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🔥 | Latest

Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED of only they taught beauty class like this Best description of sugar scrub ever.
Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders
 ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN
 SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR
 NOTEPAD
 THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW
 YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I
 KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE
 FUCKERS
 YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT
 YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN
 THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM
 TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A
 NEWBORN
 sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND
 SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND
 MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART
 OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL
 BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO
 SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL
 THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR
 MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU
 WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM
 SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
 NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED
 PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE
 BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND
 SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS
 VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE
 NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND
 SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A
 HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER
 THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near
 your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really
 important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way
 its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR
 HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS
 WORKING
 NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU
 HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN
 EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN
 BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF
 BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
 GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT
 WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF
 YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS
 CLASS DISMISSED
 of only they taught beauty class like this
Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Fire, Life, and Rey: FPS Players: This HUD sucks. It blocks my view. MMO Players: Group 3 Lasttegame eurrs Trial of the Crusader Peariswallow M6pd Presgnce Concentrationura Devotion Aura Ebon Champion Fel Intelligence V Fire Resistance VI Fire Resistance Aura V Herofc nce Lender of the Pae n prng Vill Moonin Aura Retribution Aura Vi Stonestn Strength of Earth VII Totem ofrath Tree of Life Windfury Totem Wrath of Air Totem Gift of the Wild IV lask of Lndiless Rage 56:33 Prayer of Spint Ill Prayer of fortitude IV 55:4S Well F Greate ther Portal CD Greate Infernal Eruptidn CD aresali 80 20 39977/39977 100% 85/100 as 18.0M/20.2M 89 % 4258/4258 25791/25791 100 % 00% 29% Bos 28/130 28 Demon ADility is not readly yet. Ability is rioteady yet. Abjlity is not ready ye Apackanu 80 rey 899 FO53 30791/30791 100 % 63 63/100 (Killing Machine) Frost Presence ready!] 898 919 27157/27157 100 % 26/100 58:05 26 55 44 Peariswauow 46.0 Jemantng I:50 Zi Chtir ef Pet 208 creates a Nether Potal 23650/23650 100% The Apocaleir T:16 19824/24786 79 % Lord Jaraxxus Legion Flame CD 10.7 4Z0306biterate) 2721 (4dor fretit02 resisted) 4617(Frost Strike) (379 resiste 2730(Frost Strike) resisted)ook t985lawTh Ret 498 174(Clancing) Pet 4433 Pet 484 Miss (292) n3 bi9:31 508 SO26784/26784 100% 1/100 Mky Cham r he Dead Gheula atsMinlne e of tre Nap anuse Co Biiu 31 Graup 4 Graup 5 DayeooX SaaditlusX 171.6k [100 %] 5715 Lroo A738 100% 00 100 o0s atrpt aly [78 % ) 1[75 % ) 12U.170 % 118.4k [68 % 109.7k [63%] 56.5k 132 %] Slayerckmy Antema v Corvan Omue kyu 7 00% o0% Auroralaity Lanierzlok 7Ftost. (2 100% 100 ou, 2 5560 Zhulllan Bravex ha ne T00 100% 100% 100% 100% Apackanuts 3606 MorionaX Redingle Fx. 2524 Anthlimas Rithum Lod llostthegame Viale Zor Frost) (I resisted) 89 100 OOR o0% o0 Kraydos 8hetanxstthouettes T00% for 306 Edas DPS Kdeptüla 1.Apackanuts 00% 1op% o0% op To0 laraxxus 89 Tor 216 Physical. 