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Be Like, Children, and Detroit: WIZARU speedoweedo on a list of dumb shit i know: the grass in the original shrek movie is not grass. its hair. they used hair textures for the grass bc the actual grass for some reason in their computer modelling programs would not behave like grass so they used hair textures colored green. speedoweedo elvis presley was a registered DEA officer who asked nixon for the title and was awarded it. ndiecity What else? WIZARD speedoweedo the great escape artist houdini was living in a time period where mysticism, fortune telling, ouija boards, seances and etc were becoming very common place and trendy. and he fucking hated it so much. so much that he would go to seances in disguise and make some bullshit off the wall shit like "my son died last year can you let me talk to him" and the seance person would be like 'THIS IS YOUR SON HELLO FATHER then he'd rip off his disguise and be like YOU FRAUD I HAVE NO CHILDREN. He died on Halloween night in detroit and as far as i know every year they hold seances on halloween trying to get in contact with his spirit. If seances work i bet his ghost is just pissed off and not responding out of raw spite speedoweedo foxes cant snarl like dogs and wolves cus the muscles in their muzzle dont allowe it so they just drop their jaws and scream. simon-newman Brain: *An extremely obscure fact from the subject I never studied in my life* Me: How the f*ck do we know this? Brain: I don't know! Both: *Screaming* lolpics/AstroFunny I really like some of these.
Be Like, Children, and Detroit: WIZARU
 speedoweedo
 on a list of dumb shit i know:
 the grass in the original shrek movie is not
 grass. its hair. they used hair textures for
 the grass bc the actual grass for some
 reason in their computer modelling
 programs would not behave like grass so
 they used hair textures colored green.
 speedoweedo
 elvis presley was a registered DEA officer
 who asked nixon for the title and was
 awarded it.
 ndiecity
 What else?
 WIZARD
 speedoweedo
 the great escape artist houdini was living in
 a time period where mysticism, fortune
 telling, ouija boards, seances and etc were
 becoming very common place and trendy.
 and he fucking hated it so much. so much
 that he would go to seances in disguise
 and make some bullshit off the wall shit like
 "my son died last year can you let me talk
 to him" and the seance person would be
 like 'THIS IS YOUR SON HELLO FATHER
 then he'd rip off his disguise and be like
 YOU FRAUD I HAVE NO CHILDREN.
 He died on Halloween night in detroit and
 as far as i know every year they hold
 seances on halloween trying to get in
 contact with his spirit. If seances work i bet
 his ghost is just pissed off and not
 responding out of raw spite
 speedoweedo
 foxes cant snarl like dogs and wolves cus
 the muscles in their muzzle dont allowe it
 so they just drop their jaws and scream.
 simon-newman
 Brain: *An extremely obscure fact from the
 subject I never studied in my life*
 Me: How the f*ck do we know this?
 Brain: I don't know!
 Both: *Screaming*
 lolpics/AstroFunny
I really like some of these.

I really like some of these.

