Overwhelm
Overwhelm

Overwhelm

sliding
 sliding

sliding

lighted
 lighted

lighted

my back
 my back

my back

award
 award

award

walls
 walls

walls

dones
 dones

dones

suns
 suns

suns

miny
 miny

miny

thoughts
 thoughts

thoughts

🔥 | Latest

gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've 3 ever done? I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS) walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person; he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship, and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face. He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how to be alive for today. It's painful to watch. But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could you... shift our barpat. yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting. And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe. He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may never appreciate the epic briliance of his laziness (since he's not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin, before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel. A little bit of a long read, but its worth it
gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've
 3
 ever done?
 I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the
 wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS)
 walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person;
 he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a
 bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just
 barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship,
 and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a
 big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face.
 He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how
 to be alive for today. It's painful to watch.
 But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the
 phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known
 I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could
 you... shift our barpat. yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts
 the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting.
 And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of
 sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall
 behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks
 slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just
 witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to
 adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees
 he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of
 his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel
 and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his
 eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe.
 He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at
 the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may
 never appreciate the epic briliance of his laziness (since he's
 not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next
 bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin,
 before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel.
A little bit of a long read, but its worth it

A little bit of a long read, but its worth it

gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've ever done? I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS) walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person; he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes puttinga big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face. He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how to be alive for today. It's painful to watch. But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting. And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees, he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe. He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin, before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel. And I thought I was lazy
gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've
 ever done?
 I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the
 wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS)
 walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person;
 he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a
 bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just
 barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship
 and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes puttinga
 big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face.
 He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how
 to be alive for today. It's painful to watch.
 But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the
 phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known
 I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could
 you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts
 the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting.
 And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of
 sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall
 behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks
 slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just
 witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to
 adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees,
 he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of
 his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel
 and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his
 eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe.
 He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at
 the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may
 never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's
 not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next
 bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin,
 before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel.
And I thought I was lazy

And I thought I was lazy

gnaw: jesterdraws: goretober day 5: amputation sometimes you gotta gnaw your own leg off to escape
gnaw: jesterdraws:

goretober day 5: amputation
sometimes you gotta gnaw your own leg off to escape

jesterdraws: goretober day 5: amputation sometimes you gotta gnaw your own leg off to escape

gnaw: 2 3 E MOTIONS PEOPLE FEEL, BUT CAN'T EXPLAIN tai Orcza 1. Sonder The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as your own 2. Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable 3. Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place. 4. Enouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self 5. Vee chor The strange wistfulness of used bookshops 6. Rubatosis: The unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat 7. Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet 8. Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like 9. Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head. 10 Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm 11 Vemodalen: The frustration of photographic something amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist 12. Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but nobody is listening 13 Ellipsism: A sadness that you never be able to know how history will turn out 14. Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless violence 15 Lachesism: The desire to be struck by disaster to survive a plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire 16 Exulansis: The tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it 17. Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know Someone 18. Ruckkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your awareness 19. Nodus Tollens: The realization that the plot of your life doesn't make sense to you anymore 20. Onism: The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time 21 Liberosis: The desire to care less about things 22 Altschmerz: Weariness with the same olc issues that you've always had the same boring flaws and anxieties that you've been gnawing on for years 23. Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your perspective the full set, which is extremely relatable @yourtypicalgiggle
gnaw: 2 3 E MOTIONS PEOPLE FEEL, BUT CAN'T EXPLAIN
 tai Orcza
 1. Sonder
 The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid
 and complex as your own
 2. Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye,
 which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable
 3. Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of
 place.
 4. Enouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the
 future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell
 your past self
 5. Vee
 chor
 The strange wistfulness of used bookshops
 6. Rubatosis: The unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat
 7. Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is
 usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet
 8. Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people
 away, even close friends who you really like
 9. Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play
 out in your head.
 10
 Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a
 thunderstorm
 11
 Vemodalen: The frustration of photographic something
 amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist
 12. Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but
 nobody is listening
 13
 Ellipsism: A sadness that you
 never be able to know how
 history will turn out
 14. Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless
 violence
 15
 Lachesism: The desire to be struck by disaster to survive a
 plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire
 16
 Exulansis: The tendency to give up trying to talk about an
 experience because people are unable to relate to it
 17. Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know
 Someone
 18. Ruckkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an
 immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your
 awareness
 19. Nodus Tollens: The realization that the plot of your life doesn't
 make sense to you anymore
 20. Onism: The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that
 inhabits only one place at a time
 21
 Liberosis: The desire to care less about things
 22
 Altschmerz: Weariness with the same olc issues that you've
 always had the same boring flaws and anxieties that you've
 been gnawing on for years
 23. Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your
 perspective
the full set, which is extremely relatable @yourtypicalgiggle

