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    Apple, Fresh, and Frozen: Hom fo
 mahe a smoothie
 Behold, the smoothie.
 A meal in a glass. And not just any meal. A fast one too.
 And done right, packed with vitamins, minerals, antioxidants
 healthy fats and so much more. Not only nutritious, but super delicious.
 Replace a meal such as breakfast or use it as a supplement or
 Stay healthy, lose weight, gain weight. Adapt it anyway you
 There's so much more to smoothies than fruit, yogurt and
 Here's how to make a smoothie- awesomel
 1 ADD FRUIT
 Choose at least 2 types of fruit- fresh or frozen. And for a super healthy
 smoothie - make it green, adding vegetables such as kale, spinach & arugula
 Barana
 BerriesPearl apple WatermelonPeach
 SpinachKale ugulaBoet greens Dandeion
 greens
 2 CHOOSE A BASE
 Add 1 2 Cups of liquid. The more juice your chosen fr
 have, the less liquid you need to add
 Fruit juiceIced coffee
 ced
 green tea
 Wator
 ricel almond
 soy mik
 water/ mik
 3 THICKEN UP
 Thicken your smoothie to get the right consistencyl creaminess
 whilst making it more nutritious
 Nut buter Yogurt/k e cream
 (e.g peanut) cottage cheese frozen yogurt cubes
 CoounutChiasood
 Oata
 meat poylium busksbeans
 4 FLAVOR IT
 Boost flavor with sweeteners, spices, fruits and herbs. Spices such as
 cinnamon add a layer of sweetness, without adding extra calories
 Honay
 Figs
 Dates
 Vanilal
 almond extract
 Nutmeg
 (eg minu basi)
 5 POWER BOOST
 Take your smoothie to the next level with highly nutritive superfoods
 Protein powder Fish ol Goj berries
 Sprouts Ground flaxsends
 VitaminSpirulnal
 powderwhealgrass aair
 green powderpowder
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Apple, Fresh, and Frozen: Hom fo
 mahe a smoothie
 Behold, the smoothie.
 A meal in a glass. And not just any meal. A fast one too.
 And done right, packed with vitamins, minerals, antioxidants
 healthy fats and so much more. Not only nutritious, but super delicious.
 Replace a meal such as breakfast or use it as a supplement or
 Stay healthy, lose weight, gain weight. Adapt it anyway you
 There's so much more to smoothies than fruit, yogurt and
 Here's how to make a smoothie- awesomel
 1 ADD FRUIT
 Choose at least 2 types of fruit- fresh or frozen. And for a super healthy
 smoothie - make it green, adding vegetables such as kale, spinach & arugula
 Barana
 BerriesPearl apple WatermelonPeach
 SpinachKale ugulaBoet greens Dandeion
 greens
 2 CHOOSE A BASE
 Add 1 2 Cups of liquid. The more juice your chosen fr
 have, the less liquid you need to add
 Fruit juiceIced coffee
 ced
 green tea
 Wator
 ricel almond
 soy mik
 water/ mik
 3 THICKEN UP
 Thicken your smoothie to get the right consistencyl creaminess
 whilst making it more nutritious
 Nut buter Yogurt/k e cream
 (e.g peanut) cottage cheese frozen yogurt cubes
 CoounutChiasood
 Oata
 meat poylium busksbeans
 4 FLAVOR IT
 Boost flavor with sweeteners, spices, fruits and herbs. Spices such as
 cinnamon add a layer of sweetness, without adding extra calories
 Honay
 Figs
 Dates
 Vanilal
 almond extract
 Nutmeg
 (eg minu basi)
 5 POWER BOOST
 Take your smoothie to the next level with highly nutritive superfoods
 Protein powder Fish ol Goj berries
 Sprouts Ground flaxsends
 VitaminSpirulnal
 powderwhealgrass aair
 green powderpowder
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie
                
            

            
            
srsfunny:Behold, The Smoothie

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Bad, Community, and Crying: Emergency Jaw Sugery Fund
 Be the first to share
 Tweet
 Share
thats-tea:
thats-tea:

Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on twitter. We told her to create a GoFundMe so the community could help and she was nervous to. If you could help her it would mean a lot, and would help her through something she’s been going through for a long time.
Here’s her post:
“Hello everyone! When I was born my jaw was significantly smaller than it should normally be and my mother was told by doctors that they should brake my jaw as an infant and add an implant so I wouldn’t have to worry about jaw problems in the future, my mother refused so that has what brought me to make this gofundme. I’m 21 years old and I provide for my family, I currently saved over 5,000 dollars by myself, recently I left my job for another opportunity and the other job opportunity ended up being horrible so I need this help more than ever. My jaw/teeth situation has gotten worse and worse in past months as my teeth are growing into my gums and it has effected my sleep and mental health, it’s gotten to the point where I get very bad lock jaw and can barley speak.The surgery itself is 7,600 dollars and in total with the hospital room and anesthesia its 9,910, I’ve already saved half of that.
Please help if you can, thank you so much for reading this.”
GoFundMe
It would mean a lot if you could donate anything you can. If you can’t that’s okay as well, you’d also be doing a lot if you shared. Thank you, and sorry for taking up your time.

We’ve personally donated $900. We helped her apply for an influencer job on twitter, and it’s looking like they’re going to accept her, so she’s scared to put her image there or would make the post directly on twitter. She’s nervous it might hurt her in getting the job, since she’s been out of a job for awhile, and she’s afraid if she misses this chance she’d continue being out of a job for a long time. We’ve been helping her get a new job because of the conditions she’s in
She’s extremely scared she’ll lose the opportunity if she’s seen by those checking her accounts that she’d lose this opportunity, and we tried to convince her.
Normally when people come to us and report they’re going through something, we pay their costs directly. Including rent, food, cellphone/electricity bills, among other things. So we’re constantly spending high hundreds to thousands a week/month. When it comes to situations when the person needs thousands, we can’t/don’t give directly thousands to one person, it prevents us from helping the others who comes to us for help with the money we set aside to help people. Normally take over a person’s problem by paying monthly if possible, if they could make that plan. we had her create this gofundme specifically because she was crying about jaw pain. If this doesn’t work, next month we’ll have money aside to pay for it completely. We had her make this GoFundMe specifically because physical pain was involved. If it doesn’t work here on tumblr, I’ll try and force her to have the post made on twitter/facebook since this is a matter of pain. 

We’ve also been helping with her living conditions which we’ll keep private.

 If she insists, next month we’ll set enough aside to personally pay her entire thing and ask her to just bear through it for this month.
Though we never make these posts, In the coming future we’ll be able to do even more for people and our budget limits will rise even more so we won’t ever have to ask the public. It’s only because it’s a current matter of physical pain, it would mean a lot if you can donate anything. 

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bad, Community, and Crying: Emergency Jaw Sugery Fund
 Be the first to share
 Tweet
 Share
thats-tea:
thats-tea:

Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on twitter. We told her to create a GoFundMe so the community could help and she was nervous to. If you could help her it would mean a lot, and would help her through something she’s been going through for a long time.
Here’s her post:
“Hello everyone! When I was born my jaw was significantly smaller than it should normally be and my mother was told by doctors that they should brake my jaw as an infant and add an implant so I wouldn’t have to worry about jaw problems in the future, my mother refused so that has what brought me to make this gofundme. I’m 21 years old and I provide for my family, I currently saved over 5,000 dollars by myself, recently I left my job for another opportunity and the other job opportunity ended up being horrible so I need this help more than ever. My jaw/teeth situation has gotten worse and worse in past months as my teeth are growing into my gums and it has effected my sleep and mental health, it’s gotten to the point where I get very bad lock jaw and can barley speak.The surgery itself is 7,600 dollars and in total with the hospital room and anesthesia its 9,910, I’ve already saved half of that.
Please help if you can, thank you so much for reading this.”
GoFundMe
It would mean a lot if you could donate anything you can. If you can’t that’s okay as well, you’d also be doing a lot if you shared. Thank you, and sorry for taking up your time.