New York, Australia, and Flight: Don't fly me, It has been reported that an employee for Ansett Australia (Airlines), who happened to have the last name of Gay, got on a plane recently using the company's 'Free Flight' offer for staff. However, when Mr Gay tried to take his seat, he found it being occupied by a fare paying passenger. So, not to make a fuss, he simply chose another seat. Unknown to Mr Gay another Ansett flight at the airport experienced mechanical problems. The passengers of this flight were being re-routed to various other airplanes A few were put on Mr Gay's flight and anyone who was holding a free ticket was being 'bumped. Ansett officials, armed with a list of these freebee' ticket holders boarded the plane, as is the practise, to remove them in favour of fare paying passengers. Of course, our Mr Gay was not sitting in his assigned seat as you may remember. So when the Ticket Agent approached the seat where Mr Gay was supposed to be sitting, she asked a startled customer "Are you gay?" The man, shyly nodded that he was, at which point she demanded: "Then you have to get off the plane." Mr Gay, overhearing what the Agent had said, tried to clear up the situation: "You've got the wrong man. I'm Gay!" This caused an angry third passenger to yell "Hell! I'm gay too! They can't kick us all off! Confusion reined as more and more passengers began yelling that Ansett had no right to remove gays from their flights. New York Times The Plane Had a Hard Time Flying Straight After That
New York, Australia, and Flight: Don't fly me,
 It has been reported that an
 employee for Ansett Australia
 (Airlines), who happened to have the last name of Gay, got
 on a plane recently using the company's 'Free Flight' offer
 for staff. However, when Mr Gay tried to take his seat, he
 found it being occupied by a fare paying passenger.
 So, not to make a fuss, he simply chose another seat. Unknown to Mr Gay
 another Ansett flight at the airport experienced mechanical problems. The
 passengers of this flight were being re-routed to various other airplanes
 A few were put on Mr Gay's flight and anyone who was holding a free
 ticket was being 'bumped. Ansett officials, armed with a list of these
 freebee' ticket holders boarded the plane, as is the practise, to remove
 them in favour of fare paying passengers. Of course, our Mr Gay was not
 sitting in his assigned seat as you may remember. So when the Ticket Agent
 approached the seat where Mr Gay was supposed to be sitting, she asked a
 startled customer "Are you gay?" The man, shyly nodded that he was, at
 which point she demanded: "Then you have to get off the plane."
 Mr Gay, overhearing what the Agent had said, tried to clear up the
 situation: "You've got the wrong man. I'm Gay!" This caused an angry
 third passenger to yell "Hell! I'm gay too! They can't kick us all off!
 Confusion reined as more and more passengers began yelling that Ansett
 had no right to remove gays from their flights. New York Times
The Plane Had a Hard Time Flying Straight After That

The Plane Had a Hard Time Flying Straight After That

Drinking, Drunk, and Food: Jennifer Dziura I've responded to this elsewhere around the Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks are often intending to purchase a lowering of the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in a bar and a man offers to buy you a this: cheerfully ask for something nonalcoholic, while indicating get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just trying to strike up conversation: they wanted you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In my own experience, I have twice been offered a drink and instead suggested food -- in both cases, very inexpensive food costing the same or less than a drink drink, try willingness to a and in both -- cases, the man responded angrily. 2 minutes ago Like Reply Jennifer Dziura In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I was starving and suggested the kebab place around the corner. I can't remember who paid, but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy pouted and I never saw him again. The other time, I had done standup in a bar and an older guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually would love some popcorn, which was sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry and acted like I had cheated him somehow. being greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious Scary, scary. Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So: Tips for getting drinks- 1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time. 3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol: Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail: X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state. Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%. Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%. Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21% Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%. Hope this helps someone out! Backing this up from years of bar tending.
Drinking, Drunk, and Food: Jennifer Dziura
 I've responded to this elsewhere around the
 Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks
 are often intending to purchase a lowering of
 the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in
 a bar and a man offers to buy you a
 this: cheerfully ask for something
 nonalcoholic, while indicating
 get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will
 be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just
 trying to strike up conversation: they wanted
 you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In
 my own experience, I have twice been offered
 a drink and instead suggested food -- in both
 cases, very inexpensive food costing the
 same or less than a drink
 drink, try
 willingness to
 a
 and in both
 --
 cases, the man responded angrily.
 2 minutes ago Like Reply
 Jennifer Dziura
 In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked
 him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I
 was starving and suggested the kebab place
 around the corner. I can't remember who paid,
 but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy
 pouted and I never saw him again. The other
 time, I had done standup in a bar and an older
 guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually
 would love some popcorn, which was
 sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry
 and acted like I had cheated him somehow.
 being
greek-god-of-hair:


erwin-with-hairpins:

rainfelt:

cardozzza:

notyourexrotic:

(source)

Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious

Scary, scary.


Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:
Tips for getting drinks-
1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 
2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.
3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:
X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!