02 Army of the Dead Ghoul's melee swing hits Lord Jaraxxus for 208 Physical. 10881.1 TO0% 100 18033791/20220250] 125791/257911 2 Brayex 7256.2 424258 3. Mkyu 7051.2 4. Corvan 6853.1 Lord Jaraxxus 2 Demon Paladin Comba Boss 10 6131.8 5. Vlaie 19:01 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used 19:02 <Lord Jaraxxus Legion Flame on Omile 19:02] <Lord Jaraxxus Nether Power on Jaraxxus! Dispel Now! 19:021 Shoxane hes Incinerate Flesh! Heal her! 119:02| Lard Jaraxxus yells: FLESH FROM BONE! 19:02 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used 19:02 Lord Jaraxxus creates a Nether Portal! 19:02 Lard Jaraxxus yells: Come forth, sister! Your master calls! 19:02 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used 6. Sihouettes 7. Ulostthegame 5919.2 57S7.0 8. Slayerckm 5569.2 Pearlswallow 100% 9. Aurorafaith 5069.2 10. Davcook 4621.8 Deathweave Bag (F9) sno Soulbound 12 Slot Bag ItemLevel: 35 pulli OGM MOA TRIF... 4 56 MOunt (8) I miss Dead Space
Fire, Life, and Rey: FPS Players: This HUD sucks. It blocks my view.
 MMO Players:
 Group 3
 Lasttegame
 eurrs
 Trial of the Crusader
 Peariswallow
 M6pd Presgnce
 Concentrationura
 Devotion Aura
 Ebon Champion
 Fel Intelligence V
 Fire Resistance VI
 Fire Resistance Aura V
 Herofc nce
 Lender of the Pae
 n prng Vill
 Moonin Aura
 Retribution Aura Vi
 Stonestn
 Strength of Earth VII
 Totem ofrath
 Tree of Life
 Windfury Totem
 Wrath of Air Totem
 Gift of the Wild IV
 lask of Lndiless Rage 56:33
 Prayer of Spint Ill
 Prayer of fortitude IV 55:4S
 Well F
 Greate ther Portal CD
 Greate Infernal Eruptidn CD
 aresali
 80
 20 39977/39977 100%
 85/100 as
 18.0M/20.2M 89 %
 4258/4258
 25791/25791 100 %
 00%
 29%
 Bos
 28/130
 28
 Demon
 ADility is not readly yet.
 Ability is rioteady yet.
 Abjlity is not ready ye
 Apackanu
 80
 rey
 899
 FO53
 30791/30791 100 %
 63
 63/100
 (Killing Machine)
 Frost Presence ready!]
 898
 919
 27157/27157 100 %
 26/100
 58:05
 26
 55 44
 Peariswauow
 46.0
 Jemantng
 I:50
 Zi Chtir ef
 Pet 208
 creates a Nether Potal
 23650/23650 100%
 The Apocaleir
 T:16
 19824/24786 79 %
 Lord Jaraxxus
 Legion Flame CD
 10.7
 4Z0306biterate)
 2721 (4dor fretit02 resisted)
 4617(Frost Strike) (379 resiste
 2730(Frost Strike) resisted)ook
 t985lawTh
 Ret 498 174(Clancing)
 Pet 4433
 Pet 484
 Miss (292) n3
 bi9:31
 508
 SO26784/26784 100%
 1/100
 Mky Cham
 r he Dead Gheula
 atsMinlne
 e of tre Nap anuse
 Co Biiu
 31
 Graup 4
 Graup 5
 DayeooX
 SaaditlusX
 171.6k [100 %]
 5715
 Lroo
 A738
 100%
 00
 100
 o0s
 atrpt
 aly
 [78 % )
 1[75 % )
 12U.170 %
 118.4k [68 %
 109.7k [63%]
 56.5k 132 %]
 Slayerckmy
 Antema v
 Corvan
 Omue
 kyu
 7
 00% o0%
 Auroralaity Lanierzlok 7Ftost. (2
 100%
 100
 ou, 2
 5560
 Zhulllan
 Bravex
 ha ne
 T00 100%
 100%
 100%
 100%
 Apackanuts
 3606
 MorionaX Redingle
 Fx.
 2524
 Anthlimas
 Rithum Lod
 llostthegame
 Viale
 Zor Frost) (I resisted)
 89 100 OOR o0% o0
 Kraydos 8hetanxstthouettes
 T00%
 for 306
 Edas
 DPS
 Kdeptüla
 1.Apackanuts
 00% 1op% o0% op To0 laraxxus 89
 Tor 216 Physical.
 02 Army of the Dead Ghoul's melee swing hits Lord Jaraxxus
 for 208 Physical.
 10881.1
 TO0%
 100
 18033791/20220250] 125791/257911
 2 Brayex
 7256.2
 424258
 3. Mkyu
 7051.2
 4. Corvan
 6853.1
 Lord Jaraxxus
 2 Demon Paladin Comba Boss
 10
 6131.8
 5. Vlaie
 19:01 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used
 19:02 <Lord Jaraxxus Legion Flame on Omile
 19:02] <Lord Jaraxxus Nether Power on Jaraxxus! Dispel Now!
 19:021 Shoxane hes Incinerate Flesh! Heal her!
 119:02| Lard Jaraxxus yells: FLESH FROM BONE!
 19:02 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used
 19:02 Lord Jaraxxus creates a Nether Portal!
 19:02 Lard Jaraxxus yells: Come forth, sister! Your master calls!
 19:02 Kdeptula:80] says: interrupt used
 6. Sihouettes
 7. Ulostthegame
 5919.2
 57S7.0
 8. Slayerckm
 5569.2
 Pearlswallow
 100%
 9. Aurorafaith
 5069.2
 10. Davcook
 4621.8
 Deathweave Bag (F9)
 sno
 Soulbound
 12 Slot Bag
 ItemLevel: 35
 pulli OGM MOA TRIF...
 4
 56
 MOunt
 (8)
I miss Dead Space

