17989643>1798991617989966 18006 100 18006871 Anonymous 080316Wed213622 No 17989599 File 1white spidermanjpg 101 KB 900x695 >>17989392 >grow up in the countryside >home-schooled because my parents don't trust the government >otherwise they were great parents though don't have any neighbours or siblings so no friends >parents buy me comic books to spark my imagination >start really enjoying spiderman white spiderman becomes my favourite pic related so my parents make me a costume for my tenth birthday wear it everyday >parents encourage me to play outside more nothingoutheregif whatever pretend to be spiderman while jumping around the forest >fast-forward a few years always been tall for my age and by the time im 15 im 6ft >never really did sport though except for running around the forest like spiderman which i was getting pretty good at so pretty thin and lanky >one evening around 6ish while playing near the road into town I see a car's headlights stopped still on the road >go to investigate >peering from the trees I see some teenagers maybe 18 or so standing around the car first time i've seen people other than my parents in years >can't make out what they're saying but they seem distressed and jittery >want to go ask if i can help but scared they won't like me >one of them peers in my direction >it's around sunset so there's not loads of light unsure if he can see more or not >our eyes lock for what feels like hours hear boom and instinctively drop into a prone position guy looks away briefly as the car starts smoking >he looks back towards me but his gaze never settles wonder what he's looking for? >another one loudly says a naughty word >they grab all their stuff from the car and carry on on foot want to learn more so decide to follow them >take off my spiderman mask so they'll know i'm not really spiderman if they see me >but try to stay hidden because i think they might not like me >in my head im their guardian angel >after about an hour they come to a clearing cont? Anonymous 080316Wed214940 No17989643 17989689>17989916 >>17989966 >180061 00 >>18006871 >>17989599 >they begin to set up camp realise this is the same clearing where i reenact my justice league operas >my limited edition superman action figure is still buried there in a stunning twist when zod impris oned him at the end of my last episode >think i can casually walk over and explain the situation but notice one of them is standing by their camp's outskirt looking pretty intimidatingly into the forest >it's the same guy who was staring in my direction earlier decide to call him Weird Al >circle around the forest surrounding the opening looking for the easiest way to sneak into the camp >a twig snaps beneath me >suddenly weird al reacts really fast notice he's holding a gun and pointing it in my direction >don't think he can see me though since he keeps moving his aim around >realise they're playing commandos >pretty soon they get a fire going >it's pretty dark by now weird al's sitting with the others in a circle around the fire can hear them talking and laughing want to know what they're saying and still want my superman figure back >crawl on all 4 towards their camp cause im still playing spiderman >certain they can't see me in this dark get close enough to make out what they're saying >talking about ghosts and urban legends >never heard a good ghost story outside my comic books before >lie on the ground listening eventually fall as leep to their stories >wake up a couple of hours later fire's still burning but they're all gone probably inside their tents >stomachrumblingjpg >see they left some bags of food around >figure they won't mind if i take some some weird plastic wrapping with something crunchy inside >have to rip it open but inside is a salty treat remember to grab my spiderman >dig around and retrieve it worry about the fire notice it's attracting moths >i don't want these guys to be attacked by a swarm of moths in the morning >also don't want to contribute to greenhouse gas es unnecessarily cont Anonymous 080316Wed220348 No 17989689 1798970917989916 17989966 1800610018006871 217989643 use one of their water bottles to douse out the fire >decide to head home for the night but promise myself to visit them again tomorrow to see how they're doing >scamper away on all fours again because i remember im still supposed to be spiderman the next day >don't tell my parents about the campers because i've never had real friends and i'm scared my parents will grow concerned return around 5 >just before suns et >still wearing my spiderman suit without the mask >again wait at the edge of the clearing in the forest spying on them through my binocs >they've got new firewood lots of it >appear to be cooking a rabbit >not cool guys rabbits are our friends >begin to wonder what rabbit tastes like remember i need to focus weird al is by their tents looking at the forest qun by side on the other side of the fire one of his friends is looking out the other direction and appears to have a gun too >i see they're finally taking commandos seriously the other 3 people 2 girls and a guy are sitting close together the guy's tending to the rabbit and the girls are wrapped in a blanket watch them for a while one of the girls reminds me of mary-jane wonder if she can be my girlfriend like in the comic >eventually go back to weird al >feel something on my shoulder >drop by binocs as i swat a spider away >hear shouting >look over at the camp weird al's pointing his gun in my direction and shouting >the cooking trio back away >the other guy with the gun rushes to weird al's side >i'll call him friendly steve because he seems less tense >friendly steve points his gun in my direction too what the fuck? decide he's more like angry steve >not entirely convinced they're actually aiming at me >start circling the edge again like last night they seem to move their aim with me >hmm the afternoon with binoculars this time so i can pretend i have spidey-vision it's still bright enough cont Anonymous 080316Wed22 1616 No 17989709 17989752>>17989916 >17989966 >18006100 >>18006871 17989689 weird al starts shouting at me >can't make out what he's saying >it's better to say nothing and have people think you're stupid then open your mouth and confirm your stupidity >shouts at me again >have no idea what to do >parents were right i am too immature for social situations >tony stark would surely know what to do suddenly hear a loud bang and the tree next to me explodes well a chunk of it explodes off >instinctively crouch into prone pos ition >several more bangs >can't see weird al or angry steve very well cause they're surrounded by smoke but see a few flashes of light eventually realise they're shooting at me what did i ever do to them though? >run off on all fours again with my experience it's much faster than running >get home and start crying >parents ask what's wrong >tell them i met some cool youths and