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        In 2016
        

            
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In 2016

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        The
        

            
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The

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Lalaland
        

            
            Lalaland
        

    

    

         
Lalaland

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Wonned
        

            
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Wonned

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Liking
        

            
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Liking

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        attack
        

            
            attack
        

    

    

         
attack

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        won
        

            
            won
        

    

    

         
won

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         listings
        

            
             listings
        

    

    

         
 listings

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         landing
        

            
             landing
        

    

    

         
 landing

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         floored
        

            
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 floored

    



                
            

        

    
    

        🔥 | Latest
    

    
    

        

        
        

            

                




    Funny, Ken, and Sorry: Jastinder Khera
 @KheraJas
 My German isn't perfect yet but l think
 this means... they are not taking us
 entirely seriously
 Die Presse DONNERSTAG, 29 NOVEMBER 201
 EUROPAIS
 Der Brexit als Monty-Python-Sketch
 rur das Land vorteilhaft sei -ihr eigener Finanz
 nien/EU. Premierministerin Theresa May besteht darauf, dass ihr Austrittsdeal
 minister behauptet zeitgleich das Gegenteil.
 VON MICHAEL LACZYNSKI
 werden können. Philip Hammond sprach Neuwahlen bis hin zu einem zwetten Brexit
 kırz vor Mays Auftritt im Unterhaus das Of- Referendum oder einem Chaos-Breat am
 gebe keine Brexit-Vari 29. März 2019. Insolerm ist es nicht verwun-
 Das
 innenpolitische Gezerre in fensichtliche aus: Es
 i
 Großbritannien um den EU-Austritt nimmt ante, die sich für
 immer absurdere Züge an. Der gestrige Auf lich
 tritt von Premierministerin Theresa May im die EU-Mit
 Unterhaus erinnerte phasenweise an den Sc
 berühmten Sketch der britischen Komiker-
 truppe Monty Python, bei dem der Verkäu
 n wirtschaft derlich, dass man sich in London auch Ge
 danken über eine Unterbre-
 chung des Countdowns Gedan
 ken macht. Diese Obertegun
 gen beschäftigen auch den
 EuGH. Die Höchstrichtert der
 mehr rentieren würde als
 sagte der
 r in cinem BBC-In-
 terview
 Der Regierungschefin steht
 fer
 EU müssen sich derzelt mit
 In einer Tierhandlung einen misstraul:
 nun eine
 Frage befassen, ob Großbritan
 schen Kunden davon überzeugen will, der Sie muss die durchwegs skepti
 von ihm erstandene ausgestopfte Papagei schen
 sei nicht tot, sondern mache lediglich ein überzeugen, am 11. Dezember
 Mittagsschläfchen. Der von ihr ausgehan- für das Austrittsabkommen zu
 delte Brexit-Deal werde das Land wohlha stimmen. Sisyphos deshalb, Schatzkanzler
 nien auf eigene Faust aus der
 im Artikel 50 des EU-Vertra
 geregelten zweijährigen A
 trittsprozess aussteigen ka
 bender machen, beteuerte May während weil so gut wie alle Beobachter Philip Hammond Nein, argumentieren die
 wälte von EU-K
 davon ausgehen, dass May bei
 die Experten ihrer Regierung zur selben Zeit
 das genaue Gegenteil behaupteten.
 dem bevorstehenden Votum im Unterhaus Rat denn sonst könnte der Artikel 50
 Nach einem Mittwochmittag veröffent- eine Niederlage kassieren wird. Was dann Erpressung der restlichen Unionsmitg
 missbraucht werden. Der EuGH-Gene
 lichten Regierungsbericht wird der EU-Aus passieren wird, ist völlig offen
 walt wird sein Gutachten zu der Cau
 Die Bandbreite der S
 en reicht
 t u den von der Regierungschefin v
 ungen in Brüssel über 4. Dezember vorlegen.
 29/11/2018, 07:44
 1,306 Retweets 3,272 Likes
literallyaria:
langernameohnebedeutung:

enraged-fangirl-and-co:

The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either
Sorry guys

I’m not saying there is a common theme here, but…


I just want to add that the spanish one specifically states that brexit is like a monty python sketch, but less funny