I miss Dead Space

Energy, Money, and Skinny: Good old days... MEN WOULDN'T LOOK AT ME WHENI WAS SKINNY but... Since I Gained 10 Pounds This New, Easy Way I Have All the Dates I Want NOW there's no necd t ain an ounce before. Here's a new, easy treatment that is giving thousands attractive flesh-in just a few weceks! u wwith this new veast discovery in little tablets, you can get far greater tonle re- sults-regain health, and also put on pounds of firm Not only are thousands quickly gaining beauty- bringing pounds, but also elear skin, freedom from indigestion and constipation, new pep. Concentrated 7 times amazing new product, Ironized Yeast, is This made from specially cultured brewers ale yeast imported from Europe-the richest yeast known whieh ro ulcentrated 7 times But that is not all! This super-rich yeast is iron- ized with 3 speclal kinds of iron which strengthen the blood, add energy. u take Ironized Yeast tab- lets. watch Bat chest develop, skinny limbs round out attractively. Skin clears to beauty, new health comes-you're an entirely new person. Results guaranteed No matter how skinny and weak you may be, or how long you have been that way, this marvelous hort weeks as it has thousands. It you are not delighted with the results of the very first pack age, your money will be instantly refunded. Special FREE offer! To start you building up your health right away, we make this absolutely FREE offer. Purchase a h s on the hox and mail it to us with a clin ping of this paragraph. We will send you a fasci- Redy well-known authority. Remember, re- sults are guaranteed with the very first package- OT money 98Atianta, Co Ironized Yeast Co., Inc., Dept. Pd y prafeeimalodel THE META PICTURE srsfunny: Things Were So Different Back Then
Energy, Money, and Skinny: Good old days...
 MEN
 WOULDN'T
 LOOK AT ME
 WHENI WAS
 SKINNY
 but...
 Since I Gained 10 Pounds
 This New, Easy Way
 I Have All the Dates I Want
 NOW there's no necd t
 ain an ounce
 before. Here's a new, easy treatment that is giving
 thousands attractive flesh-in just a few weceks!
 u wwith this new veast discovery
 in little tablets, you can get far greater tonle re-
 sults-regain health, and also put on pounds of firm
 Not only are thousands quickly gaining beauty-
 bringing pounds, but also elear skin, freedom
 from indigestion and constipation, new pep.
 Concentrated 7 times
 amazing new product, Ironized Yeast, is
 This
 made from specially cultured brewers ale yeast
 imported from Europe-the richest yeast known
 whieh ro ulcentrated 7 times
 But that is not all! This super-rich yeast is iron-
 ized with 3 speclal kinds of iron which strengthen
 the blood, add energy.
 u take Ironized Yeast tab-
 lets. watch Bat chest develop, skinny limbs round
 out attractively. Skin clears to beauty, new health
 comes-you're an entirely new person.
 Results guaranteed
 No matter how skinny and weak you may be, or
 how long you have been that way, this marvelous
 hort weeks as it has thousands. It you are not
 delighted with the results of the very first pack
 age, your money will be instantly refunded.
 Special FREE offer!
 To start you building up your health right away,
 we make this absolutely FREE offer. Purchase a
 h s on the hox and mail it to us with a clin
 ping of this paragraph. We will send you a fasci-
 Redy well-known authority. Remember, re-
 sults are guaranteed with the very first package-
 OT money 98Atianta, Co Ironized Yeast
 Co., Inc., Dept.
 Pd y prafeeimalodel
 THE META PICTURE
srsfunny:

Things Were So Different Back Then

srsfunny: Things Were So Different Back Then

Energy, Money, and Skinny: Good old days... MEN WOULDN'T LOOK AT ME WHENI WAS SKINNY but... Since I Gained 10 Pounds This New, Easy Way I Have All the Dates I Want NOW there's no necd t ain an ounce before. Here's a new, easy treatment that is giving thousands attractive flesh-in just a few weceks! u wwith this new veast discovery in little tablets, you can get far greater tonle re- sults-regain health, and also put on pounds of firm Not only are thousands quickly gaining beauty- bringing pounds, but also elear skin, freedom from indigestion and constipation, new pep. Concentrated 7 times amazing new product, Ironized Yeast, is This made from specially cultured brewers ale yeast imported from Europe-the richest yeast known whieh ro ulcentrated 7 times But that is not all! This super-rich yeast is iron- ized with 3 speclal kinds of iron which strengthen the blood, add energy. u take Ironized Yeast tab- lets. watch Bat chest develop, skinny limbs round out attractively. Skin clears to beauty, new health comes-you're an entirely new person. Results guaranteed No matter how skinny and weak you may be, or how long you have been that way, this marvelous hort weeks as it has thousands. It you are not delighted with the results of the very first pack age, your money will be instantly refunded. Special FREE offer! To start you building up your health right away, we make this absolutely FREE offer. Purchase a h s on the hox and mail it to us with a clin ping of this paragraph. We will send you a fasci- Redy well-known authority. Remember, re- sults are guaranteed with the very first package- OT money 98Atianta, Co Ironized Yeast Co., Inc., Dept. Pd y prafeeimalodel THE META PICTURE srsfunny:Things Were So Different Back Then
Energy, Money, and Skinny: Good old days...
 MEN
 WOULDN'T
 LOOK AT ME
 WHENI WAS
 SKINNY
 but...
 Since I Gained 10 Pounds
 This New, Easy Way
 I Have All the Dates I Want
 NOW there's no necd t
 ain an ounce
 before. Here's a new, easy treatment that is giving
 thousands attractive flesh-in just a few weceks!
 u wwith this new veast discovery
 in little tablets, you can get far greater tonle re-
 sults-regain health, and also put on pounds of firm
 Not only are thousands quickly gaining beauty-
 bringing pounds, but also elear skin, freedom
 from indigestion and constipation, new pep.
 Concentrated 7 times
 amazing new product, Ironized Yeast, is
 This
 made from specially cultured brewers ale yeast
 imported from Europe-the richest yeast known
 whieh ro ulcentrated 7 times
 But that is not all! This super-rich yeast is iron-
 ized with 3 speclal kinds of iron which strengthen
 the blood, add energy.
 u take Ironized Yeast tab-
 lets. watch Bat chest develop, skinny limbs round
 out attractively. Skin clears to beauty, new health
 comes-you're an entirely new person.
 Results guaranteed
 No matter how skinny and weak you may be, or
 how long you have been that way, this marvelous
 hort weeks as it has thousands. It you are not
 delighted with the results of the very first pack
 age, your money will be instantly refunded.
 Special FREE offer!
 To start you building up your health right away,
 we make this absolutely FREE offer. Purchase a
 h s on the hox and mail it to us with a clin
 ping of this paragraph. We will send you a fasci-
 Redy well-known authority. Remember, re-
 sults are guaranteed with the very first package-
 OT money 98Atianta, Co Ironized Yeast
 Co., Inc., Dept.
 Pd y prafeeimalodel
 THE META PICTURE
srsfunny:Things Were So Different Back Then

srsfunny:Things Were So Different Back Then

Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again… I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything… We’ve been here before. It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe.
Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die

they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again…


I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything…
We’ve been here before.
It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe.

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