My bros I have been doing a lot of reading about Wacky wwil Hjinks lately and I want to tel you a slory because I love it okay once upon a time there was a dude in Spain named Juan Pujol Garcia Pujol was a chicken famer Pujol hated him some goddamn fascists See Span had recently ended its civt war with the fascists taking power So when wwll broke out in Europe Spain technically remained neutrail but in practice was buddy buddy with the Nazis Juan Pujol Garcia thought this was pretty bulishit so soon ater war breaks out Pujol travels to his local British embassy and goes heyI wanna spy on the Nazis for you who the fuck are you? say the Brtish and kick him out but Pujol is not deterredl He stil wants to dunk on some fascists so now he goes to his local Geman embassy instead hey he says 1 wanna spy on the Brtish for you I sure do hate them yeah okay say the Germans that seems pretty legit and just like that Pujol now officialy warks for the Abwehr the German intelligence agency They hand him some spy gear invisible Ink and such and instruct him to travel lo Lisbon and from there make his way into the UK So Pujol heads to Lisbon and a ltde while later writes to his German handliers teling them he's made it to England Pujol had not made it to England He had in fact made t to the Lisbon public library where he checked out a number of English guide bocks and set about just wholesavle making smr up this is sighy complicated by he fact that for example he completely did not understand British currency and all his expense reports were basicaly gibberish He also reported things like brioing Scotsmen because the people of Glasgow would do anything tor a Itre of wine an actual quote because hey people in Spain lke wine so that's probably the same nigh? Here is where it starts to get realy crazy because the Atwehr Joves tns woW this dude is a great spy they say because apparenty none of them had ever been the England esther In fact they are so pumped about this new awesome spy that the British stairt to get worried you see by this time the British had cracked German's supposedly unbreakable Enigma code and were totally dunking on the Nazis by reading basically all of ther-super top secret-radio transmissions And crucially they'd become so good at breaking and reading traffic that there were iterally no German spies in England The Germans would set up a spy drop usually dropping duces in by parachute in the middle of the night the Brtish would intercept the message and then just scoop the dudes up as soon as they landed in a move that must have been SUPER embarrassing to the spies so there are no Geman spies in the UK because theyre all shting in a prison run by MI5 although some are being run under supervision as double agents feeding Genmany builshit But suddenly MI5 is picking up all this traffic from the Germans talking about their super great spy- a spy the Bntish do not have in their jail oh shit says MI5 and starts rereading all the transmissions they have to and from this mysterious super spy hey wait says MI5 upon actually reading the shit the spy was sending someone is playing sily buggers pip pip cheerio At this point Pujol sll in Lisbon had actualily been approaching the British embassy again repeatedly but apparently 1 am literally an Abwehr agent and would like to offer you my services wasn't interesting enough because he was repeatedly turned away again it want until MIS started asking around that one of the embassy staf was like oh yeah we know that guy so in 1942 the British finally make contact with Pujol and he officially becomes a spy for Mi5 They move him to London and assign him a case oicer so he can start making up even better bulshit and he does Once actually in London Pujol reports to the Abwehr that he d recruited a whole slew of informants from a bunch of Welsh Aryans to disaffected army officers He ends up wih a network of 20+ sub-spies all feeding him information from around the U none of mese people actualy exist Pujol just straight up invented like 20 people keeping careful track of their fake personalties names and actvities with the hep of Mi5 the information he sends becomes even better- a mix of true but ultimately useless facis and actualy important intel tmed to artve in Germany just sightly too late to be af any use He and his spy network become the Abwehr's most trusted agents Pujol now codenamed Agent Garbo for his acting skils ends up playing a huge role in the run-up to D-Day where the Alies mounted a huge intellgenoe campaign to convince Htler that the planned sile of attack was going to be Calais and not Normandy this was Operation Fortitude and you should absolulely look t up lor more Wacky WWll Adventures Obviously you know how this ended crazly enough the Abwenr never figured out that Pujol was a double agent After the war he recelved both the Iron Cross Second Class which require personal authorization from Hitier and a Member of the Order of the Brtish Empire from King George Vi unable to resist being rotaly fucking ndiculous Pujol tumed down MI5's post-war offer to continue spying but this time against he USSR TO he said just help me fake my own death and then I'm moving to Venezuela and thats exacly what he ad Juan Garcia Pujol died in 1988 at the age of 76 Okay I'm just editing my reblog to add this picture of Juan Pujol Garcia because I feel that t adds so much to the story to picture him doing ALL THE ABOVE with this expression what a legend Juan Pujol GarciaThe first shitposter Meme

AF

apparently

crazy

dude

Dunk

Empire

England

fake

Fucking

Jail

Love

Radio

Run

shit

Soon...

Traffic

True

Wow

yeah

Wine

Prison

Army

Chicken

Cracked

Cross

Death

Europe

Fuck

Germany

Good

Help

Information

Intel

Library

London

Okay

Once Upon a Time

Power

Spain

The Middle

Time

Travel

British

Venezuela

Awesome

English

USSR

Acting

Never

Thought

All The

Asking

Been

how

tor

spy

personal

legend

d-day

super

add

quote

enigma

unbreakable

once

iron

war

secret

local

class

king

code

who

him

can

german

top

mi5

editing

network

one

currency

embassy

parachute

down

case

kick

legit

lisbon

set

intelligence

guide

day

public library

reading

names

pip

own

did

them

move

normandy

all

first

top secret

picture

huge

make

mis

they

double

public

new

you

gear

story

scoop

services

now

buddy

post

agency

example

nazis

what

agent

set up

made

order

for

campaign

span

breaking

operation

garcia

tns

travels

king george

supervision

once upon

use

straight

look

more

this

that guy

get

juan

gibberish

hey

oh shit

moving

great

broke

hate

like

sure

feel

this is

making

interesting

guy

people

what a

such

suddenly

drop

continue

help me

probably

hand

just

enough

anything

then

finally

embarrassing

because

technically

nigh

are you

wait

i love it

someone

and then

hes

i want to

useless

away

ther

for example

worried

seems

lately

the fuck

wacky

goddamn

too late

wanna

germans

heads

love it

george vi

garbo

spying

oh yeah

pretty

literally

fortitude

same

talking

their

ever

complicated

usually

although

aryans

actual

were

there

hep

sll

too

fact

bros

cheerio

duces

pumped

no

ink

message

night

see

things

better

way

know

want

later

understand

say

instead

said

much

around

like that

so much

in the middle of

lke

sub

none

late

again

totally

feeding

dunking

contact

so good

must have

completely

mysterious

supposedly

actual quote

who the fuck

invisible ink

at-this-point

pip-pip-cheerio

out

point

attack

playing

made-it

track

actualy

so pumped

pretty legit

who the fuck are you

wwll

bulshit

glasgow

And

You Know

Here

So There

Expression

We Know

Age

Both

When

A Lot

Number

Welsh

Actually

Making Up

I Love

George

That

I Want

Picture Of

But

Not

Where

For You

You Say

Invisible

Obviously

This Dude

The

The First

People In

Member

From

Basically

Died

It Starts

Important

You Should

Esther

Reported

Theyre

Yeah Okay

I Have

Its

Practice

Starts

Mix

Abwehr

Fake My Own Death

Keeping

Straight Up

Ends

The U

Checked Out

Lor

Realy

The Shit

Slew

Ended

Role

While

Start

Dudes

Checked

After

Wih

Sile

Turned

Thats

Bunch

Breaks

Was

With

I Feel That

Resist

Figured Out

Reports

Middle

In A

Should

Are

Have

Going

Taking

The War

Had

Goes

Do Not

Also

I Feel

Wheres The

You My

Instructables

Adds

Chickens

Exist

Which

About

Does

Lot

Crosses

Being

King George Vi

Most

Against

Added

Figured

Geman

Londons

Must

Scooping

Smr

Tel

The People

A Chicken

Doing

My Own

They Say

Hated

Second

Wants

Secretly

Convince

Says

Become

Started

Dropping

Trusted

Even

His

Exists

Some

Careful

Crossed

Above

Planned

Traveled

Roles

Offering

Locals

Informants

Iron Cross

Offers

Reblog

Repeatedly

Run Up

Staf

The Same

1 Am

A Bunch Of

A Lot Of

Adding

After The

Age Of

Alies

All The Above

All This

And Just Like That

And You

Any

Army Officers

Assignments

Ater

Buddy Buddy

Bunch Of

Butting In

Codeing

Double Agent

Dropped

Even Better

Expense

Fakeness

Famer

For The

Good At

Hate Them

He Says

Hey People

Hey Wait

Huging

I Loved It

Im Moving

In England

In Germany

In The

Into

Is A

Is Not

Just Like That

Kick Him Out

Know That

Landed

Localization

Londoner

Loved It

Loving It

Make Contact

Middle Of The Night

Offer

Posting Wars

The Nazis

A Number Of

Agenting

All Of

And Such

Approaching

Aliese

Atere

Calais

Georgees

Heyi

Bunche

Irons

Hugee

Jaile

Mesed

Namese

Nighe

Nonee

Rolee

Siled

Torreds

Winee

As Soon As

Assign

Assignation

At The Age Of

Campaigner

Complicatedness

Crossing

Crossness

Englander

Exister

Existing

Gearing

Germaneness

Germanize

Here Is

Hugely

Hugeness

Instruct

Instructible

Instructional

Instructive

Intercept

Interceptive

Irone

Ironer

Ironize

Know How

Legits

Locale

Localism

Locality

Localize

Localizer

Locally

Membered

Mixe

Nones

Of Theirs

Offerable

Offerer

Operationalize

Pip Pip

Resistant

Resistantly

Resister

Resistibility

Resistible

Resistive

Second Class

Siles

Siling

The Runs

The Shits

Theyd

Tracked

Trafficability

Trafficator

The Order

found @ 24 likes ON 2019-03-08 23:28:03 BY awwmemes.com

source: tumblr