping at a traffic light by my work, a construction woman notified me that there was in fact a coyote still embedded in my car. When I got out to look, this poor little guy was looking up and blinking at me. I notified Alberta fish and wildlife enforcement right away who came to rescue him. Miraculously, he was freed and had minimal injuries despite having hitched a ride from Airdrie to Calgary at highway speeds! Their biologist checked him over and gave him the good to go. They released him in Kananaskis. Clearly mother nature has other plans for this special little guy!-Georgie Knox

FOOD CHAIN, BABYYYyYyy

Plot-essential NPC.


I’m dying at the fact that he looks only like…mildly perturbed and inconvenienced by this at most.



“Well shit, this is not how I expected to spend my day”

the coyote on the highway like



I feel slightly bad for laughing so much…
But, uh, luck of a Trickster God indeed;



The roadrunner got away this time

Anyone can accidentally hit an animal. But you FUCKING STOP TO CHECK ON IT. Maybe it´s not dead, Maybe it´s injured and needs help, maybe he´s suffering. What the fuck is wrong with people! Not funny, not funny at all.



Sometimes it’s just not feasible to stop. If you’re on the highway or somewhere else where it would be dangerous to stop, then you just have to keep going and hope the animal is okay

                
            

            
            
jayofolympus:
valsore:


silver-millennial:

mandalorianreynolds:


icantwritegood:

3hunnitcreditscore:

chantosakura:

cliomancer:

bun...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: “I’ve foil’d your plans” [oc]
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: “I’ve foil’d your plans” [oc]
                
            

            
            
“I’ve foil’d your plans” [oc]

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: khadij-al-kubra:

tooiconic:

fuckyeahyonicsymbols:

dorkilybeautiful:

blackmoonbabe:

brain-confetti:

nightvalemeteorologist:

suctioning:

Why

She had a dream and she realized it.


Hey wait but sit down
This is Megumi Igarashi


She’s a Japanese artist
Japan, the country with some of the most fucked up pornography and the penis festival
Where the vagina is basically illegal to talk about 
So she did a bunch of art featuring 3D sculptures of her vagina, including this kayak, and was put in jail for it
She was indicted again in December on obscenity charges for selling vagina art to crowdfund for the kayak and could spend two years in prison
In Japan, women’s vaginas are treated as though they are men’s property. The trains here usually display pornographic advertisements. As a woman, I find that blatant objectification to be humiliating. I’m disgusted by it. My body belongs to me.So, with this project I wanted to release the vagina from the standard Japanese paradigm. Japan is lenient towards expressions of male sexuality and arousal, but not so for women. When a woman uses her body in artistic expression, her work gets ignored, and people treat her as if she’s some sex-crazed idiot. It all comes back to misogyny. And the vagina is at the heart of it.The vagina is ridiculed. It’s lusted after. Men don’t see women as equals—to them, women are just vaginas. Then they call my vagina-themed work “obscene,” and judge me according to laws written by and for men. [x]
She plans to turn her trial in to a manga comic. She seems pretty sure she’s not going to do any jail time but if you’d like to help her pay for her inevitable fine and court fees, you can check out her online store. There are little glow in the dark vagina characters.

Wow I’ve seen this reblogged a ton of times without seeing the whole going to jail part. 

Here’s a recent article about her from July of 2017.  It looks like she did some brief time in jail, and is currently still working on this artistic effort, as well as trying to raise awareness about a new terrorism law and the jail/prison system in Japan. 


Reblogging again for the updates!


I went from “wow why” to “YES GIRL” in 2 min.

Viva la vulva
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: khadij-al-kubra:

tooiconic:

fuckyeahyonicsymbols:

dorkilybeautiful:

blackmoonbabe:

brain-confetti:

nightvalemeteorologist:

suctioning:

Why

She had a dream and she realized it.