the full set, which is extremely relatable @yourtypicalgiggle

gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've ever done? I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS) walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person; he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship, and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face. He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how to be alive for today. It's painful to watch. But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting. And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees, he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe. He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin, before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel. Mention The Laziest Thing You’ve Ever Done
gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've
 ever done?
 I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the
 wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS)
 walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person;
 he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a
 bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just
 barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship,
 and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a
 big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face.
 He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how
 to be alive for today. It's painful to watch.
 But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the
 phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known
 I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could
 you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts
 the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting.
 And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of
 sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall
 behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks
 slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just
 witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to
 adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees,
 he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of
 his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel
 and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his
 eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe.
 He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at
 the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may
 never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's
 not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next
 bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin,
 before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel.
Mention The Laziest Thing You’ve Ever Done

Mention The Laziest Thing You’ve Ever Done

gnaw: 23 E MOTIONS PEOPLE FEEL, BUT CAN'T EXPLAIN tai-korczak 1. Sonder: he realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as you Own 2. Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable 3. Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place 4. Enouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self 5. Vellichor: The strange wistfulness of used bookshops 6. Rubatosis: he unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat 7. Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet 8. Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like 9. Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head 10. Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm 11. Vemodalen: The frustration of photographic something amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist 12. Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but nobody is listening 13. Ellipsism: A sadness that you never be able to know how history will turn out 14. Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless Violence 15 Lache sism: The desire to be struck by disaster to survive a plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire 16. Exulansis: he tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it 17. Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know Someone 18 Ruckkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your awareness 19. Nodus Tollens: he realization that the plot of your life doesn't make sense to you anymore 20. Onism: he frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time 21 Liberosis: The desire to care less about things 22. Altschmerz: Wear ness with the same old issues that you've always had the same boring flaws and anxieties that you've been gnawing on for years 23. Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your perspective Boredom: the desire for desires
gnaw: 23 E MOTIONS PEOPLE FEEL, BUT CAN'T EXPLAIN
 tai-korczak
 1. Sonder: he realization that each passerby has a life as vivid
 and complex as you
 Own
 2. Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye,
 which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable
 3. Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of
 place
 4. Enouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the
 future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell
 your past self
 5. Vellichor: The strange wistfulness of used bookshops
 6. Rubatosis: he unsettling awareness of your
 own heartbeat
 7. Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is
 usually bustling with
 people but is now abandoned and quiet
 8. Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people
 away, even close friends who you really like
 9. Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play
 out in your head
 10. Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a
 thunderstorm
 11. Vemodalen: The frustration of photographic something
 amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist
 12. Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but
 nobody is listening
 13. Ellipsism: A sadness that you
 never be able to
 know how
 history will turn out
 14. Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless
 Violence
 15
 Lache sism: The desire to be struck by disaster
 to survive a
 plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire
 16. Exulansis: he tendency to give up trying to talk about an
 experience because people are unable to relate to it
 17. Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know
 Someone
 18
 Ruckkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an
 immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your
 awareness
 19. Nodus Tollens: he realization that the plot of your life doesn't
 make sense to you anymore
 20. Onism: he frustration of
 being stuck in just one body, that
 inhabits only one place at a time
 21
 Liberosis: The desire to care less about things
 22. Altschmerz: Wear
 ness with the same old issues that you've
 always had the same boring flaws and anxieties that you've
 been gnawing on for years
 23. Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your
 perspective
Boredom: the desire for desires