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Funny, Ken, and Sorry: Jastinder Khera
 @KheraJas
 My German isn't perfect yet but l think
 this means... they are not taking us
 entirely seriously
 Die Presse DONNERSTAG, 29 NOVEMBER 201
 EUROPAIS
 Der Brexit als Monty-Python-Sketch
 rur das Land vorteilhaft sei -ihr eigener Finanz
 nien/EU. Premierministerin Theresa May besteht darauf, dass ihr Austrittsdeal
 minister behauptet zeitgleich das Gegenteil.
 VON MICHAEL LACZYNSKI
 werden können. Philip Hammond sprach Neuwahlen bis hin zu einem zwetten Brexit
 kırz vor Mays Auftritt im Unterhaus das Of- Referendum oder einem Chaos-Breat am
 gebe keine Brexit-Vari 29. März 2019. Insolerm ist es nicht verwun-
 Das
 innenpolitische Gezerre in fensichtliche aus: Es
 i
 Großbritannien um den EU-Austritt nimmt ante, die sich für
 immer absurdere Züge an. Der gestrige Auf lich
 tritt von Premierministerin Theresa May im die EU-Mit
 Unterhaus erinnerte phasenweise an den Sc
 berühmten Sketch der britischen Komiker-
 truppe Monty Python, bei dem der Verkäu
 n wirtschaft derlich, dass man sich in London auch Ge
 danken über eine Unterbre-
 chung des Countdowns Gedan
 ken macht. Diese Obertegun
 gen beschäftigen auch den
 EuGH. Die Höchstrichtert der
 mehr rentieren würde als
 sagte der
 r in cinem BBC-In-
 terview
 Der Regierungschefin steht
 fer
 EU müssen sich derzelt mit
 In einer Tierhandlung einen misstraul:
 nun eine
 Frage befassen, ob Großbritan
 schen Kunden davon überzeugen will, der Sie muss die durchwegs skepti
 von ihm erstandene ausgestopfte Papagei schen
 sei nicht tot, sondern mache lediglich ein überzeugen, am 11. Dezember
 Mittagsschläfchen. Der von ihr ausgehan- für das Austrittsabkommen zu
 delte Brexit-Deal werde das Land wohlha stimmen. Sisyphos deshalb, Schatzkanzler
 nien auf eigene Faust aus der
 im Artikel 50 des EU-Vertra
 geregelten zweijährigen A
 trittsprozess aussteigen ka
 bender machen, beteuerte May während weil so gut wie alle Beobachter Philip Hammond Nein, argumentieren die
 wälte von EU-K
 davon ausgehen, dass May bei
 die Experten ihrer Regierung zur selben Zeit
 das genaue Gegenteil behaupteten.
 dem bevorstehenden Votum im Unterhaus Rat denn sonst könnte der Artikel 50
 Nach einem Mittwochmittag veröffent- eine Niederlage kassieren wird. Was dann Erpressung der restlichen Unionsmitg
 missbraucht werden. Der EuGH-Gene
 lichten Regierungsbericht wird der EU-Aus passieren wird, ist völlig offen
 walt wird sein Gutachten zu der Cau
 Die Bandbreite der S
 en reicht
 t u den von der Regierungschefin v
 ungen in Brüssel über 4. Dezember vorlegen.
 29/11/2018, 07:44
 1,306 Retweets 3,272 Likes
literallyaria:
langernameohnebedeutung:

enraged-fangirl-and-co:

The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either
Sorry guys

I’m not saying there is a common theme here, but…


I just want to add that the spanish one specifically states that brexit is like a monty python sketch, but less funny

                
            

            
            
literallyaria:
langernameohnebedeutung:

enraged-fangirl-and-co:

The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either
Sorry guys

I’m not...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills


    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills


                
            

            
            
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills



            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills


    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills


                
            

            
            
