momentous
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comming
comming

comming

played
played

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saying
saying

saying

gagging
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atm
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🔥 | Latest

Being Alone, Baseball, and Cute: 6 at 10:22 PM- About 3 years ago I answered my phone and there was an elderly lady who said hello is this Johnny. I told her no it's not Johnny you must have the wrong number. She then proceeds to read my phone number back to me and I told her that the number she was calling could not be correct because it was my number. She then said she was sorry and hung up. She called again right after that. I told her no it's still me. She then would call me about once a week and I would have to tell her that she had the wrong number One time she called and I asked her how she was doing, she told me about her day, the noisy neighbors, her favorite TV show that she watched this afternoon and whatever else she wanted to tell me. She then asked me how my day was and I told her. She asked me how the kids were doing and I told talking to Johnny. I never told her I was Johnny but I never told her I wasn't. She would call about once every two weeks and the conversations usually went the same. When she asked about the kids I would tell her about mine She would talk about the last time she had seen them they were just little boys playing baseball in their cute uniforms. When I told her they were all grown up now she would remark that they grow up so fast. About six months ago I stopped getting phone calls. To be honest I really didn't think about it until I heard a commercial on the radio that sounded a lot like her. Then wondered what had happened to her. Well tonight when I got home from my men's meeting my phone rang and it was her. She told me that she had been ill and was in the hospital but she was much better now and home. She told me that they did not want her to come back home but she told them I've lived alone for 44 years I live alone just fine for the rest of my years. She then told me about her day about the noisy neighbors and about her TV show. She then told me she had to go because it was her bedtime, but we will talk again soon. Well curiosity got the better of me andI decided to do a reverse look up to see if I could find anything out about my mystery lady. Well I found her, she lives in the city& is 108 years old. I also found out her name for the first time because I never asked. Her first name swhich coincidentally was my grandmother's name. Her Johnny passed away about 23 years ago. I got this phone number about 21 years ago. So she very well may have had that correct number. It may have just been reassigned to me. I am looking forward to my next phone call from my friend Saw this post on my uncles facebook, made my day. via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2QEBAi0
Being Alone, Baseball, and Cute: 6 at 10:22 PM-
 About 3 years ago I answered my phone and there was an elderly lady who
 said hello is this Johnny. I told her no it's not Johnny you must have the
 wrong number. She then proceeds to read my phone number back to me
 and I told her that the number she was calling could not be correct because
 it was my number. She then said she was sorry and hung up. She called
 again right after that. I told her no it's still me. She then would call me about
 once a week and I would have to tell her that she had the wrong number
 One time she called and I asked her how she was doing, she told me about
 her day, the noisy neighbors, her favorite TV show that she watched this
 afternoon and whatever else she wanted to tell me. She then asked me how
 my day was and I told her. She asked me how the kids were doing and I told
 talking to Johnny. I never told her I was Johnny but I never told her I wasn't.
 She would call about once every two weeks and the conversations usually
 went the same. When she asked about the kids I would tell her about mine
 She would talk about the last time she had seen them they were just little
 boys playing baseball in their cute uniforms. When I told her they were all
 grown up now she would remark that they grow up so fast. About six months
 ago I stopped getting phone calls. To be honest I really didn't think about it
 until I heard a commercial on the radio that sounded a lot like her. Then
 wondered what had happened to her. Well tonight when I got home from my
 men's meeting my phone rang and it was her. She told me that she had
 been ill and was in the hospital but she was much better now and home. She
 told me that they did not want her to come back home
 but she told them I've lived alone for 44 years I live alone just fine for the rest
 of my years. She then told me about her day about the noisy neighbors and
 about her TV show. She then told me she had to go because it was her
 bedtime, but we will talk again soon. Well curiosity got the better of me andI
 decided to do a reverse look up to see if I could find anything out about my
 mystery lady. Well I found her, she lives in the city& is 108 years old. I also
 found out her name for the first time because I never asked. Her first name
 swhich coincidentally was my grandmother's name. Her Johnny
 passed away about 23 years ago. I got this phone number about 21 years
 ago. So she very well may have had that correct number. It may have just
 been reassigned to me. I am looking forward to my next phone call from my
 friend
Saw this post on my uncles facebook, made my day. via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2QEBAi0

Saw this post on my uncles facebook, made my day. via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2QEBAi0

Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL MUN ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME FOR A SECURITY GUARD ㄧㄋ EEENH! SORRY, HANS, WRONG GUESS. Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE? CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE REALLY BAD FOR You THEN WHO ARE You? [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS] WHEWE JUST A FLY IN THE OINTMENT, HANS. ER PSHUU THE MONKEY KLIK TTER WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY? WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU WANT THE MOON? JUST SAY THE WORD AND I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND T AND PULL IT DOWN HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY. I'LL TAKE IT. THEN WHAT, GEORGE? SNIFE WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE. AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR... AM I TALKING TOO MUCH? YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER, INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH? HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi). All characters (c) Marvel Comics. Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno. No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.) There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older, and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time. alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!
Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL
 MUN
 ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME
 FOR A SECURITY GUARD
 ㄧㄋ
 EEENH! SORRY, HANS,
 WRONG GUESS.
 Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR
 OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE
 SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE?

 CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE
 REALLY BAD FOR You
 THEN WHO ARE You?
 [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
 WHEWE
 JUST A FLY IN THE
 OINTMENT, HANS.
 ER

 PSHUU
 THE MONKEY
 KLIK
 TTER
 WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY?
 WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU
 WANT THE MOON?

 JUST SAY THE WORD AND
 I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND
 T AND PULL IT DOWN
 HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA.
 I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY.
 I'LL TAKE IT.
 THEN WHAT, GEORGE?
 SNIFE
 WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT
 AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE.
 AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT
 OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES
 AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR...
 AM I TALKING TOO MUCH?
 YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER,
 INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH?
 HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi).
 All characters (c) Marvel Comics.
 Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno.
 No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man
 Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.)
 There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older,
 and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical
 business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig
 up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from
 all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time.
alexdecampi:
Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe
Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore
Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta

HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!

alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low...

Beautiful, Beer, and Craigslist: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6 fflehoneubee.com To interested individuals, We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may stay the full duration of the party). Duties include: Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking beer Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to change. We will provide all of the meat) Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport" "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer) Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer. Desired experience: A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father A minimum of 10 years grilling experience An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold ones with the boys. THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are interested. Preference will be given to applicants named Bill, Randy, or Dave captainrogerss: asexual-not-asexual-detective: drunp: this is peak Craigslist Beautiful and wholesome Omg it really did happen tho 😭👏 https://www.distractify.com/humor/2018/06/05/ZnAVyw/craigslist-bbq-dad-ad
Beautiful, Beer, and Craigslist: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure
 for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6
 fflehoneubee.com
 To interested individuals,
 We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to
 celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from
 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a
 grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ
 Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic
 father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may
 stay the full duration of the party). Duties include:

 Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking
 beer
 Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to
 change. We will provide all of the meat)
 Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport"
 "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer)
 Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building
 your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes
 are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer.
 Desired experience:
 A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father
 A minimum of 10 years grilling experience
 An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer
 We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all
 the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a
 few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold
 ones with the boys.
 THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are
 interested. Preference will be given to applicants
 named Bill, Randy, or Dave
captainrogerss:


asexual-not-asexual-detective:


drunp:
this is peak Craigslist

Beautiful and wholesome


Omg it really did happen tho 😭👏
https://www.distractify.com/humor/2018/06/05/ZnAVyw/craigslist-bbq-dad-ad

captainrogerss: asexual-not-asexual-detective: drunp: this is peak Craigslist Beautiful and wholesome Omg it really did happen tho 😭👏...

Bad, Beard, and Comfortable: nOrma1-people-sxare-me A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was "he's got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he'd be more comfortable" and it made me realise the world isn't all that bad fitzefitcher #this is team skull its-just-a-phage The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying "You can pet me, but don't pick me up!" One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him "did you see the sign?" He said "yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don't pet them!" Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said "I didn't read it right did I?" And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said "its ok, i know you've got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits" And I still haven't gotten over that interaction. flowernstt I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He's a little thing tbh we call him short and long So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like "hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your's is so small I think it's a good place to start." Ofc I was like "yes he's very friendly!" So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks "canl pick him up?" And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two's lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes "hey man, it's okay just relax I'd never let anything hurt you. He'sa good boy." I'll never forget it ever bcI know that man looked at me (5'3, glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like 'ah ves the two least intimidating living things I've seen in Boston all day he'll feel relaxed around them and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy wholesome stories
Bad, Beard, and Comfortable: nOrma1-people-sxare-me
 A group of rough looking boys walked past me
 today and all I heard of their conversation was
 "he's got that anxiety disorder bro so I went
 with him so he'd be more comfortable" and it
 made me realise the world isn't all that bad
 fitzefitcher
 #this is team skull
 its-just-a-phage
 The pet store I worked at had a pen with
 rabbits near the front door. On every side of the
 pen were huge signs saying "You can pet me,
 but don't pick me up!"
 One day two absolutely huge guys came in and
 one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a
 rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend
 grabbed his arm and asked him "did you see
 the sign?"
 He said "yeah! it says that you can pick them
 up but don't pet them!"
 Then he went quiet for a moment and softly
 said "I didn't read it right did I?"
 And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder
 and said "its ok, i know you've got that thing
 where words get mixed up. Let just pet these
 cute lil shits"
 And I still haven't gotten over that interaction.
 flowernstt
 I was walking my dog through Boston bc he
 likes the likes car rides. He's a little thing tbh
 we call him short and long
 So this huge scary man with a full beard
 approaches me like "hey can my buddy and I
 pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs
 but your's is so small I think it's a good place to
 start."
 Ofc I was like "yes he's very friendly!" So this
 guy brings his equally big friend over and they
 sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of
 my tiny dog so big man number one asks "canl
 pick him up?" And i say yes so he picks him up
 and puts him on man number two's lap and
 man number two is abt to freak out and his
 friend straight up just goes "hey man, it's okay
 just relax I'd never let anything hurt you. He'sa
 good boy." I'll never forget it ever bcI know that
 man looked at me (5'3, glasses, probably
 wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda
 goofy looking little thing) and was like 'ah ves
 the two least intimidating living things I've seen
 in Boston all day he'll feel relaxed around them
 and went out of his way to help his friend. It
 makes me so happy
wholesome stories

wholesome stories