Boredom: the desire for desires

gnaw: 750x1350. SWEETTERRIFYING CHRIST Jpg 12 53 No 6088875 s of Monke if this isn't really up to produce putting this hours ago, I was interrupted by a few episodes of Monk. u DM s an artsy type, but not in an interesting way He es er de m re than useful info ma n He s like the Talkienof s w eve of ba ered him about his st run in things Heli es makin Worl an en we start ou t in this shitty little town in his worlds analogue to dark age Germany s ray vet theres a lot of mu everyone is d poor all the peasants are insula around foreigner begin But learn that were actual on our way throu n our way to er a Rome o somethin on a m ssion to reco e some rtof artifact he sen us s us rations su es and hat he ca artha na hin 10/01/09(Thu)12 56 seriously maetimes bordering rowwhatitwas but chasing pass through some were supposed to be learning about, only that there was something Someth Pursuing Not us, but chasing something were supposed to be dragging moisture from the air back into the swamp as they emerged, dragging gone from the ground o their bodies Into closing wounds as they did. losing pallor and gla ed expression to take on the green vibrance of psychically drawing weapons to the ground and brackish throwing them directly from whence they came, and re-opened then wounds for them Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)1257 No 6088908 Paradox Euny sure that werdtoandbroke refused towan back. If he mook Just sat down and started went, and talking road through the s there내이 Ke pretty Sounds like pretty standard fare, doesnt it? Oh we thought so too really gotten us creepy Heheheheh at describing shit? thing I'd ever heard put into Words before. He described the most idyllic and wonderful place imaginable and surrounded by flowing wheat The people were long-braided and beautiful, with ample 109(Thu)12:58 were always er corner had women twirling slowlyon spot, dancing in the jo taking long steps we figured we'd stay around for a while, to check event the townsfolk, and we learn that the town is called KarTordek. I think this is a laugh of course, a promiscuous people whose religion revolves around how awesome strangers are one thing.the ofHis gloriousday heartbeat e start freakinrealize that the Day greets us this fucking place, somewhere in the Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)12 59 the damn rdsing placesthatnwithhumanbl il The people through. The primary crop Is grave heat hich only grows on ground watered with human blood Sounds ike a d crop to bep OH WAT YEAH. EVERYT s been doing for a while now, though we hadn't really given it much thought after the first 10/01/09(Thu)13 01 No have Thelistmastoduring There is a full ten seconds of silence. before he adds, they never did. He then begins to elaborate upon what else The end result, boneless, toothless. eyeless, with long rubbery limbs women had been long blackened tongues. Tongues. he said that we had grown rather accustomed to dum the nght and talking backwards Insteadofaererturnsaround ub up against and slivering and and taking our blows that grabbed0ucking killed the village out one goddamn ndominbuilding at a time, k king killed them all king killed them all. Every single one of them. We ling their lipless horrors and the ones that gnawed at our ankles and Jumped would throw themselves at ended the threat Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)13 The gravewheat. It mustveDr third session there It mustve been corrupting the people congratulated us on ed warningson sion,though,Tao much On the b one thing, but that stuff was ession, though, he 10/01/09(Thu)13 07 No 6089029 Then we came back. Not to the same campaign, nobody mentioned it again. The DM aracters and had us start out in the same little town we began in before informing us that it is fall lt broken legs. The emaciated, starved corpse of an elf with broken legs Clearly orc work. We proceed and get what to the single darkest moment in the entire history of my gaming 10/01/09(Thu)13 08 No 6089044 pentameter, gibbergsandtheassailantsybeaten defendth luny. The s torches nts, trapped in k, but we proceed th of pacifists, who hadclear animals weaponless and run through, monks rhyming rhythmic mated unnecessary, horrible nnecessneanderings to grapple the buildings The and the frothing babble of Like one long, grand verse, they were in iambic pentamer Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)13 38 No 6089317 outapieceaspaincredibly l players,Wain flame that he was saying. So when he at were lowering themselve thing imaginable He already destroyed us wit How is this not in the Hall of Fame already?
gnaw: 750x1350. SWEETTERRIFYING CHRIST Jpg
 12 53 No 6088875
 s of Monke if this isn't really up
 to produce
 putting this
 hours ago, I was interrupted by a few episodes of Monk.
 u DM s an artsy type, but not in an interesting way He es er de m re than useful info ma n He s like the Talkienof s w eve of ba ered him about his st run in things Heli es makin Worl an en
 we start ou t in this shitty little town in his worlds analogue to dark age Germany s ray vet theres a lot of mu everyone is d poor all the peasants are insula
 around foreigner
 begin But learn that were actual on our way throu n our way to er a Rome o somethin on a m ssion to reco e some rtof artifact he sen us s us rations su es and hat he ca artha na hin
 10/01/09(Thu)12 56
 seriously maetimes bordering rowwhatitwas but chasing
 pass through some
 were supposed to be learning about, only that there was something Someth
 Pursuing Not us, but chasing something
 were supposed to be
 dragging moisture from the air back into the swamp as they emerged, dragging gone from the ground
 o their bodies Into closing wounds as they did. losing pallor and gla ed expression to take on the green vibrance of
 psychically drawing weapons to the
 ground and brackish
 throwing them
 directly from whence they came, and re-opened then wounds for them
 Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)1257 No 6088908
 Paradox Euny sure that
 werdtoandbroke