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills



            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP
 (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH)
 DO ANY OF THESE EXIST?
 NO INDEPENDENT CANADA
 US TERRITORY OF ALASKA
 TOKYO
 ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE?
 START
 DOES THE SOVET
 UNION EXIST?
 CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL
 THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE?
 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA
 A GIANT FRENCH BLOB?
 SAUDI
 YES
 1805 OR EARUER
 (BEFORE THIS POINT
 THE MODERN IDEAOF
 ACOMPLETE POLITICAL
 MAP OF THEWORLD
 GETS HARD TOAPPLY
 ARABIA?
 THE
 SOVIET
 UNION? NO
 ZAIRE?
 OR HONG KONG (UK
 DOES THE OTTOMAN
 1922-1932
 YES
 EPIRE EXIST?
 SOUTH AFRICA?
 NO
 YES
 HOW MANY VIETNAMS
 ARE THERE?
 992-96
 AUSTRIA
 HUNGARY?
 NORTH KOREA?
 SAINT
 TRIMBLES
 ISLAND
 SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE..
 ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES
 NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF
 THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY?
 THE UNITED
 STATES?
 NO YES
 HOU SURE ARE
 YOU THAT THIS MAP
 IS IN ENGLISH?
 WHAT?
 PAKISTAN?
 BANGLADESH?
 YES
 NOIMADE
 THAT ONE UP
 LENINGRAD?
 NOYES
 1919-23 1124-29
 HOU MANY SUDANS
 ARE THERE?
 RHODESIA?
 EAST TIMOR?
 NO
 YES
 972-75
 ALBANIA?
 CAN YOU SEE
 THE FAMIUAR
 CONTINENTS?
 NO YES
 1910-12 1915-18
 1997-2001 2002-06
 TEXAS IS..
 PARTOF
 MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US
 DENT
 834-45
 2007-
 HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE?
 TUO
 CAMBODIA?
 PARTOF
 THIS SOUNDS LIKE
 A PHYSICAL MAP OR
 SATELLITE PHOTO
 "COLORADO OR
 "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE
 EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID?
 DANGER
 YES
 ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE
 1941-45
 IS CRIMEA
 DISPUTED?
 ISNORUAY
 PART OF SUEDEN?
 YES
 18%-1905 1906-09
 h-9h6l
 YES, THATS IT
 ERITREA IS PARTOF..
 EHОРА
 1952-53
 FLORIDA IS PARTOF..
 COLORADO
 204-2
 PERSIA OR IRAN?
 2012-13
 RIVERS SIRION
 OR ANDUIN?
 ITALY
 SPAIN
 THE US
 RAN
 PERSIA
 DOES THE UARNING
 MENTION THE SPIDERS?
 IS LAKE
 CHAD MISSING?
 1935-40
 1930-34
 IS BOLIVIA
 LANDLOCKED?
 JIMMY CARTER IS.
 BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE
 GANT SUMING RPESIT
 APRIL 20 1979
 VENEZUELA
 ANDOR
 ECUADOR?
 NO YES
 1818-29 1830-33
 THE UNITED
 ARAB REPUBLIC?
 NO
 1954-57 1958-60
 PARAGUAY?
 CANADA IS..
 MISSING FINE
 A PIECE
 1948
 YES
 1806-10 18-17
 2023 ORLATER
 2022
 CAIR PARAVEL?
 1884-95
 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY?
 ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT
 1980
 IS THE ARAL
 SEA MISSING?
 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA.
 TANGANYIKA
 1961-64
 MOSSFLOUER?
 MORDOR?
 BUDA AND PEST
 OR BUDAPEST?
 1981
 1976-79
 DOES RUSSIA BORDER
 THE SEA OF JAPAN?
 TANZANIA
 BRITISH
 1965-71
 960
 1970s-90s 20O0st
 REDUALL
 WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA?
 KOLONIA
 BUDA AND BUDAPEST
 PEST
 PAUKIR
 1873-83
 1858-67
 IS THE WORLD ON THE
 BACK OF A TURTUE?
 NO
 DISCWORLD
 THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN
 ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS..
 HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES
 1868-72
 NOMENOR?
 YES NO
 LATE
 SECOND AGE
 BELERIAND?
 REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER
 VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO?
 THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS.
 WEIRD
 FIRST EARLY
 AGE SECOND AGE
 NORMAL
 854-56
 1948-49
 1950-52
 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO
 1982-84
 846-53
 ARE YOU SURE
 THIS IS A MAP?
 CALORMEN?
 1985-88
 THE FOREST EASTOF THE
 MISTY MOUNTAINS IS..
 IS IT TRYING
 HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH?
 THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA
 1830s-80s
 (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS)
 FOUR
 1989-EARLY 1990
 TO BITE YOU?
 ?
 INDIANA
 UNAT PRAIRIES?
 GREENJOODI MRKJOOD
 THE GREAT
 EARLY
 THIRD AGE
 THE UOOD OF
 GREENLEAVES
 THREE
 MID-1990
 BEFORE
 1830
 LATE
 THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE
 LATE1990-199
 DID YOU MAKE
 IT YOURSELF?
 WEIRD
 RECURSIVE
 HEAVEN?
 15 THERE A BIG
 LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF
 SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA?
 (CREATED BY MISTAKE)
 I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN
 THE MIDDLE OF GHANA?
 (CREATED ON PURPOSE)
 NO
 1920s-505
 LOTTA
 1SLANDS?
 IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO?
 I5 IT LARGER
 THAN A BREADBOX?
 YES
 TUBA STAPLER THE SAME
 BERUNA
 FORDBRIDGE
 HISSES AND
 RUNS AWAY
 CAT
 SCREECHES AND FLAPS
 ARDUND THE ROOn
 BREAKING THINGE5
 YES
 ONE OF THE THE
 RANDOM LAST
 LATER BOOKS BATE
 NO YES
 ABOUT
 ITS VERY NICE.
 THANK YOU
 RELION PRINCE
 UEHE CASPIAN
 WARDROBE
 DALIN
 TREACER
 YES
 SEAGULL
 BREADBOX
 1860s-1900s
 1960s-70s
 1910s
land-of-maps:

