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Advice, Ass, and Clothes: The Wall Street Journal WSJ Friday at 10:01 AM Most millennials don't even know what fabric softener is used for, and that worries Procter & Gamble 60 Dou ULTRA Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener; P&G Looks to Fix That wsj.com organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: ghostoftwentysomethingspresent: madsciences: awfullydull: markrial: tramampoline: slow-riot: Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe 1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.) 1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.) ½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load. ^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give! Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply. Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco. Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray. Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda) Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make. I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets. I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one PSA don’t ask the employee to make it into a tight ball - it’ll be really stressful for them because they don’t really have the time. Instead find a tutorial on youtube and do it at home.Remember we’re sticking it to the man, not minimim wage employees!
Advice, Ass, and Clothes: The Wall Street Journal
 WSJ
 Friday at 10:01 AM
 Most millennials don't even know what fabric
 softener is used for, and that worries Procter &
 Gamble
 60
 Dou
 ULTRA
 Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener;
 P&G Looks to Fix That
 wsj.com
organized-studies:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:


ghostoftwentysomethingspresent:

madsciences:

awfullydull:

markrial:

tramampoline:

slow-riot:
Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil
its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS
AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT
DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER
FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe
1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)
1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)
½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!


Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.
Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.
Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.
Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)
Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.


I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.


I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one


PSA don’t ask the employee to make it into a tight ball - it’ll be really stressful for them because they don’t really have the time. Instead find a tutorial on youtube and do it at home.Remember we’re sticking it to the man, not minimim wage employees!

organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: ghostoftwentysomethingspresent: madsciences: awfullydull: ma...

Advice, Ass, and Beautiful: The Wall Street Journal WSJ Friday at 10:01 AM Most millennials don't even know what fabric softener is used for, and that worries Procter & Gamble 60 Dou ULTRA Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener; P&G Looks to Fix That wsj.com weareallstilllearningright: bi-fem-plantnerd: sagelynaive: organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: ghostoftwentysomethingspresent: madsciences: awfullydull: markrial: tramampoline: slow-riot: Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe 1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.) 1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.) ½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load. ^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give! Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply. Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco. Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray. Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda) Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make. I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets. I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one Kudos to all of this, but don’t ask a craft store employee at a chain craft store to make your wool yarn into a tight ball for you. I worked at JoAnn Fabrics for a year and a half. We literally have no resources or ability to do something like that. You could do a better job yourself at home. The chain craft store employee can’t look up a youtube tutorial for making yarn laundry balls on the clock, you can. If someone had walked up to me while I was working at JoAnn and asked me to take a half hour or more out of my shift to try and fail in making some kind of tight yarn laundry contraption I probably would have burst into tears. And if my manager had come out and found me trying and failing to wind yarn when I was supposed to be running go backs I would have gotten a talking to. Craft store employees aren’t allowed, able, or willing to do your crafts for you. That’s why it’s a craft store. Don’t hurt retail workers in your quest for overriding the capitalist system. For the love of everything beautiful please just look it up. These are all great ways to reduce waste we produce from constantly buying detergent, softener, and dryer sheets. Is there like a reason not to buy detergent? Cause uh this sounds a million times more complicated and definitely more expensive.Most washing pods are £5 for a pack of about 30, I’m already counting more than that for those ingredients. Also who the hell just knows where to get Borax or Boric acid? Guessing you’d have to get it online so you’re probably racking up a bigger CO2 footprint with your “DIY fuck the system” bullshit than you would if you like just bought some normal soap. Also idk what magic you think needs to happen to clothes but if you don’t like laundry soap yk you could just throw other soap in there it’s the machine doing most of the washing.Better yet, if you have all this spear time and energy for laundry just get a bar of soap and a rack and scrub the clothes by hand. Do you have literally no concept of cost as it relates to quantity? The ingredients may be initially slightly more but you’ll get a lot more than 30 loads out of them. Also “all those ingredients“? It’s like three my dude. And borax is not hard to purchase? And if you don’t know where to buy it Google exists?Like maybe in your view there is zero reason to make your own detergent but there’s also zero reason to act like some helpful cost-effective tips are the worst thing you’ve ever seen 🙄
Advice, Ass, and Beautiful: The Wall Street Journal
 WSJ
 Friday at 10:01 AM
 Most millennials don't even know what fabric
 softener is used for, and that worries Procter &
 Gamble
 60
 Dou
 ULTRA
 Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener;
 P&G Looks to Fix That
 wsj.com
weareallstilllearningright:

bi-fem-plantnerd:

sagelynaive:
organized-studies:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:


ghostoftwentysomethingspresent:

madsciences:

awfullydull:

markrial:

tramampoline:

slow-riot:
Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil
its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS
AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT
DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER
FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe
1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)
1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)
½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!


Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.
Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.
Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.
Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)
Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.


I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.


I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one


Kudos to all of this, but don’t ask a craft store employee at a chain craft store to make your wool yarn into a tight ball for you. I worked at JoAnn Fabrics for a year and a half. We literally have no resources or ability to do something like that. You could do a better job yourself at home. The chain craft store employee can’t look up a youtube tutorial for making yarn laundry balls on the clock, you can. 
If someone had walked up to me while I was working at JoAnn and asked me to take a half hour or more out of my shift to try and fail in making some kind of tight yarn laundry contraption I probably would have burst into tears. And if my manager had come out and found me trying and failing to wind yarn when I was supposed to be running go backs I would have gotten a talking to. Craft store employees aren’t allowed, able, or willing to do your crafts for you. That’s why it’s a craft store. 
Don’t hurt retail workers in your quest for overriding the capitalist system. For the love of everything beautiful please just look it up. 

These are all great ways to reduce waste we produce from constantly buying detergent, softener, and dryer sheets.

Is there like a reason not to buy detergent? Cause uh this sounds a million times more complicated and definitely more expensive.Most washing pods are £5 for a pack of about 30, I’m already counting more than that for those ingredients. Also who the hell just knows where to get Borax or Boric acid? Guessing you’d have to get it online so you’re probably racking up a bigger CO2 footprint with your “DIY fuck the system” bullshit than you would if you like just bought some normal soap. Also idk what magic you think needs to happen to clothes but if you don’t like laundry soap yk you could just throw other soap in there it’s the machine doing most of the washing.Better yet, if you have all this spear time and energy for laundry just get a bar of soap and a rack and scrub the clothes by hand. 

Do you have literally no concept of cost as it relates to quantity? The ingredients may be initially slightly more but you’ll get a lot more than 30 loads out of them. Also “all those ingredients“? It’s like three my dude. And borax is not hard to purchase? And if you don’t know where to buy it Google exists?Like maybe in your view there is zero reason to make your own detergent but there’s also zero reason to act like some helpful cost-effective tips are the worst thing you’ve ever seen 🙄

weareallstilllearningright: bi-fem-plantnerd: sagelynaive: organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: gh...

Advice, Ass, and Clothes: The Wall Street Journal WSJ Friday at 10:01 AM Most millennials don't even know what fabric softener is used for, and that worries Procter & Gamble 60 Dou ULTRA Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener; P&G Looks to Fix That wsj.com organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: ghostoftwentysomethingspresent: madsciences: awfullydull: markrial: tramampoline: slow-riot: Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe 1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.) 1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.) ½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load. ^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give! Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply. Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco. Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray. Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda) Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make. I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets. I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one
Advice, Ass, and Clothes: The Wall Street Journal
 WSJ
 Friday at 10:01 AM
 Most millennials don't even know what fabric
 softener is used for, and that worries Procter &
 Gamble
 60
 Dou
 ULTRA
 Millennials Are Fine Without Fabric Softener;
 P&G Looks to Fix That
 wsj.com
organized-studies:
kindnessandgoodvibrations:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:


ghostoftwentysomethingspresent:

madsciences:

awfullydull:

markrial:

tramampoline:

slow-riot:
Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil
its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS
AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT
DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER
FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe
1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)
1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)
½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

WHATThank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!


Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.
Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.
Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.
Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)
Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.


I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.


I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one

organized-studies: kindnessandgoodvibrations: kindnessandgoodvibrations: ghostoftwentysomethingspresent: madsciences: awfullydull: mar...