We’ve personally donated $900. We helped her apply for an influencer job on twitter, and it’s looking like they’re going to accept her, so she’s scared to put her image there or would make the post directly on twitter. She’s nervous it might hurt her in getting the job, since she’s been out of a job for awhile, and she’s afraid if she misses this chance she’d continue being out of a job for a long time. We’ve been helping her get a new job because of the conditions she’s in
She’s extremely scared she’ll lose the opportunity if she’s seen by those checking her accounts that she’d lose this opportunity, and we tried to convince her.
Normally when people come to us and report they’re going through something, we pay their costs directly. Including rent, food, cellphone/electricity bills, among other things. So we’re constantly spending high hundreds to thousands a week/month. When it comes to situations when the person needs thousands, we can’t/don’t give directly thousands to one person, it prevents us from helping the others who comes to us for help with the money we set aside to help people. Normally take over a person’s problem by paying monthly if possible, if they could make that plan. we had her create this gofundme specifically because she was crying about jaw pain. If this doesn’t work, next month we’ll have money aside to pay for it completely. We had her make this GoFundMe specifically because physical pain was involved. If it doesn’t work here on tumblr, I’ll try and force her to have the post made on twitter/facebook since this is a matter of pain. 

We’ve also been helping with her living conditions which we’ll keep private.

 If she insists, next month we’ll set enough aside to personally pay her entire thing and ask her to just bear through it for this month.
Though we never make these posts, In the coming future we’ll be able to do even more for people and our budget limits will rise even more so we won’t ever have to ask the public. It’s only because it’s a current matter of physical pain, it would mean a lot if you can donate anything. 

                
            

            
            
thats-tea:
thats-tea:

Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months o...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

                
            

            
            
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

                
            

            
            
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Bad, Community, and Family: Emergency Jaw Sugery Fund
 Be the first to share
 Tweet
 Share
thats-tea:
Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on twitter. We told her to create a GoFundMe so the community could help and she was nervous to. If you could help her it would mean a lot, and would help her through something she’s been going through for a long time.
Here’s her post:
“Hello everyone! When I was born my jaw was significantly smaller than it should normally be and my mother was told by doctors that they should brake my jaw as an infant and add an implant so I wouldn’t have to worry about jaw problems in the future, my mother refused so that has what brought me to make this gofundme. I’m 21 years old and I provide for my family, I currently saved over 5,000 dollars by myself, recently I left my job for another opportunity and the other job opportunity ended up being horrible so I need this help more than ever. My jaw/teeth situation has gotten worse and worse in past months as my teeth are growing into my gums and it has effected my sleep and mental health, it’s gotten to the point where I get very bad lock jaw and can barley speak.The surgery itself is 7,600 dollars and in total with the hospital room and anesthesia its 9,910, I’ve already saved half of that.
Please help if you can, thank you so much for reading this.”
GoFundMe
It would mean a lot if you could donate anything you can. If you can’t that’s okay as well, you’d also be doing a lot if you shared. Thank you, and sorry for taking up your time.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bad, Community, and Family: Emergency Jaw Sugery Fund
 Be the first to share
 Tweet
 Share
thats-tea:
Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on twitter. We told her to create a GoFundMe so the community could help and she was nervous to. If you could help her it would mean a lot, and would help her through something she’s been going through for a long time.
Here’s her post:
“Hello everyone! When I was born my jaw was significantly smaller than it should normally be and my mother was told by doctors that they should brake my jaw as an infant and add an implant so I wouldn’t have to worry about jaw problems in the future, my mother refused so that has what brought me to make this gofundme. I’m 21 years old and I provide for my family, I currently saved over 5,000 dollars by myself, recently I left my job for another opportunity and the other job opportunity ended up being horrible so I need this help more than ever. My jaw/teeth situation has gotten worse and worse in past months as my teeth are growing into my gums and it has effected my sleep and mental health, it’s gotten to the point where I get very bad lock jaw and can barley speak.The surgery itself is 7,600 dollars and in total with the hospital room and anesthesia its 9,910, I’ve already saved half of that.
Please help if you can, thank you so much for reading this.”
GoFundMe
It would mean a lot if you could donate anything you can. If you can’t that’s okay as well, you’d also be doing a lot if you shared. Thank you, and sorry for taking up your time.

