Bring
Bring

Bring

Cute Man
Cute Man

Cute Man

Are
Are

Are

Looks
Looks

Looks

Falls
Falls

Falls

A Little
A Little

A Little

Friendly
Friendly

Friendly

But
But

But

Cute Nigga
Cute Nigga

Cute Nigga

come-home
come-home

come-home

🔥 | Latest

Homeboy: 宋 Slay Follow @Foreverlighty My homeboy make 16 hundred a week but he only see $116.63 after child support... this is some fucked up stuff Earnings rate hours this tod Regular Overtime 18.5900 8.00 1.487.20 27,8850 4.88 136.08 Holiday Pay Paid Time Off Gross Pa $1,623.28 Deductions Statuto Federal Income Tax -149.03 Social Security Tax Medicare Tax 83.99 -19.65 Other -210.42 49.64 Core Health Dental Support Order Support Order Support Order Support Order 268.19 -231.79 233.30 -252.03 Vision 8.51 Net Pa Checking S116.73 -116.73 mother of kittens gi Follow @redheaded_wreck I'm glad he's seeing consequences for his actions of having irresponsible sex Maybe he should have kept his legs closed if he wasn't ready to take responsibility for his actions://// Slayd @Foreverlighty iMy homeboy make 16 hundred a week but he only see $116.63 after child support this is some fucked up stuff Show this thread 9:28 AM - 18 May 2019 11,656 Retweets 47,401 Likes C s divestedblackwoman: bichaotic: ophelias-revenge: unheavenlycreature: sugarkat: theambassadorposts: Why does it look like 4 support payments? 4 kids?? Or am I just reading shit wrong Four kids he wasn’t supporting until a court order demanded it. Possibly more than one. Honestly? Precisely zero sympathy for the dude. first of all that says he worked 80 hours before hitting ot so this is a biweekly check…anyway i went and found the twitter thread and in it the dude confirms his friend had 4 different kids by 4 different women. so please allow me to play the world’s smallest violin for him for being court mandated to help take care of the children he brought into this world :’( :’( clearly he didn’t decide to start strapping up after the first, second, or even third child so maybe number four will be enough to convince him Men really be out there knocking up women left right and center and telling women “but baby it feels so much better without a condom!” and voting for dudes who are banning abortion and they cry about how they can’t trust women on birth control and they’re abandoning kids all over the country but we’re supposed to cry when the court says pay for your kids in a system where welfare and WIC is fucking peanuts and won’t even cover breakfast daily. Fuck their crocodile tears! Where’s the laws for forced castrations after men are irresponsible and have two kids they don’t want to support? Men who don’t like abortion or don’t wanna pay child support can wear a condom or have a vasectomy!! No sympathy for deadbeats. Pay the fuck up.
Homeboy: 宋
 Slay
 Follow
 @Foreverlighty
 My homeboy make 16 hundred a week
 but he only see $116.63 after child
 support... this is some fucked up stuff

 Earnings
 rate
 hours
 this tod
 Regular
 Overtime
 18.5900 8.00
 1.487.20
 27,8850
 4.88
 136.08
 Holiday Pay
 Paid Time Off
 Gross Pa
 $1,623.28
 Deductions Statuto
 Federal Income Tax
 -149.03
 Social Security Tax
 Medicare Tax
 83.99
 -19.65
 Other
 -210.42
 49.64
 Core Health
 Dental
 Support Order
 Support Order
 Support Order
 Support Order
 268.19
 -231.79
 233.30
 -252.03
 Vision
 8.51
 Net Pa
 Checking
 S116.73
 -116.73

 mother of kittens
 gi
 Follow
 @redheaded_wreck
 I'm glad he's seeing consequences for
 his actions of having irresponsible sex
 Maybe he should have kept his legs
 closed if he wasn't ready to take
 responsibility for his actions:////
 Slayd @Foreverlighty
 iMy homeboy make 16 hundred a week but he only see
 $116.63 after child support this is some fucked up stuff
 Show this thread
 9:28 AM - 18 May 2019
 11,656 Retweets 47,401 Likes C
 s
divestedblackwoman:
bichaotic:

ophelias-revenge:

unheavenlycreature:


sugarkat:

theambassadorposts:
Why does it look like 4 support payments? 4 kids?? Or am I just reading shit wrong

Four kids he wasn’t supporting until a court order demanded it. Possibly more than one.
Honestly? Precisely zero sympathy for the dude.

first of all that says he worked 80 hours before hitting ot so this is a biweekly check…anyway i went and found the twitter thread and in it the dude confirms his friend had 4 different kids by 4 different women. so please allow me to play the world’s smallest violin for him for being court mandated to help take care of the children he brought into this world :’( :’( clearly he didn’t decide to start strapping up after the first, second, or even third child so maybe number four will be enough to convince him


Men really be out there knocking up women left right and center and telling women “but baby it feels so much better without a condom!” and voting for dudes who are banning abortion and they cry about how they can’t trust women on birth control and they’re abandoning kids all over the country but we’re supposed to cry when the court says pay for your kids in a system where welfare and WIC is fucking peanuts and won’t even cover breakfast daily. 
Fuck their crocodile tears! 
Where’s the laws for forced castrations after men are irresponsible and have two kids they don’t want to support? 


