Frowning
Frowning

Frowning

Hurtfully
Hurtfully

Hurtfully

Impersonable
Impersonable

Impersonable

Meme Smile
Meme Smile

Meme Smile

no-muscles
no-muscles

no-muscles

skeletal
 skeletal

skeletal

impersonal
impersonal

impersonal

yours
yours

yours

oed
oed

oed

faced
faced

faced

🔥 | Latest

Too Much, Tumblr, and Blog: fiyahacts fiyaharts: i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!
Too Much, Tumblr, and Blog: fiyahacts
fiyaharts:

i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!

fiyaharts: i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!

Food, God, and Lol: ubercharge: sindri42: bettsplendens: dallasrecklessandrelentless: That fuckin smile at the end To the worried person in the comments:  No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink, which is a Pokemon that supposedly powers its heart by bouncing, and as such can’t stop moving. Hummingbirds don’t sit often because they’re busy looking for food, but they can and do sit. The females sit on eggs in nests, after all, and they do have to sleep.  Fun fact: the leg muscles of a hummingbird are so stripped down to save on weight that they cannot walk. They can step sideways along a branch or other perch, but they cannot go forward without taking flight. However they absolutely do stop moving. In fact, hummingbirds hibernate! Overnight. Instead of sleeping. Because if they tried to sleep like a normal animal their hyperactive metabolism would mean that they starve to death before breakfast. Unrelated fun fact: the primary Aztec god of war would take on the form of a hummingbird, and the souls of the bravest warriors were said to turn into hummingbirds in order to join him after death, presumably because every hummingbird is approximately four grams of pure concentrated asskicking which fears no man nor beast and will gladly throw down with somebody seventeen thousand times their size if offended. this is a really cool post and i love seeing such a small bird but reading “No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink” killed me 
Food, God, and Lol: ubercharge:
sindri42:

bettsplendens:

dallasrecklessandrelentless:
That fuckin smile at the end
To the worried person in the comments: 
No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink, which is a Pokemon that supposedly powers its heart by bouncing, and as such can’t stop moving. Hummingbirds don’t sit often because they’re busy looking for food, but they can and do sit. The females sit on eggs in nests, after all, and they do have to sleep. 

Fun fact: the leg muscles of a hummingbird are so stripped down to save on weight that they cannot walk. They can step sideways along a branch or other perch, but they cannot go forward without taking flight.
However they absolutely do stop moving. In fact, hummingbirds hibernate! Overnight. Instead of sleeping. Because if they tried to sleep like a normal animal their hyperactive metabolism would mean that they starve to death before breakfast.
Unrelated fun fact: the primary Aztec god of war would take on the form of a hummingbird, and the souls of the bravest warriors were said to turn into hummingbirds in order to join him after death, presumably because every hummingbird is approximately four grams of pure concentrated asskicking which fears no man nor beast and will gladly throw down with somebody seventeen thousand times their size if offended.

this is a really cool post and i love seeing such a small bird but reading “No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink” killed me 

ubercharge: sindri42: bettsplendens: dallasrecklessandrelentless: That fuckin smile at the end To the worried person in the comments:  No,...