this helps a lot
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP
 (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH)
 DO ANY OF THESE EXIST?
 NO INDEPENDENT CANADA
 US TERRITORY OF ALASKA
 TOKYO
 ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE?
 START
 DOES THE SOVET
 UNION EXIST?
 CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL
 THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE?
 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA
 A GIANT FRENCH BLOB?
 SAUDI
 YES
 1805 OR EARUER
 (BEFORE THIS POINT
 THE MODERN IDEAOF
 ACOMPLETE POLITICAL
 MAP OF THEWORLD
 GETS HARD TOAPPLY
 ARABIA?
 THE
 SOVIET
 UNION? NO
 ZAIRE?
 OR HONG KONG (UK
 DOES THE OTTOMAN
 1922-1932
 YES
 EPIRE EXIST?
 SOUTH AFRICA?
 NO
 YES
 HOW MANY VIETNAMS
 ARE THERE?
 992-96
 AUSTRIA
 HUNGARY?
 NORTH KOREA?
 SAINT
 TRIMBLES
 ISLAND
 SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE..
 ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES
 NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF
 THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY?
 THE UNITED
 STATES?
 NO YES
 HOU SURE ARE
 YOU THAT THIS MAP
 IS IN ENGLISH?
 WHAT?
 PAKISTAN?
 BANGLADESH?
 YES
 NOIMADE
 THAT ONE UP
 LENINGRAD?
 NOYES
 1919-23 1124-29
 HOU MANY SUDANS
 ARE THERE?
 RHODESIA?
 EAST TIMOR?
 NO
 YES
 972-75
 ALBANIA?
 CAN YOU SEE
 THE FAMIUAR
 CONTINENTS?
 NO YES
 1910-12 1915-18
 1997-2001 2002-06
 TEXAS IS..
 PARTOF
 MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US
 DENT
 834-45
 2007-
 HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE?
 TUO
 CAMBODIA?
 PARTOF
 THIS SOUNDS LIKE
 A PHYSICAL MAP OR
 SATELLITE PHOTO
 "COLORADO OR
 "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE
 EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID?
 DANGER
 YES
 ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE
 1941-45
 IS CRIMEA
 DISPUTED?
 ISNORUAY
 PART OF SUEDEN?
 YES
 18%-1905 1906-09
 h-9h6l
 YES, THATS IT
 ERITREA IS PARTOF..
 EHОРА
 1952-53
 FLORIDA IS PARTOF..
 COLORADO
 204-2
 PERSIA OR IRAN?
 2012-13
 RIVERS SIRION
 OR ANDUIN?
 ITALY
 SPAIN
 THE US
 RAN
 PERSIA
 DOES THE UARNING
 MENTION THE SPIDERS?
 IS LAKE
 CHAD MISSING?
 1935-40
 1930-34
 IS BOLIVIA
 LANDLOCKED?
 JIMMY CARTER IS.
 BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE
 GANT SUMING RPESIT
 APRIL 20 1979
 VENEZUELA
 ANDOR
 ECUADOR?
 NO YES
 1818-29 1830-33
 THE UNITED
 ARAB REPUBLIC?
 NO
 1954-57 1958-60
 PARAGUAY?
 CANADA IS..
 MISSING FINE
 A PIECE
 1948
 YES
 1806-10 18-17
 2023 ORLATER
 2022
 CAIR PARAVEL?
 1884-95
 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY?
 ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT
 1980
 IS THE ARAL
 SEA MISSING?
 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA.
 TANGANYIKA
 1961-64
 MOSSFLOUER?
 MORDOR?
 BUDA AND PEST
 OR BUDAPEST?
 1981
 1976-79
 DOES RUSSIA BORDER
 THE SEA OF JAPAN?
 TANZANIA
 BRITISH
 1965-71
 960
 1970s-90s 20O0st
 REDUALL
 WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA?
 KOLONIA
 BUDA AND BUDAPEST
 PEST
 PAUKIR
 1873-83
 1858-67
 IS THE WORLD ON THE
 BACK OF A TURTUE?
 NO
 DISCWORLD
 THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN
 ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS..
 HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES
 1868-72
 NOMENOR?
 YES NO
 LATE
 SECOND AGE
 BELERIAND?
 REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER
 VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO?
 THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS.
 WEIRD
 FIRST EARLY
 AGE SECOND AGE
 NORMAL
 854-56
 1948-49
 1950-52
 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO
 1982-84
 846-53
 ARE YOU SURE
 THIS IS A MAP?
 CALORMEN?
 1985-88
 THE FOREST EASTOF THE
 MISTY MOUNTAINS IS..
 IS IT TRYING
 HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH?
 THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA
 1830s-80s
 (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS)
 FOUR
 1989-EARLY 1990
 TO BITE YOU?
 ?
 INDIANA
 UNAT PRAIRIES?
 GREENJOODI MRKJOOD
 THE GREAT
 EARLY
 THIRD AGE
 THE UOOD OF
 GREENLEAVES
 THREE
 MID-1990
 BEFORE
 1830
 LATE
 THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE
 LATE1990-199
 DID YOU MAKE
 IT YOURSELF?
 WEIRD
 RECURSIVE
 HEAVEN?
 15 THERE A BIG
 LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF
 SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA?
 (CREATED BY MISTAKE)
 I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN
 THE MIDDLE OF GHANA?
 (CREATED ON PURPOSE)
 NO
 1920s-505
 LOTTA
 1SLANDS?
 IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO?
 I5 IT LARGER
 THAN A BREADBOX?
 YES
 TUBA STAPLER THE SAME
 BERUNA
 FORDBRIDGE
 HISSES AND
 RUNS AWAY
 CAT
 SCREECHES AND FLAPS
 ARDUND THE ROOn
 BREAKING THINGE5
 YES
 ONE OF THE THE
 RANDOM LAST
 LATER BOOKS BATE
 NO YES
 ABOUT
 ITS VERY NICE.
 THANK YOU
 RELION PRINCE
 UEHE CASPIAN
 WARDROBE
 DALIN
 TREACER
 YES
 SEAGULL
 BREADBOX
 1860s-1900s
 1960s-70s
 1910s
land-of-maps:

this helps a lot
                
            

            
            
land-of-maps:

this helps a lot

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
                
            

            
            
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
                
            

            
            
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Ash, Celtic, and Tumblr: Anglicisation of Urrow
 (Europe <*h,uru-wkw-)
 PLACE NAME ORIGIN
 Yeatbury
 Middy
 Durry
 Hamberfall
 Germanic
 Mormannish
 Italic
 Example reconstruction: Volgograd to Wulchyard
 ALcherer
 elend
 Celtic
 Hellenic
 Balto-Slavic
 other Indo-European
 non Indo-European
 mixed
 volga River
 Proto-Indo-European: *welg- (wet, damp)
 Balto-Slavic >walg- Germanic> "wulka- (from
 Reachwigh
 Smallish
 Erven
 Body
 oblique case "wlg-)
 Yannen
 Arryanglish
 Proto-Slavic vsigakt Old English >*wulc (cf. wolcn
 Archroom
 Lully
 'cloud, with /uf> ol due to non-
 high vowel in next syllable
 Russian>Bonra English wulk/wulch (cf swilk
 such, whilk/which, milk/milch, ilk
 ilch etc. for palatalisation)
 CASE STUDY- WITHEL (Italy)
 Eal
 Etymological breakdown of this
 map's forty-three Withelish cities
 Arabic
 Thrundham
 Umpny
 Fighey
 Thunnerhaven
 KEtruscan
 Messap
 Eastersound
 - grad -town, enclosure
 Proto-Indo-European: "g'ord"-os<g'erd- (to enclose)
 Balto-Slavic>"gardas Germanic > "gardaz
 Proto-Slavicgord Old English >geard
 Russian >rópoa English >yard
 ave
 <Latin
 Wass
 Soundswall fihlend
 whalve Bury
 Ealsound
 <Celtic
 Thavefand
 aldy sea
 fan
 Thamber
 Hitend
 Efchney
 norry Borling
 Berrywin
 Hervewig wat
 <Greek
 avbottomHelsing Wighoury
 Aslea
 Charlsted.
 NEarbrow
 St. Fetherbury
 Westrer Upsel
 Utter
 Haverdys
 eHastrem
 Danlim
 Stotcholmstlend
 aThord
 Fashew
 Righosten
 Yarlewel
 ranae
 Hasseh
 WellyNewyard
 Staving
 SWeeri.ch
 Sinquernis
 Opunthewquerdan
 oten d
 Edwinbury
 Thwer
 Yeatbury Linchippinpping
 Thalled
 Summer
 Ealburya Ewechippingotend Wingsfull
 lathew
 Walemear
 Marcaw
 TarrowYulShaw
 Wighbury
 Waysea halmer
 balty Lewy Dewyfu Widdifish
 Yelytch Ridgen
 Thull
 SQuellwest
 Newhastle n Orth
 Earhouse chippenhaven
 dermarc Malmy
 WenswhRosqurid
 Flensbury Burhoim
 Chile Strealsound
 Brimeavevey Arry thau Yedanch
 Seal
 lithewen
 Hewn.
 f ir elend Mannow iddlesburyS e a
 sea
 Devlin Every
 Smallish r o oslend
 Walow
 Nackenigh
 Harry weinerfirth
 efluil
 Liverpool Manhaster
 Snottingham
 Logds
 wallyard Willen Mennish Maylew Branch
 Sarthaw
 Livish
 Yarden
 Berrin
 Hambury Shithen
 Beverish
 vemarch Bermingham Greninge
 Hairthave a nglend arhamAlcburyBrimeam
 Warny
 Hursh
 hassystoon
 Bealstow b e alroos.
 Warrow Bright
 Oxford The HawAstledámi erPerlen Bicyeste
 Bilifd
 Hamble
 Fishser s omdun ahaster
