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fake: Real fake doors
fake: Real fake doors

Real fake doors

fake: I don’t even care if this is fake news. It’s what the world needs
fake: I don’t even care if this is fake news. It’s what the world needs

I don’t even care if this is fake news. It’s what the world needs

fake: I am fake too (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)
fake: I am fake too (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)

I am fake too (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)

fake: Cashier at the market thought I was paying with fake money. She had to call the manager over. Turns out this note was printed 6 years before she was born.
fake: Cashier at the market thought I was paying with fake money. She had to call the manager over. Turns out this note was printed 6 years before she was born.

Cashier at the market thought I was paying with fake money. She had to call the manager over. Turns out this note was printed 6 years bef...

fake: To el fake, ¿no?
fake: To el fake, ¿no?

To el fake, ¿no?

fake: Finally not fake news
fake: Finally not fake news

Finally not fake news

fake: I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.
fake: I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.

I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.

fake: iT’S FaKe BeCauSe eVeRyoNe CaN eDiT iT by ourredheads MORE MEMES
fake: iT’S FaKe BeCauSe eVeRyoNe CaN eDiT iT by ourredheads
MORE MEMES

iT’S FaKe BeCauSe eVeRyoNe CaN eDiT iT by ourredheads MORE MEMES

fake: I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.
fake: I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.

I like to design fake products, meet me newest creation. The Selfie Sandals.

fake: twitblr: My favorite part of the day is waking up and seeing the high school drop outs post about corona being fake news
fake: twitblr:

My favorite part of the day is waking up and seeing the high school drop outs post about corona being fake news

twitblr: My favorite part of the day is waking up and seeing the high school drop outs post about corona being fake news

fake: ¿Posible fake?
fake: ¿Posible fake?

¿Posible fake?

fake: It’s in a game so it can’t be fake
fake: It’s in a game so it can’t be fake

It’s in a game so it can’t be fake

fake: Don’t know if this is fake I found it on IG
fake: Don’t know if this is fake I found it on IG

Don’t know if this is fake I found it on IG

fake: Must have been a fake Louis
fake: Must have been a fake Louis

Must have been a fake Louis

fake: sushinfood: justamerplwithabox: vivelafat: prokopetz: officialdeadparrot: grellholmes: elsajeni: gunslingerannie: justtkeepcalmm: dean-and-his-pie: fororchestra: musicalmelody: Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it”  Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect.  To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha. On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious. I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair… Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair. The lengths we go for music. Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek. One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.” And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is: [stifled giggling] [reeeeeeally deep breath] [COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE] The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture. In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.” FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part. This is the best band post  Everyone else go home Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until, that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that Who does that? This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose. Julius IdontgivaFucik More like Julius Fuckit Pyrozod’s tags for this were too hilarious not to share
fake: sushinfood:

justamerplwithabox:

vivelafat:

prokopetz:

officialdeadparrot:

grellholmes:

elsajeni:

gunslingerannie:

justtkeepcalmm:

dean-and-his-pie:

fororchestra:

musicalmelody:

Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it” 
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect. 

To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.
On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.

I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…

Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.

Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.

One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[stifled giggling]
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.

This is the best band post 
Everyone else go home

Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this

which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,

that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that

Who does that?

This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.

Julius IdontgivaFucik

More like Julius Fuckit


Pyrozod’s tags for this were too hilarious not to share

sushinfood: justamerplwithabox: vivelafat: prokopetz: officialdeadparrot: grellholmes: elsajeni: gunslingerannie: justtkeepcalmm:...

fake: catbountry: d3dans: tinydancingmarionetteman:
fake: catbountry:
d3dans:

tinydancingmarionetteman:

catbountry: d3dans: tinydancingmarionetteman:

fake: Fake accounts are fun
fake: Fake accounts are fun

Fake accounts are fun

fake: meara-eldestofthemall: girlactionfigure: Eugene Lazowski was a Polish doctor who saved thousands of Jews during the Holocaust by creating a fake epidemic that kept the Germans away from their town. Eugene received his medical degree before the war started. After Germany invaded Poland in 1939, he became a military doctor with the Polish resistance. He was imprisoned in a German POW camp for his anti-Nazi activities. After his release in 1942, Eugene moved to a small town, Rozwadow, with his wife and young daughter. There he reunited with a friend from medical school, Stanislaw Matulewicz.Stanislaw made a medical discovery that seemed minor but proved monumental. He found that healthy people could be injected with a typhoid vaccine that would make them test positive for the deadly disease without actually contracting it.Eugene hatched a brilliant plan. He knew that Germans tended to be germaphobes and were terrified of typhus, a contagious bacterial disease. When a Polish town was found to be infected with typhus, the German occupiers would quarantine the entire area. Eugene also knew that by implementing his plan, he risked the death penalty, which applied to Poles who helped Jews. Undeterred by the risk, Eugene injected thousands of people with typhus and sent blood samples to the Germans to report the “epidemic.” He made sure to inject non-Jews as well as Jews, so the Nazis wouldn’t just come in and massacre all the Jews in town. Because it appeared to be a widespread epidemic, the Nazis stayed clear of Rozwadow. By late 1943, the Gestapo was suspicious. The entire town was supposedly infested with typhus, yet nobody was dying. Eugene learned a German medical team was being sent to the quarantined area. He frantically approached the oldest and sickest-looking people in town and asked them to wait in a squalid shack. When the visitors arrived, the villagers welcomed them with a party - featuring large quantities of vodka. After the celebration, the German doctors were taken to the “patients.” Eugene said, “I told them to be my guest and examine the patients, but to be careful because the Polish are dirty and full of lice, which transfer typhus.”The doctors quickly took blood samples without conducting full examinations of the patients. When the samples tested positive for typhus, the German health authorities were satisfied the epidemic was still raging. They never came back.After the war, Eugene didn’t tell anybody of his heroic acts, not even his wife. It wasn’t until a documentary was produced in 2000 about the fake epidemic that Eugene received the accolades he deserved. He passed away in 2006 at age 92.For risking his his life to save the Jews of Rozwadow, Poland, we honor Dr. Eugene Lazowski as this week’s Thursday Hero. Accidental Talmudist It’s important to remember that not all heroes wear tights and a cape.
fake: meara-eldestofthemall:

girlactionfigure:

Eugene Lazowski was a Polish doctor who saved thousands of Jews during the Holocaust by creating a fake epidemic that kept the Germans away from their town.
Eugene received his medical degree before the war started. After Germany invaded Poland in 1939, he became a military doctor with the Polish resistance. He was imprisoned in a German POW camp for his anti-Nazi activities. After his release in 1942, Eugene moved to a small town, Rozwadow, with his wife and young daughter. There he reunited with a friend from medical school, Stanislaw Matulewicz.Stanislaw made a medical discovery that seemed minor but proved monumental. He found that healthy people could be injected with a typhoid vaccine that would make them test positive for the deadly disease without actually contracting it.Eugene hatched a brilliant plan. He knew that Germans tended to be germaphobes and were terrified of typhus, a contagious bacterial disease. When a Polish town was found to be infected with typhus, the German occupiers would quarantine the entire area. Eugene also knew that by implementing his plan, he risked the death penalty, which applied to Poles who helped Jews. Undeterred by the risk, Eugene injected thousands of people with typhus and sent blood samples to the Germans to report the “epidemic.” He made sure to inject non-Jews as well as Jews, so the Nazis wouldn’t just come in and massacre all the Jews in town. Because it appeared to be a widespread epidemic, the Nazis stayed clear of Rozwadow. By late 1943, the Gestapo was suspicious. The entire town was supposedly infested with typhus, yet nobody was dying. Eugene learned a German medical team was being sent to the quarantined area. He frantically approached the oldest and sickest-looking people in town and asked them to wait in a squalid shack. When the visitors arrived, the villagers welcomed them with a party - featuring large quantities of vodka. After the celebration, the German doctors were taken to the “patients.” Eugene said, “I told them to be my guest and examine the patients, but to be careful because the Polish are dirty and full of lice, which transfer typhus.”The doctors quickly took blood samples without conducting full examinations of the patients. When the samples tested positive for typhus, the German health authorities were satisfied the epidemic was still raging. They never came back.After the war, Eugene didn’t tell anybody of his heroic acts, not even his wife. It wasn’t until a documentary was produced in 2000 about the fake epidemic that Eugene received the accolades he deserved. He passed away in 2006 at age 92.For risking his his life to save the Jews of Rozwadow, Poland, we honor Dr. Eugene Lazowski as this week’s Thursday Hero. Accidental Talmudist

It’s important to remember that not all heroes wear tights and a cape.

meara-eldestofthemall: girlactionfigure: Eugene Lazowski was a Polish doctor who saved thousands of Jews during the Holocaust by creati...

fake: My very elderly father has dementia & needs to start wearing depends, so I made a fake ad for “Disposable Sports Underwear” so he can use them without shame
fake: My very elderly father has dementia & needs to start wearing depends, so I made a fake ad for “Disposable Sports Underwear” so he can use them without shame

My very elderly father has dementia & needs to start wearing depends, so I made a fake ad for “Disposable Sports Underwear” so he can use...

fake: micspam: fiilme: i still cant believe they havent taken down the shirt i put it up there last friday im crying
fake: micspam:

fiilme:

i still cant believe they havent taken down the shirt i put it up there last friday im crying

micspam: fiilme: i still cant believe they havent taken down the shirt i put it up there last friday im crying

fake: Fake it til you make it by appreciatedeeznuts MORE MEMES
fake: Fake it til you make it by appreciatedeeznuts
MORE MEMES

Fake it til you make it by appreciatedeeznuts MORE MEMES

fake: awesomacious: Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>
fake: awesomacious:

Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>

awesomacious: Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>

fake: Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>
fake: Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>

Some are fake but if you find the right people >>>

fake: Because I legit feel bad when I fuck over the fake people in my fake world
fake: Because I legit feel bad when I fuck over the fake people in my fake world

Because I legit feel bad when I fuck over the fake people in my fake world

fake: ARA For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.
fake: ARA
For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.

For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.

fake: ARA For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.
fake: ARA
For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.

For fun I design fake product ideas, so I created a pair of mittens with a solo finger so you can still flip them off.