Assassination, Definitely, and England: 50 THINGS YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW "1- RUBBER BANDS LAST LONGER WHEN REFRIGERATED 2-PEANUTS ARE ONE OF THE INGREDIENTS OF DYNAMITE 3- THERE ARE 293 WAYS TO MAKE CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR * 4-THE AVERAGE PERSON'S LEFT HAND DOES 56% OF THE TYPING 5- A SHARK IS THE ONLY FISH THAT CAN BLINK WITH BOTH EYES. 6- THERE ARE MORE CHICKENS THAN PEOPLE IN THE WORLD 7- THE LONGEST ONE-SYLLABLE WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS "SCREECHED. 8- ON A CANADIAN TWO-DOLLAR BILL, THE FLAG FLYING OVER THE PARLIAMENT BUILDING IS AN AMERICAN FLAG. 9- ALL OF THE CLOCKS IN THE MOVIE "PULP FICTION" ARE STUCK ON 4:20 10 NO WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE RHYMES WITH MONTH, ORANGE, SILVER OR PURPLE 11-"DREAMT IS THE ONLY ENGLISH WORD THAT ENDS IN THE LETTERS "MT 12-ALMONDS ARE A MEMBER OF THE PEACH FAMILY 13- THERE ARE ONLY 4 WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WHICH END IN DOUS TREMENDOUS, HORRENDOUS, STUPENDOUS, AND HAZARDOUS 14-A CAT HAS 32 MUSCLES IN EACH EAR. " 15- AN OSTRICH'S EYE IS BIGGER THAN ITS BRAIN 16- TIGERS HAVE STRIPED SKIN, NOT JUST STRIPED FUR. " 17- IN MOST ADVERTISEMENTS, THE TIME DISPLAYED ON A WATCH IS 10:10 18- AL CAPONE'S BUSINESS CARD SAID HE WAS A USED FURNITURE DEALER " 19- THE CHARACTERS BERT & ERNIE ON SESAME STREET WERE NAMED AFTER BERT THE COP AND ERNIE THE TAXI DRIVER IN FRANK CAPRA'S "ITS A WONDERFULLIFE 20- A DRAGONFLY HAS A LIFE SPAN OF 1-6 MONTHS 21- A GOLDFISH HAS A MEMORY SPAN OF 3 SECONDS 22- ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO SNEEZE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN. 23- THE GIANT SQUID HAS THE LARGEST EYES IN THE WORLD 24- IN ENGLAND, THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK. 25- THE MICROWAVE WAS INVENTED AFTER A RESEARCHER WALKED BY A RADAR TUBE AND A CHOCOLATE BAR MELTED IN HIS POCKE 26- THE AVERAGE PERSON FALLS ASLEEP IN SEVEN MINUTES. 27- THERE ARE 336 DIMPLES ON A REGULATION GOLF BALL 28-THE AVERAGE HUMAN EATS 8 SPIDERS IN THEIR LIFETIME AT NIGHT 29- A COCKROACH CAN LIVE NINE DAYS WITHOUT ITS HEAD BEFORE IT STARVES TO DEATH 30- A POLAR BEAR'S SKIN IS BLACK. ITS FUR IS NOT WHITE, BUT ACTUALLY CLEAR. 31- ELVIS HAD A TWIN BROTHER NAMED AARON, WHO DIED AT BIRTH, WHICH IS WHY ELVIS MIDDLE NAME WAS SPELLED ARON: IN HONOR OF HIS BROTHER. IT IS ALSO MIS SPELLED ON HIS TOMB STONE 32- DONALD DUCK COMICS WERE BANNED IN FINLAND BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WEAR PANTS 33- MORE PEOPLE ARE KILLED BY DONKEYS ANNUALLY THAN ARE KILLED IN PLANE CRASHES. 34- STEWARDESSES IS THE LONGEST WORD TYPED WITH ONLY THE LEFT HAND. 35- SHAKESPEARE INVENTED THE WORDS "ASSASSINATION" AND "BUMP." 36- MARILYN MONROE HAD 6 TOES ON ONE FOOT. (NOT TRUE, WE'RE TOLDI) 37- IF YOU KEEP A GOLDFISH IN THE DARK ROOM, IT WILL EVENTUALLY TURN WHITE. 38-WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN 39- RIGHT-HANDED PEOPLE LIVE, ON AVERAGE, NINE YEARS LONGER THAN LEFT HANDED PEOPLE DO *40- THE SENTENCE "THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE LAZY DOG USES EVERY LETTER IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE *41- THE NAMES OF THE CONTINENTS ALL END WITH THE SAME LETTER WITH WHICH THEY START 42- TYPEWRITER IS THE LONGEST WORD THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS ON ONLY ONE ROW OF THE KEYBOARD 43- THE WORD RACECAR AND KAYAK ARE THE SAME WHETHER THEY ARE READ LEFT TO RIGHT OR RIGHT TO LEFT 44- A SNAIL CAN SLEEP FOR 3 YEARS 45- AMERICAN AIRLINES SAVED $40,000 IN 1987 BY ELIMINATING ONE OLIVE FROM EACH SALAD SERVED IN FIRST-CLASS 46- THE ELECTRIC CHAIR WAS INVENTED BY A DENTIST 47- VATICAN CITY IS THE SMALLEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD WITH A POPULATION OF 1,000 AND A SIZE OF 108.7 ACRES 48-"I AM" IS THE SHORTEST COMPLETE SENTENCE IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE * 49- NO PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES WAS AN ONLY CHILD AND LAST AND DEFINITELY MOST IMPORTANT 50- THE AVERAGE CHOCOLATE BAR HAS 8 INSECTS LEGS IN IT l KNOW SO MUCH NOW lolmeme.th Some of these are not true, but wich ones?