Backing this up from years of bar tending.

greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberat...

Club, Dogs, and Lgbt: Discord -111 2:25 PM Tweet Love, Noelle @lesbianhamlet 2/25/18 A website like @doesthedogdie but for LGBT characters. Does the gay die? 2 Does the Dog Die @doesthedog...。2d 、 What are some example movies where this happens? Love, Noelle @lesbianhamlet 2d Brokeback Mountain, Atomic Blonde, Bent, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, Braveheart, A Single Man, Cloud Atlas, Black Swan, Philadelphia, Rent, Dallas Buyers Club, The Normal Heart, Mulholland Drive, Milk, Holding the Man, Four Weddings and a Funeral, Another Country, Deathtrap Does the Dog Die @doesthedogdie Tweet your reply Discord -111 2:25 PM Tweet oes the Dog Die @doesthedogdie Replying to @lesbianhamlet "Does a LGBT person die?" is an option now on doesthedogdie.com. Thanks for the suggestion! /28/18, 2:17 PM Tweet your reply unicornlamps: curface: omgkalyppso: pennie-dreadful: lukenull: I made a difference in the world! REBLOG TO SAVE YOUR QUEER HEART FROM BREAKING I’ve seen a bunch of people in the notes concerned (like I was) of comparisons of members of the lgbt to dogs: but upon visiting their website I was reassured that they monitor a variety of content, including (but not limited to): THIS IS A GOOD SITE If you guys havent checked out their website yet, I would highly seggust it. They frequently add new triggers to the list of things they track, and in the information is crowdsourced, so you can rest assured that the information they give on movies does not only come from a single corporate source
Club, Dogs, and Lgbt: Discord -111
 2:25 PM
 Tweet
 Love, Noelle @lesbianhamlet 2/25/18
 A website like @doesthedogdie but for
 LGBT characters. Does the gay die?
 2
 Does the Dog Die @doesthedog...。2d 、
 What are some example movies where
 this happens?
 Love, Noelle @lesbianhamlet 2d
 Brokeback Mountain, Atomic Blonde,
 Bent, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel,
 Braveheart, A Single Man, Cloud Atlas,
 Black Swan, Philadelphia, Rent, Dallas
 Buyers Club, The Normal Heart,
 Mulholland Drive, Milk, Holding the
 Man, Four Weddings and a Funeral,
 Another Country, Deathtrap
 Does the Dog Die
 @doesthedogdie
 Tweet your reply

 Discord -111
 2:25 PM
 Tweet
 oes the Dog Die
 @doesthedogdie
 Replying to @lesbianhamlet
 "Does a LGBT person die?" is an
 option now on doesthedogdie.com.
 Thanks for the suggestion!
 /28/18, 2:17 PM
 Tweet your reply
unicornlamps:

curface:

omgkalyppso:

pennie-dreadful:

lukenull:
I made a difference in the world!

REBLOG TO SAVE YOUR QUEER HEART FROM BREAKING


I’ve seen a bunch of people in the notes concerned (like I was) of comparisons of members of the lgbt to dogs: but upon visiting their website I was reassured that they monitor a variety of content, including (but not limited to):




THIS IS A GOOD SITE


If you guys havent checked out their website yet, I would highly seggust it. They frequently add new triggers to the list of things they track, and in the information is crowdsourced, so you can rest assured that the information they give on movies does not only come from a single corporate source

unicornlamps: curface: omgkalyppso: pennie-dreadful: lukenull: I made a difference in the world! REBLOG TO SAVE YOUR QUEER HEART FROM B...