                
            

            
            
thats-tea:
Everyone, a woman came to us on twitter to ask for help. We’ve seen her speak about her pain in the past few months of being on t...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Bad, Beautiful, and Fucking: Take
 the
 breadsticks
 Young
 Man
 and
 run
 Man
 young [door
 man hand
 hook
 said
 car
 gun
deceit-the-snakey-snake:
plaid-n-converse:

cherrysconeslut:


pawsofponies:


garecc:

inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:


inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:

buggykin:

inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:


inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:

biggest-goofiest-fish:

desertdaylight:


kait-the-kitty:

chiribomb:

politicalcompassmemes:

your-uncle-dave:

maps-and-elvis-and-zelda-n-shit:

japhers:

jewishzevran:

animatedamerican:

pagesofkenna:

mommacomms:

fidefortitude:

bl00dlikeice:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

plaid-n-converse:

memeception

WE’VE HIT TERMINAL MEME

@caesarianconfection

I’ve said “I hate this” so many times on this website, and never actually meant it, because “I hate this” is just shorthand for ‘this is an example of a meme given a twist I wasn’t expecting with intent to surprise’. Which is, in of itself, a meme on this site. God damn it.
But this… This is something else.
The rapidity of a meme’s introduction to its zenith to its decline is so rapid that in ten years, you’ll need a damn twenty-page manual to explain this. It’ll be as unfunny and hard to explain as jokes in Shakespeare plays, except even more inexplicable because fuck, at least Shakespeare’s jokes are usually about anal or fucking your mother, good wholesome sex jokes we can all get behind.
For the love of fuck, how do you explain loss.jpg? How do you explain gun?

….I THOUGHT THIS WAS A YMCA REFERENCE

it is a YMCA reference - that’s one of the 6 memes being represented here
ok let me see if i can break this down easily. YMCA is the easiest place to start - the song itself has become a meme over time with people changing the lyrics to reference other pop cultural events. so YMCA is meme one (1)
this first lyric replacement (”take the breadsticks and run”) is a reference to the tumblr meme ‘stuffing breadsticks into my purse’. i think everyone remembers that one so i wont bother to explain it. that’s meme two (2)
“man door hand hook car door” is a meme of its own, a creepypasta from i dont remember when. it was a terrible stupid retelling of the generic ‘stuck in a car while hook handed man tries to kill us’ story so the stupid title caught on for memorability. that in and of itself is meme three (3)
‘gun’ is… yeah i dont know how to explain gun. long story short you add gun to the end of a phrase instead of what you expect the last word to be. its shock funny. its everywhere but its popular to add to “man door hand hook car door” for.. some reason? gun is meme four (4)
and the thing is, this four meme combo is something thats gone around before. meme combos are, itself, a meme. which means taking this meme combo and mixing in another meme actually becomes meme five (5)
which leaves us at loss.jpg. loss.jpg was a terrible bad comic supposed to be about some tragic event, but it was presented so poorly literally no one takes it seriously, and for some reason recreating the four-panel setup has become popular. so thats meme six (6)
(but i need to add that this is the greatest version of loss.jpg i think i’ve ever seen. the initial ‘young man’ lines up with the guy bursting through the door, and the shock meme ‘gun’ matches the shock scene of the woman in the hospital and idk if OP even thought about that but it makes this just so much better)

I wasn’t going to reblog this, but @pagesofkenna‘s comprehensive meme-by-meme annotation is a thing of beauty and should be shared.

average tumblr post contains one meme, this post, which contains six, is an outlier and should not be counted

it might also just be a coincidence due to loss.jpg’s format but the whole white minimalist four-panel setup is also suspiciously reminiscent of those early 2000’s rage comics

I was getting a political compass vibe too

tag urself im man door hand hook car gun


This works better than I thought it would. 


This was in my senior project 

I’m not sorry.

EIGHT MEME COMBO


FATALITY

We have officially created a new language 

I just had to do it to em


THIS FUCKING THREAD I’M GONNA CRY
I LOST IT AND MAN DOOR HAND HOOK CAR GUN AND DIDN’T EXPECT MORE I’M SOBBING

M E M E T E N

OwO?




W o w


You know I had to 


I hope you know this is the most cursed addition to my post, and I love it


THIRTEEN!?


MEME COUNT:1 - YMCA (@plaid-n-converse, pointed out by @pagesofkenna)2 - breadsticks (see above)3 - man door hand hook car door (see above)4 - gun (see above)5 - meme combo (see above)6 - loss (see above)7 - 2000s comics vibes (@plaid-n-converse, as pointed out by @japhers)8 - political compass (@plaid-n-converse, as pointed out by @maps-and-elvis-and-zelda-n-shit, then highlighted by @politicalcompassmemes)9 - tag yourself (user was @your-uncle-dave but now appears to be deactivated)10 - i hate this (kind of barely used by @fidefortitude so idk if it really counts)11 - nickelback/look at this photograph (@inthishousewekinkshamefnaf)12 - had to do it to them (see above)13 - distracted boyfriend (see above)14 - is this a pigeon (see above)15 - oh, this is beautiful (@garecc)16 - expanding brain (@cherrysconeslut)17 - cursed (can be argues as a meme due to its excessive use and popularity, as well as the sort of subtext/emotion behind it that accompanies most memes on this site) (@plaid-n-converse)18 - weve created a new language (@inthishousewekinkshamefnaf)19 - owo (see above)20 - most ___ addition to a post (@plaid-n-converse)21 - it could be argued that meme analysis in itself is a memeFeel free to debate any of these or add any Ive missed, but I think I got them all??
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bad, Beautiful, and Fucking: Take
 the
 breadsticks
 Young
 Man
 and
 run
 Man
 young [door
 man hand
 hook
 said
 car
 gun
deceit-the-snakey-snake:
plaid-n-converse:

cherrysconeslut:


pawsofponies:


garecc:

inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:


inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:

buggykin:

inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:


inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:

biggest-goofiest-fish:

desertdaylight:


kait-the-kitty:

chiribomb:

politicalcompassmemes:

your-uncle-dave:

maps-and-elvis-and-zelda-n-shit:

japhers:

jewishzevran:

animatedamerican:

pagesofkenna:

mommacomms:

fidefortitude:

bl00dlikeice:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

plaid-n-converse:

memeception

WE’VE HIT TERMINAL MEME

@caesarianconfection

I’ve said “I hate this” so many times on this website, and never actually meant it, because “I hate this” is just shorthand for ‘this is an example of a meme given a twist I wasn’t expecting with intent to surprise’. Which is, in of itself, a meme on this site. God damn it.
But this… This is something else.
The rapidity of a meme’s introduction to its zenith to its decline is so rapid that in ten years, you’ll need a damn twenty-page manual to explain this. It’ll be as unfunny and hard to explain as jokes in Shakespeare plays, except even more inexplicable because fuck, at least Shakespeare’s jokes are usually about anal or fucking your mother, good wholesome sex jokes we can all get behind.
For the love of fuck, how do you explain loss.jpg? How do you explain gun?

….I THOUGHT THIS WAS A YMCA REFERENCE

it is a YMCA reference - that’s one of the 6 memes being represented here
ok let me see if i can break this down easily. YMCA is the easiest place to start - the song itself has become a meme over time with people changing the lyrics to reference other pop cultural events. so YMCA is meme one (1)
this first lyric replacement (”take the breadsticks and run”) is a reference to the tumblr meme ‘stuffing breadsticks into my purse’. i think everyone remembers that one so i wont bother to explain it. that’s meme two (2)
“man door hand hook car door” is a meme of its own, a creepypasta from i dont remember when. it was a terrible stupid retelling of the generic ‘stuck in a car while hook handed man tries to kill us’ story so the stupid title caught on for memorability. that in and of itself is meme three (3)
‘gun’ is… yeah i dont know how to explain gun. long story short you add gun to the end of a phrase instead of what you expect the last word to be. its shock funny. its everywhere but its popular to add to “man door hand hook car door” for.. some reason? gun is meme four (4)
and the thing is, this four meme combo is something thats gone around before. meme combos are, itself, a meme. which means taking this meme combo and mixing in another meme actually becomes meme five (5)
which leaves us at loss.jpg. loss.jpg was a terrible bad comic supposed to be about some tragic event, but it was presented so poorly literally no one takes it seriously, and for some reason recreating the four-panel setup has become popular. so thats meme six (6)
(but i need to add that this is the greatest version of loss.jpg i think i’ve ever seen. the initial ‘young man’ lines up with the guy bursting through the door, and the shock meme ‘gun’ matches the shock scene of the woman in the hospital and idk if OP even thought about that but it makes this just so much better)

I wasn’t going to reblog this, but @pagesofkenna‘s comprehensive meme-by-meme annotation is a thing of beauty and should be shared.

average tumblr post contains one meme, this post, which contains six, is an outlier and should not be counted

it might also just be a coincidence due to loss.jpg’s format but the whole white minimalist four-panel setup is also suspiciously reminiscent of those early 2000’s rage comics

I was getting a political compass vibe too

tag urself im man door hand hook car gun


This works better than I thought it would. 


This was in my senior project 

I’m not sorry.

EIGHT MEME COMBO


FATALITY

We have officially created a new language 

I just had to do it to em


THIS FUCKING THREAD I’M GONNA CRY
I LOST IT AND MAN DOOR HAND HOOK CAR GUN AND DIDN’T EXPECT MORE I’M SOBBING

M E M E T E N

OwO?




W o w


You know I had to 


I hope you know this is the most cursed addition to my post, and I love it


THIRTEEN!?


MEME COUNT:1 - YMCA (@plaid-n-converse, pointed out by @pagesofkenna)2 - breadsticks (see above)3 - man door hand hook car door (see above)4 - gun (see above)5 - meme combo (see above)6 - loss (see above)7 - 2000s comics vibes (@plaid-n-converse, as pointed out by @japhers)8 - political compass (@plaid-n-converse, as pointed out by @maps-and-elvis-and-zelda-n-shit, then highlighted by @politicalcompassmemes)9 - tag yourself (user was @your-uncle-dave but now appears to be deactivated)10 - i hate this (kind of barely used by @fidefortitude so idk if it really counts)11 - nickelback/look at this photograph (@inthishousewekinkshamefnaf)12 - had to do it to them (see above)13 - distracted boyfriend (see above)14 - is this a pigeon (see above)15 - oh, this is beautiful (@garecc)16 - expanding brain (@cherrysconeslut)17 - cursed (can be argues as a meme due to its excessive use and popularity, as well as the sort of subtext/emotion behind it that accompanies most memes on this site) (@plaid-n-converse)18 - weve created a new language (@inthishousewekinkshamefnaf)19 - owo (see above)20 - most ___ addition to a post (@plaid-n-converse)21 - it could be argued that meme analysis in itself is a memeFeel free to debate any of these or add any Ive missed, but I think I got them all??
                
            

            
            
deceit-the-snakey-snake:
plaid-n-converse:

cherrysconeslut:


pawsofponies:


garecc:

inthishousewekinkshamefnaf:


inthishousewekinkshame...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, Amazon, and College: did you know?
 There's an app that pays people to go online.
 Nielsen, the organization that does TV ratings,
 now measures the popularity of websites and
 online videos. To do that, they'll pay you just to
 1.) Join the Nielsen panel at InternetPanel.org
 2.) Get the free app on your phone/computer,
 3.) Use the internet the same way you do now.
 It's that simple! Panel members receive cash
 and Amazon gift cards just to use the internet.
 nielsen
 PHOTO: INTERNETPANEL.ORG
 DID YOU KNOW?
collegehackable:
cntnd:

zarb:

You guys, I looked into it and this is legitimate. According to Wikipedia, Nielsen has been a trusted name since the 1920s, first measuring what radio stations people listened to. In the 1950s, they got into television ratings and now they’re measuring the popularity of stuff online. I can’t believe they’re gonna start paying me to watch youtube videos… I’m truly living in 3019
It took me less than 5 minutes to sign up here

GUYS… in 2019 we live in 3019

I usually scroll past these sorta posts, but I know a lot of broke college kids follow me and want someone to verify if this is real. After doing my homework, I learned that the Nielsen internet panel is undeniably real.
(Source: TV Technology)
If you’re worried about what data they collect, this is from Nielsen’s website:
TL;DR they only want to know what websites you visit, how long you spend on those sites, etc. and they NEVER collect sensitive data such as usernames, passwords, login information, bank, or credit card information.
Facebook already collects (and sells) your data. The difference is that Nielsen wants to pay you and they’re not sneaky about it. So yes, you can quite literally get paid to watch youtube videos.
Pro-Tip: to make the most money, you guys should join the panel on your computer AND your phone because you can earn more for multiple devices. Besides regular rewards, Nielsen gives away $10,000 cash each month. You could receive a thousand dollars in one month from the sweepstakes alone. If you keep Nielsen on your computer, you’ll be automatically entered into their monthly sweepstakes, so the app is a must-have on laptop or desktop. Two people win $1000 each month and four hundred people win cash prizes. Another reason to add multiple devices is that 

annually they will pay you $50 per mobile device you connect, so it pays to put Nielsen on all your devices, even that old phone in a drawer somewhere if it’ll turn on. Tablets work too, as do iPods and E-Readers.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, Amazon, and College: did you know?
 There's an app that pays people to go online.
 Nielsen, the organization that does TV ratings,
 now measures the popularity of websites and
 online videos. To do that, they'll pay you just to
 1.) Join the Nielsen panel at InternetPanel.org
 2.) Get the free app on your phone/computer,
 3.) Use the internet the same way you do now.
 It's that simple! Panel members receive cash
 and Amazon gift cards just to use the internet.
 nielsen
 PHOTO: INTERNETPANEL.ORG
 DID YOU KNOW?
collegehackable:
cntnd:

zarb:

You guys, I looked into it and this is legitimate. According to Wikipedia, Nielsen has been a trusted name since the 1920s, first measuring what radio stations people listened to. In the 1950s, they got into television ratings and now they’re measuring the popularity of stuff online. I can’t believe they’re gonna start paying me to watch youtube videos… I’m truly living in 3019
It took me less than 5 minutes to sign up here

GUYS… in 2019 we live in 3019

I usually scroll past these sorta posts, but I know a lot of broke college kids follow me and want someone to verify if this is real. After doing my homework, I learned that the Nielsen internet panel is undeniably real.
(Source: TV Technology)
If you’re worried about what data they collect, this is from Nielsen’s website:
TL;DR they only want to know what websites you visit, how long you spend on those sites, etc. and they NEVER collect sensitive data such as usernames, passwords, login information, bank, or credit card information.
Facebook already collects (and sells) your data. The difference is that Nielsen wants to pay you and they’re not sneaky about it. So yes, you can quite literally get paid to watch youtube videos.
Pro-Tip: to make the most money, you guys should join the panel on your computer AND your phone because you can earn more for multiple devices. Besides regular rewards, Nielsen gives away $10,000 cash each month. You could receive a thousand dollars in one month from the sweepstakes alone. If you keep Nielsen on your computer, you’ll be automatically entered into their monthly sweepstakes, so the app is a must-have on laptop or desktop. Two people win $1000 each month and four hundred people win cash prizes. Another reason to add multiple devices is that 

annually they will pay you $50 per mobile device you connect, so it pays to put Nielsen on all your devices, even that old phone in a drawer somewhere if it’ll turn on. Tablets work too, as do iPods and E-Readers.

                
            

            
            
collegehackable:
cntnd:

zarb:

You guys, I looked into it and this is legitimate. According to Wikipedia, Nielsen has been a trusted name s...