Assassination, Definitely, and England: 50 THINGS YOU DON'T
 NEED TO KNOW
 "1- RUBBER BANDS LAST LONGER WHEN REFRIGERATED
 2-PEANUTS ARE ONE OF THE INGREDIENTS OF DYNAMITE
 3- THERE ARE 293 WAYS TO MAKE CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR
 * 4-THE AVERAGE PERSON'S LEFT HAND DOES 56% OF THE TYPING
 5- A SHARK IS THE ONLY FISH THAT CAN BLINK WITH BOTH EYES.
 6- THERE ARE MORE CHICKENS THAN PEOPLE IN THE WORLD
 7- THE LONGEST ONE-SYLLABLE WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS "SCREECHED.
 8- ON A CANADIAN TWO-DOLLAR BILL, THE FLAG FLYING OVER THE PARLIAMENT
 BUILDING IS AN AMERICAN FLAG.
 9- ALL OF THE CLOCKS IN THE MOVIE "PULP FICTION" ARE STUCK ON 4:20
 10 NO WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE RHYMES WITH MONTH, ORANGE, SILVER OR
 PURPLE
 11-"DREAMT IS THE ONLY ENGLISH WORD THAT ENDS IN THE LETTERS "MT
 12-ALMONDS ARE A MEMBER OF THE PEACH FAMILY
 13- THERE ARE ONLY 4 WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WHICH END IN DOUS
 TREMENDOUS, HORRENDOUS, STUPENDOUS, AND HAZARDOUS
 14-A CAT HAS 32 MUSCLES IN EACH EAR.
 " 15- AN OSTRICH'S EYE IS BIGGER THAN ITS BRAIN
 16- TIGERS HAVE STRIPED SKIN, NOT JUST STRIPED FUR.
 " 17- IN MOST ADVERTISEMENTS, THE TIME DISPLAYED ON A WATCH IS 10:10
 18- AL CAPONE'S BUSINESS CARD SAID HE WAS A USED FURNITURE DEALER
 " 19- THE CHARACTERS BERT & ERNIE ON SESAME STREET WERE NAMED AFTER BERT
 THE COP AND ERNIE THE TAXI DRIVER IN FRANK CAPRA'S "ITS A WONDERFULLIFE
 20- A DRAGONFLY HAS A LIFE SPAN OF 1-6 MONTHS
 21- A GOLDFISH HAS A MEMORY SPAN OF 3 SECONDS
 22- ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO SNEEZE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN.
 23- THE GIANT SQUID HAS THE LARGEST EYES IN THE WORLD
 24- IN ENGLAND, THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK.
 25- THE MICROWAVE WAS INVENTED AFTER A RESEARCHER WALKED BY A RADAR
 TUBE AND A CHOCOLATE BAR MELTED IN HIS POCKE
 26- THE AVERAGE PERSON FALLS ASLEEP IN SEVEN MINUTES.
 27- THERE ARE 336 DIMPLES ON A REGULATION GOLF BALL
 28-THE AVERAGE HUMAN EATS 8 SPIDERS IN THEIR LIFETIME AT NIGHT
 29- A COCKROACH CAN LIVE NINE DAYS WITHOUT ITS HEAD BEFORE IT STARVES TO
 DEATH
 30- A POLAR BEAR'S SKIN IS BLACK. ITS FUR IS NOT WHITE, BUT ACTUALLY CLEAR.
 31- ELVIS HAD A TWIN BROTHER NAMED AARON, WHO DIED AT BIRTH, WHICH IS WHY
 ELVIS MIDDLE NAME WAS SPELLED ARON: IN HONOR OF HIS BROTHER. IT IS ALSO MIS
 SPELLED ON HIS TOMB STONE
 32- DONALD DUCK COMICS WERE BANNED IN FINLAND BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WEAR
 PANTS
 33- MORE PEOPLE ARE KILLED BY DONKEYS ANNUALLY THAN ARE KILLED IN PLANE
 CRASHES.
 34- STEWARDESSES IS THE LONGEST WORD TYPED WITH ONLY THE LEFT HAND. 35-
 SHAKESPEARE INVENTED THE WORDS "ASSASSINATION" AND "BUMP."
 36- MARILYN MONROE HAD 6 TOES ON ONE FOOT. (NOT TRUE, WE'RE TOLDI)
 37- IF YOU KEEP A GOLDFISH IN THE DARK ROOM, IT WILL EVENTUALLY TURN WHITE.
 38-WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN
 39- RIGHT-HANDED PEOPLE LIVE, ON AVERAGE, NINE YEARS LONGER THAN LEFT
 HANDED PEOPLE DO
 *40- THE SENTENCE "THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE LAZY DOG USES
 EVERY LETTER IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE
 *41- THE NAMES OF THE CONTINENTS ALL END WITH THE SAME LETTER WITH WHICH
 THEY START
 42- TYPEWRITER IS THE LONGEST WORD THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS ON
 ONLY ONE ROW OF THE KEYBOARD
 43- THE WORD RACECAR AND KAYAK ARE THE SAME WHETHER THEY ARE READ LEFT
 TO RIGHT OR RIGHT TO LEFT
 44- A SNAIL CAN SLEEP FOR 3 YEARS
 45- AMERICAN AIRLINES SAVED $40,000 IN 1987 BY ELIMINATING ONE OLIVE FROM
 EACH SALAD SERVED IN FIRST-CLASS
 46- THE ELECTRIC CHAIR WAS INVENTED BY A DENTIST
 47- VATICAN CITY IS THE SMALLEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD WITH A POPULATION OF
 1,000 AND A SIZE OF 108.7 ACRES
 48-"I AM" IS THE SHORTEST COMPLETE SENTENCE IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE
 * 49- NO PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES WAS AN ONLY CHILD
 AND LAST AND DEFINITELY MOST IMPORTANT
 50- THE AVERAGE CHOCOLATE BAR HAS 8 INSECTS LEGS IN IT
 l KNOW SO
 MUCH NOW
 lolmeme.th
Some of these are not true, but wich ones?