Bad, Cookies, and Dad: Godzilla Tag Yourself That Ain't Falco Didn't forget what you did -Best in track -Is there Grumpy Cat Butterfly I say your justice qoes too far! -Sometimes smol Good dad r you but Badderfly justice doesn't go you mock in -drives environmentally -Good Babysitter -Is on your side Einstein -Wants everyone to be friends middle school too far enough! friendly car Can count how many -Wasn't invited -Screams moth friend wants to be helpful are about fensive on one hand. -Kinda Selish -Needs to slow down Boba Fett Didn't do much Kanga-Rex Palpatine Kamacurry -Mob mentality -Always blends in -Tries st kicks uly Talks big game Itsy Bitsy -loved by all -Great at extreme sports Doeshtgive a hood Moral Support -Awesome -Kinda overrated -Only one who sees the big picture -Stunt double ary aks big Cam Might not even be real Has the laugh that gets everyone going -Secretly a toad pams twitch chat school -Makes a egg casserole Literal grime Savage even when not trying -Used to be a big deal -Don't disturb -Got big plans SPAAACE Monty Mole r but doesn't rare Is just here to raise the roof. Mecha Ghidio u but smarter -Sophisticated horoscope reader -Probably had too much coffee-Just wants to rule the world -Back by unpopular demand Little Shop of Horrors -Who are you? I'm you but less privileged -Has taken up a new leaf handlla s but thinks he could -Knows there isn't a spoon. All according to plan -Won't leave his couch fort a trench coat a pokemon Sill is hut can't kiss Is probably only good because it benefits him -ls in a bad mood and fixing to take it out on you -ls so done all the timeA Frieza Switches to vour main after beating you in smash bros -Looks up to Jason Voorhees s hetter than Knows it Lovebirds -Brings a tactical warhead on first date -cocky teens Lil Green -Awkward phase Diggersby -smoler -picks on things more e True Armadillo Facts Red Lobster Mis Ghidio the downtrodder -Good with electronics Hates spicy foods -Good guard dog -Came to attack people and is having a good time l -pure -Didn't ask for this small than him -Didn't deserve any of this -Except for that one time -Surprisingly Reliable T peo -Notorious party crasher -Easy Target ple's hero -Won't die -has regrets -Came for f T -esteem F-Type Master Splinter Titanic Tuna Is with the wrong crowd nut learned ett tt in Megatron - Has no clue what you? I'm vou Robot Chicken of JUSTICE but shinier he's doing ececut bimself in -Lonely piggyback rides -Communicates -Doesn't know why he's here but is happy to help is head -Goodenforcer Hator mat woodshop Edgemeister anybody's way mbs ups Has the best pokerface-Will conquer the worldSneaks by auoting fortune cookies List of skills include bi best breaking things sily influenced Has 50 different Will wreck you in karaoke -Is there for you -Never not smiling -Good cop in to ways to kill you -big bro friend his tunes Fullmetal Kirby Flygon Grouchy Kitty -Who are you? not you, Who are you? I'm you but aping-Who are you? I'm a bug Who are you? The terminator have promising future Still voung at heart" -I don't have that. I need it.-Listens to Three Days Grace on full blast Still does? The queen imlot of crap for Insecure -Intentionally has dog poop your lawn Came to ruin everything Now brute forces everything -It's mine now eating habits -Identity crisis -Most expressive -ls a black belt Mayhe redeemable -Just wants to go on a family picnic .Drinks tears -killed a man plays a golden fiddle -beloved scum andrewtheamericandude: Some of these are stupid jokes that even I don’t get 
Bad, Cookies, and Dad: Godzilla Tag Yourself
 That Ain't Falco
 Didn't forget what you did -Best in track
 -Is there
 Grumpy Cat
 Butterfly