they didn't like me >parents hug me and tell me maybe it's because of my costume >mum thinks it's proof that i'm not ready to have friends dad insists that this could be good since im showing initiative by going out to meet people they settle on dressing me appropriately tomorrow so i could reintroduce myself >they assure me that if i just be myself the kids will like me take comfort in their words next day dress in an old t-shirt and sweat pants put on my best smile and head out to meet them >mum offers me some cherries before i leave for good luck >don't mind ifi do must've eaten like 30 cherries had cherry juice all over my mouth >as im wondering through the forest cherries attract flies which cause me to stop paying attention and i slip in deer feces >on the verge of tears cause i smell like deer shit want to head back but no! have to be strong if i'm ready for friends >heading towards camp i see mary-jane wandering around the forest she keeps calling out a name ben i think stand still watching her >she sees me >at first she winces remember what my parents told me about being social cont 17989794 >17989916 »17989966 »»18006 100 »»18006871 Anonymous 080316Wed22 3025 No 17989752 >17989709 smile at mary-jane >smile and the world smiles with you afterall >she doesn't smile >she takes a step back >have you seen my friend Ben she says she says it really fast repeat it back to her a couple of times to digest it and look down oh no! my parents say it's rude to break eye-contact >look back at her in the eye >well she says again i repeat it think and then say your friend ben i have not seen so she'll think i'm mysterious and mystic notice she's covering her nose >why? >she suddenly looks really scared >i go to comfort her and she immediately runs off into the forest >that was weird >carry on and come to the old factory river >you should never swim in it because there was a factory upstream that leaked its sewage into it my dad was really upset about it but apparently it wasn't illegal due to some weird loophole or something >hear talking crouch low and walk downstream towards the voices hiding behind bushes >see weird al and angry steve playing in the water >see all their stuff about 100m away on the shore >their guns! >guns are bad my parents always say and as the only resident on-site it's my duty to confiscate them until they're ready to leave walk over and take them weird al and angry steve don't even notice too busy playing >guns are heavy and so after around 20 minutes i put them in a ditch and cover them with leaves so i can get them later carry on towards their camp >get there and it's empty not a soul in sight rabbit leftovers are on a spit over the fire's remains since no one's around i decide to take a bite of the rabbit just to taste it easier said than done end up accidentally breaking the spit trying to tear a bit off >lose my balance and trample over one of the tents woops >draw a peace sign in the dirt in kry ptonian as a way of apologising the rabbit didn't even taste very good in the end make my way back home i would return in the evening cont Anonymous 080316Wed224300 No 17989794 17989839 »»17989916 »17989966 »»18006100 »»18006871 >17989752 gets dark out and i've changed my clothes id completely forgotten about the cherries on my face >mary-jane must've thought i was some sort of cherry bandit >face is all washed now though >put on my best suit afterall this is my last chance to make friends >thinking about it up until she ran away me and mary-jane actually got on pretty well maybe there's hope for us yet? work my way back to the edge of the clearing >their camp has a huge fire >they're all out of sight though no stories or cooking see that they didn't put the tent i trod on back up see the other tent rustle weird al rushes out past the fire >in the moonlight i just about make out him running 20m or so and then stopping >he stands still for another 30s with his back to the camp before running back to camp >just before he reaches the fire he stops and looks in my direction >has he seen me? hurrah i can finally introduce myself >he starts shaking and shouting not wanting a repeat of yesterday and I make myself visible by stepping out of the busges so they don't think I'm a deer or something weird al shouts at me and this time i hear what he says >Ben? Is that you? >l repeat it back >then realise what i said >of course im not ben idiot >remember to smile >find it hard to smile and talk so just shake my head >end up accidentally shaking my whole body >by now the rest of the gang has come out of the tent >i say the rest but there's only 4 of them >one of the guys is missing >that must be this ben they were asking about >begin to wonder myself where he is they're all staring at me weirdly and shivering even though it's summer >where's ben? I shout >angry steve whis pers to weird al and weird al shouts back that he doesn't know >then he shouts at me what have you done with Ben? >if this is a game i don't get it >decide the only way to earn their trust is to impress them cont »179899091798991617989966 180010831800497918006100 >1800687118008096 Anonymous 080316Wed225604 No 17989839 17989794 >drop down onto all fours and do my spiderman crawl so they'l see how agile i am >they immediately scream and all run away >how weird run after them matching their pace is surprisingly easy maybe cause the girls had short legs >follow weird al into the forest >the forest shields the moonlight so i can only see his silhouette >he turns to me Roger did you see that thing? it looked human but its movements can't think of anything to say so just nod weird al keeps talking saying how useful his Eyy Ar would be right now no idea what he means >eventually meet up with the others celebrations all round finally they accept me >they must've been impressed by my spiderman crawl afterall >angry steve says they should try to find the car what about ben? i muster in my best weird al impression to show Im one of many talents >'i hate to say it James but i think he's gone says the girl who's not mary-jane who on earth is James? suddenly mary-jane stops walking >what is it Sam? angry Steve asks >mary-jane whis pers in his ear >he raises his arm and starts pointing at us while counting >Ben's not here he says very slowly Weird Al replies yeah?! before suddenly standing up straight >he just screams RUN and takes off >everyone scatters >begin to think my new friends are a little weird decide to go home Never did find out what happened to Ben but that forest is full of ditches so he was probably just playing hide and seek Still can't believe weird al and angry steve were playing in the water my dad says the factory's chemicals mean that bathing in it will make your hair fall out for sure Anyway that's my weird story Me_irl Meme

Another one

apparently

Bad

Birthday

books

cars

Clothes

Crying

Dad

Deer

found ON 2019-11-08 07:02:28 BY awwmemes.com

source: reddit