 Arnat Fadstop Fannen
 Bealyard
 sum
 Hornwatl Fordsmouth anden e nissle bc Sawbuss al S Luvlin
 Hernetchew
 Britchelown
 Ampen, Masthright Whellen Erford
 be theechTend arriaw Handewy
 Yarrow
 Thrighten Wardlaw
 Hew
 Grensy
 Wulchyard
 Loughish Rewn
 Lighish
 Dannish
 Hammenishanver
 Bright nen FermittenburyFranchford
 Hambe WrithenRidden
 Quithmire
 Faldaw
 Lewy
 a wcea nemny
 llenFarry AycawrowanchewishThornfal Winny.
 Yan-
 Arstaw wulchdannish
 eheibegy whess
 Middyaroiage
 wharse Nandy
 Maryfal
 Wine&Nand Earlen. Thrass Stradbury Stoodyard RainburyWeen a w y ltchyardernewyEamen Rew
 Hassy
 Ratch efarry
 uthlendy
 Thurn Quirch
 maldew
 Paverwheane Pan Mair Yatch Quisnew Atteth
 Eachesburye Batty Lind Berthlew Niredgehat
 Fribury Durry Manwin.Saltbury
 Allratonelra ncheworpern
 Fighter
 eThurfall Yersen
 Rassendoor stearfal
 Leasen hstean a strichyeerer
 t ge Yardye palde
 ButhfightWearden
 ungerrt
 Grawen
 Elmwigh
 gKennow
 Hullermund- Lowdun
 Leese-Navy
 Deyw Siven Brassowle
 Rim
 aberfall
 Newroosish
 Sough
 h uven Marbury FesS
 awn
 All Harcen
 Burdyall Ferdnoth corntal Midlende
 Mundalyen Wallende
 Ewshe Thalse
 sen Falf
 Thimb
 Bury Thestee
 Thearen Wern Wind yS a v Therch Yill
 Pigh Sissen
 Humeasce
 wurry
 Pacdem
 Thevels
 BOwerish
 Wigh
 Earend
 Awth
 Pilvew
 Form Culfen V
 Mundwa ighmnigh Fi o h serve
 bassen Bealyard.charlaw
 Yestand
 Letchen St. Thetc er Massle Dlen Livern
 Aw
 swartmere
 armen
 Erven
 cuise
 Ford Brooch Waltheld Bury
 Hambury Salmenthy
 LMe MOUuay
 Spald hornguertushen Sap Fellowrn
 ELsher
 Writ
 Ness
 Fienen
 Ash
 Arth
 Samsen hurftess
 Archroom
 Basti ow Fer
 Harsy t h
 Ayaug
 Bury
 Candiedstch Harbough
 fordcall
 Lispen Hasterhaid
 CHethbury
 Yerrend
 Tharrarrilen
 Fadtaryhassow buller
 Modrigh Serchest
 Blighdew Yatter
 Allynearfall Itefa thmeat
 watterthy
 Room Thulden w sea
 Thetches
 Ban
 alven maytep
 Anger
 iver PadalS pe an Hastlen
 Elsy
 Tirepayer
 Pruss
 Essyhither Heaser Mid
 Welighserthurry Sanlurrow
 Newfall Fathend Thurenaster pp
 Safer Tharineg Luve asten Hather S
 Harve Thr
 Sackende
 Wallend, Foietchery
 Minnery
 Sas
 Pr Waller Whethelnigh channyhal
 Marden
 Earn Sevel Aartave
 ATve
 Sarten thurnen
 PMaller sea
 Arvel
 Massle
 rs
 all itchen
 ly
 gmurn
 MurtheLighendes
 Hassend
 Cassanthaves
 Mally cranthHartchen
 Thensle Hane Addene
 Andle
 Hatts
 athender
 inen
 ch Ascow sea
 Fadder Adden
 HalmethNowfiew
 barth
 Kipralder Almer
 Seft
 Thanger
 Fansarm Measesh
 Marsic SighelRidge Haver
 Yevle
 ursen Yalve
 Andsy
 sur e
 Traven
 sea
 Hathen
 Allchear
 Aircherd
 Arn
 Ump Thunse
 Raff Fess
 Word
 Seriow
 Ruth
 Dart Hamps
 Surry
 Stve Yestanden
 Chuver
 irry
 lavenen
 PerruthTammish
 SitterA
 Thur
 mild
 Wisher
 allchear
 thunse
 marrow
 middlemere
land-of-maps:

Anglicising Europe: If the Anglo-Saxons had been invited to dinner (everywhere). See comments for more
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Ash, Celtic, and Tumblr: Anglicisation of Urrow
 (Europe <*h,uru-wkw-)
 PLACE NAME ORIGIN
 Yeatbury
 Middy
 Durry
 Hamberfall
 Germanic
 Mormannish
 Italic
 Example reconstruction: Volgograd to Wulchyard
 ALcherer
 elend
 Celtic
 Hellenic
 Balto-Slavic
 other Indo-European
 non Indo-European
 mixed
 volga River
 Proto-Indo-European: *welg- (wet, damp)
 Balto-Slavic >walg- Germanic> "wulka- (from
 Reachwigh
 Smallish
 Erven
 Body
 oblique case "wlg-)
 Yannen
 Arryanglish
 Proto-Slavic vsigakt Old English >*wulc (cf. wolcn
 Archroom
 Lully
 'cloud, with /uf> ol due to non-
 high vowel in next syllable
 Russian>Bonra English wulk/wulch (cf swilk
 such, whilk/which, milk/milch, ilk
 ilch etc. for palatalisation)
 CASE STUDY- WITHEL (Italy)
 Eal
 Etymological breakdown of this
 map's forty-three Withelish cities
 Arabic
 Thrundham
 Umpny
 Fighey
 Thunnerhaven
 KEtruscan
 Messap
 Eastersound
 - grad -town, enclosure
 Proto-Indo-European: "g'ord"-os<g'erd- (to enclose)
 Balto-Slavic>"gardas Germanic > "gardaz
 Proto-Slavicgord Old English >geard
 Russian >rópoa English >yard
 ave
 <Latin
 Wass
 Soundswall fihlend
 whalve Bury
 Ealsound
 <Celtic
 Thavefand
 aldy sea
 fan
 Thamber
 Hitend
 Efchney
 norry Borling
 Berrywin
 Hervewig wat
 <Greek
 avbottomHelsing Wighoury
 Aslea
 Charlsted.
 NEarbrow
 St. Fetherbury
 Westrer Upsel
 Utter
 Haverdys
 eHastrem
 Danlim
 Stotcholmstlend
 aThord
 Fashew
 Righosten
 Yarlewel
 ranae
 Hasseh
 WellyNewyard
 Staving
 SWeeri.ch
 Sinquernis
 Opunthewquerdan
 oten d
 Edwinbury
 Thwer
 Yeatbury Linchippinpping
 Thalled
 Summer
 Ealburya Ewechippingotend Wingsfull
 lathew
 Walemear
 Marcaw
 TarrowYulShaw
 Wighbury
 Waysea halmer
 balty Lewy Dewyfu Widdifish
 Yelytch Ridgen
 Thull
 SQuellwest
 Newhastle n Orth
 Earhouse chippenhaven
 dermarc Malmy
 WenswhRosqurid
 Flensbury Burhoim
 Chile Strealsound
 Brimeavevey Arry thau Yedanch
 Seal
 lithewen
 Hewn.
 f ir elend Mannow iddlesburyS e a
 sea
 Devlin Every
 Smallish r o oslend
 Walow
 Nackenigh
 Harry weinerfirth
 efluil
 Liverpool Manhaster
 Snottingham
 Logds
 wallyard Willen Mennish Maylew Branch
 Sarthaw
 Livish
 Yarden
 Berrin
 Hambury Shithen
 Beverish
 vemarch Bermingham Greninge
 Hairthave a nglend arhamAlcburyBrimeam
 Warny
 Hursh
 hassystoon
 Bealstow b e alroos.
 Warrow Bright
 Oxford The HawAstledámi erPerlen Bicyeste
 Bilifd
 Hamble
 Fishser s omdun ahaster
 Arnat Fadstop Fannen
 Bealyard
 sum
 Hornwatl Fordsmouth anden e nissle bc Sawbuss al S Luvlin
 Hernetchew
 Britchelown
 Ampen, Masthright Whellen Erford
 be theechTend arriaw Handewy
 Yarrow
 Thrighten Wardlaw
 Hew
 Grensy
 Wulchyard
 Loughish Rewn
 Lighish
 Dannish
 Hammenishanver
 Bright nen FermittenburyFranchford
 Hambe WrithenRidden
 Quithmire
 Faldaw
 Lewy
 a wcea nemny
 llenFarry AycawrowanchewishThornfal Winny.
 Yan-
 Arstaw wulchdannish
 eheibegy whess
 Middyaroiage
 wharse Nandy
 Maryfal
 Wine&Nand Earlen. Thrass Stradbury Stoodyard RainburyWeen a w y ltchyardernewyEamen Rew
 Hassy
 Ratch efarry
 uthlendy
 Thurn Quirch
 maldew
 Paverwheane Pan Mair Yatch Quisnew Atteth