Men who don’t like abortion or don’t wanna pay child support can wear a condom or have a vasectomy!!


No sympathy for deadbeats. Pay the fuck up.

divestedblackwoman: bichaotic: ophelias-revenge: unheavenlycreature: sugarkat: theambassadorposts: Why does it look like 4 support p...

Homeboy: lastsonlost: siryouarebeingmocked: jlongbone: Batwoman: First Look | TRAILER REACTION @hello-kitty-senpai @formallyknownasjoesmother @nunyabizni @the-mighty-birdy @libertarirynn @robert-the-redhead-lover @omega-bellum @odinoco @thesocialjusticecourier @siryouarebeingmocked @cisnowflake @lastsonlost Turn down the volume or put on headphones, folks. Thaaat said, I bet her main character arc is going to be about being an edgy lesbian rebel. Kind of like Arrow, except Ollie’s always had to subvert the System, not flout it entirely. Like someone on Youtube said, the line should’ve been “when it fits me”. The Alfred-like character is Lucius Fox’s son, Luke. And in the comics, he’s Batwing II. In fact, he actively wanted to get recruited by Batman. If this version is anything like that, it would explain the Taser. “No guns, no killing!” But that version had MMA experience, and homeboy here certainly does not. Five bucks says Kate disarms him. Oh, and of course they think she’s Batman, because she stole his costume and doesn’t have the red wig yet! Duh! That’s not sexism, that’s branding! Incidentally, she started with short hair in the comics. The red wig is a decoy, so bad guys pull it, it comes off, and then she turns around and ruins their whole career. So it’s not actually the CW’s fault. Honestly, I gave up hope for any subtlety in this series when Kate conspicuously flirted with Kara less than five screentime minutes after she first appeared. “Did I mention I am a lesbian?” WHAT THE FUCK did they Luke Fox? The man is a brick shithouse made of Genius not a frightened little bitch with a stun gun. Wow that was… Something. I never dreamed it would be that bad. I would literally rather watch Captain Marvel.
Homeboy: lastsonlost:
siryouarebeingmocked:


jlongbone:



Batwoman: First Look | TRAILER REACTION


@hello-kitty-senpai @formallyknownasjoesmother @nunyabizni @the-mighty-birdy @libertarirynn @robert-the-redhead-lover @omega-bellum @odinoco @thesocialjusticecourier @siryouarebeingmocked @cisnowflake @lastsonlost

Turn down the volume or put on headphones, folks.
Thaaat said, I bet her main character arc is going to be about being an edgy lesbian rebel. Kind of like Arrow, except Ollie’s always had to subvert the System, not flout it entirely.
Like someone on Youtube said, the line should’ve been “when it fits me”.
The Alfred-like character is Lucius Fox’s son, Luke. And in the comics, he’s Batwing II. In fact, he actively wanted to get recruited by Batman. If this version is anything like that, it would explain the Taser. “No guns, no killing!” But that version had MMA experience, and homeboy here certainly does not. Five bucks says Kate disarms him.
Oh, and of course they think she’s Batman, because she stole his costume and doesn’t have the red wig yet! Duh! That’s not sexism, that’s branding!
Incidentally, she started with short hair in the comics. The red wig is a decoy, so bad guys pull it, it comes off, and then she turns around and ruins their whole career. So it’s not actually the CW’s fault.
Honestly, I gave up hope for any subtlety in this series when Kate conspicuously flirted with Kara less than five screentime minutes after she first appeared. “Did I mention I am a lesbian?”



WHAT THE FUCK did they Luke Fox?
The man is a brick shithouse made of Genius not a frightened little bitch with a stun gun.


Wow that was… Something. I never dreamed it would be that bad. I would literally rather watch Captain Marvel.

lastsonlost: siryouarebeingmocked: jlongbone: Batwoman: First Look | TRAILER REACTION @hello-kitty-senpai @formallyknownasjoesmoth...

Homeboy: i-should-be-writing-rn: inlovewithaleheather: thecuckoohaslanded: gerbthenerd: alexander-lamington: thelizardprincess: biglawbear: blacksirencry: swaglexander-the-great: #That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit  me tryna find out if this fool died “The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.” Holy shit And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!! Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this #AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS  I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN. There are many things that will kill you. [citation needed] There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST. There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in. Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN. Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus. It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish. The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the LD50 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you. DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS. Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE. A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND. Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough. I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin: “Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.” “The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.” Remember how the LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.   I DID SOME MATH.   IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.) Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.” THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY. And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria. Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine. Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE. IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST. And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death. Don’t touch the pretty shells. I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have. You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌
Homeboy: i-should-be-writing-rn:

inlovewithaleheather:

thecuckoohaslanded:


gerbthenerd:

alexander-lamington:


thelizardprincess:


biglawbear:


blacksirencry:

swaglexander-the-great:


#That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit 
me tryna find out if this fool died


“The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.”
Holy shit


And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore


Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!!


Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this



#AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS 
I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN.
There are many things that will kill you.

[citation needed]
There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST.
There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in.
Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN.
Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus.
It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish.
The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the 

LD50

 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you.
DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS.
Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE.
A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND.
Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough.
I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin:
“Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.”


“The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.”
Remember how the 

LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.  
I DID SOME MATH.  
IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.)
Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.”
THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY.
And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria.
Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine.
Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE.
IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST.
And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death.
Don’t touch the pretty shells.


I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have.


You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌

i-should-be-writing-rn: inlovewithaleheather: thecuckoohaslanded: gerbthenerd: alexander-lamington: thelizardprincess: biglawbea...

Homeboy: erohero depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect! me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week gay-jesus-probably families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be less stressful actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you, you're such a burden on this family kremeroyale Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt* My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the DUMBEST thing I've ever heard jackhasdreams Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm prescribing you 500 different medicines My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try taking a nap exjwthings My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this hilarious video I know you'd love atheistjwteen Therapist in media: serious face the whole time My therapist: "laughs awkwardly* skirriss therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]" my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT??? my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now andromedex Actual things my therapist has told me "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with context) "Damn girl you need to get your shit together." "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something that isn't bleach or memes." I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again fandomsohard my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the stupidest fucking shit Source: ierohero Tv advice vs professionalism
Homeboy: erohero
 depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I
 don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect!
 me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief
 what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready
 to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week
 gay-jesus-probably
 families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've
 researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you
 up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be
 less stressful
 actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but
 up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you,
 you're such a burden on this family
 kremeroyale
 Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt*
 My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the
 DUMBEST thing I've ever heard
 jackhasdreams
 Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really
 quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm
 prescribing you 500 different medicines
 My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first
 problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try
 taking a nap
 exjwthings
 My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this
 hilarious video I know you'd love
 atheistjwteen
 Therapist in media: serious face the whole time
 My therapist: "laughs awkwardly*
 skirriss
 therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I
 haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]"
 my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing
 me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU
 SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT???
 my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you
 like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or
 you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now
 andromedex
 Actual things my therapist has told me
 "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with
 context)
 "Damn girl you need to get your shit together."
 "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something
 that isn't bleach or memes."
 I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again
 fandomsohard
 my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the
 stupidest fucking shit
 Source: ierohero
Tv advice vs professionalism

Tv advice vs professionalism

Homeboy: erohero depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect! me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week gay-jesus-probably families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be less stressful actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you, you're such a burden on this family kremeroyale Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt* My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the DUMBEST thing I've ever heard jackhasdreams Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm prescribing you 500 different medicines My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try taking a nap exjwthings My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this hilarious video I know you'd love atheistjwteen Therapist in media: serious face the whole time My therapist: "laughs awkwardly* skirriss therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]" my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT??? my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now andromedex Actual things my therapist has told me "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with context) "Damn girl you need to get your shit together." "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something that isn't bleach or memes." I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again fandomsohard my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the stupidest fucking shit Source: ierohero Tv advice vs professionalism
Homeboy: erohero
 depressed kids in the media: I don't wanna go to therapy! I
 don't need help! I'm not some specimen for you to dissect!
 me, rollin up to my therapist's office and collapsing in relief
 what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready
 to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week
 gay-jesus-probably
 families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we've
 researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you
 up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be
 less stressful
 actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you're sad but
 up. why didn't you go to school today, what's wrong with you,
 you're such a burden on this family
 kremeroyale
 Therapists in the media: understanding head tilt*
 My real live therapist whom l adore: Natalie, that is the
 DUMBEST thing I've ever heard
 jackhasdreams
 Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really
 quiet while we talk about your feelings also I'm
 prescribing you 500 different medicines
 My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first
 problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let's try
 taking a nap
 exjwthings
 My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this
 hilarious video I know you'd love
 atheistjwteen
 Therapist in media: serious face the whole time
 My therapist: "laughs awkwardly*
 skirriss
 therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, "l'm afraid I
 haven't [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]"
 my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing
 me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU
 SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT???
 my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you
 like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or
 you can learn to keep it in balance... you're my padawan now
 andromedex
 Actual things my therapist has told me
 "You're bassicly a glorified sad lizard." (It makes sense with
 context)
 "Damn girl you need to get your shit together."
 "Go home and cry. Stop drinking in bathtubs. Eat something
 that isn't bleach or memes."
 I'll add more tomorrow after I see her again
 fandomsohard
 my actual therapist: can i just say, you worry about the
 stupidest fucking shit
 Source: ierohero
Tv advice vs professionalism

Tv advice vs professionalism