 I say your justice qoes too far!
 -Sometimes smol
 Good dad
 r you but
 Badderfly
 justice doesn't go
 you mock in
 -drives environmentally
 -Good Babysitter
 -Is on your side Einstein -Wants everyone to be friends
 middle school
 too far enough!
 friendly car
 Can count how many
 -Wasn't invited
 -Screams
 moth friend
 wants to be helpful
 are about
 fensive
 on one hand.
 -Kinda Selish
 -Needs to slow down
 Boba Fett
 Didn't do much
 Kanga-Rex
 Palpatine
 Kamacurry
 -Mob mentality
 -Always blends in
 -Tries
 st kicks
 uly
 Talks big game
 Itsy Bitsy
 -loved by all
 -Great at extreme sports Doeshtgive a hood
 Moral Support
 -Awesome
 -Kinda overrated
 -Only one who sees the
 big picture
 -Stunt double
 ary
 aks big Cam
 Might not even be real
 Has the laugh that
 gets everyone going
 -Secretly a toad
 pams twitch chat
 school
 -Makes a
 egg casserole
 Literal grime
 Savage even when
 not trying
 -Used to be a big deal
 -Don't disturb
 -Got big plans
 SPAAACE
 Monty Mole
 r but doesn't rare
 Is just here to raise the roof.
 Mecha Ghidio
 u but smarter
 -Sophisticated horoscope reader
 -Probably had too much coffee-Just wants to rule the world
 -Back by unpopular demand
 Little Shop of Horrors
 -Who are you? I'm you but
 less privileged
 -Has taken up a new leaf
 handlla s but thinks he could
 -Knows there isn't a spoon.
 All according to plan
 -Won't leave his couch fort
 a trench coat
 a pokemon
 Sill is hut can't kiss
 Is probably only good because it
 benefits him
 -ls in a bad mood and fixing
 to take it out on you
 -ls so done all the timeA
 Frieza
 Switches to vour main after
 beating you in smash bros
 -Looks up to Jason Voorhees
 s hetter than
 Knows it
 Lovebirds
 -Brings a tactical warhead on first date
 -cocky teens
 Lil Green
 -Awkward phase
 Diggersby
 -smoler
 -picks on things more
 e
 True Armadillo Facts
 Red Lobster
 Mis
 Ghidio
 the
 downtrodder
 -Good with electronics Hates spicy foods
 -Good guard dog
 -Came to attack people and is having a good time
 l
 -pure
 -Didn't ask for this
 small than him
 -Didn't deserve any of this
 -Except for that one time
 -Surprisingly Reliable
 T peo
 -Notorious party crasher
 -Easy Target
 ple's hero
 -Won't die
 -has regrets
 -Came for f
 T -esteem
 F-Type
 Master Splinter
 Titanic Tuna
 Is with the wrong crowd nut learned
 ett tt in
 Megatron
 - Has no clue what
 you? I'm vou
 Robot Chicken
 of JUSTICE
 but shinier
 he's doing
 ececut bimself in
 -Lonely
 piggyback rides
 -Communicates
 -Doesn't know why he's here
 but is happy to help
 is head
 -Goodenforcer
 Hator mat
 woodshop
 Edgemeister
 anybody's way
 mbs ups Has the best pokerface-Will conquer the worldSneaks by auoting fortune cookies
 List of skills include
 bi best
 breaking things
 sily influenced
 Has 50 different
 Will wreck you in karaoke
 -Is there for you
 -Never not smiling
 -Good cop
 in to
 ways to kill you
 -big bro friend
 his tunes
 Fullmetal
 Kirby
 Flygon
 Grouchy Kitty
 -Who are you?
 not you,
 Who are you? I'm you but aping-Who are you? I'm a bug
 Who are you? The terminator
 have promising future
 Still voung at heart"
 -I don't have that. I need it.-Listens to Three Days Grace
 on full blast
 Still does?
 The queen
 imlot of crap for Insecure
 -Intentionally has dog poop
 your lawn
 Came to ruin everything
 Now brute forces everything
 -It's mine now
 eating habits
 -Identity crisis
 -Most expressive
 -ls a black belt
 Mayhe redeemable
 -Just wants to go on a family picnic
 .Drinks tears
 -killed a man
 plays a golden fiddle
 -beloved scum
andrewtheamericandude:

Some of these are stupid jokes that even I don’t get 

andrewtheamericandude: Some of these are stupid jokes that even I don’t get