 Eachesburye Batty Lind Berthlew Niredgehat
 Fribury Durry Manwin.Saltbury
 Allratonelra ncheworpern
 Fighter
 eThurfall Yersen
 Rassendoor stearfal
 Leasen hstean a strichyeerer
 t ge Yardye palde
 ButhfightWearden
 ungerrt
 Grawen
 Elmwigh
 gKennow
 Hullermund- Lowdun
 Leese-Navy
 Deyw Siven Brassowle
 Rim
 aberfall
 Newroosish
 Sough
 h uven Marbury FesS
 awn
 All Harcen
 Burdyall Ferdnoth corntal Midlende
 Mundalyen Wallende
 Ewshe Thalse
 sen Falf
 Thimb
 Bury Thestee
 Thearen Wern Wind yS a v Therch Yill
 Pigh Sissen
 Humeasce
 wurry
 Pacdem
 Thevels
 BOwerish
 Wigh
 Earend
 Awth
 Pilvew
 Form Culfen V
 Mundwa ighmnigh Fi o h serve
 bassen Bealyard.charlaw
 Yestand
 Letchen St. Thetc er Massle Dlen Livern
 Aw
 swartmere
 armen
 Erven
 cuise
 Ford Brooch Waltheld Bury
 Hambury Salmenthy
 LMe MOUuay
 Spald hornguertushen Sap Fellowrn
 ELsher
 Writ
 Ness
 Fienen
 Ash
 Arth
 Samsen hurftess
 Archroom
 Basti ow Fer
 Harsy t h
 Ayaug
 Bury
 Candiedstch Harbough
 fordcall
 Lispen Hasterhaid
 CHethbury
 Yerrend
 Tharrarrilen
 Fadtaryhassow buller
 Modrigh Serchest
 Blighdew Yatter
 Allynearfall Itefa thmeat
 watterthy
 Room Thulden w sea
 Thetches
 Ban
 alven maytep
 Anger
 iver PadalS pe an Hastlen
 Elsy
 Tirepayer
 Pruss
 Essyhither Heaser Mid
 Welighserthurry Sanlurrow
 Newfall Fathend Thurenaster pp
 Safer Tharineg Luve asten Hather S
 Harve Thr
 Sackende
 Wallend, Foietchery
 Minnery
 Sas
 Pr Waller Whethelnigh channyhal
 Marden
 Earn Sevel Aartave
 ATve
 Sarten thurnen
 PMaller sea
 Arvel
 Massle
 rs
 all itchen
 ly
 gmurn
 MurtheLighendes
 Hassend
 Cassanthaves
 Mally cranthHartchen
 Thensle Hane Addene
 Andle
 Hatts
 athender
 inen
 ch Ascow sea
 Fadder Adden
 HalmethNowfiew
 barth
 Kipralder Almer
 Seft
 Thanger
 Fansarm Measesh
 Marsic SighelRidge Haver
 Yevle
 ursen Yalve
 Andsy
 sur e
 Traven
 sea
 Hathen
 Allchear
 Aircherd
 Arn
 Ump Thunse
 Raff Fess
 Word
 Seriow
 Ruth
 Dart Hamps
 Surry
 Stve Yestanden
 Chuver
 irry
 lavenen
 PerruthTammish
 SitterA
 Thur
 mild
 Wisher
 allchear
 thunse
 marrow
 middlemere
land-of-maps:

Anglicising Europe: If the Anglo-Saxons had been invited to dinner (everywhere). See comments for more
                
            

            
            
land-of-maps:

Anglicising Europe: If the Anglo-Saxons had been invited to dinner (everywhere). See comments for more

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    God, Target, and Tumblr: tumbimongo:
belladonna-27:

sixpenceee:

Medusa by Reza Sedhi

God, I wish that was me


God, i wish never put foot
 on land like these creatures🙃😱

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                God, Target, and Tumblr: tumbimongo:
belladonna-27:

sixpenceee:

Medusa by Reza Sedhi

God, I wish that was me


God, i wish never put foot
 on land like these creatures🙃😱

                
            

            
            
tumbimongo:
belladonna-27:

sixpenceee:

Medusa by Reza Sedhi

God, I wish that was me


God, i wish never put foot
 on land like these crea...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
                
            

            
            
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook