Eyes Open
Eyes Open

Eyes Open

Than
Than

Than

Keep
Keep

Keep

A Href
A Href

A Href

Have
Have

Have

Our
Our

Our

Was
Was

Was

Take
Take

Take

At Night
At Night

At Night

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From

From

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Animals, Bones, and Church: teaboot The amount of times I could have been that white girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie in itself and it's honestly a waste that my entire life isn't constantly recorded on film because it would be HILARIOUS teaboot 1. That one time I decided to see what was past the old gate in the woods, but when got there it had been smashed in half and there was a decapitated sheep head with no skin just off the trail, so instead I just turned around and went home. 2. That time some friends and I went camping and we found a pile of bones wrapped in a garbage bag buried under a log, but the adult supervisor told us it was nothing, so we just put it back and didn't talk about it again. 3. The time I was getting chased through the woods at night and I realized "wait it's dark as fuck so I just held still until the guy gave up and left. . The time this dude said he was in love with me and so he was going to cut my head off and dump my body in a lake, so l told him to grow the hell up, but then he got caught stealing girl's underwear a day later andI never saw him again 5. That one time in college where I was taking a shortcut on my home at night and a car followed me into a dark alley, so I stared directly into the driver's side of the window and walked towards it to psych them out 6. The night I was out on a walk and this old guy told me he'd locked his keys in his truck and that he needed someone my size to crawl in through the back window for him, so I told him you know that sounds super suspicious right and told him where to find a pay phone for a tow truck instead 7. The one time this random guy on the street said he was in love with me and so he was going to follow me home on my bus, so l clapped him on the shoulder and told him that if he got that close to my bus then I was going to throw him under the wheels, but then this really nice homeless man from Nigeria told the guy to fuck off and then checked to make sure he didn't follow me onboard 8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found in a well and brought home who used to put rotting meat in my closet and wake me up by chewing on my face, until I put him back outside and never saw him again. 9. My one cousin who used to come over for the summer who kept calling me 'piñata and hitting me with sticks, until he went back home and was sent to juvie c got caught torturing animals cause he finally 10. The time I got lost on the way to a meeting and wound up at a circus tent instead, and got followed by a full-out clown for three vacant street blocks 11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven who would scream all night and eventually es- caped by ripping a bar out of its cage and wig- gling through the hole. My mom caught it and put it back but it lved another year and a half until one night the screaming just stopped 12. The time I was whistling in the woods and something started whistling back, so I went home 13. That one night at summer camp where a group of girls got together to play 'bloody mary in the lavatory and invited me to come with them so I said "no thanks" and stayed with the camp councillors and drank soup instead. 14. The old abandoned house I just moved into with the door that leads into a big empty room full of dirt and empty cooking pots that I just sort of... locked up forever and never gon ear 15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a coffee mug do a full 360° spin with nobody touching it, so I said 'that was neat' and never ate there again 16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven sitting on the crucifix on top of the old town church cause it was the most goth thing l'd ever seen, right? But then it swooped down towards me, so I apologized immediately for being rude, and I felt a little silly for a while but the car that hit me on the way home didn't even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds teaboot Sorry I know I bring this shit up a lot but sometimes im awake at night and I just. keep thinking teaboot I think the secret to survival is to be good to animals, stay away from men, and say "no elsean Source: teaboot 205.063 notes Teaboots Adventures As That White Girl in Horror Movies
Animals, Bones, and Church: teaboot
 The amount of times I could have been that
 white girl in the horror movie could honestly
 be a movie in itself and it's honestly a waste
 that my entire life isn't constantly recorded on
 film because it would be HILARIOUS
 teaboot
 1. That one time I decided to see what was
 past the old gate in the woods, but when
 got there it had been smashed in half and
 there was a decapitated sheep head with no
 skin just off the trail, so instead I just turned
 around and went home.
 2. That time some friends and I went camping
 and we found a pile of bones wrapped in a
 garbage bag buried under a log, but the adult
 supervisor told us it was nothing, so we just
 put it back and didn't talk about it again.
 3. The time I was getting chased through
 the woods at night and I realized "wait it's
 dark as fuck so I just held still until the guy
 gave up and left.
 . The time this dude said he was in love with
 me and so he was going to cut my head off
 and dump my body in a lake, so l told him
 to grow the hell up, but then he got caught
 stealing girl's underwear a day later andI
 never saw him again
 5. That one time in college where I was
 taking a shortcut on my home at night and a
 car followed me into a dark alley, so I stared
 directly into the driver's side of the window
 and walked towards it to psych them out
 6. The night I was out on a walk and this old
 guy told me he'd locked his keys in his truck
 and that he needed someone my size to crawl
 in through the back window for him, so I told
 him you know that sounds super suspicious
 right and told him where to find a pay phone
 for a tow truck instead
 7. The one time this random guy on the street
 said he was in love with me and so he was
 going to follow me home on my bus, so l
 clapped him on the shoulder and told him that
 if he got that close to my bus then I was going
 to throw him under the wheels, but then this
 really nice homeless man from Nigeria told
 the guy to fuck off and then checked to make
 sure he didn't follow me onboard
 8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found
 in a well and brought home who used to put
 rotting meat in my closet and wake me up
 by chewing on my face, until I put him back
 outside and never saw him again.
 9. My one cousin who used to come over
 for the summer who kept calling me 'piñata
 and hitting me with sticks, until he went back
 home and was sent to juvie c
 got caught torturing animals
 cause he finally
 10. The time I got lost on the way to a
 meeting and wound up at a circus tent
 instead, and got followed by a full-out clown
 for three vacant street blocks
 11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven
 who would scream all night and eventually es-
 caped by ripping a bar out of its cage and wig-
 gling through the hole. My mom caught it and
 put it back but it lved another year and a half
 until one night the screaming just stopped
 12. The time I was whistling in the woods
 and something started whistling back,
 so I went home
 13. That one night at summer camp where
 a group of girls got together to play 'bloody
 mary in the lavatory and invited me to
 come with them so I said "no thanks" and
 stayed with the camp councillors and
 drank soup instead.
 14. The old abandoned house I just moved
 into with the door that leads into a big
 empty room full of dirt and empty cooking
 pots that I just sort of... locked up forever
 and never gon
 ear
 15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a
 coffee mug do a full 360° spin with nobody
 touching it, so I said 'that was neat' and
 never ate there again
 16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven
 sitting on the crucifix on top of the old town
 church cause it was the most goth thing l'd
 ever seen, right? But then it swooped down
 towards me, so I apologized immediately for
 being rude, and I felt a little silly for a while
 but the car that hit me on the way home didn't
 even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds
 teaboot
 Sorry I know I bring this shit up a lot but
 sometimes im awake at night and I just.
 keep thinking
 teaboot
 I think the secret to survival is to be good to
 animals, stay away from men, and say "no
 elsean
 Source: teaboot
 205.063 notes
Teaboots Adventures As That White Girl  in Horror Movies

Teaboots Adventures As That White Girl in Horror Movies

Animals, Bones, and Church: teaboot The amount of times I could have been that white girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie in itself and it's honestly a waste that my entire life isn't constantly recorded on film because it would be HILARIOUSS teaboot 1. That one time I decided to see what was past the old gate in the woods, but when got there it had beern smashed in half and there was a decapitated sheep head with no skin just off the trail, so instead I just turned around and went home 2. That time some friends and I went camping and we found a pile of bones wrapped in a garbage bag buried under a log, but the adult supervisor told us it was nothing, so we just put it back and didn't talk about it again. 3. The time I was getting chased through the woods at night and I realized "wait it's dark as fuck" so I just held still until the guy gave up and left. 4. The time this dude said he was in love with me and so he was going to cut my head off and dump my body in a lake, so I told him to grow the hell up, but then he got caught stealing girl's underwear a day later and I never saw him again 5. That one time in college where I was taking a short- cut on my home at night and a car followed me into a dark alley, so I stared directly into the drivers side of the window and walked towards it to psych them out 6. The night I was out on a walk and this old guy told me he'd locked his keys in his truck and that he needed someone my size to crawl in through the back window for him, so l told him "you know that sounds super suspicious right" and told him where to find a pay phone for a tow truck instead 7. The one time this random guy on the street said he was in love with me and so he was going to follow me home on my bus, so I clapped him on the shoulder and told him that if he got that close to my bus then l was going to throw him under the wheels, but then this really nice homeless man from Nigeria told the guy to fuck off and then checked to make sure he didn't follow me onboard 8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found in a wel and brought home who used to put rotting meat in my closet and wake me up by chewing on my face, until put him back outside and never saw him again. 9. My one cousin who used to come over for the summer who kept calling me piñata' and hitting me with sticks, until he went back home and was sent to juvie cause he finally got caught torturing animals 10. The time I got lost on the way to a meeting and wound up at a circus tent instead, and got followed by a full-out clown for three vacant street blocks 11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven who would scream all night and eventually escaped by ripping a bar out of its cage and wiggling through the hole. My mom caught it and put it back but it lived another year and a half until one night the screaming just stopped 12. The time I was whistling in the woods and something started whistling back, so I went home 13. That one night at summer camp where a group of girls got together to play bloody mary' in the lavatory and invited me to come with them so I said "no thanks" and stayed with the camp councillors and drank soup instead 14. The old abandoned house I just moved into witlh the door that leads into a big empty room full of dirt and empty cooking pots that I just sort of.. locked up forever and never go near 15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a coffee mug do a full 360° spin with nobody touching it, so I said that was neat' and never ate there again 16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven sitting on the crucifix on top of the old town church cause it was the most goth thing I'd ever seen, right? But then it swooped down towards me, so I apologized immediately for being rude, and I felt a little silly for a while but the car that hit me on the way home didn't even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds teaboot Sorry I know I bring this shit up a lot but sometimes inm awake at night and I just. keep thinking teaboot I think the secret to survival is to be good to animals, stay away from men, and say "no thanks" to everything else Source: teaboot 17,084 notes That One Time
Animals, Bones, and Church: teaboot
 The amount of times I could have been that white
 girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie
 in itself and it's honestly a waste that my entire life
 isn't constantly recorded on film because it would be
 HILARIOUSS
 teaboot
 1. That one time I decided to see what was past the
 old gate in the woods, but when got there it had beern
 smashed in half and there was a decapitated sheep
 head with no skin just off the trail, so instead I just
 turned around and went home
 2. That time some friends and I went camping and we
 found a pile of bones wrapped in a garbage bag buried
 under a log, but the adult supervisor told us it was
 nothing, so we just put it back and didn't talk about it
 again.
 3. The time I was getting chased through the woods
 at night and I realized "wait it's dark as fuck" so I just
 held still until the guy gave up and left.
 4. The time this dude said he was in love with me and
 so he was going to cut my head off and dump my
 body in a lake, so I told him to grow the hell up, but
 then he got caught stealing girl's underwear a day later
 and I never saw him again
 5. That one time in college where I was taking a short-
 cut on my home at night and a car followed me into a
 dark alley, so I stared directly into the drivers side of
 the window and walked towards it to psych them out
 6. The night I was out on a walk and this old guy
 told me he'd locked his keys in his truck and that he
 needed someone my size to crawl in through the back
 window for him, so l told him "you know that sounds
 super suspicious right" and told him where to find a
 pay phone for a tow truck instead
 7. The one time this random guy on the street said
 he was in love with me and so he was going to follow
 me home on my bus, so I clapped him on the shoulder
 and told him that if he got that close to my bus then l
 was going to throw him under the wheels, but then this
 really nice homeless man from Nigeria told the guy
 to fuck off and then checked to make sure he didn't
 follow me onboard
 8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found in a wel
 and brought home who used to put rotting meat in my
 closet and wake me up by chewing on my face, until
 put him back outside and never saw him again.
 9. My one cousin who used to come over for the
 summer who kept calling me piñata' and hitting me
 with sticks, until he went back home and was sent to
 juvie cause he finally got caught torturing animals
 10. The time I got lost on the way to a meeting and
 wound up at a circus tent instead, and got followed by
 a full-out clown for three vacant street blocks
 11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven who
 would scream all night and eventually escaped by
 ripping a bar out of its cage and wiggling through the
 hole. My mom caught it and put it back but it lived
 another year and a half until one night the screaming
 just stopped
 12. The time I was whistling in the woods and
 something started whistling back, so I went home
 13. That one night at summer camp where a group of
 girls got together to play bloody mary' in the lavatory
 and invited me to come with them so I said "no
 thanks" and stayed with the camp councillors and
 drank soup instead
 14. The old abandoned house I just moved into witlh
 the door that leads into a big empty room full of dirt
 and empty cooking pots that I just sort of.. locked up
 forever and never go near
 15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a coffee mug do
 a full 360° spin with nobody touching it, so I said that
 was neat' and never ate there again
 16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven sitting
 on the crucifix on top of the old town church cause
 it was the most goth thing I'd ever seen, right? But
 then it swooped down towards me, so I apologized
 immediately for being rude, and I felt a little silly for a
 while but the car that hit me on the way home didn't
 even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds
 teaboot
 Sorry I know I bring this shit up a lot but sometimes inm
 awake at night and I just. keep thinking
 teaboot
 I think the secret to survival is to be good to animals,
 stay away from men, and say "no thanks" to
 everything else
 Source: teaboot
 17,084 notes
That One Time

That One Time

Children, Life, and Love: WRITTEN BY: ZACH WEINERSMITH ART gY: ABBY HOWARC ACCORDING TO SOCIOLOGY, ABOUT 5X OF HUMAN BEINGS ARE SUPER WEIRD S THE HUMAN POPULATION GREW, THE ABSOLUTE QUANTITY OF SUPER WEIRD PEOPLE EXPANDED I'VE JUST <ALCULATEO A 73% STURDIER CRICkLAYIN PATTERN THAT WOULD ALS0 REQUIRE FEWER BRIck AVERAGE WEIRD THESE 6UYS BUS INESS LEADERS DISCovERED A SURPRISING SoON, RE 6ULAR PEOPLE WERE LESS ABLE TO FIND WOR K OPPORTUNITY.」ITS NOW POSSIBLE TO T SAYS HERE YOU HAVE 2S YEARS OF GUILD A FURNITURE FACILITY AND EXPE RIENCE AT ALL LEVELS OF ENGINE REPAIR, STAFF IT ENTIRELY WITH PEOPLE WHo EXPERIENCE BUT YouR PSYCH PROFILE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT AN EROTIC ATT RACTION TO UNPAID OVERTIME TRANSCENDENCE WHEN BUT MONITORING CHAIR PARTS I'M ORRY FOR DEFECTS! THE STRANGE PEOPLE WERE CLUSTERED BY TY PE SOMETIMES | LIE AWAKE AT NIGHT FANTASIZING ABOUT A MORE EFFICIENT CARD BOARD Box AND MORE AVERALE PEOPLE DIDN'T POSSESS THE RESOURCES TO HAVE CHILDREN I WISH I'D MARRIED A REAL MAN, WITH A PATHOLO6ICAL DESIRE To FIND MULTIPLE USES FOR LEFTOVER INDUSTRIAL ELULOSE.! ME I WONT DESIGN HAVE THI ARGUMENT A6AIN, I WONT RuLe AS THE BASELINE HUMAN BEING BECAME STRANGER, THE OUTLIERS BECAME EVER MORE USE FUL. IT SAYS HERE YoU HAVE EXPERIENCE IN PLUMBING, OUT NONE OF YOUR EXTREMITIES AKE SHAPED LIKE ALLEN WRENCHES BUT- I'M SORRY HUMANITY SPECIATED INTO ENDLESS FORMS MOST FUNCTIONAL- AUTOMOTIVE REPARIANS CHEMICAL ENGINESE COMPUTER PRObRAMMERFOLK TAP-A TAP-A TAP-A TAP-A WHEN THE TIME CAME TO MERGE WITH OUR TOOLS, THERE THERE ARE NO MACHINES. THERE 1S NO NATURE WAS NO HUMANITY LEFT IN US TO OPPoSE THE CHANGe. ONLY THE ORIVE TO EVER 6REATER HEIGHTS WE WANT TO PUT SOME ELECTRODES ON YOUR CEREBELLUM So YOU'RE NO LONGER ABLE TO STOP THINKING AB0UT INDUSTRIAL SOLVENTS OF PRODUCTIVITY My WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN LEADING UP To THiS MOMENT IT'5 BETTER THIS WAY.AN YoU IMAGINE WHAT IT WAS LIkE GEING ISTRACTED 8Y Love, HoPE, AND BEAUTY WHEN You REALLY NEEDED To Focus ON MAKING SMOOTHER BERYLLIUM SPHERES? WHAT A NI6HTMARE <p><a href="https://omg-images.tumblr.com/post/167391548432/saturday-morning-breakfast-cereal-specialization" class="tumblr_blog">omg-images</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Specialization</p></blockquote>
Children, Life, and Love: WRITTEN BY: ZACH WEINERSMITH
 ART gY: ABBY HOWARC
 ACCORDING TO SOCIOLOGY, ABOUT 5X OF HUMAN
 BEINGS ARE SUPER WEIRD
 S THE HUMAN POPULATION GREW, THE ABSOLUTE
 QUANTITY OF SUPER WEIRD PEOPLE EXPANDED
 I'VE JUST <ALCULATEO A 73%
 STURDIER CRICkLAYIN
 PATTERN THAT WOULD ALS0
 REQUIRE
 FEWER
 BRIck
 AVERAGE
 WEIRD THESE 6UYS
 BUS INESS LEADERS DISCovERED A SURPRISING SoON, RE 6ULAR PEOPLE WERE LESS ABLE TO FIND WOR K
 OPPORTUNITY.」ITS NOW POSSIBLE TO
 T SAYS HERE YOU HAVE 2S YEARS OF
 GUILD A FURNITURE FACILITY AND EXPE RIENCE AT ALL LEVELS OF ENGINE REPAIR,
 STAFF IT ENTIRELY WITH
 PEOPLE WHo EXPERIENCE
 BUT YouR PSYCH PROFILE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING
 ABOUT AN EROTIC ATT RACTION TO UNPAID
 OVERTIME
 TRANSCENDENCE WHEN
 BUT
 MONITORING CHAIR PARTS
 I'M
 ORRY
 FOR DEFECTS!
 THE STRANGE PEOPLE WERE CLUSTERED BY TY PE
 SOMETIMES | LIE AWAKE AT
 NIGHT FANTASIZING ABOUT
 A MORE EFFICIENT
 CARD BOARD Box
 AND MORE AVERALE PEOPLE DIDN'T POSSESS THE
 RESOURCES TO HAVE CHILDREN
 I WISH I'D MARRIED A REAL MAN,
 WITH A PATHOLO6ICAL DESIRE To
 FIND MULTIPLE USES
 FOR LEFTOVER
 INDUSTRIAL
 ELULOSE.!
 ME
 I WONT
 DESIGN
 HAVE THI
 ARGUMENT
 A6AIN,
 I WONT
 RuLe
 AS THE BASELINE HUMAN BEING BECAME STRANGER, THE OUTLIERS BECAME
 EVER MORE USE FUL. IT SAYS HERE YoU HAVE
 EXPERIENCE IN PLUMBING, OUT NONE
 OF YOUR EXTREMITIES AKE SHAPED
 LIKE ALLEN WRENCHES
 BUT-
 I'M
 SORRY
 HUMANITY SPECIATED INTO ENDLESS FORMS MOST FUNCTIONAL-
 AUTOMOTIVE REPARIANS
 CHEMICAL ENGINESE
 COMPUTER PRObRAMMERFOLK
 TAP-A
 TAP-A
 TAP-A
 TAP-A
 WHEN THE TIME CAME TO MERGE WITH OUR TOOLS, THERE THERE ARE NO MACHINES. THERE 1S NO NATURE
 WAS NO HUMANITY LEFT IN US TO OPPoSE THE CHANGe. ONLY THE ORIVE TO EVER 6REATER HEIGHTS
 WE WANT TO PUT SOME ELECTRODES
 ON YOUR CEREBELLUM So YOU'RE NO
 LONGER ABLE TO STOP THINKING
 AB0UT INDUSTRIAL SOLVENTS
 OF PRODUCTIVITY
 My WHOLE LIFE
 HAS BEEN LEADING
 UP To THiS MOMENT
 IT'5 BETTER THIS WAY.AN YoU IMAGINE WHAT IT WAS LIkE GEING
 ISTRACTED 8Y Love, HoPE, AND BEAUTY
 WHEN You REALLY NEEDED To Focus
 ON MAKING SMOOTHER
 BERYLLIUM
 SPHERES?
 WHAT A
 NI6HTMARE
<p><a href="https://omg-images.tumblr.com/post/167391548432/saturday-morning-breakfast-cereal-specialization" class="tumblr_blog">omg-images</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p>Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Specialization</p></blockquote>

omg-images: Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Specialization