Some of these are not true, but wich ones?

Af, America, and Apparently: Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men are as objectified as women on TV actor has joined the debate genders are judged equally on looks about objectification in TVand L4 butterflyinthewell: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us. I would hate to think of what Dave Bautista had to go through since he was shirtless the entire time as Drax. All that makeup plus dieting….yikes! Also, let’s not forget that men can get eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia too.
Af, America, and Apparently: Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men
 are as objectified as women on TV
 actor has joined the debate
 genders are judged equally on looks
 about objectification in TVand
 L4
butterflyinthewell:

shipperwolf1:

brunhiddensmusings:

fierceawakening:

guyveranimefan87:

eric-coldfire:

eldritchgentleman:

cruxofargon:

the-critical-feminist:

cishetwhiteoppressor:

Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit.
Source

My god I love her.

I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT.
When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. 
Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”.
The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. 
Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist.

You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. 

Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex.

If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here.
Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he?
Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”. 
Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular.
As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!”
It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better.
According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables. 
Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%…
… But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time.
I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then…
There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration…
And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia
Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder…
So… Thanks Hollywood?


I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this.

dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting

real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent 
guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us.


I would hate to think of what Dave Bautista had to go through since he was shirtless the entire time as Drax. All that makeup plus dieting….yikes!
Also, let’s not forget that men can get eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia too.

butterflyinthewell: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargo...

Alive, Animals, and Bad: mithsonian smithchan.com/monsters nake CHANNELmanstersrake 02012 SNUSI Networks LL.C. All rights reserved Smithson legitimatelala: lokiwtf: gallizfrey: anneriawings: siphersaysstuff: honey-andrevolution: sashayed: silvermoon424: poppypicklesticks: billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro: cosmicallycosmopolitan: billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro: james-winston: The Titanoboa, is a 48ft long snake dating from around 60-58million years ago. It had a rib cage 2ft wide, allowing it to eat whole crocodiles, and surrounding the ribcage were muscles so powerful that it could crush a rhino. Titanoboa was so big it couldn’t even spend long amounts of time on land, because the force of gravity acting on it would cause it to suffocate under its own weight. I’m so glad they aren’t around omg me too. I’m scared enough of 26 ft long anacondas. I’m so happy Megalodons, those giant sharks, aren’t alive either Praise natural selection I remember watching Walking with Beasts or something similar, or some British tv show about evolution The subject was something like a 12 foot long water scorpion I was so startled by its sudden appearance and narration that I yelped: “12 fucking feet?!?!  I’m fucking glad it’s extinct!”  Dude, prehistory was home to some fucking TERRIFYING creatures. For some reason, everything back then was enormous and scary. Extinction doesn’t always have to be a bad thing! And Poppy, what you saw was an arthropod known as Pterygotus (it was actually featured in Walking With Monsters). Not only was it as big (or maybe even bigger) than your average human, it had a stinger the size of a lightbulb. REALLY glad that bugger isn’t around anymore. Also, Megalodon deserves to be mention again, because just hearing its name makes me want to never be submerged in water ever again. GOD, I HATE THIS POST. HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW THAT SHIT ISN’T STILL AROUND? LURKING? EVOLVING? WE DON’T. WE DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT DOWN THERE. THE OCEAN IS A PRIMEVAL HELLSCAPE NIGHTMARE AND WE ALL JUST DIP OUR STUPID FRAGILE UNPROTECTED FETUS BODIES AROUND THE EDGES OF IT LIKE THAT’S NORMAL. FUCK THE OCEAN. this is so relevant to my interests  It wasn’t just the predators. North Carolina was once home to giant ground sloths… THAT IS A GODDAMNED LEAF-EATING SLOTH. We’ve got a skeleton of one of these fuckers at the museum downtown, and man, just being NEAR it is unsettling. DON’T FORGET PREHISTORIC WHALES, SOME OF THOSE FUCKERS WERE TERRIFYING AMBULOCETUS WAS AMPHIBIOUS AND PRETTY BADASS BASILOSAURUS WAS THIS GIANT REPTILIAN CETACEAN THAT PROBABLY SWAM LIKE A DUMB EEL BECAUSE OF ITS TINY FLUKES BUT THIS FUCKER WAS 60 FEET LONG AND AT THE TOP OF THE MARINE FOOD CHAIN AND THEN THERE’S MY FAVORITE, ZYGOPHYSETER, WHICH WAS THIS HUGE EARLY SPERM WHALE THAT ATE SHARKS AND OTHER WHALES IT WAS NOTHING BUT TEETH The reason why the animals in the prehistoric times were so big was because there was much more oxygen in the atmosphere if I recall correctly. Because there was so much oxygen and so few carbon gasses, life on earth was able to grow to terrifying lengths and heights, don’t forget how giant the bugs were. I have never seen so much prime nope in a single post *Goes on Tumblr at 5am to help me go back to sleep for a bit longer* *Never sleeps again* Dammit I was born to late for all the fun
Alive, Animals, and Bad: mithsonian smithchan.com/monsters nake
 CHANNELmanstersrake
 02012 SNUSI Networks LL.C. All rights reserved Smithson
legitimatelala:

lokiwtf:

gallizfrey:

anneriawings:

siphersaysstuff:

honey-andrevolution:

sashayed:

silvermoon424:

poppypicklesticks:

billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro:

cosmicallycosmopolitan:

billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro:

james-winston:

The Titanoboa, is a 48ft long snake dating from around 60-58million years ago. It had a rib cage 2ft wide, allowing it to eat whole crocodiles, and surrounding the ribcage were muscles so powerful that it could crush a rhino. Titanoboa was so big it couldn’t even spend long amounts of time on land, because the force of gravity acting on it would cause it to suffocate under its own weight.

I’m so glad they aren’t around

omg me too. I’m scared enough of 26 ft long anacondas. I’m so happy Megalodons, those giant sharks, aren’t alive either

Praise natural selection

I remember watching Walking with Beasts or something similar, or some British tv show about evolution
The subject was something like a 12 foot long water scorpion
I was so startled by its sudden appearance and narration that I yelped: “12 fucking feet?!?!  I’m fucking glad it’s extinct!” 

Dude, prehistory was home to some fucking TERRIFYING creatures. For some reason, everything back then was enormous and scary. Extinction doesn’t always have to be a bad thing!
And Poppy, what you saw was an arthropod known as Pterygotus (it was actually featured in Walking With Monsters). Not only was it as big (or maybe even bigger) than your average human, it had a stinger the size of a lightbulb. REALLY glad that bugger isn’t around anymore.

Also, Megalodon deserves to be mention again, because just hearing its name makes me want to never be submerged in water ever again.


GOD, I HATE THIS POST. HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW THAT SHIT ISN’T STILL AROUND? LURKING? EVOLVING? WE DON’T. WE DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT DOWN THERE. THE OCEAN IS A PRIMEVAL HELLSCAPE NIGHTMARE AND WE ALL JUST DIP OUR STUPID FRAGILE UNPROTECTED FETUS BODIES AROUND THE EDGES OF IT LIKE THAT’S NORMAL. FUCK THE OCEAN.

this is so relevant to my interests 

It wasn’t just the predators. North Carolina was once home to giant ground sloths…

THAT IS A GODDAMNED LEAF-EATING SLOTH.
We’ve got a skeleton of one of these fuckers at the museum downtown, and man, just being NEAR it is unsettling.


DON’T FORGET PREHISTORIC WHALES, SOME OF THOSE FUCKERS WERE TERRIFYING
AMBULOCETUS WAS AMPHIBIOUS AND PRETTY BADASS

BASILOSAURUS WAS THIS GIANT REPTILIAN CETACEAN THAT PROBABLY SWAM LIKE A DUMB EEL BECAUSE OF ITS TINY FLUKES BUT THIS FUCKER WAS 60 FEET LONG AND AT THE TOP OF THE MARINE FOOD CHAIN
AND THEN THERE’S MY FAVORITE, ZYGOPHYSETER, WHICH WAS THIS HUGE EARLY SPERM WHALE THAT ATE SHARKS AND OTHER WHALES
IT WAS NOTHING BUT TEETH



The reason why the animals in the prehistoric times were so big was because there was much more oxygen in the atmosphere if I recall correctly. Because there was so much oxygen and so few carbon gasses, life on earth was able to grow to terrifying lengths and heights, don’t forget how giant the bugs were.


I have never seen so much prime nope in a single post


*Goes on Tumblr at 5am to help me go back to sleep for a bit longer*
*Never sleeps again*


Dammit I was born to late for all the fun

legitimatelala: lokiwtf: gallizfrey: anneriawings: siphersaysstuff: honey-andrevolution: sashayed: silvermoon424: poppypicklesticks:...

Af, America, and Apparently: Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men are as objectified as women on TV actor has joined the debate genders are judged equally on looks about objectification in TVand L4 shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us.
Af, America, and Apparently: Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men
 are as objectified as women on TV
 actor has joined the debate
 genders are judged equally on looks
 about objectification in TVand
 L4
shipperwolf1:
brunhiddensmusings:

fierceawakening:

guyveranimefan87:

eric-coldfire:

eldritchgentleman:

cruxofargon:

the-critical-feminist:

cishetwhiteoppressor:

Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit.
Source

My god I love her.

I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT.
When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. 
Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”.
The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. 
Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist.

You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. 

Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex.

If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here.
Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he?
Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”. 
Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular.
As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!”
It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better.
According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables. 
Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%…
… But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time.
I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then…
There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration…
And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia
Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder…
So… Thanks Hollywood?


I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this.

dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting

real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent 
guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us.

shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-femin...

Doctor, Drinking, and Google: Sprint LTE 8:17 PM * 31%(10 Home (3) Active now This might seem Hey totally random but I'm curious. What do you know about Pure Therapeutic Ketones and ketosis? Hey! I am diabetic. Ketones is byproduct of your body burning through fat. Once the fat is gone it starts burning your protein. Which is what your muscles and organs are made of. People who do the keto diet have to replace what is lost by the diet. That's why it's so fatty and protein based. People who are on it for too long can have kidney, liver heart, lung, and muscle damage Ketosis is what a lot of diabetic die from I don't diet. I portion control and eat healthy. Carbs are necessary for proper bodily functions. As a nurse you should know that. Sprint LTE 9:02 PM * 25% @ } Home (3) Active now Hey girl, you seem to be really knowledgeable about this which is really awesome! Let me connect you with my friend Christen. She's a nurse and she has been drinking ketones for a really long time! She would totally be able to answer any questions you have. Are you open to that? Do you know what diabetic ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from ketones. I was in the icu and almost died from it. My body was shutting down and if my friend wouldn't have brought me to the Er I would have gone into cardiac arrest and died at home with no help. I'm not the person to sell that stuff to. I can pull up numerous articles that actually have real statistics and medical proof backing up what this fad diet does to the human body. Liver failure, kidney failure, blindness, amputations of extremities, heart failure, neuropathy, and much much more. No one wants people researching this information Sprint LTE 9:02 PM * 25% KHome (3) ctive Do you know what diabetic ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from ketones. I was in the icu and almost died from it. My body was shutting down and if my friend wouldn't have brought me to the Er I would have gone into cardiac arrest and died at home with no help. I'm not the person to sell that stuff to. I can pull up numerous articles that actually have real statistics and medical proof backing up what this fad diet does to the human body. Liver failure, kidney failure, blindness, amputations of extremities, heart failure, neuropathy, and much much more. No one wants people researching this information because they are capitalizing on permanent damage and death for their own financial gain. People blindly start these diets without researching them. It will take years off of the lives of a lot of people and that means less time with the ones they love. I do not advocate the diet. But thank you for trying. I Sprint LTE ※ 9:12 PM ア* 23% a KHome (2) C0 Active now researching them. It will take years off of the lives of a lot of people and that means less time with the ones they love. I do not advocate the diet. But thank you for trying. Ketosis and ketoacidosis are two totally different things. We are actually born in ketosis and stay that way until we are introduced to a traditional American diet. I totally respect your opinion though They are not. Ask a doctor like I did. Google it actually. Ketones put your body into a state of ketoacidosis Which is exactly what causes all of that. Americans need to stop eating processed foods and eating healthy. Plus getting up and being active is important to a balanced and healthy lifestyle. Americans are fooled by what's advertised and what's easy. As a consumer, it is our responsibility to be educated. Sprint LTE 9:21 PM Home (2) Active now Americans are fooled by what's advertised and what's easy. As a consumer, it is our responsibility to be educated https:/thcliphd.com/video clip-516648776d4f4243676f464 5 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis Clip Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video clip Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 720 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 1080, Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis thcliphd.com I don't care. Shut up and go the fuck away. I thought you'd get that shit with the first response. Go away. Far away. 00四0 Aa Gotta love MLM's
Doctor, Drinking, and Google: Sprint LTE
 8:17 PM
 * 31%(10
 Home (3)
 Active now
 This might seem
 Hey
 totally random but I'm curious.
 What do you know about Pure
 Therapeutic Ketones and ketosis?
 Hey! I am diabetic. Ketones is
 byproduct of your body burning
 through fat. Once the fat is gone it
 starts burning your protein. Which is
 what your muscles and organs are
 made of. People who do the keto diet
 have to replace what is lost by the
 diet. That's why it's so fatty and
 protein based. People who are on it
 for too long can have kidney, liver
 heart, lung, and muscle damage
 Ketosis is what a lot of diabetic die
 from
 I don't diet. I portion control and eat
 healthy.
 Carbs are necessary for proper
 bodily functions.
 As a nurse you should know that.