80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH) DO ANY OF THESE EXIST? NO INDEPENDENT CANADA US TERRITORY OF ALASKA TOKYO ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE? START DOES THE SOVET UNION EXIST? CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE? 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA A GIANT FRENCH BLOB? SAUDI YES 1805 OR EARUER (BEFORE THIS POINT THE MODERN IDEAOF ACOMPLETE POLITICAL MAP OF THEWORLD GETS HARD TOAPPLY ARABIA? THE SOVIET UNION? NO ZAIRE? OR HONG KONG (UK DOES THE OTTOMAN 1922-1932 YES EPIRE EXIST? SOUTH AFRICA? NO YES HOW MANY VIETNAMS ARE THERE? 992-96 AUSTRIA HUNGARY? NORTH KOREA? SAINT TRIMBLES ISLAND SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE.. ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY? THE UNITED STATES? NO YES HOU SURE ARE YOU THAT THIS MAP IS IN ENGLISH? WHAT? PAKISTAN? BANGLADESH? YES NOIMADE THAT ONE UP LENINGRAD? NOYES 1919-23 1124-29 HOU MANY SUDANS ARE THERE? RHODESIA? EAST TIMOR? NO YES 972-75 ALBANIA? CAN YOU SEE THE FAMIUAR CONTINENTS? NO YES 1910-12 1915-18 1997-2001 2002-06 TEXAS IS.. PARTOF MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US DENT 834-45 2007- HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE? TUO CAMBODIA? PARTOF THIS SOUNDS LIKE A PHYSICAL MAP OR SATELLITE PHOTO "COLORADO OR "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID? DANGER YES ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE 1941-45 IS CRIMEA DISPUTED? ISNORUAY PART OF SUEDEN? YES 18%-1905 1906-09 h-9h6l YES, THATS IT ERITREA IS PARTOF.. EHОРА 1952-53 FLORIDA IS PARTOF.. COLORADO 204-2 PERSIA OR IRAN? 2012-13 RIVERS SIRION OR ANDUIN? ITALY SPAIN THE US RAN PERSIA DOES THE UARNING MENTION THE SPIDERS? IS LAKE CHAD MISSING? 1935-40 1930-34 IS BOLIVIA LANDLOCKED? JIMMY CARTER IS. BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE GANT SUMING RPESIT APRIL 20 1979 VENEZUELA ANDOR ECUADOR? NO YES 1818-29 1830-33 THE UNITED ARAB REPUBLIC? NO 1954-57 1958-60 PARAGUAY? CANADA IS.. MISSING FINE A PIECE 1948 YES 1806-10 18-17 2023 ORLATER 2022 CAIR PARAVEL? 1884-95 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY? ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT 1980 IS THE ARAL SEA MISSING? 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA. TANGANYIKA 1961-64 MOSSFLOUER? MORDOR? BUDA AND PEST OR BUDAPEST? 1981 1976-79 DOES RUSSIA BORDER THE SEA OF JAPAN? TANZANIA BRITISH 1965-71 960 1970s-90s 20O0st REDUALL WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA? KOLONIA BUDA AND BUDAPEST PEST PAUKIR 1873-83 1858-67 IS THE WORLD ON THE BACK OF A TURTUE? NO DISCWORLD THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS.. HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES 1868-72 NOMENOR? YES NO LATE SECOND AGE BELERIAND? REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO? THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS. WEIRD FIRST EARLY AGE SECOND AGE NORMAL 854-56 1948-49 1950-52 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO 1982-84 846-53 ARE YOU SURE THIS IS A MAP? CALORMEN? 1985-88 THE FOREST EASTOF THE MISTY MOUNTAINS IS.. IS IT TRYING HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH? THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA 1830s-80s (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS) FOUR 1989-EARLY 1990 TO BITE YOU? ? INDIANA UNAT PRAIRIES? GREENJOODI MRKJOOD THE GREAT EARLY THIRD AGE THE UOOD OF GREENLEAVES THREE MID-1990 BEFORE 1830 LATE THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE LATE1990-199 DID YOU MAKE IT YOURSELF? WEIRD RECURSIVE HEAVEN? 15 THERE A BIG LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA? (CREATED BY MISTAKE) I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF GHANA? (CREATED ON PURPOSE) NO 1920s-505 LOTTA 1SLANDS? IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO? I5 IT LARGER THAN A BREADBOX? YES TUBA STAPLER THE SAME BERUNA FORDBRIDGE HISSES AND RUNS AWAY CAT SCREECHES AND FLAPS ARDUND THE ROOn BREAKING THINGE5 YES ONE OF THE THE RANDOM LAST LATER BOOKS BATE NO YES ABOUT ITS VERY NICE. THANK YOU RELION PRINCE UEHE CASPIAN WARDROBE DALIN TREACER YES SEAGULL BREADBOX 1860s-1900s 1960s-70s 1910s land-of-maps: this helps a lot
80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP
 (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH)
 DO ANY OF THESE EXIST?
 NO INDEPENDENT CANADA
 US TERRITORY OF ALASKA
 TOKYO
 ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE?
 START
 DOES THE SOVET
 UNION EXIST?
 CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL
 THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE?
 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA
 A GIANT FRENCH BLOB?
 SAUDI
 YES
 1805 OR EARUER
 (BEFORE THIS POINT
 THE MODERN IDEAOF
 ACOMPLETE POLITICAL
 MAP OF THEWORLD
 GETS HARD TOAPPLY
 ARABIA?
 THE
 SOVIET
 UNION? NO
 ZAIRE?
 OR HONG KONG (UK
 DOES THE OTTOMAN
 1922-1932
 YES
 EPIRE EXIST?
 SOUTH AFRICA?
 NO
 YES
 HOW MANY VIETNAMS
 ARE THERE?
 992-96
 AUSTRIA
 HUNGARY?
 NORTH KOREA?
 SAINT
 TRIMBLES
 ISLAND
 SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE..
 ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES
 NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF
 THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY?
 THE UNITED
 STATES?
 NO YES
 HOU SURE ARE
 YOU THAT THIS MAP
 IS IN ENGLISH?
 WHAT?
 PAKISTAN?
 BANGLADESH?
 YES
 NOIMADE
 THAT ONE UP
 LENINGRAD?
 NOYES
 1919-23 1124-29
 HOU MANY SUDANS
 ARE THERE?
 RHODESIA?
 EAST TIMOR?
 NO
 YES
 972-75
 ALBANIA?
 CAN YOU SEE
 THE FAMIUAR
 CONTINENTS?
 NO YES
 1910-12 1915-18
 1997-2001 2002-06
 TEXAS IS..
 PARTOF
 MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US
 DENT
 834-45
 2007-
 HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE?
 TUO
 CAMBODIA?
 PARTOF
 THIS SOUNDS LIKE
 A PHYSICAL MAP OR
 SATELLITE PHOTO
 "COLORADO OR
 "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE
 EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID?
 DANGER
 YES
 ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE
 1941-45
 IS CRIMEA
 DISPUTED?
 ISNORUAY
 PART OF SUEDEN?
 YES
 18%-1905 1906-09
 h-9h6l
 YES, THATS IT
 ERITREA IS PARTOF..
 EHОРА
 1952-53
 FLORIDA IS PARTOF..
 COLORADO
 204-2
 PERSIA OR IRAN?
 2012-13
 RIVERS SIRION
 OR ANDUIN?
 ITALY
 SPAIN
 THE US
 RAN
 PERSIA
 DOES THE UARNING
 MENTION THE SPIDERS?
 IS LAKE
 CHAD MISSING?
 1935-40
 1930-34
 IS BOLIVIA
 LANDLOCKED?
 JIMMY CARTER IS.
 BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE
 GANT SUMING RPESIT
 APRIL 20 1979
 VENEZUELA
 ANDOR
 ECUADOR?
 NO YES
 1818-29 1830-33
 THE UNITED
 ARAB REPUBLIC?
 NO
 1954-57 1958-60
 PARAGUAY?
 CANADA IS..
 MISSING FINE
 A PIECE
 1948
 YES
 1806-10 18-17
 2023 ORLATER
 2022
 CAIR PARAVEL?
 1884-95
 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY?
 ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT
 1980
 IS THE ARAL
 SEA MISSING?
 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA.
 TANGANYIKA
 1961-64
 MOSSFLOUER?
 MORDOR?
 BUDA AND PEST
 OR BUDAPEST?
 1981
 1976-79
 DOES RUSSIA BORDER
 THE SEA OF JAPAN?
 TANZANIA
 BRITISH
 1965-71
 960
 1970s-90s 20O0st
 REDUALL
 WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA?
 KOLONIA
 BUDA AND BUDAPEST
 PEST
 PAUKIR
 1873-83
 1858-67
 IS THE WORLD ON THE
 BACK OF A TURTUE?
 NO
 DISCWORLD
 THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN
 ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS..
 HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES
 1868-72
 NOMENOR?
 YES NO
 LATE
 SECOND AGE
 BELERIAND?
 REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER
 VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO?
 THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS.
 WEIRD
 FIRST EARLY
 AGE SECOND AGE
 NORMAL
 854-56
 1948-49
 1950-52
 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO
 1982-84
 846-53
 ARE YOU SURE
 THIS IS A MAP?
 CALORMEN?
 1985-88
 THE FOREST EASTOF THE
 MISTY MOUNTAINS IS..
 IS IT TRYING
 HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH?
 THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA
 1830s-80s
 (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS)
 FOUR
 1989-EARLY 1990
 TO BITE YOU?
 ?
 INDIANA
 UNAT PRAIRIES?
 GREENJOODI MRKJOOD
 THE GREAT
 EARLY
 THIRD AGE
 THE UOOD OF
 GREENLEAVES
 THREE
 MID-1990
 BEFORE
 1830
 LATE
 THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE
 LATE1990-199
 DID YOU MAKE
 IT YOURSELF?
 WEIRD
 RECURSIVE
 HEAVEN?
 15 THERE A BIG
 LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF
 SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA?
 (CREATED BY MISTAKE)
 I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN
 THE MIDDLE OF GHANA?
 (CREATED ON PURPOSE)
 NO
 1920s-505
 LOTTA
 1SLANDS?
 IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO?
 I5 IT LARGER
 THAN A BREADBOX?
 YES
 TUBA STAPLER THE SAME
 BERUNA
 FORDBRIDGE
 HISSES AND
 RUNS AWAY
 CAT
 SCREECHES AND FLAPS
 ARDUND THE ROOn
 BREAKING THINGE5
 YES
 ONE OF THE THE
 RANDOM LAST
 LATER BOOKS BATE
 NO YES
 ABOUT
 ITS VERY NICE.
 THANK YOU
 RELION PRINCE
 UEHE CASPIAN
 WARDROBE
 DALIN
 TREACER
 YES
 SEAGULL
 BREADBOX
 1860s-1900s
 1960s-70s
 1910s
land-of-maps:

this helps a lot

land-of-maps: this helps a lot

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Advice, Charmander, and God: Tweet t Roger DiLuigi III retweeted Wallid Kanaan 00 @Balrog TheMaster Twitch Plays XY was able to successfully Wonder Trade and got an Omanyte called Lady Helix. HOW Misickf71 20,131 Twitch Plays Pokemon 2014-07-27 07:03:23 UTC Stream delay:30s Haloelite2 Thundernind5700 Broadswordnast ar Hquaticsmore5 Dragoonxd aichu Jirachinoe LADY HELIX Lv.1 R240,140 80,150 A 300,234 ??? Omanyte 12/12 DEX NO. НР ATTACK 6 Nanashi yanabiko Me10atta Czarwona.latarni a BX BХ DEFENSE 6 AOEK WATER 293, 124 SP. ATK 7 Rkjhouopc 123 A SP. DEF 6 MOVES LEARNED SPEED 6 Constrict NATURE Mild Withdraw ABILITY Shell Armor None ITEM Od3h03n23s Badges: 0 Last save: 4n ago Last party display update: 42s ago NO W OMRSQ LADY HELD Continue operations? AWA Report Problem atma-starfish: commandtower-solring-go: dpdchxkenpachi: commandtower-solring-go: dpdchxkenpachi: swan2swan: skeletim: precumming: Wtf… holy SHIT Do not doubt a god. I don’t get it The original Twitch plays pokemon was a Twitch based event from a few years back where users of the Twitch Chat could submit button presses based on the layout of an old Game Boy to play Pokemon Red. Eventually they did manage to beat the game. But along the way it had sparked a huge following and somehow developed it’s own lore based on the pokemon caught and the names they were given. However, at Mount Moon, Twitch decided to take the Helix Fossil, an item that could be used to acquire an Omanyte later in the game.  Due to the nature of the system, a lot of the time the character just would walk around in circles for hours on end, and one thing that would happen constantly would be that they would open their item menu and try to ‘use’ the Helix Fossil. Since the item had no function, people adopted the idea that they were ‘consulting’ the Helix Fossil for advice, and that it was their lord and saviour. What makes this Lady Helix so incredible is that, there was an incredibly small chance that they would get to Wonder Trade. And knowing wonder trade, the pokemon you’ll get in return is impossible to predetermine. So for not only them to get an Omanyte, is amazing. But the fact that that Omanyte references explicitly the events of he previous TPP, is nuts  I knew that Twitch plays Pokémon was wild I had no idea that the lore ran this deep. Haha that’s amazing Oh it gets way better. Due to the random arse nicknames the pokemon got, they adopted monikers to go with it. I’ll run through a couple ABBBBBBBK( was the starter pokemon, Charmander and was nicknamed Abby. However was released. JLVWNNOOOO was the player’s Ratata, nicknamed Jay Leno. It was released with Abby, following due to loyalty aaabaaajss was the TPP Pidgeot, the strongest pkemon on the team, and was chosen by the Helix Fossile. It was nicknamed Bird Jesus.  Eevee the false prophet, sent by the Dome Fossil. Evolved into Flareon and was released AATTVVV was the team’s Venomoth, lovingly nicknamed the All Terrain Venomoth. One of the final party. AA-j was the team’s Zapdos, caught with a masterball and was dubbed Battery Jesus. however, he was a false prophet. Only a short time after it’s capture on the 11th day were a great deal of pokemon were released. It did, however, make it to the end of the game. AAAAAAAAAA or also known as The Fonz was also one of the last members in the party. A Nidoking that helped leave the team to victory. I only saw a little bit of the actual stream, but I followed the whole thing. it was amazing.  i want to point out that All Terrain Venomoth was horrendously underleveled and managed to take down one of Lance’s Dragonites
Advice, Charmander, and God: Tweet
 t Roger DiLuigi III retweeted
 Wallid Kanaan
 00
 @Balrog TheMaster
 Twitch Plays XY was able to
 successfully Wonder Trade and got an
 Omanyte called Lady Helix.
 HOW
 Misickf71
 20,131
 Twitch Plays Pokemon 2014-07-27 07:03:23 UTC
 Stream delay:30s
 Haloelite2
 Thundernind5700
 Broadswordnast ar
 Hquaticsmore5
 Dragoonxd
 aichu
 Jirachinoe
 LADY HELIX
 Lv.1
 R240,140
 80,150
 A
 300,234
 ??? Omanyte
 12/12
 DEX NO.
 НР
 ATTACK
 6
 Nanashi yanabiko
 Me10atta
 Czarwona.latarni a
 BX
 BХ
 DEFENSE
 6
 AOEK WATER
 293, 124
 SP. ATK
 7
 Rkjhouopc 123
 A
 SP. DEF
 6
 MOVES LEARNED
 SPEED
 6
 Constrict
 NATURE
 Mild
 Withdraw
 ABILITY
 Shell Armor
 None
 ITEM
 Od3h03n23s
 Badges: 0
 Last save: 4n ago
 Last party display update: 42s ago
 NO
 W OMRSQ
 LADY HELD
 Continue operations?
 AWA
 Report Problem
atma-starfish:

commandtower-solring-go:

dpdchxkenpachi:

commandtower-solring-go:


dpdchxkenpachi:

swan2swan:

skeletim:

precumming:

Wtf…

holy SHIT

Do not doubt a god.


I don’t get it

The original Twitch plays pokemon was a Twitch based event from a few years back where users of the Twitch Chat could submit button presses based on the layout of an old Game Boy to play Pokemon Red.
Eventually they did manage to beat the game. But along the way it had sparked a huge following and somehow developed it’s own lore based on the pokemon caught and the names they were given. However, at Mount Moon, Twitch decided to take the Helix Fossil, an item that could be used to acquire an Omanyte later in the game. 
Due to the nature of the system, a lot of the time the character just would walk around in circles for hours on end, and one thing that would happen constantly would be that they would open their item menu and try to ‘use’ the Helix Fossil. Since the item had no function, people adopted the idea that they were ‘consulting’ the Helix Fossil for advice, and that it was their lord and saviour.
What makes this Lady Helix so incredible is that, there was an incredibly small chance that they would get to Wonder Trade. And knowing wonder trade, the pokemon you’ll get in return is impossible to predetermine. So for not only them to get an Omanyte, is amazing. But the fact that that Omanyte references explicitly the events of he previous TPP, is nuts 


I knew that Twitch plays Pokémon was wild I had no idea that the lore ran this deep. Haha that’s amazing

Oh it gets way better. Due to the random arse nicknames the pokemon got, they adopted monikers to go with it. I’ll run through a couple
ABBBBBBBK( was the starter pokemon, Charmander and was nicknamed Abby. However was released.
JLVWNNOOOO was the player’s Ratata, nicknamed Jay Leno. It was released with Abby, following due to loyalty
aaabaaajss was the TPP Pidgeot, the strongest pkemon on the team, and was chosen by the Helix Fossile. It was nicknamed Bird Jesus. 
Eevee the false prophet, sent by the Dome Fossil. Evolved into Flareon and was released
AATTVVV was the team’s Venomoth, lovingly nicknamed the All Terrain Venomoth. One of the final party.
AA-j was the team’s Zapdos, caught with a masterball and was dubbed Battery Jesus. however, he was a false prophet. Only a short time after it’s capture on the 11th day were a great deal of pokemon were released. It did, however, make it to the end of the game.
AAAAAAAAAA or also known as The Fonz was also one of the last members in the party. A Nidoking that helped leave the team to victory.
I only saw a little bit of the actual stream, but I followed the whole thing. it was amazing. 

i want to point out that All Terrain Venomoth was horrendously underleveled and managed to take down one of Lance’s Dragonites

atma-starfish: commandtower-solring-go: dpdchxkenpachi: commandtower-solring-go: dpdchxkenpachi: swan2swan: skeletim: precumming: W...

Future, Saw, and Work: AceLewis /my_first_calculator.py O Watch Fork Star 11 612 80 目Wiki a Insights Pull requests 2 Security <> Code Issues 25 Projects 0 my_first_calculator.py 0 releases 13 commits 1 branch 4 contributors Clone or download New pull request Branch: master Create new file Upload files Find file AceLewis Merge branch 'master' of https://github.com/Acelewis/my first calcula...... Latest commit a7aabea on May 16, 2016 .gitattributes Added .gitattributes & .gitignore files 4 years ago Added .gitattributes & .gitignore files .gitignore 4 years ago README.md Recommended from future import division 4 years ago generator.py 4 years ago fix num of ifs - my first calculator.py d 0/0 being my first_calculator_0 to 1000.rt dated the archived 0 t 4 y 20823 lines (20818 sloc) 753 KB 41 2050") prin 20802 You're using jump to definition to te code. Opt out E ver 20803 if numl and sign = '" and num2 == #my_first_calculator.py by AceLewis print("50*42 2100") 20804 TODO : Make it work for all floating point numbers too if numl 50 and sign and num2 43: 23 20805 print ("50 43 2150") 20806 if 3/2 1: #Because Python 2 does not know maths 4 20807 if numl 50 and sign and num2 == 44 . input raw_input # Python 2 compatibility print ("50 44 2200") 20808 20809 if numl 50 and sign and num2 45: print("50 45 2250") print('Welcome to this calculator!) 7 20819 print('It can add, subtract, multiply and divide whole numbers from 20811 if numl 50 and sign and num2 46: num1 int(input('Please choose your first number: ) print ("50 46 2300") 20812 sign input('What do you want to do? +, /, or ) 10 if numl 50 and sign and num2 20813 47: num2 int (input('Please choose your second number: )) print("50*47 2350") 11 20815 12 if numl 50 and sign *and num2 48: if numl = 0 and sign = ' + 'and num2 0: print ("50 48 13 2400") 20816 print("0+0 0" ) 14 if numl 50 and sign 20817 *and num2 49: if numl 0 and sign == ' + ' and num2 1: 15 20818 print("50*49= 2450") print ("0+1 = 1 " ) if numl 50 and sign and num2 50: 16 20819 if numl and sign == 17 + and num2 -= 2: 20828 print("50*50 2500") print ("0+2 2") 18 20821 20822 print("Thanks for using this calculator, goodbye :") if numl and sign == '+ " and num2 3: 19 print ("0+3= 3") 20 Was searching for calculator project in github. Saw this. It belongs to here.
Future, Saw, and Work: AceLewis /my_first_calculator.py
 O Watch
 Fork
 Star
 11
 612
 80
 目Wiki
 a Insights
 Pull requests 2
 Security
 <> Code
 Issues 25
 Projects 0
 my_first_calculator.py
 0 releases
 13 commits
 1 branch
 4 contributors
 Clone or download
 New pull request
 Branch: master
 Create new file
 Upload files
 Find file
 AceLewis Merge branch 'master' of https://github.com/Acelewis/my first calcula......
 Latest commit a7aabea on May 16, 2016
 .gitattributes
 Added .gitattributes & .gitignore files
 4 years ago
 Added .gitattributes & .gitignore files
 .gitignore
 4 years ago
 README.md
 Recommended from future import division
 4 years ago
 generator.py
 4 years ago
 fix num of ifs
 -
 my first calculator.py
 d 0/0 being
 my first_calculator_0 to 1000.rt
 dated the archived 0 t
 4 y
 20823 lines (20818 sloc)
 753 KB
 41 2050")
 prin
 20802
 You're using jump to definition to
 te code. Opt out E
 ver
 20803
 if numl
 and sign = '"
 and num2 ==
 #my_first_calculator.py by AceLewis
 print("50*42 2100")
 20804
 TODO : Make it work for all floating point numbers too
 if numl
 50 and sign
 and num2 43:
 23
 20805
 print ("50 43
 2150")
 20806
 if 3/2 1:
 #Because Python 2 does not know maths
 4
 20807
 if numl 50 and sign
 and num2 == 44 .
 input raw_input # Python 2 compatibility
 print ("50 44
 2200")
 20808
 20809
 if numl
 50 and sign
 and num2
 45:
 print("50 45 2250")
 print('Welcome to this calculator!)
 7
 20819
 print('It can add, subtract, multiply and divide whole numbers from
 20811
 if numl 50 and sign
 and num2
 46:
 num1 int(input('Please choose your first number: )
 print ("50 46
 2300")
 20812
 sign input('What do you want to do? +, /, or
 )
 10
 if numl
 50 and sign
 and num2
 20813
 47:
 num2 int (input('Please choose your second number: ))
 print("50*47 2350")
 11
 20815
 12
 if numl
 50 and sign
 *and num2 48:
 if numl = 0 and sign = ' + 'and num2 0:
 print ("50 48
 13
 2400")
 20816
 print("0+0 0" )
 14
 if numl 50 and sign
 20817
 *and num2
 49:
 if numl
 0 and sign == ' + ' and num2 1:
 15
 20818
 print("50*49= 2450")
 print ("0+1 = 1 " )
 if numl
 50 and sign
 and num2 50:
 16
 20819
 if numl
 and sign ==
 17
 +
 and num2 -= 2:
 20828
 print("50*50 2500")
 print ("0+2 2")
 18
 20821
 20822 print("Thanks for using this calculator, goodbye :")
 if numl
 and sign == '+ " and num2 3:
 19
 print ("0+3= 3")
 20
Was searching for calculator project in github. Saw this. It belongs to here.

Was searching for calculator project in github. Saw this. It belongs to here.

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
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Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Baked, Dad, and Fail: theguilteaparty So my mom told me a story... Growing up, my mom and her siblings would make banana bread every week. Literally every week since the first one of them learned how to make it, they started making banana bread- lo and behold though, they liked it with walnuts and they all knew their dad hated walnuts. So they made a special loaf of banana bread just for him every week, just for him to eat. Nobody else was allowed to eat it because that was his banana bread, baked especially for him. So anyways, they did this once a week from middle school up until every last one of them moved out of the house (and considering there was at least 10 years difference from the oldest to the youngest, this was quite some time). So that's like... 16 years of weekly banana bread. And he always finished it. He, without fail, ate the whole loaf of bread by himself. That's approximately 835 loaves of banana bread. Now Skip ahead a few years... and they're all visiting and baking banana bread and they start making a dad's bread and their mom comes in, "I don't think he can handle eating one more slice of banana bread!" "What are you talking about? He loves banana bread! He had it all the time!" This is when my grandma, their mom, broke the news that my grandfather loathed banana bread with every fiber of his being. He just adored that his kids loved him enough to make him a special loaf of banana bread every week (and he didn't have the heart to tell them that he couldn't stand banana bread) and he was incredibly, utterly upset that my grandma told the kids his big secret. My grandfather was a loving, patient, gentle man who absolutely hated banana bread but loved his kids so much more and I just wanted to share that with you guys. I think this story is just about the perfect example of the kind of person he was. Dad and the Banana Bread
Baked, Dad, and Fail: theguilteaparty
 So my mom told me a story...
 Growing up, my mom and her siblings would
 make banana bread every week.
 Literally every week since the first one of them
 learned how to make it, they started making
 banana bread- lo and behold though, they liked
 it with walnuts and they all knew their dad
 hated walnuts.
 So they made a special loaf of banana bread
 just for him every week, just for him to eat.
 Nobody else was allowed to eat it because that
 was his banana bread, baked especially for
 him.
 So anyways, they did this once a week from
 middle school up until every last one of them
 moved out of the house (and considering there
 was at least 10 years difference from the oldest
 to the youngest, this was quite some time). So
 that's like... 16 years of weekly banana bread.
 And he always finished it. He, without fail, ate
 the whole loaf of bread by himself.
 That's approximately 835 loaves of banana
 bread.
 Now
 Skip ahead a few years...
 and they're all visiting and baking banana bread
 and they start making a dad's bread and their
 mom comes in, "I don't think he can handle
 eating one more slice of banana bread!"
 "What are you talking about? He loves banana
 bread! He had it all the time!"
 This is when my grandma, their mom, broke the
 news that my grandfather loathed banana
 bread with every fiber of his being. He just
 adored that his kids loved him enough to make
 him a special loaf of banana bread every week
 (and he didn't have the heart to tell them that
 he couldn't stand banana bread) and he was
 incredibly, utterly upset that my grandma told
 the kids his big secret.
 My grandfather was a loving, patient, gentle
 man who absolutely hated banana bread but
 loved his kids so much more and I just wanted
 to share that with you guys. I think this story is
 just about the perfect example of the kind of
 person he was.
Dad and the Banana Bread

Dad and the Banana Bread