 refused towan back. If he
 mook Just sat down and started went, and talking
 road through the s
 there내이 Ke pretty
 Sounds like pretty standard fare, doesnt it? Oh we thought so too
 really gotten us
 creepy Heheheheh
 at describing shit?
 thing I'd ever heard put into Words before. He described the most idyllic and wonderful place imaginable
 and surrounded by flowing wheat The people
 were long-braided and beautiful, with ample
 109(Thu)12:58
 were always er corner had women twirling slowlyon
 spot, dancing in the jo
 taking long steps
 we figured we'd stay around for a while, to check event
 the townsfolk, and we learn that the town is called KarTordek. I think this is a laugh
 of course, a promiscuous people whose religion revolves around how awesome strangers are
 one thing.the ofHis gloriousday heartbeat
 e start freakinrealize that the Day greets us
 this fucking place, somewhere in the
 Anonymous
 10/01/09(Thu)12 59
 the damn rdsing placesthatnwithhumanbl il The people
 through.
 The primary crop Is grave heat hich only grows on ground watered with human blood Sounds ike a d crop to bep OH WAT YEAH.
 EVERYT
 s been doing for a while now, though we hadn't really given it much thought after the first
 10/01/09(Thu)13 01 No
 have Thelistmastoduring
 There is a full ten seconds of silence. before he adds, they never did. He then begins to elaborate upon what else
 The end result, boneless, toothless. eyeless, with long rubbery limbs
 women had been long blackened tongues. Tongues. he said that we had grown rather accustomed to dum the nght
 and talking backwards Insteadofaererturnsaround
 ub up against
 and slivering and
 and taking our blows
 that grabbed0ucking killed the
 village out one goddamn
 ndominbuilding at a time, k
 king killed them all
 king killed them all. Every single one of them. We
 ling their lipless horrors and the
 ones that gnawed at our ankles and Jumped
 would throw themselves at
 ended the threat
 Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)13
 The gravewheat. It mustveDr third session there
 It mustve been corrupting the people congratulated us on
 ed warningson sion,though,Tao much
 On the b
 one thing, but that stuff was ession, though, he
 10/01/09(Thu)13 07 No 6089029
 Then we came back. Not to the same campaign, nobody mentioned it again. The DM
 aracters and had us start out in the same little town we began in before
 informing us that it is fall lt
 broken legs. The emaciated, starved corpse of an elf with broken legs Clearly orc work. We proceed and get what
 to the single darkest moment in the entire history of my gaming
 10/01/09(Thu)13 08 No 6089044
 pentameter, gibbergsandtheassailantsybeaten defendth luny. The s
 torches nts, trapped in
 k, but we proceed th
 of pacifists, who hadclear animals weaponless
 and run through, monks
 rhyming rhythmic mated unnecessary, horrible
 nnecessneanderings
 to grapple
 the buildings The
 and the frothing babble of
 Like one long, grand verse, they were
 in iambic pentamer
 Anonymous 10/01/09(Thu)13 38 No 6089317
 outapieceaspaincredibly l
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How is this not in the Hall of Fame already?

How is this not in the Hall of Fame already?

gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've ever done? I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS) walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person; he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship, and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face. He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how to be alive for today. It's painful to watch. But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting. And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees, he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe. He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin, before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel. Über Humor 'm afraid I just blue myself. Lazy Navy Officerhttp://meme-rage.tumblr.com
gnaw: What is the laziest thing you've
 ever done?
 I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the
 wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS)
 walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person;
 he's still half asleep, bleary eyed... basically a zombie with a
 bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just
 barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship,
 and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a
 big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face.
 He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how
 to be alive for today. It's painful to watch.
 But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the
 phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known
 I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could
 you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts
 the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting.
 And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of
 sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall
 behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks
 slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just
 witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to
 adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees,
 he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of
 his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel
 and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his
 eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe.
 He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at
 the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may
 never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's
 not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next
 bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin,
 before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel.
 Über Humor 'm afraid I just blue myself.
Lazy Navy Officerhttp://meme-rage.tumblr.com

Lazy Navy Officerhttp://meme-rage.tumblr.com