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25% @ }
 Home (3)
 Active now
 Hey girl, you seem to be really
 knowledgeable about this which is
 really awesome! Let me connect
 you with my friend Christen. She's
 a nurse and she has been drinking
 ketones for a really long time! She
 would totally be able to answer
 any questions you have. Are you
 open to that?
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25%
 KHome (3) ctive
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information
 because they are capitalizing on
 permanent damage and death for
 their own financial gain. People
 blindly start these diets without
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.

 I Sprint LTE ※
 9:12 PM
 ア* 23%
 a
 KHome (2)
 C0
 Active now
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.
 Ketosis and ketoacidosis are two
 totally different things. We are
 actually born in ketosis and stay
 that way until we are introduced to
 a traditional American diet. I totally
 respect your opinion though
 They are not. Ask a doctor like I did.
 Google it actually. Ketones put your
 body into a state of ketoacidosis
 Which is exactly what causes all of
 that. Americans need to stop eating
 processed foods and eating healthy.
 Plus getting up and being active is
 important to a
 balanced and healthy lifestyle.
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated.

 Sprint LTE
 9:21 PM
 Home (2)
 Active now
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated
 https:/thcliphd.com/video
 clip-516648776d4f4243676f464
 5
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 Clip Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video clip
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 720
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 1080,
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 thcliphd.com
 I don't care. Shut up and go the fuck
 away. I thought you'd get that shit
 with the first response. Go away. Far
 away.
 00四0 Aa
Gotta love MLM's

Gotta love MLM's

Advice, Confused, and Disappointed: alexaloraetheris: Reasons I believe my friend is secretly some kind of deity 1) First time we spoke was a week after the beggining of freshman year she summed up my entire character and most of the events of my life Sherlock style. I asked her how the hell she knew all that. She just shrugged and said she figured out our entire class already 1 2) The one time we had religion class instead of ethics she listened to the teacher for a few minutes, laughed and told me "Humans have wished to be gods so much they've forgotten they have to ability to create them. Imagination has truly suffered from this monotheism stuff." I was confused and asked her if she was an atheist. She rolled her eyes and said Oh I believe in god alright. I just don't think the bastard deserves to be worshipped." 3) Out of nowhere she gave me this advice The only truth a liar ever told was that lies weren't going to save you. Don't become the liar who has to pass that wisdom on, because they speak from experience 4) To this day, she has one of those old-timey phones with buttons she only uses to ocassionally call someone. When I asked her why she never got a smartphone she got pouty: "I hate social media. On Facebook they talk a lot but never say anything. If I wanted to listen to people moan about their problems and ask for help they don't expect l'd listen to their prayers." (Notice the choice of words) 5) I noticed she was stiff and I offered her a massage since I'm really good at it but when i started kneading her back I swear to this day those were not muscles I felt. I asked her what she did to turn her muscles into rocks covered with a thin layer of skin and she kinda froze then shrugged and said she was just really, really stiff. My hands hurt after ten minutes when I can usually go for an hour. Next time I offered she seemed surprised and laughed. She still has rocks for muscles 6) We were having a debate over the way neural pathways are formed (I study biology and she forensics) and I jokingly asked if I could have her brain for study when she dies. She laughed Sure, if you find a way to kill me you can have it. I'm actually curious what you're gonna find." 7) One time she was tired and miserable and I tried to comfort her. We both have really dark sense of humor so I told her she could scare the dead out of their graves with that glare. She told me the dead can't come back and I rolled my eyes and said 'obviously' but she continued When you die you descend to the underworld with nothing to lose. To keep you, they give you something to lose. When you want to return, they will demand it back. That's why nobody ever leaves. The only way out is to never enter." 8) One day she just came up to me with a disappointed look on her face When I asked her what was wrong she was quiet for a few seconds and then just told me "Betrayals committed in good intentions are still damning. Just... keep that in mind." Then she left and didn't speak to me for three days. I still don't know what she meant but even three years later I haven't forgotten it. 9) We were casually sitting on a bench when, out of nowhere, she asked me Is it just me or have humans gotten dumber? Or have they always been this stupid and I just haven't been paying attention?" 10) She asked me if I ever wondered what it was like to die. I said no but told her I would tell her when I found out. I meant it as a ghost joke but she smiled at me and said Great. I'll wait for you to come back. Maybe you'll even remember me In conclusion, she is some kind of low-key god and she lost her faith in humanity even before we lost our faith in her but she's stuck with us because immortality is a bitclh P.S. I just remembered her name is a variation on 'Eve'. Maybe l should reconsider my atheist status?! What if God was one of us?
Advice, Confused, and Disappointed: alexaloraetheris:
 Reasons I believe my friend is secretly some kind of deity
 1) First time we spoke was a week after the beggining of freshman year she
 summed up my entire character and most of the events of my life Sherlock
 style. I asked her how the hell she knew all that. She just shrugged and said
 she figured out our entire class already
 1
 2) The one time we had religion class instead of ethics she listened to the
 teacher for a few minutes, laughed and told me
 "Humans have wished to be gods so much they've forgotten they have to
 ability to create them. Imagination has truly suffered from this monotheism
 stuff."
 I was confused and asked her if she was an atheist. She rolled her eyes and
 said
 Oh I believe in god alright. I just don't think the bastard deserves to be
 worshipped."
 3) Out of nowhere she gave me this advice
 The only truth a liar ever told was that lies weren't going to save you. Don't
 become the liar who has to pass that wisdom on, because they speak from
 experience
 4) To this day, she has one of those old-timey phones with buttons she only
 uses to ocassionally call someone. When I asked her why she never got a
 smartphone she got pouty:
 "I hate social media. On Facebook they talk a lot but never say anything. If I
 wanted to listen to people moan about their problems and ask for help they
 don't expect l'd listen to their prayers." (Notice the choice of words)
 5) I noticed she was stiff and I offered her a massage since I'm really good at
 it but when i started kneading her back I swear to this day those were not
 muscles I felt. I asked her what she did to turn her muscles into rocks
 covered with a thin layer of skin and she kinda froze then shrugged and said
 she was just really, really stiff. My hands hurt after ten minutes when I can
 usually go for an hour. Next time I offered she seemed surprised and
 laughed. She still has rocks for muscles
 6) We were having a debate over the way neural pathways are formed (I
 study biology and she forensics) and I jokingly asked if I could have her brain
 for study when she dies. She laughed
 Sure, if you find a way to kill me you can have it. I'm actually curious what
 you're gonna find."
 7) One time she was tired and miserable and I tried to comfort her. We both
 have really dark sense of humor so I told her she could scare the dead out of
 their graves with that glare. She told me the dead can't come back and I
 rolled my eyes and said 'obviously' but she continued
 When you die you descend to the underworld with nothing to lose. To keep
 you, they give you something to lose. When you want to return, they will
 demand it back. That's why nobody ever leaves. The only way out is to never
 enter."
 8) One day she just came up to me with a disappointed look on her face
 When I asked her what was wrong she was quiet for a few seconds and then
 just told me
 "Betrayals committed in good intentions are still damning. Just... keep that in
 mind." Then she left and didn't speak to me for three days. I still don't know
 what she meant but even three years later I haven't forgotten it.
 9) We were casually sitting on a bench when, out of nowhere, she asked me
 Is it just me or have humans gotten dumber? Or have they always been this
 stupid and I just haven't been paying attention?"
 10) She asked me if I ever wondered what it was like to die. I said no but told
 her I would tell her when I found out. I meant it as a ghost joke but she smiled
 at me and said
 Great. I'll wait for you to come back. Maybe you'll even remember me
 In conclusion, she is some kind of low-key god and she lost her faith in
 humanity even before we lost our faith in her but she's stuck with us because
 immortality is a bitclh
 P.S. I just remembered her name is a variation on 'Eve'. Maybe l should
 reconsider my atheist status?!
What if God was one of us?

What if God was one of us?