Hey wait but sit down
This is Megumi Igarashi


She’s a Japanese artist
Japan, the country with some of the most fucked up pornography and the penis festival
Where the vagina is basically illegal to talk about 
So she did a bunch of art featuring 3D sculptures of her vagina, including this kayak, and was put in jail for it
She was indicted again in December on obscenity charges for selling vagina art to crowdfund for the kayak and could spend two years in prison
In Japan, women’s vaginas are treated as though they are men’s property. The trains here usually display pornographic advertisements. As a woman, I find that blatant objectification to be humiliating. I’m disgusted by it. My body belongs to me.So, with this project I wanted to release the vagina from the standard Japanese paradigm. Japan is lenient towards expressions of male sexuality and arousal, but not so for women. When a woman uses her body in artistic expression, her work gets ignored, and people treat her as if she’s some sex-crazed idiot. It all comes back to misogyny. And the vagina is at the heart of it.The vagina is ridiculed. It’s lusted after. Men don’t see women as equals—to them, women are just vaginas. Then they call my vagina-themed work “obscene,” and judge me according to laws written by and for men. [x]
She plans to turn her trial in to a manga comic. She seems pretty sure she’s not going to do any jail time but if you’d like to help her pay for her inevitable fine and court fees, you can check out her online store. There are little glow in the dark vagina characters.

Wow I’ve seen this reblogged a ton of times without seeing the whole going to jail part. 

Here’s a recent article about her from July of 2017.  It looks like she did some brief time in jail, and is currently still working on this artistic effort, as well as trying to raise awareness about a new terrorism law and the jail/prison system in Japan. 


Reblogging again for the updates!


I went from “wow why” to “YES GIRL” in 2 min.

Viva la vulva
                
            

            
            
khadij-al-kubra:

tooiconic:

fuckyeahyonicsymbols:

dorkilybeautiful:

blackmoonbabe:

brain-confetti:

nightvalemeteorologist:

suction...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)



Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)



Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.

                
            

            
            
lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: Me telling my friends I have big plans for the weekend so I can work out in peace instead of partying.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaholic.co  #fitness #motivation #meme #workout #gymaholic
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: Me telling my friends I have big plans for the weekend so I can work out in peace instead of partying.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaholic.co  #fitness #motivation #meme #workout #gymaholic
                
            

            
            
Me telling my friends I have big plans for the weekend so I can work out in peace instead of partying.  Gymaholic App: https://www.gymaho...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: So You're Confronting Your Own Mortality
 or
 Preparing for the End
 or
 Some Dipshit Up and Died and Now I'm
 Stuck Dealing With This Mess
ms-demeanor:

ms-demeanor:
ms-demeanor:


jhinnua:

ms-demeanor:

Hey you know how I said I was going to make a workbook on the kind of bullshit you need to do when someone you love dies? I actually did that.
HERE IS THE VERSION WITH LOTS OF SWEARING AT THE USELESS, SHITTY SITUATION YOU’RE IN.
HERE IS THE VERSION WITH A FAIR AMOUNT OF BLACK HUMOR BUT NO CURSEWORDS.
Featuring Helpful Sections such as: 
Death Certificates – What you need, why you need them, and
how to get them
Prepare to spend a long and miserable time on the phone
What the Everloving Fuck is Probate
Some Simple Dos and Don’ts
Shitty Mad Libs – Templates for writing Obituaries and
Memorials
How to plan a non-religious death party
So you suddenly have to become some sort of hacker or some
shit

This is an eighteen page book that you can print out, download, share, and give away; it is meant to be used to collect information about funeral planning and account management after a death OR you can use it BEFORE you die and give people information so they’re not stuck playing Nancy Fucking Drew while trying to keep seventeen cousins who crawled out of the woodwork from gutting each other in front of the fucking casket as they argue about who’s inheriting grandma’s favorite dentures. 
It’s not exactly cheerful and it’s full of things that are probably going to feel really fucking raw if you’re processing a fresh death.
I’m sorry! I love you! Death is shitty! I’m trying to laugh about it a little and I hope you can laugh a little too because otherwise we’re all just going to cry together.
Good luck!
(in memory of my weirdo mother and her weirdo siblings who all died too fucking young and left me holding this flaming bag of dogshit)


@ms-demeanor Tumblr wont let me message you privately, so is it ok if I share this to my FB page? The business I am in wants information like this to be public knowledge, but it’s still a business so I don’t want to post without permission.

YES, please share it!
And actually facebook blocks links to my blog for some reason so I have no problem with you just straight-up copy/pasting the PDF links! Credit me if you want (”@ms-demeanor on tumblr” is fine) but you don’t even have to. Just share it and spread it I want people to have an easier time of things! I’m universally  OK if people share these links so long as you’re not selling the booklet. I’m actually even okay if someone prints up a bunch of these and hands them out so long as they’re handed out for free. 


Also I want to make this point: I was very lucky. I had talked to my mom about her death plans and she and my dad have had their cremations planned and paid for for 25 years (Neptune Society baybee). I got lucky, we had talked about a book like this and she had started writing down passwords. I got lucky, she never took my advice about putting a passcode on her phone. 
But things were still harder than they needed to be. We’d talked about a death planning workbook because I’d found one on Amazon and we both thought it would be a good idea to fill it out because she was sick. 
I just never scrounged together $26.00 in the time between when we talked about it and when she died.
You know what’s better than regretting that you couldn’t afford a death workbook? A FREE DEATH WORKBOOK.
I mean, I don’t begrudge the authors of other death books their pay. I’m sure the other books are more comprehensive than mine and maybe some of them do a decent job of explaining probate.
But death is expensive and living ain’t cheap.
This is free explicitly because there are tons of people (though certainly not everyone involved) who will bypass compassion in order to profit off of the death industry and I want you to have at least this one thing that’s there for you free, as a gift, as something given to you for the sole purpose of making this easier on you in a time when every step is going to be expensive and difficult. 
This is free, no charge. All I ask is that, if possible, you share it with someone else who needs it and that you tell somebody you love that you love them. 

Hey all if you’re new here because of the firefox post or the browser wars post or the bastardous positivity post please consider downloading the free book I made about what to do when someone dies because you know what this is sad and shit but things are going to be much easier for you if you know the level of bullshit you’re going to be dealing with. 
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: So You're Confronting Your Own Mortality
 or
 Preparing for the End
 or
 Some Dipshit Up and Died and Now I'm
 Stuck Dealing With This Mess
ms-demeanor:

ms-demeanor:
ms-demeanor:


jhinnua:

ms-demeanor:

Hey you know how I said I was going to make a workbook on the kind of bullshit you need to do when someone you love dies? I actually did that.
HERE IS THE VERSION WITH LOTS OF SWEARING AT THE USELESS, SHITTY SITUATION YOU’RE IN.
HERE IS THE VERSION WITH A FAIR AMOUNT OF BLACK HUMOR BUT NO CURSEWORDS.
Featuring Helpful Sections such as: 
Death Certificates – What you need, why you need them, and
how to get them
Prepare to spend a long and miserable time on the phone
What the Everloving Fuck is Probate
Some Simple Dos and Don’ts
Shitty Mad Libs – Templates for writing Obituaries and
Memorials
How to plan a non-religious death party
So you suddenly have to become some sort of hacker or some
shit

This is an eighteen page book that you can print out, download, share, and give away; it is meant to be used to collect information about funeral planning and account management after a death OR you can use it BEFORE you die and give people information so they’re not stuck playing Nancy Fucking Drew while trying to keep seventeen cousins who crawled out of the woodwork from gutting each other in front of the fucking casket as they argue about who’s inheriting grandma’s favorite dentures. 
It’s not exactly cheerful and it’s full of things that are probably going to feel really fucking raw if you’re processing a fresh death.
I’m sorry! I love you! Death is shitty! I’m trying to laugh about it a little and I hope you can laugh a little too because otherwise we’re all just going to cry together.
Good luck!
(in memory of my weirdo mother and her weirdo siblings who all died too fucking young and left me holding this flaming bag of dogshit)


@ms-demeanor Tumblr wont let me message you privately, so is it ok if I share this to my FB page? The business I am in wants information like this to be public knowledge, but it’s still a business so I don’t want to post without permission.

YES, please share it!
And actually facebook blocks links to my blog for some reason so I have no problem with you just straight-up copy/pasting the PDF links! Credit me if you want (”@ms-demeanor on tumblr” is fine) but you don’t even have to. Just share it and spread it I want people to have an easier time of things! I’m universally  OK if people share these links so long as you’re not selling the booklet. I’m actually even okay if someone prints up a bunch of these and hands them out so long as they’re handed out for free. 


Also I want to make this point: I was very lucky. I had talked to my mom about her death plans and she and my dad have had their cremations planned and paid for for 25 years (Neptune Society baybee). I got lucky, we had talked about a book like this and she had started writing down passwords. I got lucky, she never took my advice about putting a passcode on her phone. 
But things were still harder than they needed to be. We’d talked about a death planning workbook because I’d found one on Amazon and we both thought it would be a good idea to fill it out because she was sick. 
I just never scrounged together $26.00 in the time between when we talked about it and when she died.
You know what’s better than regretting that you couldn’t afford a death workbook? A FREE DEATH WORKBOOK.
I mean, I don’t begrudge the authors of other death books their pay. I’m sure the other books are more comprehensive than mine and maybe some of them do a decent job of explaining probate.
But death is expensive and living ain’t cheap.
This is free explicitly because there are tons of people (though certainly not everyone involved) who will bypass compassion in order to profit off of the death industry and I want you to have at least this one thing that’s there for you free, as a gift, as something given to you for the sole purpose of making this easier on you in a time when every step is going to be expensive and difficult. 
This is free, no charge. All I ask is that, if possible, you share it with someone else who needs it and that you tell somebody you love that you love them. 

Hey all if you’re new here because of the firefox post or the browser wars post or the bastardous positivity post please consider downloading the free book I made about what to do when someone dies because you know what this is sad and shit but things are going to be much easier for you if you know the level of bullshit you’re going to be dealing with. 
                
            

            
            
ms-demeanor:

ms-demeanor:
ms-demeanor:


jhinnua:

ms-demeanor:

Hey you know how I said I was going to make a workbook on the kind of b...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Plans: 5 MINUTES LATER
pulmonary-poultry:

jackhawksmoor:

pitbullmabari:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

boogabeing:

aenramsden:

luna-forever-1:
😂
You have to admire her audacity, if nothing else.

Literally my favourite thing about Rogue One is that it makes the opening of New Hope so funny. Like, Vader has followed Leia from a planet he just blew up seconds ago and pursued her across the galaxy and then she’s just like: ‘I’m on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan’
Vader: You’re a rebel. I just had a fight with your entire rebel fleet and followed you here. Straight from the rebels. Of which you are a part
Leia: *dramatic gasp* rebel? Me???  I was just passing through. Diplomatically. Thought it was a five-space-ship pile-up or something going on there… 

death star plans? on my alderaanian diplomatic mission?it’s more likely than you think


ok but this is like legitimate Canon Improvement because I’d always wondered why Vader was so wildly furious at the start of the movie like “rahhhhh bring me the passengers I WANT THEM ALIVE!!!!” and now I’m like
ohh yeah okay they literally JUST blew up Vader’s base, stole his sh!t, and took off while giving him the finger from the window



Leia being a lot more smug than she has any right to be: I’m a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan-Vader nearly in tears from frustration: YOU ARE PART OF THE REBEL ALLIANCE AND A TRAITOR TAKE HER AWAY
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Plans: 5 MINUTES LATER
pulmonary-poultry:

jackhawksmoor:

pitbullmabari:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

boogabeing:

aenramsden:

luna-forever-1:
😂
You have to admire her audacity, if nothing else.

Literally my favourite thing about Rogue One is that it makes the opening of New Hope so funny. Like, Vader has followed Leia from a planet he just blew up seconds ago and pursued her across the galaxy and then she’s just like: ‘I’m on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan’
Vader: You’re a rebel. I just had a fight with your entire rebel fleet and followed you here. Straight from the rebels. Of which you are a part
Leia: *dramatic gasp* rebel? Me???  I was just passing through. Diplomatically. Thought it was a five-space-ship pile-up or something going on there… 

death star plans? on my alderaanian diplomatic mission?it’s more likely than you think


ok but this is like legitimate Canon Improvement because I’d always wondered why Vader was so wildly furious at the start of the movie like “rahhhhh bring me the passengers I WANT THEM ALIVE!!!!” and now I’m like
ohh yeah okay they literally JUST blew up Vader’s base, stole his sh!t, and took off while giving him the finger from the window



Leia being a lot more smug than she has any right to be: I’m a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan-Vader nearly in tears from frustration: YOU ARE PART OF THE REBEL ALLIANCE AND A TRAITOR TAKE HER AWAY
                
            

            
            
pulmonary-poultry:

jackhawksmoor:

pitbullmabari:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

boogabeing:

aenramsden:

luna-forever-1:
😂
You have...